A survey of more than 1,000 men in India has concluded that condoms made according to international sizes are too large for a majority of Indian men.
The study found that more than half of the men measured had penises that were shorter than international standards for condoms.
It has led to a call for condoms of mixed sizes to be made more widely available in India.
The two-year study was carried out by the Indian Council of Medical Research.
Over 1,200 volunteers from the length and breadth of the country had their penises measured precisely, down to the last millimetre.
About 60% of Indian men have penises which are between three and five centimetres shorter than international standards used in condom manufacture. Doctor Chander Puri, a specialist in reproductive health at the Indian Council of Medical Research, told the BBC there was an obvious need in India for custom-made condoms, as most of those currently on sale are too large.
Without firsthand experience in the realm of curry dick, we sought the counsel of an expert on the topic. So we interrupted erstwhile Intern Neel Shah at work so that we could get his opinion. The full interview is after the jump.
Gawker: Neel, as a representative for the South Asian man, how do you respond to the allegation that "about 60% of Indian men have penises which are between three and five centimetres shorter than international standards used in condom manufacture?"
Neel: Uh, no comment.
Gawker: Have you ever had a problem with an ill-fitting condom?
Neel: Uh, no comment.
Gawker: The tipster who sent us this link titled his email "Breaking: Pope wears funny hat/Bear shits in woods. Were you aware that the stereotype of the small-dicked Indian man was so prevalent? And if so, why?
Gawker: NEEL, RICHARD HAS A CAMERA. I WILL SEND YOU A BOOB PHOTO IF YOU COME UP WITH ONE HALFWAY DECENT RESPONSE. I MEAN IT.
Neel: im thinking!
Neel: these are tough questions
Neel: gimme a min, getting coffee
Gawker: you are such a tease!
Neel: I've never heard this before. Perhaps you have us confused for the Jews?
Gawker: Ok, last question: how big is your weiner?
Neel: one sec.
Gawker: I didn't ask how long you usually last during sex, I asked how big your weiner was!
Neel: haha. very clever. trying to be somewhat amusing here!
Gawker: Try faster.
Neel: Bibi Ka Maqbara
Gawker: uhhh, not getting it
Neel: it's the miniature version of the taj mahal
the building i linked to. is the joke not obvious?
if not, ill give you something else.
Gawker: nope, actually still curious as to your dick size. Obviously you've measured it. Just tell!
Neel: ugh. what are you trying to do to me here?!
Gawker: make sure no one thinks you have a small dick. I'm doing you a favor, really.
Neel: i need a joke though
Neel: i also dont know centimeters
Neel: it's a nice sized chutney bottle
Gawker: THANK YOU. dismissed.