A few jokes for the real Macedonians.

A few jokes for the real Macedonians.

Posted in the Macedonia Forum

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Informed Reader

Macedonia

#1 Feb 13, 2010
Mrs Merkel arrived at the recent meeting a little late, something to do with snow on the roads.

Waiting outside the building was George Papa (he sold the "ndreau" to pay for his flight).

Merkel tosses him her car keys and says "Park it somewhere nice, but not under a tree".

Papa is incredulous, "MADAM" he cries, "Do you know who I am"?

Calmly, Mrs Merkel looks him up and down before replying "Of course I do, now go park my car".

The old joke has it that after shaking hands with a Greek you should next wash your hand. Now it is believed that you should first check for your watch, and your shoes.

The people of Haiti are currently having a collection to aid the Greeks.

Apparently it is quiet on the streets of Athens this evening. The protestors are on strike. When the police went on strike last year, crime rates dropped!

Greece is traditionally ruled by powerful "names". Soon those names will be Merkel and Sarkozy.
Dr Sugamo Tokollo

Florence, AZ

#2 Feb 13, 2010
you'reanidiot...
backforashorttim e

Australia

#3 Feb 13, 2010
Informed Reader wrote:
Mrs Merkel arrived at the recent meeting a little late, something to do with snow on the roads.
Waiting outside the building was George Papa (he sold the "ndreau" to pay for his flight).
Merkel tosses him her car keys and says "Park it somewhere nice, but not under a tree".
Papa is incredulous, "MADAM" he cries, "Do you know who I am"?
Calmly, Mrs Merkel looks him up and down before replying "Of course I do, now go park my car".
The old joke has it that after shaking hands with a Greek you should next wash your hand. Now it is believed that you should first check for your watch, and your shoes.
The people of Haiti are currently having a collection to aid the Greeks.
Apparently it is quiet on the streets of Athens this evening. The protestors are on strike. When the police went on strike last year, crime rates dropped!
Greece is traditionally ruled by powerful "names". Soon those names will be Merkel and Sarkozy.
Go on spit your venom Skopian monkey, for humour it is not!
Fabian

Toronto, Canada

#4 Feb 13, 2010
Informed Reader wrote:
Mrs Merkel arrived at the recent meeting a little late, something to do with snow on the roads.
Waiting outside the building was George Papa (he sold the "ndreau" to pay for his flight).
Merkel tosses him her car keys and says "Park it somewhere nice, but not under a tree".
Papa is incredulous, "MADAM" he cries, "Do you know who I am"?
Calmly, Mrs Merkel looks him up and down before replying "Of course I do, now go park my car".
The old joke has it that after shaking hands with a Greek you should next wash your hand. Now it is believed that you should first check for your watch, and your shoes.
The people of Haiti are currently having a collection to aid the Greeks.
Apparently it is quiet on the streets of Athens this evening. The protestors are on strike. When the police went on strike last year, crime rates dropped!
Greece is traditionally ruled by powerful "names". Soon those names will be Merkel and Sarkozy.
Oh dear or dear, you are upset. Well don't be your health will be affected.

Give us a few good songs.

Here is one from me.

&fe ature=related
Informed Reader

Macedonia

#5 Feb 13, 2010
The name dispute could soon be over.

Following reports that corruption was rife in Greece, the new owners are torn between renaming their new land as either the "Republic of Corruptia" or "Neu Deutchland". Previous reports that Greece was "next to bankrupcy" have been proved false. Mr Nimetz hasn't achieved the impossible, and Greece is still next to Macedonia.

Amazingly the anthem of Neu Deutchland will be Deutchland Deutchland Uber Alles. Not so far removed from the old one, quoted some old men in Athens (soon to be renamed Neu-Berlin).

Nikola Sarkozy was said to be deeply upset at the French share in FHRoG (Former Hellenic Republic of Greece). He wanted Kos, but ended up with Lesbo's.

Austerity measures imposed should only apply to Greek nationals who can prove direct lineage with the ancients (ie nobody). As it is the new owners will only make them applicable to those who stole the money (all those who self identify as being Greek).

Foreigners will be exempt from paying higher taxes. The Bulgarian, Albanian, Turkish and Macedonian embassies are all expecting to take on new staff to meet the rush for passports.

When asked if they would be prepared to help the Greeks in their financial plight, the Cypriot government replied "Cyprus has nothing to do with Greece, them idiots have been living off of Cypriot tourism for years, and they owe us a few million Euro's too".
Fabian

Toronto, Canada

#6 Feb 13, 2010
Fabian

Toronto, Canada

#7 Feb 13, 2010
Fabian

Toronto, Canada

#8 Feb 13, 2010
Fabian

Toronto, Canada

#9 Feb 13, 2010
Informed Reader

Macedonia

#10 Feb 13, 2010
The Greek anti-corruption force of the interior ministry was closed yesterday amid allegations of, you guessed it, corruption.

Coin collectors across the globe are celebrating the re-introduction of the Drachma.

Greece announced earlier that it was firing all its lawyers in the ICJ case as it couldn't afford to pay them. They also wouldn't be seeking legal aid, as they never had much of a case.

Breaking news on the name dispute. New negotiator Mrs A Merkel - Berlin, has announced that Germany doesn't have an issue with the Republic of Macedonia. Neu-Deutchland officials though are still refusing to recognise a Greek minority within its borders, the UN is to investigate.

Greek crude oil transporters were impounded yesterday over their inability to pay their fuel bills.

Greek propagandists and philhellenes across the globe were left wondering if they would be paid next month. Australian politicians were seen returning new Porches and BMWs to the dealers amid fears that political bribes were also being scaled down.

George Papa has reluctantly accepted that the Elgin Marbles are indeed British. He blamed the slow, weak and innefectual Greek political machine saying "if the EU response to the Greek financial crisis was slow despite only taking a few weeks, our response to Elgin comming some 100 years late looks a bit lame".
Informed Reader

Macedonia

#11 Feb 13, 2010
The Greek subsidisation of Canadian college hockey teams will cease. Fabian and the Buds are now looking for new sponsors.

Mr Gruevski is said to be interested, and this will stop the team having to rename. They can continue to be known as the Vancover white flags.

All citizens of Neu Deutchland will have to undego mandatory Germanisation. Failure to speak the correct language in public will see the removal of privilages (air, water, bread) as well as the force feeding of bratwurst and saurkraut. Word on the streets that this would actually be a dietry improvment cannot be verified.
backforashorttim e

Australia

#12 Feb 13, 2010
Informed Reader wrote:
The name dispute could soon be over.
Following reports that corruption was rife in Greece, the new owners are torn between renaming their new land as either the "Republic of Corruptia" or "Neu Deutchland". Previous reports that Greece was "next to bankrupcy" have been proved false. Mr Nimetz hasn't achieved the impossible, and Greece is still next to Macedonia.
Amazingly the anthem of Neu Deutchland will be Deutchland Deutchland Uber Alles. Not so far removed from the old one, quoted some old men in Athens (soon to be renamed Neu-Berlin).
Nikola Sarkozy was said to be deeply upset at the French share in FHRoG (Former Hellenic Republic of Greece). He wanted Kos, but ended up with Lesbo's.
Austerity measures imposed should only apply to Greek nationals who can prove direct lineage with the ancients (ie nobody). As it is the new owners will only make them applicable to those who stole the money (all those who self identify as being Greek).
Foreigners will be exempt from paying higher taxes. The Bulgarian, Albanian, Turkish and Macedonian embassies are all expecting to take on new staff to meet the rush for passports.
When asked if they would be prepared to help the Greeks in their financial plight, the Cypriot government replied "Cyprus has nothing to do with Greece, them idiots have been living off of Cypriot tourism for years, and they owe us a few million Euro's too".
But beware! once you run out of venom (if at all possible) then shyt will follow.
Informed Reader

Macedonia

#13 Feb 13, 2010
Turks are celebrating the German takeover of FHRoG. It has been a while since they had a proper enemy. It was earlier feared that the French would assume control of the defence ministry when shipments of white flags were seen being unloaded in Neu-Berlin (formerly Athens) harbour. It would seem that they were simply sheets.

America formerly recognised Neu-Deutchland this morning. In Amsterdam though their were calls not to recognise the state as Deutch sounds a bit like Dutch. President George Ivanov of the Republic of Macedonia has offered to mediate a negotiated settlement.
Informed Reader

Macedonia

#14 Feb 13, 2010
As part of the planned spending cuts in Neu-Deutchland, people will with immediate effect adopt a Germanic sense of humour and refrain from finding the entire predicament even slightly humerous. Overt laughter will be dealt with seriously and the children of offenders will either be re-educated or simply shot in the streets (as is the cultural norm).

Members of the FHRoG airforce will replace their traditional "fly-past" at major national events with a new "walk-past" in an effort to reduce fuel costs.

All ammunition will be replaced with wooden dummies and troops employed only on their ability to shout "BANG" and "Ratatatatatatata"! The FHRoG navy and fishing fleet will be amalgamated with new anti-submarine "nets" being used to hunt for enemy sub-surface vessels.

Plans for the Secret Service to be reduced to a simple sales office were shelved after it was found that FHRoG had already sold every available NATO and EU secret first to the Serbians and later to Al Qa'eda.
Informed Reader

Macedonia

#15 Feb 13, 2010
A new space agency is planned for the newly Germanic FHRoG. Sadly though this is not an endeavour to further mans knowledge of the Cosmos, simply a plan to flatten all the illegal buildings to provide room for Europes largest single level car-park.

There will also be a new Beach tax imposed on any female FHRoG citizen. Their Beaches will have to pay tax, just like their Men.
Informed Reader

Macedonia

#16 Feb 13, 2010
In sport, FHRoG athletes will have to work harder for sponsorship deals. Well, they'll have to work, period. Weighlifters will be expected to carry their burden of debt, footballers will be employed to help smokers "kick" the habit and Greco-Wrestlers will simply be imprisoned as peadophiles.

Elsewhere, the IOC will revoke FHRoG membership after it was found that the Neu Berlin (formerly Athens) Olympic medals, rather than being Gold, Silver and Bronze were in fact Brass, Steel and amazingly, Chocolate.

UEFA will also ban FHRoG players from all internaitonal tournaments for no rerason whatsoever other than "because we can".

And now for the weather.
Informed Reader

Macedonia

#17 Feb 13, 2010
There will be a deep depression over FHRoG for a while, but this will be lifted when a fresh breeze drifts in from the North to dispel any nasty smells in the capital.

There will be rainfall on the exposed fire ruined hillsides, and flooding caused by the refusal to spend EU money on re-forestation but rather on new cars. Dark clouds are already gathering, and there is a gloomy outlook for the immediate future.

Citizens of FHRoG should expect a chill in internaitonal relations which should thaw about the same time that Hell(as) Freezes over.

That's all for tonight, now back to tonights comedy/thriller a party political broadcast from the PASOK party.
FabianBudsFriend s

Toronto, Canada

#18 Feb 13, 2010
Informed Reader wrote:
The Greek subsidisation of Canadian college hockey teams will cease. Fabian and the Buds are now looking for new sponsors.
Mr Gruevski is said to be interested, and this will stop the team having to rename. They can continue to be known as the Vancover white flags.
All citizens of Neu Deutchland will have to undego mandatory Germanisation. Failure to speak the correct language in public will see the removal of privilages (air, water, bread) as well as the force feeding of bratwurst and saurkraut. Word on the streets that this would actually be a dietry improvment cannot be verified.
OLYMPIC GAMES VANCOUVER, 2010
WE, OWE, GREECE, THE CRADLE OF CIVILIZATION, FOR ITS CONTRIBUTIONS TO THE WORLD.
THIS IS WHAT IS EATING AND RUINING YOUR MENTAL STATE?
AND FYROM COMES IN TO THE STADIUM.
http://www.vancouver2010.com/olympic-cross-co...
yes

Palatine, IL

#26 Feb 14, 2010
Informed Reader wrote:
Mrs Merkel arrived at the recent meeting a little late, something to do with snow on the roads.
Waiting outside the building was George Papa (he sold the "ndreau" to pay for his flight).
Merkel tosses him her car keys and says "Park it somewhere nice, but not under a tree".
Papa is incredulous, "MADAM" he cries, "Do you know who I am"?
Calmly, Mrs Merkel looks him up and down before replying "Of course I do, now go park my car".
The old joke has it that after shaking hands with a Greek you should next wash your hand. Now it is believed that you should first check for your watch, and your shoes.
The people of Haiti are currently having a collection to aid the Greeks.
Apparently it is quiet on the streets of Athens this evening. The protestors are on strike. When the police went on strike last year, crime rates dropped!
Greece is traditionally ruled by powerful "names". Soon those names will be Merkel and Sarkozy.
hahahahahha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahh ahhahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahaha hahahahahha

“Macedonian, therefore Greek”

Since: Apr 07

Lychnidos, occupied Macedonia

#27 Feb 14, 2010
Informed Reader wrote:
..........
Greece is traditionally ruled by powerful "names". Soon those names will be Merkel and Sarkozy.
and they have their tools in the era to push Greece: Titozombies and Turkey. Thanks to you we spend about 5% of our GDP for the army.

as if you don't have Tito or baba-Obama.
MALAKES !!!

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