The Book Of Jiyuu

Since: Oct 13

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#1 Oct 4, 2013
THE BOOK OF JIYUU

A Satiric Aid To Understanding The Scriptures (1)

*** Chapter 1 ***

[1.1] A brief history of the Jehovah's Witnesses, descendants of the First Century Christians:

[1.2] The First Century Christians gave birth to the Aryans; [1.3] The Aryans gave birth to the Waldenses; [1.4] The Waldenses gave birth to the Lollards; [1.5] The Lollards gave birth to the Anabaptists; [1.6] The Anabaptists gave birth to the Adventists; [1.7] The Adventists gave birth to the International Bible Students Association; [1.8] and the International Bible Students Association gave birth to the Jehovah's Witnesses.

[1.9] The first President of the Watch Tower Bible & Tract Society was Charles Taze Russell; [1.10] who was succeeded by Joseph Rutherford; [1.11] who was succeeded by Nathan Knorr; [1.12] who was succeeded by Fred Franz; [1.13] who was succeeded by Milton Henschel; [1.14] who was succeeded by Don Adams,[1.15] who is not a member of the Governing Body of Jehovah's Witnesses,[1.16] since it was considered advisable to separate corporate jobs from spiritual ones.

[1.17] All this information, then, from the First Century Christians to Don Adams constitutes fourteen basic bits of information you need to know about the Jehovah's Witnesses, whose Governing Body (aka 'Faithful and Discreet Slave') has an unbroken line of spiritual feeding from the First Century Christians to the present day.

[1.18] Concerning the birth of Jay, it happened this way. While his pregnant mother Maria was living with her boyfriend Joe, she started a Bible Study with Jehovah's Witnesses and after sometime told him that they needed to get married or he would have to live somewhere else.[1.19] However, because he was not looking for a permanent relationship, he had already secretly decided to pack his bags that night and leave.

[1.20] However, after Maria had left to do some shopping, and while he was giving the matter some more thought, a knock came at the door and having opened it, look! A Minister of Jehovah's Witnesses appeared before him and said: "Hello Joe, I know Maria is going to have a baby and she's going to need your support. Why not come along to The Meeting this Sunday and meet the folk at the Kingdom Hall?.[1.21] For she will want to raise your child as a Jehovah's Witness, and send him out on The Ministry to find sincere people who want to study the Bible."

[1.22] And so Joe had a change of heart and went with Maria to the Sunday Meeting, and discovered that The Organization welcomes even single mothers and good-for-nothing men.[1.23] For The Elders told him,“Look! Even though she's pregnant, you both can get married in a registry office, get baptised, and then your child will be born into a family of Jehovah's Witnesses (which means, when translated, "that body of Christians who recognise the spiritual authority of the Governing Body of Jehovah's Witnesses situated at 25 Columbia Heights Brooklyn New York, United States.")[1.24] After that Joe, like Maria, experienced a deep emotional response, and from then on did everything The Elders directed him to do, but he did not return to his girlfriend's home.[1.25] For he had been instructed not to have sex with her anymore until they were married; and then only to perform those sex acts approved for use by the Governing Body.

Since: Oct 13

Location hidden

#2 Oct 4, 2013
THE BOOK OF JIYUU

A Satiric Aid To Understanding The Scriptures (1)

*** Chapter 2 ***

[2.1] One day, when Jay had grown up, he was found to be reading this text aloud: "A voice was heard in The Spiritual Paradise, weeping and crying out in emotional pain; it was the voice of Rachel weeping for her child, and she was unwilling to take comfort, for the child was no more because of The Organization's policy on Blood Transfusions."

[2.2] Therefore the three Bible Students began seriously questioning him, saying:“How could this be?”[2.3] Therefore Jay said to them: "To be honest, unless you obey The Governing Body and refuse to drink blood by way of an intravenous method, you will have no Spiritual life in The Organization, for if unrepentant, then you will be Disfellowshipped." For these were the day's before New Light revealed that it was not a disfellowshipping offence, but was one of 'automatic disassociation'(which means when translated,'guilt by disassociation')[2.4] "He that heeds the orders coming from The Governing Body and refuses to drink blood by way of an intravenous method and then dies, that one will be assured of a resurrection into The Earthly Paradise; [2.5] for the symbol of life, that is blood, is more important than that which it represents."

[2.6] "He that heeds the orders of The Governing Body and refuses to drink blood by way of an intravenous method will help maintain the Unity Of The Organization.[2.7] Just as The Mother Organization, holds out to me The Hope Of Living Forever on a Paradise Earth, so too, if you become baptized, you will have that Hope also.[2.8] These are the orders that have come down from Brooklyn. It is not as when previous generations of Jehovah's Witnesses were allowed to choose for themselves and yet lived. He that feeds on The Literature will have The Hope Of Living Forever" [2.9] He was saying these things to them while they were at their first Assembly Of Jehovah's Witnesses.

[2.10] Therefore one of his Bible Students, when he heard this, said: "This requirement is shocking; who could ever agree to it?" [2.11] But Jay, knowing in himself how disturbing this issue was, said to them: "Are you stumbled by this?[2.12] Do you not know that The Governing Body has ascended, in authority, to the place where Jesus Christ was before he came to earth?[2.13] It is their words that are life-giving; ours are of no use at all. They are 'spirit-directed'(which means when translated,'vote-directed') and obedience to them will give you some meaning and purpose to your life.[2.14] But I sense that some of you do not believe that." For from the beginning of his Bible Study with each one of them, Jay had an idea who would be more likely to believe and who would not.[2.15] Therefore he continued on to say:“This is the reason I said to you previously, no one can have A Proper Relationship With God unless it is granted through The Mother Organization.”

[2.16] Because of this one of them left The Assembly immediately, later discontinued his Bible Studies, and continued to be Part Of This World.[2.17] Therefore Jay said to the two who remained: "You are not thinking about leaving also, are you?" [2.18] Mr Simmons replied: "Well, WHERE shall we go away to? You talk about The Hope Of Everlasting Life; [2.19] and I, for one, have come to believe that The Governing Body is God's Sole Channel Of Communication On Earth." [2.20] Jay thought to himself: "I've studied with you for a while, have I not, yet I wonder if you really believe that?" [2.21] He also had his concerns about Miss Meetings, for this one was going relay to him some facts about The Organization that he was not aware of.[2.22] Nevertheless, he continued to try to encourage the two who had remained.

Since: Oct 13

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#3 Oct 4, 2013
THE BOOK OF JIYUU

A Satiric Aid To Understanding The Scriptures (1)

*** Chapter 3 [Part 1]***

[3.1] "Make sure you hand in Monthly Reports of your Field Service so it can be used to help assess your Spirituality by The Elders; otherwise they will think you are Spiritually Weak and you may not be considered for Privileges.[3.2] So when you go on The Ministry, remember to keep a note of your Hours and Literature Placements, not like the Spiritually Weak ones at the Kingdom Hall who go along to occasional Meetings in the hope that someone may still care about them. To be honest, they are deluded.[3.3] You however, should not let them know that,[3.4] that your real opinion of them may be a secret; then your Mother who is watching you secretly might eventually repay you with a place in The New System Of Things."

[3.5] "In addition to that, when you pray, you should not be like the Spiritually Weak, who say their prayers in their heads just before eating a meal at a restaurant, so as not to stand out. To be honest, they must be wary of attracting attention.[3.6] You, however, just before eating a meal at a restaurant, don't say your prayer in secret; then your Mother who is watching you in secret, via the eyes and ears of your fellow Brothers and Sisters, might eventually repay you with a place in The New System Of Things.[3.7] When you are at The Meeting doing The Watchtower Study, try to keep to the answers you underlined in the paragraphs, for don't imagine you will be thought of as Spiritual if you use too much originality.[3.8] Therefore, do not decide for yourself what you will be studying, for The Governing Body your Mother knows what things you will need to be reading."

[3.9]“This, then is how you must pray:'Our Mother on the earth, let your name be highly esteemed.[3.10] Let your Kingdom Ministries continue to come. Let your will take place, as in the Bethels, also within the Kingdom Halls.[3.11] Give us today our Daily Text for this day; [3.12] and continue to keep us in debt, as we know how it is important to keep giving donations towards the loans for and upkeep of your Kingdom Halls, as well as supporting the World Wide Work.[3.13] And do not allow us to think for ourselves or question our beliefs, but deliver us from criticism.'[3.14] For if you shun former friends and family who are disfellowshipped or have disassociated themselves, then your earthly Mother will approve of you; [3.15] whereas if you do not shun them, your Mother will not forgive you."

Since: Oct 13

Location hidden

#4 Oct 4, 2013
THE BOOK OF JIYUU

A Satiric Aid To Understanding The Scriptures (1)

*** Chapter 3 [Part 2]***

[3.16] "When you are out on The Ministry, stop becoming sad-faced unlike The Apostates, for they put on a happy face that they may appear to us to be enjoying themselves. To be honest, I would have to say that they are having a great time.[3.17] But you, before you go to The Meetings, brush your hair and wash your face and put on a smart suit if you are A Brother, or a smart dress if you are A Sister (but not a trouser/pants suit),[3.18] that you may appear to be important, not to The World, but to your Mother who is incognito; then your Mother who is secretly watching you might eventually repay you with a place in The New System Of Things."

[3.19] "Stop thinking about having a Worldly Career in This System Of Things, where there are opportunities for bettering yourself and becoming financially secure, and where you can spend money how you like.[3.20] Rather, become a window cleaner and put yourselves in line for unending requirements in The Truth, where nothing is guaranteed, and your monetary contributions are spent to keep the Watch Tower in business.[3.21] For where your unquestioning obedience is, there your heart will be also."

[3.22] "The light of logic is found in the mind. So, if your mind is dull, your whole body, including your legs, will be ready to regularly employ you in Theocratic Activities without question, even though they may be very boring.[3.23] but if your mind is bright, it will question things too much, and your whole body will resist participation. If in truth you are dull, how wonderful that dullness is![3.24] No one can slave for The Organization and at the same time be his own person; for either he will bury his disagreements and stay with The Organization, or he will stick to his conscience and leave The Organization. You cannot slave for The Organization and have your own personal set of beliefs and sense of morality."

[3.25] "So, to be honest, I tell you: Stop worrying about the fact that The Organization is not like the Churches in setting up charities to help all sorts of people in material need. Does not The Preaching Of The Kingdom mean more than food and the holding of Assemblies more than clothing?[3.26] Pay careful attention to The Governing Body, because they personally neither grow food nor gather it into storehouses; still your earthly Mother makes sure they get fed. Aren't they worth more than you are?[3.27] Who among you by getting upset about this matter can change anything?"

[3.28] "And concerning clothing, why are you even thinking about that? Learn from companies trading in donated clothing, how they are increasing; they do not give their services free, it's all about spin; [3.29] I tell you, not even King Solomon with all his wisdom could have thought up a building empire like The Organization's.[3.30] So, if The Organization keeps losing members of The Great Crowd who are here today and gone tomorrow as they are thrown out into The World, will it not much rather keep you safe, you with so much trust in it?[3.31] Therefore, never get alarmed and say,'Why do they keep changing the meaning of The Generation', or 'Why do they keep changing what counts as Blood' or,‘Why do they keep saying that The New System is almost here'. For your earthly Mother knows you have these and many other disturbing questions."

[3.33]“So then, continue to seek first how you can do more work for The Organization, and all your worries will be sorted out in The New System, if you make it there.[3.34] Therefore, put all of the inconsistencies that you are seeing today out of your mind, for tomorrow there will be even more. It is sufficient to try to not worry about today's New Light."

Since: Oct 13

Location hidden

#5 Oct 4, 2013
THE BOOK OF JIYUU

A Satiric Aid To Understanding The Scriptures (1)

*** Chapter 4 ***

The Parable Of The Inactive One

[4.1] But, wanting to appear Spiritual, The Body Of Elders said:“What really is the right attitude toward Inactive Ones?" [4.2] In reply The Governing Body said: "A certain Inactive One got very depressed, stopped coming to Meetings and experienced Spiritual Turmoil.[4.3] Now, by coincidence, one day a Ministerial Servant happened to be on The Ministry in this Inactive One's street, but, when he saw the Inactive One's house, he decided to cross over to the opposite side of the street.[4.4] Six months' later when an Elder was working The Territory again, as soon as he reached the Inactive One's house, he decided to quickly move on and call on some homes further down the street.[4.5] Meanwhile, the Inactive One had done much searching on The Internet and found a support group for JWs. However, this web site run by an Apostate (which can mean, when translated: one who deliberately spreads teachings contrary to Bible truth as taught by Jehovah's Witnesses).[4.6] The Apostate site gave lots friendly advice and had many members who were able to encourage and help the Inactive One overcome his Spiritual Turmoil.[4.7] Even though the cost of running the web site was expensive, the Apostate bore all of the cost, for she said to herself:'I want there to always be a place online that can help people in this way'.[4.8] Now, who of these three seems to you to have shown the right attitude toward the Inactive One who fell into Spiritual Turmoil?" [4.9] So The Body Of Elders said: "The Ministerial Servant and The Elder because (a) they were not Apostates,(b) they didn't want to disturb the Inactive One, and (c) they knew anyway that he would get yearly visits to encourage him to come back to The Meetings." [4.10] The Governing Body then said, "Go back to your congregation and be doing the same yourselves."

Since: Oct 13

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#6 Oct 4, 2013
THE BOOK OF JIYUU

A Satiric Aid To Understanding The Scriptures (1)

*** Chapter 5 ***

Acts Of The Governing Body (Prologue)

[5.1] You will recall that we told you previously about The Theocratic Arrangement which was set up for The Governing Body to direct while Jesus was not available to be seen.[5.2] Until that day when all the nations would be able to see him, we were given Spiritual Authority to plug into the holy electricity output to power our New Light bulb.[5.3] And so by positive proofs we showed ourselves to be The Faithful And Discreet Slave Class which was chosen in 1919 CE (although back then it took several years for the communication to reach us, so we continued on for a while with our Babylonish celebrations of Birthdays and Christmas).[5.4] For up until that time we had been hoping to meet our Lord in person at The End Of The System Of Things, but even though it did not happen we felt it best not to withdraw from our current chronology, and kept waiting to see what would happen.[5.5] This was because we had not only been baptized with water, but were also of The Anointed, and our New Light bulb was not yet bright enough to reveal The Great Crowd standing before The Throne of God with phonographs in their hands."

[5.6] One day, when we were all assembled together, our President, Brother Rutherford, brought up the subject of the resurrection with regard to those Faithful Men who lived a long time ago. Then the Judge said, "I firmly believe that when they are resurrected they will find themselves all alone in the USA and in need of accommodations.[5.7] Also, since our dear departed Brother Russell is no longer here to give his valuable insight, I took it upon myself to work out a new chronology, now that the times and seasons and have been placed within our own jurisdiction. Therefore, I'm pleased to announce that those Faithful Men will be arriving in 1925.[5.8] So, I have an idea to build a wonderful home for them, which we will call Beth Sarim, and I will go there often and get filled with the Spirit, and we will send out The Brethren to announce it in America and in all Europe and Asia and to the most remote parts of the earth." [5.9] And some time after he had said these things, when this glorious place had been built, he regularly went to make sure that people like *David would find it agreeable to live in this slightly-smaller-than-accustom ed-to dwelling.

* Note: Of course, David's father Solomon likely would not be resurrected since he was an Apostate. However, if Solomon was resurrected and he lived in Beth Sarim, his son David (because they would both be living at the same address and were family) could say, "Hello" to him and share a meal with him at the dining table, but all the other Ancient Worthies could neither say, "Hello" to him nor have a meal with him, otherwise they would have to be Disfellowshipped.

Since: Oct 13

Location hidden

#8 Oct 4, 2013
[Sorry, duplicate post]

This constitutes the five current chapters of 'The Book of Jiyuu'.

Since: Oct 13

Location hidden

#9 Oct 4, 2013
My apologies to this forum. I'm a newcomer to topix and somehow posted this in the wrong forum. It should have been put in www.topix.com/forum/religion/jehovahs-witness !

Since: Oct 10

Homebush, Australia

#10 Nov 13, 2013
Jiyuu wrote:
My apologies to this forum. I'm a newcomer to topix and somehow posted this in the wrong forum. It should have been put in www.topix.com/forum/religion/jehovahs-witness !
brilliant!!

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