ye olde village pub

“ON TRAIL W / DONKEY!”

Since: Oct 08

Location hidden

#52257 Aug 27, 2013
Bottle Of Perfume

After being away on business, Tim thought it would be nice to bring his wife a little gift.

"How about some perfume?" he asked the cosmetics clerk.

She showed him a bottle costing $50.00.

"That's a bit much," said Tim, so she returned with a smaller bottle for $30.00.

"That's still quite a bit," Tim complained.

Growing annoyed, the clerk brought out a tiny $15.00 bottle.

"What I mean," said Tim, "is I'd like to see something really cheap."

The clerk handed him a mirror.

“ON TRAIL W / DONKEY!”

Since: Oct 08

Location hidden

#52258 Aug 27, 2013
A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead. He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years.
He wondered where the road was leading them....

After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, it was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight. When he was standing before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like Mother of Pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold.

He and the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side. When he was close enough, he called out, "Excuse me, where are we?"

"This is Heaven, sir," the man answered.

"Wow! Would you happen to have some water?" the man asked.

"Of course sir, Come right in, and I'll have some ice water brought right up" The man gestured, and the gate began to open.

"Can my friend," gesturing toward his dog, "come in, too?" the traveler asked. "I'm sorry sir, but we don't accept pets."

The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and continued the way he had been going with his dog. After another long walk, and at the top of another long hill, he came to a dirt road which led through a farm gate that looked as if it had never been closed.

There was no fence. As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book.

"Excuse me!" he called to the reader. "Do you have any water?"

"Yeah, sure, there's a pump over there". The man pointed to a place that couldn't be seen from outside the gate. "Come on in."

"How about my friend here?" the traveler gestured to the dog.

"There should be a bowl by the pump."

They went through the gate, and sure enough, there was an old fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it. The traveler filled the bowl and took a long drink himself, and then he gave some to the dog.

When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward the man who was standing by the tree waiting for them.

"What do you call this place?" the traveler asked.

"This is Heaven," was the answer.

"Why, that's confusing," the traveler said. "The man down the road said that was Heaven, too."

"Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates?

Nope. That's Hell."

"Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?"

"No. I can see how you might think so, but we're just happy that they screen out the folks who'll leave their best friends behind."

“TEXAS ... SECEDE”

Since: Feb 08

REPUBLIC OF TEXAS

#52260 Aug 27, 2013
Ruby88 wrote:
Morning everybody
Wishing all a good Tuesday :-)*hugs*
6202 - Bet a bottle of wine (Cabernet Souvignon)
Good day Ruby Tuesday ... wishing you the best of days ... have fun ...

1923 ... you win and get Delbert McClinton with 2 more bottles of wine ... yeah, baby ... with Marty Stuart, Lee Roy Parnell and friends ... dig it ...

“TEXAS ... SECEDE”

Since: Feb 08

REPUBLIC OF TEXAS

#52261 Aug 27, 2013
Good morning everyone ... I've missed yall ... a lot going on in Texas ... I lost a childhood friend of mine day before yesterday ... just like that, a snap of a finger, gone ... 56 y/o ... a graduate of University of Texas as a physicist AND Texas A&M as a chemist ... a Master Electrician and more ... he was a genius ... 3 years younger than I but had it not been for him ... I'd of not gotten through geometry, calculus, trig, and all the math thrown at me through all my years of college in order to get through it ... he was there when my mother passed away and I was there when his mom passed away ... 43 years of friendship and he was my little brothers friend ... RIP DR LARRY COOK 1957 - 2013 May he rest rest in Peace ...

As Pixie always "Cherish your loved ones"

Have a peaceful day and catch yall around the corner ... Love, FC <3 ...

Yo, Rotor!---> >mwah< lol ...

“Voters elect Big Bird”

Since: Jan 07

Dump American Eagle

#52262 Aug 27, 2013
Flower-Child wrote:
Good morning everyone ... I've missed yall ... a lot going on in Texas ... I lost a childhood friend of mine day before yesterday ... just like that, a snap of a finger, gone ... 56 y/o ... a graduate of University of Texas as a physicist AND Texas A&M as a chemist ... a Master Electrician and more ... he was a genius ... 3 years younger than I but had it not been for him ... I'd of not gotten through geometry, calculus, trig, and all the math thrown at me through all my years of college in order to get through it ... he was there when my mother passed away and I was there when his mom passed away ... 43 years of friendship and he was my little brothers friend ... RIP DR LARRY COOK 1957 - 2013 May he rest rest in Peace ...
As Pixie always "Cherish your loved ones"
Have a peaceful day and catch yall around the corner ... Love, FC <3 ...
Yo, Rotor!---> >mwah< lol ...
Condolences F/C. Its hard to lose life long friends. Remember them fondly. Think of them often and thank the Gods that be you knew them.

Okimar.

“268th Attack Hel Bn”

Since: May 07

AH-1S Cobra

#52263 Aug 27, 2013
Flower-Child wrote:
Good morning everyone ... I've missed yall ... a lot going on in Texas ... I lost a childhood friend of mine day before yesterday ... just like that, a snap of a finger, gone ... 56 y/o ... a graduate of University of Texas as a physicist AND Texas A&M as a chemist ... a Master Electrician and more ... he was a genius ... 3 years younger than I but had it not been for him ... I'd of not gotten through geometry, calculus, trig, and all the math thrown at me through all my years of college in order to get through it ... he was there when my mother passed away and I was there when his mom passed away ... 43 years of friendship and he was my little brothers friend ... RIP DR LARRY COOK 1957 - 2013 May he rest rest in Peace ...
As Pixie always "Cherish your loved ones"
Have a peaceful day and catch yall around the corner ... Love, FC <3 ...
Yo, Rotor!---> >mwah< lol ...
So sorry sweetie, big hugs.

“ Impulsive, bone in her teeth”

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#52264 Aug 28, 2013
Morning FC. Sorry to hear that. 56 is not old at all.
You said "Just like that.."
I do hope it was that painless for him.
Take care of yourself.
Ed

“Incorrupta fides, nudaque veri”

Since: May 07

Vincit qui se vincit

#52265 Aug 28, 2013
This morning I lucked out and was able to buy two boxes of ammo.

I placed the boxes on the front seat and headed back home, but stopped at a gas station where a drop-dead gorgeous blonde in a short skirt was filling up her car at the next pump.

She glanced at the two boxes of ammo, bent over and leaned in my passenger window, and said in a sexy voice, "I'm a big believer in barter, old fella. Would you be interested in trading sex for ammo?"

I thought for a few seconds and asked,

"What kind of ammo 'ya got?"

"Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle..."

“Incorrupta fides, nudaque veri”

Since: May 07

Vincit qui se vincit

#52266 Aug 28, 2013
Flower-Child wrote:
Good morning everyone ... I've missed yall ... a lot going on in Texas ... I lost a childhood friend of mine day before yesterday ... just like that, a snap of a finger, gone ... 56 y/o ... a graduate of University of Texas as a physicist AND Texas A&M as a chemist ... a Master Electrician and more ... he was a genius ... 3 years younger than I but had it not been for him ... I'd of not gotten through geometry, calculus, trig, and all the math thrown at me through all my years of college in order to get through it ... he was there when my mother passed away and I was there when his mom passed away ... 43 years of friendship and he was my little brothers friend ... RIP DR LARRY COOK 1957 - 2013 May he rest rest in Peace ...
As Pixie always "Cherish your loved ones"
Have a peaceful day and catch yall around the corner ... Love, FC <3 ...
Yo, Rotor!---> >mwah< lol ...
Sorry to hear that FC!

I lost a friend of mine a few months ago to stomach cancer, she was upset how she lived a pretty clean life and yet she was the one to get this? Anyway she was like the sister I never had and I could talk to her about anything and her passing touched me like none before, not even my family members made me feel like that, I can't explain it but yeah she was like a sister to me.

May he R.I.P.

“TEXAS ... SECEDE”

Since: Feb 08

REPUBLIC OF TEXAS

#52267 Aug 28, 2013
okimar wrote:
<quoted text>Condolences F/C. Its hard to lose life long friends. Remember them fondly. Think of them often and thank the Gods that be you knew them.
Okimar.
Thank you so much, Oki ... It means so much coming from you <3 ...

“TEXAS ... SECEDE”

Since: Feb 08

REPUBLIC OF TEXAS

#52268 Aug 28, 2013
Rotor Head wrote:
<quoted text>So sorry sweetie, big hugs.
Thanks, sweets >arms around you, too<

“TEXAS ... SECEDE”

Since: Feb 08

REPUBLIC OF TEXAS

#52269 Aug 28, 2013
Ed Teach wrote:
Morning FC. Sorry to hear that. 56 is not old at all.
You said "Just like that.."
I do hope it was that painless for him.
Take care of yourself.
Ed
Morning, Ed. Yes, he passed on in his sleep ... just awoke for that last breath in his wife's arm ... Thank you and you take care of you, too! >huggles<

“TEXAS ... SECEDE”

Since: Feb 08

REPUBLIC OF TEXAS

#52270 Aug 28, 2013
Ricky F wrote:
<quoted text>Sorry to hear that FC!
I lost a friend of mine a few months ago to stomach cancer, she was upset how she lived a pretty clean life and yet she was the one to get this? Anyway she was like the sister I never had and I could talk to her about anything and her passing touched me like none before, not even my family members made me feel like that, I can't explain it but yeah she was like a sister to me.
May he R.I.P.
Hi Ricky! I can totally relate when your friends or your friends family treat you better than your own family members treat you sometimes ... Sorry for your loss, too! Larry was a good man, 360 ... He's in good hands now ...

Thank you all for your condolences ... he will always hold a special place in my heart ... he was a very good friend to me and his parents were very good to me ... RIP LARRY RIP ...

Wishing all here a very beautiful day filled with love, laughter and sunshing ... FC <3 ...

“Faith Love Hope”

Since: Nov 10

South Africa

#52271 Aug 29, 2013
FC - So sorry to hear about your good friend's passing. May he rest in peace.*Hugs*

----------

Afternoon everyone. Already mid-day here. Been nice and warm the last few days, but there's a cold front heading inland so we can't pack away our Winter clothes just yet

“268th Attack Hel Bn”

Since: May 07

AH-1S Cobra

#52272 Aug 29, 2013
Morning everyone.
Welp, I had all three of my classes now. Electrical Technology is going to be the PITA. It's this guys very first class.....and he's from IBM.
NOOB!!!!!!

“ Impulsive, bone in her teeth”

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#52273 Aug 29, 2013
Flower-Child wrote:
<quoted text>
Morning, Ed. Yes, he passed on in his sleep ... just awoke for that last breath in his wife's arm ... Thank you and you take care of you, too! >huggles<
Hugs back.
Off to the museum today. try to finish the guns for the F-11

“Faith Love Hope”

Since: Nov 10

South Africa

#52274 Aug 29, 2013
Good morning and happy Friday everybody! TGIF

“ Impulsive, bone in her teeth”

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#52275 Aug 30, 2013
Voyeur wrote:
Bottle Of Perfume
After being away on business, Tim thought it would be nice to bring his wife a little gift.
"How about some perfume?" he asked the cosmetics clerk.
She showed him a bottle costing $50.00.
"That's a bit much," said Tim, so she returned with a smaller bottle for $30.00.
"That's still quite a bit," Tim complained.
Growing annoyed, the clerk brought out a tiny $15.00 bottle.
"What I mean," said Tim, "is I'd like to see something really cheap."
The clerk handed him a mirror.
I happened to run into that pilot yesterday. By the way, the Cherokee 180 is called the Archer now. anyway he had these other words of wisdom for you.
Sky is good, earth is bad. Nobody ever collided with the sky.
Stay away from clouds, that silver lining just may be another plane.
Everybody have a safe week-end.
1799, THAT was a fun year.

“268th Attack Hel Bn”

Since: May 07

AH-1S Cobra

#52276 Aug 30, 2013
Morning everyone.
Have a safe long weekend!

“100% Princess”

Since: Jan 07

and totally harmless

#52277 Aug 30, 2013
Hi everyone. Ditto to Rotor's greeting.

Tell me when this thread is updated:

Subscribe Now Add to my Tracker

Add your comments below

Characters left: 4000

Please note by submitting this form you acknowledge that you have read the Terms of Service and the comment you are posting is in compliance with such terms. Be polite. Inappropriate posts may be removed by the moderator. Send us your feedback.

Top Stories Discussions

Title Updated Last By Comments
Jehovah's Witnesses are true disciple of Jesus ... (Mar '07) 11 min RiccardoFire 46,194
Bush is a hero (Sep '07) 13 min RiccardoFire 184,746
The Christian Atheist debate (Jun '15) 41 min Catcher1 110,267
snapchat dirty pics shemale (May '14) 59 min Cali4real12 30
News Plurality of Americans think Trump is failing 1 hr Bongo 12
News Roman Catholic church only true church, says Va... (Jul '07) 1 hr President DonJ Trump 675,587
Prove there's a god. (Mar '08) 4 hr waaasssuuup 982,210
More from around the web