Well, I appreciate your well wishes and I apologize for my "inarticulate" remark. It was unkind, and I try hard to stay above that sort of thing.<quoted text>
I agree, the 'sucks for you' part was uncalled for. I'm a bit slow, so I have lots of study but am rather new at this,'remember the holy spirit lives in you stuff. I'm sure the Lord loves you, but I am in this aging flesh that should probably go vegan, for others sake.
Now, the (The world is terribly unfair to inarticulate people, isn't it?) part.
God is not a respecter of man. Meaning He can be unfair to everyone equally or no one equally. Unfair is subjective. My mom was just a mom and till the day she passed on she said that children want to be seen, caught and disciplined. Meaning, given perimeters and purpose. Yet, the whole time your doing it, the child is screaming that your unfair.
The question isn't wether you want to be a christian or if you think others are acting like christians. It's more like, the story of Jonah. Is God pursuing you? Are you called? As you continue on with your life post-church and are no longer pursuing God is He still in you? Ya see many of us leave church because we are told that God is a reaction. He only reacts good for good and bad for bad.
Well, I have found it to be the other way around. He is the potentate, the alpha. That's why christianity isn't a religion, it's a heralding. It is a trumpeting that we are being pursued, sought out!
Believe me, your spirit will rejoice at this if you are called. Sorta like when He rose the little girl from the dead. Though she was dead, she heard Him calling her, Tabitha
I have found my life to be rich and full with nothing more than this material world and everything in it. People, for instance.
If you feel the presence of some non-material being, I have no argument with you other than to say, I don't feel such a thing myself.
Thanks again for leaving your thoughts.