Why Good Manners Are Important In Islam?

Posted in the Somalia Forum

First Prev
of 2
Next Last

“Safar Dheer iyo”

Since: Jan 11

Sahay Gaaban

#1 Jun 10, 2013
First let's see what did the Quran and the Prophet say about Akhlaaq (manners):

The Prophet Mohammad (peace be upon him), in Muwatta Imam Malik said: "Verily, I was sent for no other reason,except to perfect the noble traits of character''- in other words; one of the Prophet's goals, in fact, the primary mission was the perfection of how people behave - their manners.

A Muslim can't be a true Muslim if he does his Ibadaat (worshiping, i.e prayers, fasts, zakat..etc)very well but neglects an important side of his worship i.e Akhlaaq. In other words, he who prays his daily prayers in mosques well, but when it comes to dealing with people in his daily life he is the worst person, cannot be considered a true Muslim. This is true of people who backbite, spreading hate and evil among people, treat those who are under his care (family, employees…etc) cruelly and lie. Yet people who are like this are still proud of themselves and think that they are guaranteed a place in Jannah because of their prayers?

The connection between Iman and manners is very strong as the Prophet peace be upon him said that faith consists of seventy branches, the least of which is the removal of a tree branch blocking the road, and in another narration, sixty branches, and Hayaa'(which is an Arabic term, which is hard to translate and covers manners,modesty, guarding of chastity, etc) is a part of faith. So again, manners and behavior are linked directly to Iman.

The Prophet sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam said: "The best Mu'mins(believers) are those who are best in their akhlaaq, those whose shoulders' are trodden over."

The Prophet peace be upon him said: "Those of you who will be closest to me on the Day of Judgment will be those who have the best akhlaaq."

Is there any better blessing than being close to the Prophet in the day of judgment?

From Protected Pearls

More to come, Insha Allah

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#2 Jun 11, 2013
Mashallah, very true.
With in the somali community, this is a very big problem. I think it is the number one problem. We have a lot of ilm(knowledge) and strong aqeedah but we really lack on Akhlaaq.
Majority of the problems in the somali community is do to the lack of akhlaaq. Problems such as free mixing, disobedience and disrespect to parents, disrespect to teachers, fighting, etc.
Our lack of akhlaaq also effects many of our relationships. Such as the relationship between a husband and wife and the others I mentioned above.

“Safar Dheer iyo”

Since: Jan 11

Sahay Gaaban

#3 Jun 11, 2013
peace n shaax123 wrote:
Mashallah, very true.
With in the somali community, this is a very big problem. I think it is the number one problem. We have a lot of ilm(knowledge) and strong aqeedah but we really lack on Akhlaaq.
Majority of the problems in the somali community is do to the lack of akhlaaq. Problems such as free mixing, disobedience and disrespect to parents, disrespect to teachers, fighting, etc.
Our lack of akhlaaq also effects many of our relationships. Such as the relationship between a husband and wife and the others I mentioned above.
I do agree with what you've said about our Somali community. Akhlaaq used to be something we used to study in school as well as in Quranic Dugsi. I remember one of my Macallin Quran (RA) used to teach use to be respectful to each other, to our parents, to our teachers and to our neighbor and community. However, since Somalis have scattered around the world of Dagaalkii ahliga ahaa, we seem to have lost a lot. And the biggest thing that is fading away within the our community, like you said, is the importance of Akhlaaq, which is another indispensable ingredient of life. I hope our community every recognize this before it's too late. I think what we need is something called "Wacyi Gellin", and this could be done through the Somali media such as Idaacaddaha, Wargeysyada iyo aalladdaha maqalka.

“Safar Dheer iyo”

Since: Jan 11

Sahay Gaaban

#4 Jun 11, 2013
Now lets see how and where the good manners are demanded

IN THE AREA OF FAMILY, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: The best of you is the best of you to his family, and I am the best to his family.

IN THE AREA OF neighbors, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: The angel Gabriel kept advising me about neighbors until I thought he would make him entitled to some part of the inheritance.

IN SPEECH, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: Nothing is weightier on the scales of the day of judgment than his good behavior.Allah treats a person who is given to loose and vulgar talk with displeasure. With regards to backbiting,the Allah said: And do not backbite, would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother; you would surely hate it (so you should likewise hate backbiting)[Al Quran 49:12].

With regards to parents, Allah said: say not even a word to them in contempt and don't repel them [Al Quran 17:23].

In controlling one's temper, the Prophet (peace be upon him) says: The strong man is not the good wrestler, but the strong man is he who controls himself when he is angry.

With regards to being for giving and kind, the Prophet (peace be upon him), said to one of the Sahabah:``You have two qualities which Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta'alaa) likes and loves: one is mildness and the other is toleration''.

Ahklaaq in giving Dawah:

You might believe this or not! But good manners are the best form of Dawah. If we ask ourselves, what if a person was walking around calling people to Islam and to worship the one true God yet he have no manners at all, will anyone follow him? Or even listen tohim? The answer must be No, for sure.
No one will be willing to follow the same way of life that such a person (above) follows. Even if he was so eloquent in his speech and no matter how nicely he described Islam as the best religion on the face of earth, his actions, speech,and beliefs are opposing hence no one will listen to him.People tend to believe the actions more than the speech and that is the nature of human as actions speak louder than words. We need to remind ourselves that Islam was spread -during its early stages- in many countries like India and the far east of Asia through the Arab Muslim merchants who were showing the best of manners -especially in trade- to people of those countries. Their honesty and actions were so admired by people of those countries that they embraced Islam.

You can't walk around preaching people to embrace the religion of honesty when you are not honest! You can't advise people about morality in Islam when you don’t follow any morals! No one will believe what you are saying because simply you are not making any sense to them!

Another example of this is the story of the Jew who was a neighbor of the Prophet (peace be upon him) who used to dump rubbish on his doorstep. One day, the Prophet found no rubbish. The next day he found no rubbish, so he asked about the Jew, only to find that he was sick. He then visited the sick Jew and tried to make him feel better. As a result, the Jew became Muslim.

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#5 Jun 12, 2013
Mashallah, true.
You mentioned the media as a way ti reintroduce people to akhlaaq. You also mentioned dugsi. I think dugsi is an excellent way of teaching kids akhlaaq.
Also, we have social media. Twitter, Facebook, Tumbler, topic, ect. I think it's a good way to reintroduce the importance of akhlaaq to youth.

As for the adults, somali channels and masjids are a good way to reintroduce akhlaaq to them.
Now the only question left is how are we going to do this?

“Safar Dheer iyo”

Since: Jan 11

Sahay Gaaban

#6 Jun 13, 2013
peace n shaax123 wrote:
Mashallah, true.
You mentioned the media as a way ti reintroduce people to akhlaaq. You also mentioned dugsi. I think dugsi is an excellent way of teaching kids akhlaaq.
Also, we have social media. Twitter, Facebook, Tumbler, topic, ect. I think it's a good way to reintroduce the importance of akhlaaq to youth.
As for the adults, somali channels and masjids are a good way to reintroduce akhlaaq to them.
Now the only question left is how are we going to do this?
I'm not expert on this subject. I'm a learner myself. That is a good question; however, which I think, we need to get an answer. May be we don't need just an answer but we need a suitable answer that comes with at least a beneficial action. Like I said, Warbaahinta Somalida is a good way to start with but then we need to get a qualified people to do the job because constructing the fundamental pillars of Akhlaaq is not easy an job. Since (or it seems so) most of our people are visual learners or learn something through watching and listening, we may also need to create more riwaayaads and short films emphasizing and dealing with the Good Akhlaaqiyaad.

I think we're completely short when to comes to short Somali movies that deal with this particular issue. Most of the so-called movies or riwaayads (if any) that we produce today are only about xirriir caashaq iyo jacayl gaaban, and yet the amount of divorce in our community is staggering. This is especially true among the young generation who are mistreating each other like there is no tomorrow. The reason for this, I believe, is that most of the young generation of today have lost or were not even brought up with an iota of Akhlaaq and that is why we have a tremendous number of Somalis with no Aaddaab and Dhaqan in Qurbaha. So it's imperative to get influential people who are also persistent, dedicated and willing to tackle the job of disseminating the wanaag of good Aaddaab.

The best place to start the job of (teaching) Good Manners, before any where else, I think is non other than in every Somali home, at Dugsi Quran, all the way to Warbaahinta Muuqaalka ah (iyo tan Maqalka ahba). Every Hooyo and Aabbe should teach their children how to deal people with respect. When to joke and when not to joke. To whom they can play with and whom they can't. How to behave be respectful when there're guests at the house. How to respect and talk to people like aunts, uncles, awoowe and ayeeyo. Whom they need to befriend with and whom are not suppose to hang with and so forth. Every one of this needs time and patience but it also needs dedication with consistence action.

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#7 Jun 13, 2013
you are absolutely right.
But I want to see action and start now. The longer we wait, the worse it gets.

“Safar Dheer iyo”

Since: Jan 11

Sahay Gaaban

#8 Jun 13, 2013
I think sacrifice comes before action. Do we even have people who are willing to sacrifice to make a difference? Like they said, "talk is cheap". Most of the time action is a hard thing to attain because few are the people of action especially in our community. We know how to talk. We're all experts, and masters of Hadal even in our literature like Gabay. If we were a people with a sense of action, we would have achieve a lot; really a lot. Sort out our 2 decades old problems and be something by now. We have yet mastered the art of attaining fruitful action. So, I'm afraid, your expectation to see an action happen right here and now is somewhat impossible to take place right way. The way I see it, we don't have much options here other than to wait and see. But you know what one idea from one individual can change a nation. Therefore, may be we can start what we're preaching here within our own community so that sacrifice and action can then follow. What do you think?

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#9 Jun 13, 2013
I agree 100%. You are like super smart. Mashallah.
Perhaps the first step to action is open discussions with our peers.

“Safar Dheer iyo”

Since: Jan 11

Sahay Gaaban

#10 Jun 13, 2013
TURNING AWAY FROM THE FAULTS AND SHORTCOMINGS OF OTHERS

By Amjad Rafiq

In the Khutbah a couple of weeks ago the brother talked about the importance of manners. He mentioned many hadeeths stressing the excellence of having good manners, the very high status they give in the sight of Allah to the one who possesses them and how the one who possesses them reaches the level of the prophets and the martyrs and how even some of the Prophets and martyrs will envy such people.

And this is not surprising as the Prophet (saws) is authentically reported to have said “Indeed I was sent in order to complete/perfect the righteous manners or characteristics”. In another narration the Prophet (saws) said “Indeed I was sent to complete/perfect the noble manners/qualities”.

So the Messenger (saws) has linked the whole of his message to the perfection of peoples manners. The whole deen, the religion of Islaam has been linked to the completion of peoples manners. And in another hadeeth the Prophet (saws) said “The Deen is dealing with other people”. Everyone of us needs to interact with other people in order to get by and to survive from day to day. Otherwise life would be very difficult.

So Allaah and His Messenger, the Qur’aan and the Sunnah, enjoin and call to everything which nurtures and brings about the best characteristics, manners and qualities. This so that peoples everyday living is facilitated, made easy, enjoyable so that good feelings are made to develop and toleration of each other increases.(48:29)

There is one characteristic which if it exists within the Muslims then the society will have a support, a backbone and so it will continue to exist and which if it is removed then it will crumble, fall and hatred, envy, ill-feeling and dissension (divisions) will arise. This quality is BEING TOLERANT OF THE FAULTS OF THE PEOPLE or TURNING AWAY FROM THEIR FAULTS. To understand this quality so that we can practically bring it about and gain some benefit from it we can look at it from four aspects.

ONE: The first point is that there does not exist on this earth any person who is complete and perfect in every single respect and is free from defects. The Prophet (saws) said “Indeed people are like camels, out of a hundred you will hardly find a single one suitable to ride.” So this is clear indication from the Prophet (saws) that completeness is something very rare. If we have a hundred people and tried to select one of them for a particular task say leadership or giving a religious verdict then we would hardly find any one who would perform it in the most complete way.

The Prophet (saws) also said “Let not a believing man hate a believing woman, if he dislikes one quality in her then he will be pleased with another.” So in this hadeeth is a very important realization. That there is no Muslim who is completely wicked and evil and there is no muslim who is perfect. In fact every one of us has some good characteristics even if they are scarce and every one of us has some bad or evil characteristics even if they only small in number.

And a poet he said in a couple of lines:“And who is that person with whose every single quality/inherent characteristic you are pleased with?”(where is that person? can you find one?)

It is enough to make a man noble that his defects can be counted/listed.(the fact that a persons shortcomings can actually be listed shows his excellence) You wish that he should be perfect without any fault.(How many times do we say regarding our Muslim brother “Oh why is he like that? Can’t he be like this? Why doesn’t he do it this way?)

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#11 Jun 18, 2013
This is a good lecture about manners by sh. Mufti menk.

“turn back the hands of time”

Since: Apr 10

Location hidden

#12 Jun 18, 2013
"Good Manners" are important everywhere and to everyone. The problem with Somalis and many other religious zealots is the Belief that good manners can only come from religion.It´s actually the opposite that´s true:

An areligious/non-believing person can do any good dead that a believing person can do. However, when doing crazy things like stoning a rape victim or killing someone for having a different religion: THAT takes religion. That is a fact and no amount of akhlaaq can change that.

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#13 Jun 18, 2013
INSEARCH_OF wrote:
"Good Manners" are important everywhere and to everyone. The problem with Somalis and many other religious zealots is the Belief that good manners can only come from religion.It´s actually the opposite that´s true:
An areligious/non-believing person can do any good dead that a believing person can do. However, when doing crazy things like stoning a rape victim or killing someone for having a different religion: THAT takes religion. That is a fact and no amount of akhlaaq can change that.

I agree with the part about non Muslims having akhlaaq too. They can also have bad akhlaaq just like sonera Muslims. We are talking about how the somali community lacks akhlaaq. Do you agree?
Also, do you believe all evil stems from religion? Or that secular societies have no social issues? Or that non Muslims don't do injustices!

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#14 Jun 18, 2013
peace n shaax123 wrote:
This is a good lecture about manners by sh. Mufti menk.
I totally forgot about the link to the video. Here it is

&fe ature=youtube_gdata_player
thehassanabdi

UK

#15 Jun 18, 2013
peace n shaax123 wrote:
<quoted text>
I agree with the part about non Muslims having akhlaaq too. They can also have bad akhlaaq just like sonera Muslims. We are talking about how the somali community lacks akhlaaq. Do you agree?
Also, do you believe all evil stems from religion? Or that secular societies have no social issues? Or that non Muslims don't do injustices!
We are talking about how the somali community lacks akhlaaq. Do you agree?

PIG VOODOO aka insearechof etc, the somalis are 100% Muslims, can you give us an example of how we lack Akhlaaq? Secondly , why is your ass talking to yourself? also why are you disguised as a Muslim? Get your stinking piggy ass away from us you bastard, You ain't fooling anyone here!
thehassanabdi

UK

#16 Jun 18, 2013
INSEARCH_OF wrote:
"Good Manners" are important everywhere and to everyone. The problem with Somalis and many other religious zealots is the Belief that good manners can only come from religion.It´s actually the opposite that´s true:
An areligious/non-believing person can do any good dead that a believing person can do. However, when doing crazy things like stoning a rape victim or killing someone for having a different religion: THAT takes religion. That is a fact and no amount of akhlaaq can change that.
. The problem with Somalis and many other religious zealots is the Belief that good manners can only come from religion.It´s actually the opposite that´s true:

PIG VOODOO aka PEACE % SHAAX etc, Let me reaffirm, Good manners ONLY come from religion. What do you mean by saying the opposite is true? Are you calling your disgusting homosexuality behaviour good manners? Keep dreaming bitch, and stop talking to your own rotten ass bastardo!
thehassanabdi

UK

#17 Jun 18, 2013
kgiama wrote:
Now lets see how and where the good manners are demanded
IN THE AREA OF FAMILY, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: The best of you is the best of you to his family, and I am the best to his family.
IN THE AREA OF neighbors, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: The angel Gabriel kept advising me about neighbors until I thought he would make him entitled to some part of the inheritance.
IN SPEECH, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: Nothing is weightier on the scales of the day of judgment than his good behavior.Allah treats a person who is given to loose and vulgar talk with displeasure. With regards to backbiting,the Allah said: And do not backbite, would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother; you would surely hate it (so you should likewise hate backbiting)[Al Quran 49:12].
With regards to parents, Allah said: say not even a word to them in contempt and don't repel them [Al Quran 17:23].
In controlling one's temper, the Prophet (peace be upon him) says: The strong man is not the good wrestler, but the strong man is he who controls himself when he is angry.
With regards to being for giving and kind, the Prophet (peace be upon him), said to one of the Sahabah:``You have two qualities which Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta'alaa) likes and loves: one is mildness and the other is toleration''.
Ahklaaq in giving Dawah:
You might believe this or not! But good manners are the best form of Dawah. If we ask ourselves, what if a person was walking around calling people to Islam and to worship the one true God yet he have no manners at all, will anyone follow him? Or even listen tohim? The answer must be No, for sure.
No one will be willing to follow the same way of life that such a person (above) follows. Even if he was so eloquent in his speech and no matter how nicely he described Islam as the best religion on the face of earth, his actions, speech,and beliefs are opposing hence no one will listen to him.People tend to believe the actions more than the speech and that is the nature of human as actions speak louder than words. We need to remind ourselves that Islam was spread -during its early stages- in many countries like India and the far east of Asia through the Arab Muslim merchants who were showing the best of manners -especially in trade- to people of those countries. Their honesty and actions were so admired by people of those countries that they embraced Islam.
You can't walk around preaching people to embrace the religion of honesty when you are not honest! You can't advise people about morality in Islam when you don’t follow any morals! No one will believe what you are saying because simply you are not making any sense to them!
Another example of this is the story of the Jew who was a neighbor of the Prophet (peace be upon him) who used to dump rubbish on his doorstep. One day, the Prophet found no rubbish. The next day he found no rubbish, so he asked about the Jew, only to find that he was sick. He then visited the sick Jew and tried to make him feel better. As a result, the Jew became Muslim.
the Allah said: And do not backbite, would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother;

What does this PIG mean by putting "the" before ALLAH SWT? Can you explain this deliberate action piggy bitch?
thehassanabdi

UK

#18 Jun 18, 2013
kgiama wrote:
First let's see what did the Quran and the Prophet say about Akhlaaq (manners):
The Prophet Mohammad (peace be upon him), in Muwatta Imam Malik said: "Verily, I was sent for no other reason,except to perfect the noble traits of character''- in other words; one of the Prophet's goals, in fact, the primary mission was the perfection of how people behave - their manners.
A Muslim can't be a true Muslim if he does his Ibadaat (worshiping, i.e prayers, fasts, zakat..etc)very well but neglects an important side of his worship i.e Akhlaaq. In other words, he who prays his daily prayers in mosques well, but when it comes to dealing with people in his daily life he is the worst person, cannot be considered a true Muslim. This is true of people who backbite, spreading hate and evil among people, treat those who are under his care (family, employees…etc) cruelly and lie. Yet people who are like this are still proud of themselves and think that they are guaranteed a place in Jannah because of their prayers?
The connection between Iman and manners is very strong as the Prophet peace be upon him said that faith consists of seventy branches, the least of which is the removal of a tree branch blocking the road, and in another narration, sixty branches, and Hayaa'(which is an Arabic term, which is hard to translate and covers manners,modesty, guarding of chastity, etc) is a part of faith. So again, manners and behavior are linked directly to Iman.
The Prophet sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam said: "The best Mu'mins(believers) are those who are best in their akhlaaq, those whose shoulders' are trodden over."
The Prophet peace be upon him said: "Those of you who will be closest to me on the Day of Judgment will be those who have the best akhlaaq."
Is there any better blessing than being close to the Prophet in the day of judgment?
From Protected Pearls
More to come, Insha Allah
The Prophet sal Allaahu alayhi wa sallam said: "The best Mu'mins(believers) are those who are best in their akhlaaq, those whose shoulders' are trodden over."

PIG, Is this also a deliberate insult on ALLAH SWT? What exactly do you mean by "SAL" Allaahu? Is that how SALALLAHU is spelt? Can you explain that you bitch?

“turn back the hands of time”

Since: Apr 10

Location hidden

#19 Jun 18, 2013
peace n shaax123 wrote:
<quoted text>
I agree with the part about non Muslims having akhlaaq too. They can also have bad akhlaaq just like sonera Muslims. We are talking about how the somali community lacks akhlaaq. Do you agree?
Also, do you believe all evil stems from religion? Or that secular societies have no social issues? Or that non Muslims don't do injustices!
Yes, there is a lack of good manners in the Community. But that can´t be due to lack of religion, we are bombarded with religion. So what is it?

I don´t Think secular societies are free of problems, but they are better equipped for dealing with it than religious societies.

And no evil doesn´t stem from religion, it stems from human beings, even religious evil. It´s just that religion can and is being used to co-sign some of those evils.

Non muslims do injustice all the time, and so do muslims. I´m just saying that religion as the sole prerequisite for good manners is, intellectually, a stretch and giving religion way too much credit.
thehassanabdi

UK

#20 Jun 18, 2013
INSEARCH_OF wrote:
<quoted text>
Yes, there is a lack of good manners in the Community. But that can´t be due to lack of religion, we are bombarded with religion. So what is it?
I don´t Think secular societies are free of problems, but they are better equipped for dealing with it than religious societies.
And no evil doesn´t stem from religion, it stems from human beings, even religious evil. It´s just that religion can and is being used to co-sign some of those evils.
Non muslims do injustice all the time, and so do muslims. I´m just saying that religion as the sole prerequisite for good manners is, intellectually, a stretch and giving religion way too much credit.
Why can't this PIG find REAL work and leave this forum where it doesn't belong?

Tell me when this thread is updated:

Subscribe Now Add to my Tracker
First Prev
of 2
Next Last

Add your comments below

Characters left: 4000

Please note by submitting this form you acknowledge that you have read the Terms of Service and the comment you are posting is in compliance with such terms. Be polite. Inappropriate posts may be removed by the moderator. Send us your feedback.

Somalia Discussions

Title Updated Last By Comments
Black Man Dismembers His Own Mother Then Poses ... 1 hr take note 1
waxaan ahay guur doon (Aug '11) 4 hr abdiwahid 115
Qolka Guurka xalaasha ah ilaahey dartiis (Aug '12) 8 hr ali axmed 611
I'm a Somalian teen, raised as a Muslim and now... 9 hr Sheikh Voodoo 16
Mareehaan vs Majeerteen (Apr '12) 13 hr daarood boy 65
i need help from somalis regarding info about m... 16 hr jamac 1
God hates blacks 16 hr Guuleed 1
gus wayne gabadhii rabta halkanaa laga helaa (Jun '09) 20 hr mahir 4,365
futada iyo siilka keba macaan (May '11) Oct 17 Raxeye 1,754
dhuqmada siilka iyo mida guska tee macaan sidee... (Mar '11) Oct 17 beso 1,199

Somalia People Search

Addresses and phone numbers for FREE