Gambian men

[ROSEBUTTONS]

Ok your so right about the one the phone with cousin or sister. My boyfrien is always talking to his brother or sisters on the phone and when I ask him more questions I know it bothers him. So then I tell him wow you have a lot of family and then he tells me that those are not really his biological sisters or brothers those are his cousins...how crzy know I wonder if he's telling me the truth for all I know they can be his wife...cryz I'm so getting out of this relationship I don't want to end of getting screwed over. I'm so going to bust him in action need to access of his cell phone. On a mission. I'm going with my feeling and steppin out of this relationship he prob is using me for his citenzenship.

Go back wrote:

<quoted text>
You are on the right track. And believe me Bee we both know most Africans here in NYC do not have papers but work; most as cab drivers, jobs amongst their own people, etc. They find jobs. The Africans are excellent hustlers. Girl he can go on 116th st now and get a job, someone will hook him up thats the bull he is shooting you to marry him. Believe me when I say I know the culture and people I am all about giving people a chance until they prove me wrong and regardless of the bad expereinces I have had it only makes me wiser not bitter.
Sista K have you met his family? Talked to them? Most if they have something to hide will only bring you around their male friends and family and it they are speaking to a woman on the phone they will always tell you its a sister or cousins(They marry their cousins) and in their culture women are men are seldom friends, if they do have someone of the opposite sex they deal with its someone they want to get with or have dealt with. Have you been to Gambian. What do you know about this man. I know alot of woman so happy, with their nose in the sky and do not know the mans family, when he goes home they go without the wife..because he probably got another in Africa and if he has children believe me he has a wife, they seldom divorce. They love children and I do not hear about you two having any.
Get your head from out of the sky and visit the country, talk to the family....fake him out and tell him you are going to visit and see what he says.
To the rest. I am deeply sorry about your experience, in time they will get theirs. What I did to make my ex mad.....I did better. They hate to see you do good, especially if you broke up or divorce them or did not help them. I hear he still ask about me but thats his lost. I am happy. he got nothing out of me..He has not seen his family for 9 years and tried every excuse in the book so I would not divorce him but misery is not ME.
Women if they want to marry you , you can marry them islamically. Just go to the Masjid and marry. and to divorce its 3" I divorce you " and you are out. Do not let them give you that bull they have to marry legally. It is not your responsbility to help them. Their own women DO NOT help them, they have to come correct to even get one but we feel so sorry and willing to help. For what???? Ask yourself that.

[Bee]

@ Sister K....yes take your glove off...you are an old lady , that can't breed anymore and you say you are happily married to a gambian man?? get real lady....I am a young lady just had a baby 3 months and i am also now happily married to an American man , that is not fooling me for citizenship and that i know and visit his family and we are making babies...

We know how long it takes to get a green card...i really feel sorry for you because you are the foolish one for missing the point...it takes 3 yrs to get the american passport...thats what he is waiting for....These men are not stupid .

you feel so proud to get a husband huh? what...this is not about New York woman ...the point is that NY women are too smart for them and they are onto their games so we don't marry them...so we didn't get use....you are ...you think a gambian man going to come to america an married a 44 yr old lady as wife out of love??? lady think again...go ahead and sit in your bubble...now i see why many are leaving the big cities looking for wives in upstate ....

We are hear to educate women and make sure they are not taken advantage of....i don't know why you seem to think we are bitter or jealous? of what , you ? get real....we all have moved on but it is our duty to protect other women ( not you).....

[Go back]

Sista K wrote:

OK....*gloves coming off*...all of y'all insulting me are as ignorant as you can be...I can't continue this convo either...Someone send me intelligent women to discourse with not chickenheads...because the angry black woman, white woman, irish woman...cherokee woman, new york woman..whatever woman's syndrome has taken over in your lives. It pitiful..you spend paragraphs speaking a curse into my life out of spite and jealousy...because of what YOU went through. I am not having that. If you guys have experiences in this then you would know it does not take 5 years to get a green card.....Africans are just like anyone else...even moslems...they indulge in premarital sex...they have children out of wedlock...they have good hearts...they have bad hearts...they are people too..just like you...AND.they con dumb stupid women like you..are you stupid or what? Now so far as the green card all you have to do is apply for one fill out the paperwork properly and submit it with all applicable fees (chickenheads remember not to pay the fees...thats HIS responsibility) to the dept of homeland security...once you have gone thru a few months and a successful immigration interview...which we passed with flying colors...your done..first you get the work permit then you get the green card...Now, I see why those con men took y'all ignorant selves to lunch....At first I felt sorry for you...but since you are insulting me then I will tell it like it iz...ghetto style... You got took! Bottom line...quit hating the players, hate the game...and after that...get some game...if you all are so New York savvy...and new yorkers are so up on it then why are all of you dumb broads on here singing the blues. If you're laughing...laugh at yourselves...because mighty funny..what you are saying about me is merely mighta, woulda coulda...none of it has happened..get it...it's not a reality.....these are things you are making up in your own head to try and to drag me down to your level..because why?...it happende to YOU...not me...YOU!......I am living the life you wish you had...I am happily married...YOU'RE NOT!...sadly what happened to you HAS happened. You are a%& out. Now, who are the fools?...the ones that got took...or the one telling y'all...it aint never and thank God will never happen to me. PEACE!

You do not know anything about Muslims. Spell it right cause you are NOT ONE> and know nothing about islam my sister so before you attempt to get bold with us check yourself. I am sure without a doubt your education, pockets, home life is limited and narrow minded. K , Look at yourself I just notice the happy pic, you're BIG as hell sweetheart. We are NOT jealous of you and what you think you have. You are speaking of finding educated women to converse with, you have some in your town I am sure, speak with them..You are just going to continue to reply cause your Fat ass is offended and have nothing better to do, Get a hobby, a job, something but realize this forum is not for you

[Go back]

Please Special K, Sista K------9 or whatever you call yourself. If you are so offended and we are so beneath you , why are you on here? Most of the women on here have either had bad experiences and are venting or giving advice and support and so much you are neither the student or the teacher what is your motive for being here. IF you have so much of a great marriage you would not be on this forum once you read the comment, made your reply and did not receive what you wanted you should have moved on except continuing to reply. Common sense. Another thing. Sweetheart you are a easy read. You came on this site because you know little of the culture, there are some times about your husband you do not understand and once you did not get what you wanted , you lashed out. Okay so move on
Not all of us are bitter, you do not know us, our stories or our hearts.
I left my marriages out of selfishness-on their part. I have married 2 African, one Islamically and the other legally and know the culture, food, etc and if I am so bitter I would NOT continue to date them, but I do. My bad experiences; the little I have had, have been with black men mostly. I have dated a variety of men, as long as they are MusliM. Believe me when I say . YOU HAVE NOTHING ON ME. I have no reason to be jealous of you or any of us for that matter. The only thing I have lost in my marriages is a little time.
Seems as if you whole world is against little ( I mean BIG ASS) Sista K Please. Baby you are dealing with a real woman. I am working on my 2nd degree-free, thanks to Veterans Affairs, I serve my country well and completed 2 tours to Iraq, I have traveled places you will not, can not and unable to afford, I have my own home, car, etc. and I am jealous of you because What>> YOU HAVE FOOD IN THE FRIDGE, LOL. Sweetheart I was not raised in the Ghetto.. I was raised in Oklahoma..yes there are Blacks in Oklahoma but moved away many years ago, My parents have been married over 30 years, none of my siblings have been to jail, have drug or alcohol problems, I have a Federal Government job- we do not get laid off- and I have done things in my life that would take you a lifetime to Accomplish. You are talking to a woman with substances.
I bet no one has treated you like this man, Got you wide open. I would also bet you are overweight, have had many bad experiences with men, have a okay J O B, your own place, no children or they are older and had no intentions of having anymore? You were targeted sweetheart….
Let me continue my rant...

[Go back]

You came into this marriage. Overjoyed, blind, native and not knowing anything. I bet you know more about the characters on TV then your husbands family, culture, food, language.The offical language there is English and thy speak Wolof as well as Mandinka. But I guess you know that cause you know everything. 60% cannot read and most live in the villages. The girls are usually pulled out of school to learn how to cook, help with the family household, etc. The boys do nothings as do the men. The usually marry their own kind and will marry someone from another race but will have another wife_of their culture. You tell me your husband is in his 40 and never married, Please and only one child, Okay ..Right. They love children and if you are not planning on having children, haven't tried by now. HE WILL HAVE THEM. and Miss know it all it does take about 5 years to get a green card within 3 months he gets his work permit which he has to continue to renew and not expire. After filing there is a 6-9 month wait before the first interview if the paper work is correct, also in some cases there is a 2nd interview But they will get a temporary card dearheart and I am sure the ones that have done thru the process would know better than you and/ or a Immigration Agent, which you are not- They do not get laid off either, LOL. You are playing yourself not us, why are you on here trying to convince us , of what..that you are happy, SO what. Live your life and let others live theres, you have no right to judge and try to pick on others. But you got the right one here Ghetto Queen , The Army do not make punks and you will never get to the level I have in life..you've too old, better play caught up.
Oh To the otherS on here..read this its by Sista K from another site. Here is a comment she had on another site:
I have dated Nigerians...and the only thing negative I can say about them is they are controlling...bossy...arrogant . I have nigerian friends who are true christians...when they are true christians they are different...good men I am now married to a gambian man. I am very happy. He is a great lover...and husband.... He works hard and he takes care of me and thats all that matters. The down side is they can be self centered and theya re moslem...and the religious differences make us clash sometimes. Over all I am happy.
You really have to be Native, why would you let other know such private info about you and your husbands life.. Thats why women get their men stolen for telling things that need to be keep between you and the husband. Like I said before, He has your nose wide open. Where is he is educated, he's a good muslim...no its he is a good lover. Honey he will not convert to your religious no matter what u do. He will have other children, and wives. And while you are on here wasting time why don't you get to know the family, the culture, get a hobby or something. For a 44 yrs old you are pathetic. You know nothing about this man. Oh he will keep you for awhile, cause you seem in your own little world, come down sweetheart and get REAL. If you are happy so be it BUT LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING UNTIL YOU HAVE ACCOMPLISH THE THINGS I HAVE IN LIFE< I WILL NEVER BE JEALOUS OF YOU AND WHAT YOU HAVE, which is nothing.

[boos lady]

excuse me for butting in ,but sista k , you havnt been married with this man for long atall,he is still no doubt having something to gain from you ,im not from the bronx love , im from a small city in the uk. but i know the gambians inside out. the system , the way they operate, i dont want to get into a slagging match with you.but love, please be careful. you have already married him , so all i can say is do not invest any of your money into the gambia , because when he leaves you (and he will), you will lose more than you thought. you are not speacial darling , we all thought we were . you are just another one that fell for it. 1 years of marraige love ,come back in another 2 to 3.

[Go back]

boos lady wrote:

excuse me for butting in ,but sista k , you havnt been married with this man for long atall,he is still no doubt having something to gain from you ,im not from the bronx love , im from a small city in the uk. but i know the gambians inside out. the system , the way they operate, i dont want to get into a slagging match with you.but love, please be careful. you have already married him , so all i can say is do not invest any of your money into the gambia , because when he leaves you (and he will), you will lose more than you thought. you are not speacial darling , we all thought we were . you are just another one that fell for it. 1 years of marraige love ,come back in another 2 to 3.

Boss lady , You cannot tell her nothing. She seems to know everything. She think we are all bitter, jealous and against her for some reason. She'e not dealing with a full stack. She will find out, it'll be another 3 year but she will find out and if in all this time they have had no children , you know its not going to last. Seems to me Sista K has issues and no matter what you ,me or anyone say or what we know..she knows all. Can anyone say prenup because if you do have something and he is smart When he leaves he will try to take what you have. But Sista K you may not have to worry, you do not seem to have much...For a 44 yrs old as you put it. She thinks she is talking to a much of young, naive, uneducated women.

[Go back]

Sista K wrote:

OK....*gloves coming off*...all of y'all insulting me are as ignorant as you can be...I can't continue this convo either...Someone send me intelligent women to discourse with not chickenheads...because the angry black woman, white woman, irish woman...cherokee woman, new york woman..whatever woman's syndrome has taken over in your lives. It pitiful..you spend paragraphs speaking a curse into my life out of spite and jealousy...because of what YOU went through. I am not having that. If you guys have experiences in this then you would know it does not take 5 years to get a green card.....Africans are just like anyone else...even moslems...they indulge in premarital sex...they have children out of wedlock...they have good hearts...they have bad hearts...they are people too..just like you...AND.they con dumb stupid women like you..are you stupid or what? Now so far as the green card all you have to do is apply for one fill out the paperwork properly and submit it with all applicable fees (chickenheads remember not to pay the fees...thats HIS responsibility) to the dept of homeland security...once you have gone thru a few months and a successful immigration interview...which we passed with flying colors...your done..first you get the work permit then you get the green card...Now, I see why those con men took y'all ignorant selves to lunch....At first I felt sorry for you...but since you are insulting me then I will tell it like it iz...ghetto style... You got took! Bottom line...quit hating the players, hate the game...and after that...get some game...if you all are so New York savvy...and new yorkers are so up on it then why are all of you dumb broads on here singing the blues. If you're laughing...laugh at yourselves...because mighty funny..what you are saying about me is merely mighta, woulda coulda...none of it has happened..get it...it's not a reality.....these are things you are making up in your own head to try and to drag me down to your level..because why?...it happende to YOU...not me...YOU!......I am living the life you wish you had...I am happily married...YOU'RE NOT!...sadly what happened to you HAS happened. You are a%& out. Now, who are the fools?...the ones that got took...or the one telling y'all...it aint never and thank God will never happen to me. PEACE!

Gloves coming off, LMAO Miss Ghetto Queen, LMAO please sweetheart, Really. AS I stated before ...The army DO NOT MAKE PUNKS. you take that ghetto mentality and fat ass and attempt to scare the ones in your town, not here.

[bee]

@ Go back....Girl i couldn't word it better...you hit all the points....She is unaware of the culture...the fact that he have a kid back there , he have a wife,,they very rarely have baby momma,...its looked down upon, and most likely he has more than one kid , that is why he was travelling , as she said back and forth from spain...even if he has one , he will soon be travelling back and forth and make more...even if they marry a foreigner , they must marry their own and usually very early because they want the first wife to be their own kind..... there is one younger guy i know here who didn't marry before he left and he is the only one who refuse to marry for paper , I have always wondered why he was the only one who wasn't looking to marry American for paper when all his friends are married and i was told it was because he wasn't married home and his first wife have to be his own kind...so he is here just hustling and not interested in marriage...

[Sista K]

honestly I am of the opinion that all of you are delusional..because guess what?...your failure happened to you...not me. The failures you speak of happened to others...not me. You don't know me nor hold the key to my future. You are not God. sooooo....Haters keep up the good work...the more you try and bring down a blessing the more God will lift up me and women like me who see married life to a good Gambian man as a wonderful thing. I hope someone seeking who reads this doesn't lose hope despite all your negativity. Once again Peace!

[Sista K]

@ Goback...nothing you possess or achieve can hide the bitter, shallow and worthless way you feel every night you lay down in your empty, loveless bed. I am sorry, but its evident in every hate filled sentence you write about me.@ Bee I am so sad that you feel you have to ride on the coat tails of an individual like Go back...when its obvious you are just hurting from what happened to you. But if it makes you feel better...attack me.. for what?...what?...for having a life that is contrary to all your jaded speculations?..For daring to say I found a good Gambian man?..I mean how much sense does that make? Bottom line, Sista K is happy....be happy for me sistas! Can I get a single...well, maybe your life is the exception sister despite what we have experienced. But I guess you rather live my life for me since its so obvious to you that I have no idea what I am talking about...lol There is no way Sista K could know that she is happy and content in her marriage.This whole thing is becoming a dramatic comedy that I am finding very entertaining...honestly, that's why I keep coming back...

[boos lady]

sista k, your gambian gonna be gone love ,as soon as he doesnt need you for anything anymore , in the few months before he leaves you he will start to act very diffrently towards you , he will stress you, argue with you , annoy you. he will do things like running up your bills, eg phone bills etc . by doin this it will reduce the love you have for him and better still for him you may even ask HIM to leave.this is what they do most of the time to get out of there marraiges to western women.if you were to come home one day and he was gone maybe you would not handle it.thats what they do love . i feel sorry for you because you are in this marraige already, so you just gonna find out for yourself babe

[Zahra]

Sista K wrote:

@ Goback...nothing you possess or achieve can hide the bitter, shallow and worthless way you feel every night you lay down in your empty, loveless bed. I am sorry, but its evident in every hate filled sentence you write about me.@ Bee I am so sad that you feel you have to ride on the coat tails of an individual like Go back...when its obvious you are just hurting from what happened to you. But if it makes you feel better...attack me.. for what?...what?...for having a life that is contrary to all your jaded speculations?..For daring to say I found a good Gambian man?..I mean how much sense does that make? Bottom line, Sista K is happy....be happy for me sistas! Can I get a single...well, maybe your life is the exception sister despite what we have experienced. But I guess you rather live my life for me since its so obvious to you that I have no idea what I am talking about...lol There is no way Sista K could know that she is happy and content in her marriage.This whole thing is becoming a dramatic comedy that I am finding very entertaining...honestly, that's why I keep coming back...

Reading all these posts and how it has become a slanging match mostly between Sister K and Go Back, it's a shame that it's got so personal, like calling people big and fat etc... we can all give advice and try to help our sisters not make mistakes but we all make choices and if people are happy then let it be.... life is too short for all this bitching amongst ourselves when we should be kind and supportive...... nobody can make other people's mistakes and we all learn, however long it takes but personal insults on both sides from intelligent women just breeds negativity so peace out, ladies, please

[Go back]

Sista K first of all let me truly apologize for the name calling, indecent and hurtful statements. Zahra you are right and it is childless and it does not resolve anything.
Sista K seriously, this will be my last time addressing you. But lets clear our mind for a minute okay. If I came on this site looking for answers about the culture, as you stated and saw what others had to say, I would move on; but you did not so lets address that. While reading you could plainly see the women on here are hurt, bitter, telling their experiences and giving advice, Right. we agree on that. Okay...you are not giving advice , have any experiences, do not know the culture, So once you made your statement that your marriage was different and did not get the respond you wanted, the advice you wanted about the culture(which was the reason you stated you were on here), Why not move along, why start to critize. First you target the whites and once we pointed out we felt you were racist, you started on the sisters, now the rest..you are all over the place. Now the new things is...We are jealous, of what dear. We do not know you, your life or your story. Thats my problems with you. Your dishonesty, I feel you are on here on some different stuff, some motive and you are not using common sense or being reasonable.If I am wrong , I apologize now but Why!!!! continue to get caught up with the drama, having to convince or defend yourself about your marriage; Which one is it? Only you know yourself and your situation and marriage , so why are you on here arguing, agressively defending your marriage, if its good, theres nothing to defend then; correct. We do not know u but thru your words. But it makes sense to continue on here which tells me you have a motive or not being honest or just like drama or have nothing to do. If you were truly a reasonable person you would have started a forum of your own, Simple....you can start one at marriagepartner.com ...google it. You seem to like drama and make things hard for yourself.
Another thing cause you seem to think you know me and the others. I choose to sleep alone and women like you do not understand that just because you are alone DO NOT mean you are lonely. I first married Africans in my mid-late 30's so i had a life, a home, travel, a career and continue that thru out my marriage,as I stated before I divorce because of selfishness and only lost time from either of my marriages. I kept my home, kept my career, my banking accounts as well as my name. So where did the bitterness come in K..you know me. I have never dated a Gambian man until now and is dating a Gambian and Senegalese. If I am so bitter sweetheart , why would I continue to date Africans...I am far from ugly. Its my preference. My last husband was Senegalese so if I was so Bitter do you think I would be dating them? You need you pay attention before you speak of things you know nothing about. I do not expect anything from them, I know what to look for, I know the culture and if does not work out so what ..I am content for now.
Bee know about the culture as I do , so before u attempt to think- or not that someone is riding on someone coat tails sweetheart she was in a relationship with one not me,I am just dating..I just know the culture. You cannot walk in NYC a block without seeing, bumping into an African.

[anonomous]

Is money the root of all evil or men? Its 1 of them!!!! lol

[Go back]

Please read the comments before you answer. We have no reason to be jealous of you. I would NOT trade lives with you even on one of my worst days; believe me when I stay I am happy. Its a southern thing, I understand but we ALL do not need a man to be happy. I am happy with and love my job, I love the freedom to travel, to come home and not cook, clean for someone. If I do not want to I do not have to. Its my choice and the way I chose to live my life. If these women are bitter and hurt, so what K, this is not a debate, competition.They have the right to be. Yes some made some damn terrible decisions and others did not know the culture and men and others regardless of what they did got scam. Nothing is guareented or perfect.
Just be honest with yourself and us...and resonable, if you cannot find what you need here, why stress yourself debating with me or others..move on and what puzzles me is. Why not ask your husband the questions you need to ask about his culture I do with my dates and friends???????
It really hurt and angers me to see that people are dishonest and have the nerve to critize those in pain. All they told u in the beginning was be careful and told u their experience, whereas you went off..You could have chosen to take it or leave it. Not talk so bad about them...you like to kick a dog when its down and wounded...I understand you got mad cause they felt you would be hurt, wanted you to be careful, etc...shake that off. Why get mad at someone trying to help you and if your situation is different say so but to tell them they were native, stupid, etc. GET THIS K THEY WERE HURT>>>YOU WERE NOT!!! Get over the BS that they say its not to hurt you , put you done, break up your marriage. Be the bigger person and empathic with them and show Sympathy is that so hard???? IS IT

[No Name]

bee wrote:

@ Go back....Girl i couldn't word it better...you hit all the points....She is unaware of the culture...the fact that he have a kid back there , he have a wife,,they very rarely have baby momma,...its looked down upon, and most likely he has more than one kid , that is why he was travelling , as she said back and forth from spain...even if he has one , he will soon be travelling back and forth and make more...even if they marry a foreigner , they must marry their own and usually very early because they want the first wife to be their own kind..... there is one younger guy i know here who didn't marry before he left and he is the only one who refuse to marry for paper , I have always wondered why he was the only one who wasn't looking to marry American for paper when all his friends are married and i was told it was because he wasn't married home and his first wife have to be his own kind...so he is here just hustling and not interested in marriage...

Hey Bee,
My guess is that her husband is a SARAHULE man with three or four wives at home.I hope I am wrong but this is likelier to be the case than not.

[Go back]

anonomous wrote:

Is money the root of all evil or men? Its 1 of them!!!! lol

its still MONEY!!!! a close 2nd is men.

[Sista K]

@ Goback...the thing of the matter is when I came here seeking a few answers not all. All I heard was bitterness and contempt for my choice to love and stay married to a good man in response. I did my very best to ignore the obvious. You can't judge a whole country of men for the actions of a few. If you are intelligent as you say, I think you would know that. I do admit I have prejudice in me. But I will be the first to admit it. Most people hide it and pretend that they don't have it. But behind your back, they will speak their ugliness among those who espouse their beliefs. But I'd rather be honest than not at this juncture..but oh well as you said we neither of us know each other, but after a while, the angy woman tirades get old and I have every right to point that out. When does a person take responsiblility for their own life and their own happiness and not leave it in the hands of others to build up or destroy. Anyways about Gambia, I do know some about the culture and what I don't know I am learning.. I am now learning a bit more about it from a wonderful website run by a really cool British lady who is happily married to a Gambian man. Yes to your utter dismay, there are more of us...lol. She spoke to me privately and allowed me to join over there. The thing is they allow people to be happy over there. I am reading alot of info right now. I know we all cant be happy all the time. But if you are going to criticize what I love...which is a beautiful Gambian man. I have every right to respond back. This is a free website and there is as far as I can ascertain no censorhip here. If I don't like what you have to say I an either ignore it or respond. I chose to respond and so did you. However, I never called you out of your name as you did me which to me shows that you are a not the learned person that you say you are. In my eyes, that makes you just as awful an individual as the men you say go out and deceive these poor women... Hatred and ugliness...is hatred and ugliness. And even you admit...you showed alot of that here. To the ladies who are hurting...I apologize if I offended you callously. However, I do not apologize for defending the character of the Gambian man in general excepting all conmen and cheats. I am married to a very good one and I will love him as long as my God sees fit that we be together which I believe, however naive it may sound will be until by death, we part. Peace once again.

[bee]

@ sister K... u are a delusional lady...one day very soon you will see. the fact that your husbaqnd have a kid , he has a wife guaranteed... You don't know his language, he calls back home and speak to them and the wife while you are there...anothere thing the women do is tell the kids to ask the dad when are you coming home....you know nothing about gambians.... How many of his family in the US have you met? these people are big on family and if you haven't met them , they don't care to know you because they know this is just a temporary situation...
..
Go back was just trying to help you out. Trust me he will never take you to the gambia...he might promise to in the beginning but trust me you wont..do the research, how many black american women you know that have gone there? ticket to africa cost around 1500-2000. yet they go every year, who would do that if it is not to visit their wives and continue to procreate...this is a fact, this is not just me blabing , this is what gambian men live for, to get the paper and travel back often to visit the wife & continue to procreate.....anyway, to each is own...continue to believe that you are different or special (duhhh)