Should teens be caned at home?

Created by Peterandmarie on Apr 30, 2008

695 votes

Click on an option to vote

Yes

No

Thats a family matter

Since: Jan 10

Harrow, UK

#82 Jan 3, 2010
It's interesting I find when people agree to the use of any form of corporal punishment that they usually say things like it never did me any harm. Peronally I also went to school in a time when caning, strapping and many other forms of punishment were used.
My opinion is that it is completely wrong and not only out dated but down right cruel and not necessary at all.
It is usually done by parents who simply won't take the time to explain to their kids what they have done wrong. I see little difference between a kid and an adult in that none of them like to be beaten to get some sort of behaviour out of them. I had teachers at school who did these frequently and I consider them as thugs and bullies, so incompetent in their own ability, that they had to resort to violence to get their own way.
It hasn't changed much if parents continue to do it and who misinterpret respect, manners and obedience for what it really is, FEAR.
moi

Ireland

#83 Jan 4, 2010
Enda wrote:
It's interesting I find when people agree to the use of any form of corporal punishment that they usually say things like it never did me any harm. Peronally I also went to school in a time when caning, strapping and many other forms of punishment were used.
My opinion is that it is completely wrong and not only out dated but down right cruel and not necessary at all.
It is usually done by parents who simply won't take the time to explain to their kids what they have done wrong. I see little difference between a kid and an adult in that none of them like to be beaten to get some sort of behaviour out of them. I had teachers at school who did these frequently and I consider them as thugs and bullies, so incompetent in their own ability, that they had to resort to violence to get their own way.
It hasn't changed much if parents continue to do it and who misinterpret respect, manners and obedience for what it really is, FEAR.
learly you have no idea what teens are like today. I just have to laugh when I read posts regarding how if paarents just talked to their kids everything would be ok, get real!Talking doesn't work..thats why kids are beating up their parents, stabbing and shooting people, committing rape, dealing drugs etc etc.
The cane , properly used does work!
i was spanked

Saudi Arabia

#84 Jan 6, 2010
I read a recent article in the Irish Independent suggesting that children who were spanked while growing up, typically went on to be more successful in their careers as adults than those who were not. The same article included a warning that while it may well be the case, it was also to be noted that spanking was a “dangerous” tool. As someone who was spanked up to the age of 15, I prefer to say that spanking is a specialized tool and only becomes dangerous when in the wrong hands and, or if used inappropriately. Indeed, if spanking is not administered absolutely, perfectly correctly, the irreparable psychological damage it can do to a child might not manifest itself until much later in life, and in some quite shocking ways.

When I was spanked by my father, it was always in the privacy of my own room, with the door firmly closed. I was first told and made understand that what I’d done was totally unacceptable and that I deserved to be punished. I was then made undress, and when fully nude I was bent over my dad’s knee and spanked. A typical spanking during my teens was forty spanks in total, given with the open hand, on my bottom. No other implements were ever used, and no other part of my body was ever struck.

If parents are going to spank their children, the following guidelines are very strongly recommended:

Same-sex spanking only; i.e., dads spank sons, and mums spank daughters
Spank only in private, and preferably in the child’s own bedroom
Always spank the child nude; the feeling of vulnerability is important
Have the child undress only immediately prior to being spanked
Spank only with the open hand, and only on the bottom
Pre-determine the number of spanks to be given

A spanking should consist of certain degrees of the following elements, all of which combine to produce the overall effect of having been punished:

Humiliation
Shame
Vulnerability
Physical discomfort

All of the above should be temporary, and never long-lasting. Having the child strip nude in preparation for a spanking gives equal and adequate levels of humiliation, shame, and vulnerability, but should only be required of the child immediately before commencement of the actual spanking. Equally, the child should also be allowed get dressed again immediately after taking his or her spanking. Prolonged periods of nudity, either before or after a spanking are not good.
Spanking a child’s bottom inflicts a degree of physical discomfort. It can also inflict intense and lasting physical pain. The latter is to be avoided, at all costs.

Spanking should never leave bruises, marks, or discoloration of the skin that persists for longer than 1 hour. It is always recommended to pre-determine the number of spanks that constitutes a spanking. This number may be increased relatively with the age of the child, but should never exceed 40 spanks. A good guide is to assume 40 spanks as acceptable for a child of 16, and count back to 10 spanks for a child of 6.

When a spanking is over, forget it, immediately. Do not remind a child, at any time afterwards of the spanking he or she had yesterday, or last week, or last month, or for that matter, five minutes ago.
Parent

Ireland

#85 Jan 14, 2010
In the latest issue of "Alive" ( http://www.alive.ie/index.php ) scientific proof was put forward to show that it is essential to regularly discipline kids.
Patricia

Ireland

#86 Jan 15, 2010
i was spanked wrote:
I read a recent article in the Irish Independent suggesting that children who were spanked while growing up, typically went on to be more successful in their careers as adults than those who were not. The same article included a warning that while it may well be the case, it was also to be noted that spanking was a “dangerous” tool. As someone who was spanked up to the age of 15, I prefer to say that spanking is a specialized tool and only becomes dangerous when in the wrong hands and, or if used inappropriately. Indeed, if spanking is not administered absolutely, perfectly correctly, the irreparable psychological damage it can do to a child might not manifest itself until much later in life, and in some quite shocking ways.
When I was spanked by my father, it was always in the privacy of my own room, with the door firmly closed. I was first told and made understand that what I’d done was totally unacceptable and that I deserved to be punished. I was then made undress, and when fully nude I was bent over my dad’s knee and spanked. A typical spanking during my teens was forty spanks in total, given with the open hand, on my bottom. No other implements were ever used, and no other part of my body was ever struck.
If parents are going to spank their children, the following guidelines are very strongly recommended:
Same-sex spanking only; i.e., dads spank sons, and mums spank daughters
Spank only in private, and preferably in the child’s own bedroom
Always spank the child nude; the feeling of vulnerability is important
Have the child undress only immediately prior to being spanked
Spank only with the open hand, and only on the bottom
Pre-determine the number of spanks to be given
A spanking should consist of certain degrees of the following elements, all of which combine to produce the overall effect of having been punished:
Humiliation
Shame
Vulnerability
Physical discomfort
All of the above should be temporary, and never long-lasting. Having the child strip nude in preparation for a spanking gives equal and adequate levels of humiliation, shame, and vulnerability, but should only be required of the child immediately before commencement of the actual spanking. Equally, the child should also be allowed get dressed again immediately after taking his or her spanking. Prolonged periods of nudity, either before or after a spanking are not good.
Spanking a child’s bottom inflicts a degree of physical discomfort. It can also inflict intense and lasting physical pain. The latter is to be avoided, at all costs.
Spanking should never leave bruises, marks, or discoloration of the skin that persists for longer than 1 hour. It is always recommended to pre-determine the number of spanks that constitutes a spanking. This number may be increased relatively with the age of the child, but should never exceed 40 spanks. A good guide is to assume 40 spanks as acceptable for a child of 16, and count back to 10 spanks for a child of 6.
When a spanking is over, forget it, immediately. Do not remind a child, at any time afterwards of the spanking he or she had yesterday, or last week, or last month, or for that matter, five minutes ago.
What utter garbage. A good caning should leave bruises, thats the whole point, and of course it should be given in front of the family as a deterrant, preferably administered by the Father and on the bare bottom.
fabian

Singapore, Singapore

#87 Jan 31, 2010
I believe everything is about balance. You cane when you need to. But you must explain to the child why is he or she caned and you show that he or she is still loved. You cane when you need to, not just for the sake of it, and you must make sure that the child receive respect for his human dignity when you are doing that.
Peter F

Ireland

#88 Feb 8, 2010
You only have to look at the state of the country,most of the shootings, the drugs, the assaults and robberies are commited by teenage thugs.
I would have no problem with caning them regardless of whether they are boys or girls, if they are old enough to be out causing hassle , drinking, abusing people then they are old enough to be well caned
Stephen

Dublin, Ireland

#89 Feb 16, 2010
I absolutly agree with corporal punishment, but I cannot understand why this poll refers to teens.I have a 10 year old daughter, whom I cane when and if necessary. For instance, she is off school this week and yesterday she was both disobedient and disrespectful to her mother. Yesterday evening she recieved 4 strokes of the cane to her bottom.
I have no regrets or embarrassment regarding the use of corporal punishment, as I and my wife both recieved it as children. It is immediate and certain for the child and teaches respect, both for onself and for others.
John Limerick

Ireland

#91 Feb 27, 2010
Maureen wrote:
I fully agree with Malcolm. I have 2 children, now in their late teens and both have been, and still are caned.What has it done to them:
Taught them respect
Obedience
Modesty
Morality
and most importantly,Discipline.
The biggest mistake the modern generation made was abolishing caning in schoools and in the home
Fair play to you Maureen. If only more of this type of discipline was used things woud be alot better. By late teens what ages do you mean. have you had to use the cane lately, or have they learned their lesson.
Maureen

Ireland

#92 Mar 1, 2010
John Limerick wrote:
<quoted text>
Fair play to you Maureen. If only more of this type of discipline was used things woud be alot better. By late teens what ages do you mean. have you had to use the cane lately, or have they learned their lesson.
My eldest is now 19 and the younger is 17, she is still disciplined if it is needed. The last time was just after Christmas, when she was caned over an incident involving alcohol. She got a 10 strokes in front of her sister.
John Limerick

Ireland

#93 Mar 1, 2010
Maureen wrote:
<quoted text>
My eldest is now 19 and the younger is 17, she is still disciplined if it is needed. The last time was just after Christmas, when she was caned over an incident involving alcohol. She g
t a 10 strokes in front of her sister.
My 2 lads 15 and 17 were not impressed with your answer, because I put pay to the theory that nobody else only them get punished this way. Its the only way that works. I invested in a wooden spoon for €1 recently in a euro store. it has a good big head on it and works wonders. only as recently as yeaterday the 17 yr old was on the receiving end of it for his behaviour. after 12 whacks on his bare arse I can tell u his attitude changed
John Limerick

Ireland

#94 Mar 1, 2010
Stephen wrote:
I absolutly agree with corporal punishment, but I cannot understand why this poll refers to teens.I have a 10 year old daughter, whom I cane when and if necessary. For instance, she is off school this week and yesterday she was both disobedient and disrespectful to her mother. Yesterday evening she recieved 4 strokes of the cane to her bottom.
I have no regrets or embarrassment regarding the use of corporal punishment, as I and my wife both recieved it as children. It is immediate and certain for the child and teaches respect, both for onself and for others.
It has to be done.my 17yr old lad got 12 whacks of the wooden spoon on the bare arse yesterday. It changed his attitude I can tell you.

“"Never say never"”

Since: Sep 08

Location hidden

#95 Mar 10, 2010
This is an honest question. Not trying to be funny. Is it legal? I mean does it not come under abuse (under law in Ireland)?
Christine

Dehiwala, Sri Lanka

#96 Apr 22, 2010
i feel so sorry for you but one thing i know for sure that you'll be a good parent one day and your children will be so lucky to have you as their mum

Since: Apr 10

Location hidden

#97 Apr 26, 2010
Yes, yes, yes...Discipline is the key to family and community life!

Since: Aug 09

Location hidden

#98 May 2, 2010
What a load of bull.
If you beat children/cane them whatever then they will grow up only knowing how to deal with a situation is through their fists.
And young people these days are not all thugs most are fine and normal but of course you all mention the few who cause trouble.
It's never mentioned when you were all young the same type of trouble was around just blame the young people these days.
Same shit differnt day.
Caning kids is good

Dublin, Ireland

#99 May 4, 2010
realt wrote:
What a load of bull.
If you beat children/cane them whatever then they will grow up only knowing how to deal with a situation is through their fists.
And young people these days are not all thugs most are fine and normal but of course you all mention the few who cause trouble.
It's never mentioned when you were all young the same type of trouble was around just blame the young people these days.
Same shit differnt day.
Wrong! Wrong! Wrong!
If you are going to contribute to a debate then get your facts right. The same type of trouble was not happening in ireland 4o years ago. Any study of figures on juvenile crime, teen pregnancy,and public disorder shows categorically that there has been an alarming rise in these phenomena over that last few decades. Kids did not carry and use guns in Dublin in the 1970's, kids were not beinng charged with murder, rape, sexual assault on a routine basis in the 1970,s, teen pregnancies were a fraction of the number they are now, parents and teachers were not afraid of children back then either.
The total lack of discipline advocated by idfiots like you is causing the ruination of society.

Since: Aug 09

Location hidden

#100 May 4, 2010
I'd safely say the number of teen pregnancies in the '70s was far higher than today. Contraception is widely available and people know the consequences you fool. Not like years ago they were put into those laundries or sent off to England in shame. Nobody talked about it back then it was all secretive.
Murders, robbery and rape ALL happened since the beginning of time and it will never be stopped completely so get over yourself and try not to be one of the criminals yourself.
Caning works

Cadiz, Spain

#101 May 11, 2010
realt wrote:
I'd safely say the number of teen pregnancies in the '70s was far higher than today. Contraception is widely available and people know the consequences you fool. Not like years ago they were put into those laundries or sent off to England in shame. Nobody talked about it back then it was all secretive.
Murders, robbery and rape ALL happened since the beginning of time and it will never be stopped completely so get over yourself and try not to be one of the criminals yourself.
I would suggest that whoever you are you engage in some research, teen pregnancies are at epidemic proportions when measured against numbers in the 1970´s, thats not me saying it, that is the official government statistics that you were too lazy or arrogant to consult!
As for murder, rape and robbery, not to mention "anti social" behaviour, the statistics for those are also available, and once more you are utterly and completley wrong! sex offernces have risen incredibley, ESPECIALLY offences by young males aged 14 to 21, as have assaults, robberies and murders, such as those of the two poor Polish lads who were assaulted by a a mod of teens under the age of 17, and stabbed to death by a teen.
So wise up, get off your lazy liberal arse, and do some research before commenting!
States which utilize corporal punishment including U.S. states, Korea, Singapore, Malyasia etc have only a tiny proportrion of youth crime that we have in this part of the world.
Noel in Dublin

Dublin, Ireland

#102 May 25, 2010
I was spanked up to 18 years of age at school and 19 at home. Very last spanking occured when I was 21: myself and 5 other boys got into a scuffle at a disco. We were taken into the police station. A giant of a Guard called us into his office and then gave us a choice- be charged with violent conduct (I think) or face a good hiding. Of course we opted for the latter. So we were told to report back to the Superintendent in half an hour's time stripped to our White y-fronts. He then took each boy in turn over his knee and gave each 6 of the strap on seat of our pants; he then peeled down the pants for a further 6 on the bare bottom. Tears and apologies flowed!

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