Wife wary of husbanda s flirtatious e-mail

Dear Annie: A few weeks ago, I discovered that my husband had sent a mildly flirtatious e-mail to a female acquaintance.

[stemaxgizmo]

I send flirty emails. We all do it.

[orgon]

hell yes i love it 2 send me 1 got2win83 yahoo.com

[Steve]

He is just looking foe a little action on the side! No big deal.

[Pamela in red]

Red flag.

People in healthy marriages should not do this. It can escalate quickly and lead to online affairs.

He's not getting something in his relationship with his wife or he would not need to do this.

I've known of two divorces from online affairs. Bad idea.

[RichieRoxi]

Pamela in red wrote:

Red flag.
People in healthy marriages should not do this. It can escalate quickly and lead to online affairs.
He's not getting something in his relationship with his wife or he would not need to do this.
I've known of two divorces from online affairs. Bad idea.

Yep! I agree. Also, it's only an "Online affair" until they both meet up in person! Than it becomes a full blown "Affair"

[Pamela in red]

RichieRoxi wrote:

<quoted text>Yep! I agree. Also, it's only an "Online affair" until they both meet up in person! Than it becomes a full blown "Affair"

There's usually something emotional they are craving and not getting from their spouse. The person they e-mail boosts their ego and makes them feel important.

Yes, they sometimes do meet in person but even if they don't it can be detrimental to a marriage because they spend all of their time emailing and thinking about the other person. It can consume a person before they realize.

[watchhie]

too late if he is already doing it he is already unhappy in his marriage.

[RichieRoxi]

Pamela in red wrote:

<quoted text>
There's usually something emotional they are craving and not getting from their spouse. The person they e-mail boosts their ego and makes them feel important.
Yes, they sometimes do meet in person but even if they don't it can be detrimental to a marriage because they spend all of their time emailing and thinking about the other person. It can consume a person before they realize.

Definatly true. A lot of people think emotional cheating is a lot worse than physical cheating, and I think that way too, I wouldnt be thrilled about a sexual relationship if i caught her either though.

[Odninton]

stemaxgizmo wrote:

I send flirty emails. We all do it.

Speak for youself, just because you do it, it doesn't mean that everyone else does. Some see this as a type of emotional cheating too.

[Pamela in red]

watchhie wrote:

too late if he is already doing it he is already unhappy in his marriage.

If he hasn't attached himself emotionally to one of them there is still hope. Actually even if he has there may be hope. He just has to be willing to stop and his wife has to be willing to give him what he needs.

I have a sister in law that has been divorced twice. Her last husband had an online affair.

[Pamela in red]

RichieRoxi wrote:

<quoted text>Definatly true. A lot of people think emotional cheating is a lot worse than physical cheating, and I think that way too, I wouldnt be thrilled about a sexual relationship if i caught her either though.

It's true because a one night stand doesn't mean anything to them. Just sex. An emotional affair is a deeper attachment. In many cases they even love each other. If they met in person who knows if it would last but the fantasy is real enough to endanger their marriage.

[newanarchy]

I've been through this, it went on behind my back for years and now it's happening again, tried counseling but that changed nothing. My wife obviously doesn't want what I can give or she wouldn't be doing this. I really don't have a clue what to do and am ready to just give up.