Funny Michael Jackson Jokes

“Dark Lord of All.”

Since: Jun 13

The Untempered Schism.

#2998 Sep 25, 2013
Q: How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead?

A: They waved a cub scout under his nose and couldn’t revive him.

“Dark Lord of All.”

Since: Jun 13

The Untempered Schism.

#2999 Sep 25, 2013
50,000 Catholic priests are now happy; they no longer have to share their altar boys with Micheal Jackson.

“Dark Lord of All.”

Since: Jun 13

The Untempered Schism.

#3000 Sep 25, 2013
Police wanted to talk with the doctor at Michael Jackson’s bedside but by the time the Police showed up, the doctor’s mother had come to pick him up and take him home.

“Dark Lord of All.”

Since: Jun 13

The Untempered Schism.

#3001 Sep 25, 2013
Welcome to Neverland Ranch. You must be at least 4’11 to ride Michael.

“Dark Lord of All.”

Since: Jun 13

The Untempered Schism.

#3002 Sep 25, 2013
Sources close to the family say Michael Jackson died with his pants around his ankles watching Sesame Street.

“Dark Lord of All.”

Since: Jun 13

The Untempered Schism.

#3003 Sep 25, 2013
Q: What’s 50 + 8 + 5?

A: Micheal Jackson’s perfect threesome!

“at yet more f'loonspin”

Since: Aug 11

I live far away from f'loons

#3004 Sep 25, 2013
Pishpash1234 wrote:
<quoted text>
''My Michael''? You dont happen to be one of the jurors from the 2005 case?
Maybe she's the juror who went to the Jackson victory party, to celebrate the acquittal.

“Why can't you share your bed?”

Since: May 13

Canada

#3005 Sep 25, 2013
Len is Disgusted wrote:
<quoted text>
Michael took the 5th Amendment every, single time he was questioned about his behavior with children, during every, single case. He was given numerous chances, during civil cases, a criminal case, and a potential criminal case to explain himself. He always took the 5th Amendment.
Admit it. Had Michael gotten on the stand, explained why he slept with little boys, and answered questions, during cross-examination, he'd be in prison, right now.
"Why can't you just share your bed? The most loving thing you can do is share your bed".

“Why can't you share your bed?”

Since: May 13

Canada

#3006 Sep 25, 2013
Len is Disgusted wrote:
<quoted text>
Maybe she's the juror who went to the Jackson victory party, to celebrate the acquittal.
According to Eleanor Cook, Juror#5, there was at least two and possibly three f'loon jurors in the trial. One of them had to have been laughing at Jason Francia during the lunch break of his testimony.

“Why can't you share your bed?”

Since: May 13

Canada

#3007 Sep 25, 2013
Which of Michael Jackson's purchased children will forget him the fastest, and why???

Blanket because he's stuck with a horrible nickname, and he will discover Michael nearly killed him over a balcony for his fans.

“Why can't you share your bed?”

Since: May 13

Canada

#3008 Sep 25, 2013
Len is Disgusted wrote:
<quoted text>
Maybe she's the juror who went to the Jackson victory party, to celebrate the acquittal.
In the COURT TV message board we dubbed her "horse teeth" because she had a hideous overbite. She is the one who attended the Neverland party at the end of the week following the verdict.

Since: Feb 11

Location hidden

#3010 Sep 26, 2013
tony abbot wrote:
What is not a joke was michael's penetration of his pet monkey's behind. Poor old bubbles. Nobody gives a shit about this animal.
What is not a joke is you moron!
hahaha

United States

#3011 Sep 26, 2013
Hilarious. Roflmao. Sharing
Rebecca

Stoughton, MA

#3012 Sep 26, 2013
TripleH1976 wrote:
Which of Michael Jackson's purchased children will forget him the fastest, and why???
Blanket because he's stuck with a horrible nickname, and he will discover Michael nearly killed him over a balcony for his fans.
Michael Jackson wasn't a bad dad. That name blanket is cute. Don't even say one word about Michael's children dip shit or you'll hear it from me. I saw what he did with the balcony and I am telling you he didn't hurt his baby and never would. I don't want to hear about that balcony. He did nothing wrong. I stand by Michael on everything. No one talks bad about him and think I will not speak up. Oh I will. When you love someone you stand by them through it all. That's what I am doing for Michael. He has me forever sticking up for him. Love you Michael forever

“Evolution is fab!”

Since: Nov 12

Location hidden

#3015 Sep 26, 2013
J-J-Jina Wild wrote:
<quoted text>
He'd be quite nice to go shopping for handbags with though.
He would and I bet he really misses all those swanky clothing stores in downtown Manhattan. Though, he always has Google Street View to remind him of his imaginary lifestyle.

“Why can't you share your bed?”

Since: May 13

Canada

#3016 Sep 26, 2013
Rebecca wrote:
<quoted text> Michael Jackson wasn't a bad dad. That name blanket is cute. Don't even say one word about Michael's children dip shit or you'll hear it from me. I saw what he did with the balcony and I am telling you he didn't hurt his baby and never would. I don't want to hear about that balcony. He did nothing wrong. I stand by Michael on everything. No one talks bad about him and think I will not speak up. Oh I will. When you love someone you stand by them through it all. That's what I am doing for Michael. He has me forever sticking up for him. Love you Michael forever
If MJ left Blanket in a hot car on a scorching August day, would you stick up for him then too???
persephone

Sunnyvale, CA

#3017 Sep 26, 2013
TripleH1976 wrote:
<quoted text>
According to Eleanor Cook, Juror#5, there was at least two and possibly three f'loon jurors in the trial. One of them had to have been laughing at Jason Francia during the lunch break of his testimony.
What excuses do you come up with when people disagree on other cases which don't involve celebrities?

Since: Jul 13

Location hidden

#3018 Sep 26, 2013
TripleH1976 wrote:
<quoted text>
According to Eleanor Cook, Juror#5, there was at least two and possibly three f'loon jurors in the trial. One of them had to have been laughing at Jason Francia during the lunch break of his testimony.
This just confirms how sick f'loons really are. Even before any trial had began in 1993, they were viciously protesting against the victims. Ive come to the conclusion that there are many fans who believe he was guilty deep down, but will defend him because they cannot let go of their disturbing pseudo attachment to a man who they have never met. They fell for Michaels phoney proclamation
Rebecca

Stoughton, MA

#3020 Sep 26, 2013
Pishpash1234 wrote:
<quoted text>
This just confirms how sick f'loons really are. Even before any trial had began in 1993, they were viciously protesting against the victims. Ive come to the conclusion that there are many fans who believe he was guilty deep down, but will defend him because they cannot let go of their disturbing pseudo attachment to a man who they have never met. They fell for Michaels phoney proclamation
Michael Jackson wasn't guilty for real. You have no idea what you are talking about ass wipe. I love this man and want this stupid ass lies to stop now. There's no need to say things about an amazing guy that never did a thing wrong. Michael was a true blessing to my life and to all the children around the world. I am proud of MJ. I love my angel eyes forever.
persephone

Sunnyvale, CA

#3021 Sep 26, 2013
Pishpash1234 wrote:
<quoted text>
This just confirms how sick f'loons really are. Even before any trial had began in 1993, they were viciously protesting against the victims. Ive come to the conclusion that there are many fans who believe he was guilty deep down, but will defend him because they cannot let go of their disturbing pseudo attachment to a man who they have never met. They fell for Michaels phoney proclamation
Some people fall for phony molestation stories.

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