hi

Odense, Denmark

#1 Mar 24, 2013
Hi
I love/ havd a crush on somali guy at my College. We haven't talked to each other coz what should I say to him? I am a somali girl myself and Im very shy to especially talk to somali guy, and I really don't know why? Maybe becoz it feel like we are close. But this guy is what I call HOT. I don't have somali friends at my college, and these I have outside my school we don't connected as good as we did once.
I only have some ajanib friends from Turkey. What should I do? Give up?

And IF we become friends should I tell him I love him or ignore my feelings when I'm afraid it may ruins the friendship?

“Safar Dheer iyo”

Since: Jan 11

Sahay Gaaban

#2 Mar 24, 2013
I think it's a natural thing for a girl to feel shy when she has some sort of feeling for a guy. This is especially true to Somali girls and you may be a good example of this. I've also seen some other Somali girls who have gone through the same situation. Whenever a Somali feels for a Somali guy, she starts to feel shy for some reason and I guess that is because she thinks that if she is rejected by the Somali guy he'll tell what he did to her to his other friends. It's usually this kinds of feelings that discourage Somali girls to make a move. I may be wrong here though but that is just how I see it.

Anyway, I think what you should do here is try to talk to the guy and initiate and exchange Sallaams with him. Start with a normal introduction; like when you see him, just "Sallaamu Caleykum". This is what two Muslims say to each other when they meet @ school, on a street and so on, and he won't know or have doubt whether u have a feeling for him. When u say that, just pass. If he starts to talk more, see, stop and listen, which may be a greet thing. Then the following days may be normal and it may be easy for you to get know more about him.

Finally, you need to be very cautious some not so good consequence this may have. Just try to know the guy if he is a good Muslim. IF he is Ciyaalka xaafadda, I would encourage you forget about him because Ciyaalla Suuq can ruin your future. So know the difference between a gentleman and Ciyaalka.

Good luck.

“Somali? of course.”

Since: Mar 13

Location hidden

#3 Mar 24, 2013
Contact him via his family.
hi

VanlÝse, Denmark

#4 Mar 24, 2013
kgiama wrote:
I think it's a natural thing for a girl to feel shy when she has some sort of feeling for a guy. This is especially true to Somali girls and you may be a good example of this. I've also seen some other Somali girls who have gone through the same situation. Whenever a Somali feels for a Somali guy, she starts to feel shy for some reason and I guess that is because she thinks that if she is rejected by the Somali guy he'll tell what he did to her to his other friends. It's usually this kinds of feelings that discourage Somali girls to make a move. I may be wrong here though but that is just how I see it.

Anyway, I think what you should do here is try to talk to the guy and initiate and exchange Sallaams with him. Start with a normal introduction; like when you see him, just "Sallaamu Caleykum". This is what two Muslims say to each other when they meet @ school, on a street and so on, and he won't know or have doubt whether u have a feeling for him. When u say that, just pass. If he starts to talk more, see, stop and listen, which may be a greet thing. Then the following days may be normal and it may be easy for you to get know more about him.

Finally, you need to be very cautious some not so good consequence this may have. Just try to know the guy if he is a good Muslim. IF he is Ciyaalka xaafadda, I would encourage you forget about him because Ciyaalla Suuq can ruin your future. So know the difference between a gentleman and Ciyaalka.

Good luck.
Thx, for the advise! But can I say Salam to him when I didn't said a word to him in about over 7 month? U are right that right that I'm afraid that some of my behavior can be understand wrong. This guy isn't in the suruq I think. He seems to be a guy that studies all the time and he prays in the school too. But by saying salama calykum now after we have been studied in over 7 month is a good idea but im afraid that he or maybe his friends would think I'm cheap. I have tried to ignore them coz I wouldn't look cheap in their eyes but I don't know now;-(
hi

VanlÝse, Denmark

#5 Mar 24, 2013
Ancient Prince wrote:
Contact him via his family.
They don't live in the same city as me, but why do that if I don't even know him?

“Safar Dheer iyo”

Since: Jan 11

Sahay Gaaban

#6 Mar 24, 2013
hi wrote:
<quoted text>
Thx, for the advise! But can I say Salam to him when I didn't said a word to him in about over 7 month? U are right that right that I'm afraid that some of my behavior can be understand wrong. This guy isn't in the suruq I think. He seems to be a guy that studies all the time and he prays in the school too. But by saying salama calykum now after we have been studied in over 7 month is a good idea but im afraid that he or maybe his friends would think I'm cheap. I have tried to ignore them coz I wouldn't look cheap in their eyes but I don't know now;-(
You've been seeing the guy for 7 months and never say hi to him? Have u also had this feeling towards him for all these 7 months or it's a new feeling? Are you still in the same class with him? Anyways, I think it's not too late to start a new journey. Just initiate the move and see what he says or how it goes. By saying Sallaam to the guy doesn't mean you are a cheap or he or his friends would see you that way. This is not even gonna change the fact that you're not a cheap girl. I think you should ignore this kind of feelings in order to accomplish your mission towards the guy. Remember the first step on approaching the guy is nothing more than an experiment. If the test results of this test come with some appealing fruits then that is a good sign for you to continue about knowing the guy even further or forming a bright relationship with him. If, however, the experiment fails then cut it off and forget about him. That are the two things you should consider.
hi

VanlÝse, Denmark

#7 Mar 24, 2013
kgiama wrote:
<quoted text>You've been seeing the guy for 7 months and never say hi to him? Have u also had this feeling towards him for all these 7 months or it's a new feeling? Are you still in the same class with him? Anyways, I think it's not too late to start a new journey. Just initiate the move and see what he says or how it goes. By saying Sallaam to the guy doesn't mean you are a cheap or he or his friends would see you that way. This is not even gonna change the fact that you're not a cheap girl. I think you should ignore this kind of feelings in order to accomplish your mission towards the guy. Remember the first step on approaching the guy is nothing more than an experiment. If the test results of this test come with some appealing fruits then that is a good sign for you to continue about knowing the guy even further or forming a bright relationship with him. If, however, the experiment fails then cut it off and forget about him. That are the two things you should consider.
I see. And the answer to your three questions is YES. I can understand it myself

“Safar Dheer iyo”

Since: Jan 11

Sahay Gaaban

#8 Mar 24, 2013
hi wrote:
<quoted text>
I see. And the answer to your three questions is YES. I can understand it myself
Wow that has been quit some time. You remind me of the Somali adage that says, "Qof aad maalin ku bareydo; weligaa ma baratid". Hope thing go the way you want them to be. I know you want khayr & wanaag out of this. Also, I say before do anything, pray Salah Istikhaarah and make dua. If this is good for you in the future, I'm sure things will be easy for u otherwise the first experiment u conduct will fail and that will be a sign for u to stay away from the guy.
hi

VanlÝse, Denmark

#9 Mar 24, 2013
kgiama wrote:
<quoted text>Wow that has been quit some time. You remind me of the Somali adage that says, "Qof aad maalin ku bareydo; weligaa ma baratid". Hope thing go the way you want them to be. I know you want khayr & wanaag out of this. Also, I say before do anything, pray Salah Istikhaarah and make dua. If this is good for you in the future, I'm sure things will be easy for u otherwise the first experiment u conduct will fail and that will be a sign for u to stay away from the guy.
Thx and insha Allah!

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