JM_Brazil

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Utah outlaws bubblegum

Agreed Tarzan would be funnier, however squirting coffee out of your nose is no laughing matter.  (Friday Dec 4 | post #85)

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Ohio charity workers find marijuana in donated jug

Meanwhile, back at home; "Mom, where's that old water jug out in the garage?"  (Friday Dec 4 | post #2)

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Space alien search costs AZ school worker his job

A million dollars for removing a program from a network? I hope that includes an excorcism to rid the network of any alien spirits the software may have attracted.  (Friday Dec 4 | post #7)

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Caught On Camera: Walmart Greeter Punched In Face

These are examples of Cold as an adjective. You don't 'cold shoulder' anyone, you GIVE them the cold shoulder. But in the phrase [to 'cold clock' someone], cold is being used as part of a phrasal verb, which to me is incorrect.  (Friday Dec 4 | post #24)

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High school student is punished for making a funny face in her ...

Don't know, but I'll guess it's not for making funny faces.  (Friday Dec 4 | post #18)

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Un-PC "Lil Monkey" Doll Dropped from Costco

Thanks Bob! Feeling better now?  (Wednesday Nov 25 | post #112)

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Canadian woman loses benefits over Facebook photo

She was only pretending to have fun. Surely that'll hold up in court.  (Tuesday Nov 24 | post #10)

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Every Human Being Spends Five Years of Life on a Toilet

You are not considering that you begin using the toilet at the average age of 3.5, thus reducing overall timespan to 66.5 years. The amount of time you spend per sitting grows with age, so you must consider an increase over time. Whether you use linear or non-linear growth is your choice. How many times do you eat Mexican or other ethnic food per month which may impact your bowel movements? Does hugging the toilet count as "on" time? If so, multiply "sittings " during university years by 6. Are you considering a male subject, or female for your calculation? But then again, who gives a flying fluck?  (Tuesday Nov 24 | post #48)

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Man kills mom after she catches him masturbating

True. But instead, it was an angry llama that caused such trauma.  (Tuesday Nov 17 | post #28)

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Microsoft: Windows 7 Inspired By Mac OS X

Great perspective and an excellent comparison Barney, I enjoyed the read. Valeu!  (Tuesday Nov 17 | post #28)

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Man kills mom after she catches him masturbating

He's no longer known as 'Spanky the Llama'. Now he's 'Spanky the Throw-Rug'.  (Tuesday Nov 17 | post #26)

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Drilling for Scotch whiskey on frozen continent

True. But you'd think that after being stuck on the vessel for a year, they would have finished the whiskey.  (Tuesday Nov 17 | post #10)

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Drilling for Scotch whiskey on frozen continent

Wow. And I thought I was an alchoholic.  (Monday Nov 16 | post #2)

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Getting perfect vaginas put women at risk

Does lightning shoot out of your ass?  (Monday Nov 16 | post #172)