Are my feelings reasonable?
Posted in the Top Stories Forum
Since: Aug 14
#1 Aug 10, 2014
I am currently in a relationship with my bf who I have known since middle school. We knew of each other during school, but we never really talked. It wasn't until a few months after I had my daughter that he contacted me on Facebook and told me he thought I was pretty. We ended up dating a few months later. In the beginning things were great, but we started to argue soon after and he broke up with me. I was very devastated and heartbroken. It took me 6 months to get over him, and the only reason why I got over him was because I had met someone else, who I soon became engaged to. My Ex Fiancé and I dated for a year and a half. During the year and a half I would communicate with my now current boyfriend from time to time, and shockingly we bumped into each other twice. After a year and a half my relationship with my Ex Fiancé went sour. My now current boyfriend and I begin talking more to each other, and we both agreed that we still had feelings for each other. Last December on Christmas he texted me and told me that his ex girlfriend from 7 months ago told him that she was pregnant, and that it was between him and another guy but she was definitely sure that it was the other guys baby. For the brief moment that they were dating his ex had told him that she was on birth control, so my boyfriend wasn't too worried about it. The other guy even signed the birth certificate and gave the boy his last name. So my current boyfriend and I continued on with our relationship, and we grew closer and closer together...even closer then we did before in the past. In February of this year his ex contacted him and told him that she wanted him to take a DNA test to just be sure that he wasn't the father. And she confessed to him that she had lied about being on birth control. The test results came back that he WAS the father, and me and him were BOTH devastated. He even cried to me on the phone and told me how sorry he was about everything. I was definitely heart broken because I really do love and care about him, and I wanted to be the woman who gave him his children and everything. After finding out that he was the father, he did introduce me to his ex girlfriend has his girlfriend. We even went to Panama City and Pensacola Florida for his sisters wedding and I got to meet his dads side of the family for the first time, and even BEFORE his child's mother even had the chance to meet his dad. But we begin arguing again because I felt insecure about the whole situation about another woman having his child, and so he broke up with me. We broke up for about 4 months but we recently have gotten back together. He has told me numerous times that he loves me with all his heart, and that what happened with him and his ex was not suppose to happen, and she lied to him, and that I'm who he wants to marry and be with for the rest of his life. I believe him when he says this, but I start to feel sad about everything when I start to think about it all together. And I feel like the situation has kind of put a strain on our relationship and future plans of moving in together, and doing more, because he has hired a lawyer to get visitations to see his son, and he's about to start paying child support. I guess my question is...are my feelings justified or reasonable? I do feel like him and his ex share something that we don't. And even though he has never hesitated to go back to her because they do have a child together...and he has always expressed to me that he doesn't love her, he loves me. And I do feel like him going to court to get visitations to see his son is one way of showing that he doesn't plan to be with her....but once again are my feelings justified or reasonable?
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