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May 29, 2010

ADAM THE MACHO COASTGUARD Profile

Recent Posts

Entertainment

Did Lady Gaga go too far?

LISTEN YOU MOJONS, LADY GAGA CAME DOWN TO MY BOAT A FEW MONTHS AGO AND WE PARTIED LIKE ROCK STARS, BEFORE I SET SAIL AND WENT ABOUT MY USUAL TASK OF PROTECTING OUR GREAT NATION FROM ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS. SHE IS A VERY NICE LADY. SHE REALLY LIKED MY BOAT AND SHE GAVE ME A FREE CD AND A NICE BJ TO BOOT.  (Jun 6, 2010 | post #312)

Entertainment

Did Lady Gaga go too far?

GAGA....SOUNDS LIKE THE NOISE THAT ADAM THE MACHO LIFEGUARD MAKES WHEN HE SWALLOWS ROD'S 'MAN JUICE'.  (Jun 6, 2010 | post #285)

Miami, FL

Grove eccentric 'Sepy' was Miami's Hugh Hefner

JENNIFER ANNISTON? IS THAT YOU?  (Jun 6, 2010 | post #2)

Miami, FL

looking

I AM NOTHING LIKE THE LIFEGUARD! WHILE HE SITS IN HIS STAND JACKING OFF TO GAY PORN, I AM OUT ON THE SEAS IN MY BOAT, PROTECTING US FROM ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS AND DANGEROUS SHARKS. I HAVE ALSO BEEN ASKED TO LEAD A SPECIAL FORCES TEAM TO GO AND HELP WITH THE BP OIL SPILL.  (Jun 6, 2010 | post #9)

Miami, FL

Hundreds attended a Memorial Day service in North Miami l...

ARSES? ARE YOU BRITISH OR SOMETHING? TAKE YOUR ROTTEN TEETH BACK TO ENGLAND!  (Jun 6, 2010 | post #4)

Miami, FL

Best Type of Guard?

BILL I HAVE A LIFE AND A GREAT ONE AT THAT. I SPEND MY DAYS SAILING, PATROLLING OUR COASTLINES AND KEEPING ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS AT BAY. I HAVE EVEN BEEN ASKED TO GO HELP WITH THE BP OIL SPILL AND HEAD UP A SPECIAL FORCES UNIT TO CLEAN UP THE BLACK STUFF. SO BILL W., IT IS YOU WHO NEEDS TO GET A LIFE. YOU ARE ALMOST AS LAME AS THE LIFEGUARD!  (Jun 6, 2010 | post #11)

Miami, FL

Pastelito de Guayaba at Alicia's in Allapattah

HABLA INGLES? SPEAK ENGLISH BUFFOON, OR I WILL CALL IMMIGRACION!  (Jun 6, 2010 | post #3)

Miami, FL

for a really good time....

OOOH ROD, WHATEVER TURNS YOU ON! I'M SURE YOU MAKE THE LIFEGUARD "OARGASM " ALL THE TIME. WHICH OF YOU IS THE BITCH IN YOUR LITTLE RELATIONSHIP?  (Jun 6, 2010 | post #4)

Miami, FL

Stupidest thing Adam the Macho Lifeguard ever did ( not r...

LIFEGUARDS ARE INDEED LOSERS. DID YOU GO DOWN TO THAT IDIOT'S STAND?  (Jun 6, 2010 | post #53)

Miami, FL

Coast Guard interdicts, repatriates 28 Haitian migrants

COME DOWN TO MY BOAT ROD AND WE'LL SETTLE THIS ONCE AND FOR ALL. FIRST YOU NEED TO DEAL WITH THE LIFEGUARD. DID YOU GO TO HIS STAND?  (Jun 6, 2010 | post #16)

Miami, FL

Immigration - Miami, FL

YOU KNOW THE LIFEGUARD ONCE "DID" CHAVEZ ON ONE OF HIS MANY JAUNTS TO VENEZUELA. IT'S SAD BUT TRUE. THE LIFEGUARD IS A SICK, SICK PUPPY.  (Jun 6, 2010 | post #29)

Miami, FL

BP/Castrol boycott

NOT POSSIBLE. YOU HAVE STD'S THAT HAVE YET TO BE DISCOVERED BY MEDICAL SCIENCE. YOU'RE SO DISEASED THAT I HEARD IT WAS YOU WHO STARTED MAD COW'S DISEASE OVER IN ENGLAND.  (Jun 6, 2010 | post #7)

Miami, FL

looking

YOU ALSO HAVE A LOT OF SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES (SOME OF WHICH ARE NOT YET KNOWN TO MAN).  (Jun 3, 2010 | post #7)

Miami, FL

BP/Castrol boycott

AN STD-RIDDEN SCUZZBALL LIKE YOU CAN'T BE SO PICKY ME THINKS.  (Jun 3, 2010 | post #3)

Miami, FL

Best Type of Guard?

WHO THE HELL ARE YOU? I SAW YOU AT THE LIFEGUARD'S STAND. YOU CERTAINLY DO NOT HAVE A LONG JOHNSON (AT LEAST THAT'S WHAT THE LIFEGUARD TOLD ME).  (Jun 3, 2010 | post #8)

Q & A with ADAM THE MACHO COASTGUARD

Headline:

COASTGUARDS ROCK!

Hometown:

ANYWHERE IN SOUTH FLORIDA

Neighborhood:

THE SEA

When I'm Not on Topix:

I'M KEEPING OUR COASTLINES SAFE FROM INTRUDERS

Read My Forum Posts Because:

I SPEAK THE TRUTH

I'm Listening To:

OLD SCHOOL ROCK