Why Should Jesus Love Me?

Satan is the one true god

Since: Aug 13

Las Vegas, NV

#569860 Aug 9, 2013
trifecta1 wrote:
<quoted text>is that what homosexual men--males sexually attracted to other makes do, "Satan is the one true god"? that's what they do huh?
ask your dad aka your mom's brother....

“Pillars of Creation....”

Since: Jan 11

Into this world we're thrown

#569861 Aug 9, 2013
macumazahn wrote:
<quoted text>That scam's been worked before, mostly at larger disasters. Plane crashes and such.
Where's her wallet?
1 vote for ficton.....

What does her wallet have to do with it?

“Pillars of Creation....”

Since: Jan 11

Into this world we're thrown

#569862 Aug 9, 2013
Epiphany2 wrote:
<quoted text>
Beautiful.....A lot more critters out here.....LOL
Have a great day
:-)
its nice to get away from all the hustle and bustle of the city........

“BE BRAVE ENOUGH ”

Since: Oct 09

TO STEP IN MUD PUDDLES

#569863 Aug 9, 2013
Epiphany2 wrote:
<quoted text>
LOL....I don't want him.... thanks anyway
Its funny....you expressed your opinion to him about what he said to me...and he comes DOWN on you (calling you names and talks about your prayers)....Doesn't sound very stable, does he?
I am not a far better person than you are.....You are a wonderful...caring and loving person. No one is better than anyone else.
L-8-TR
Ya think LW will take him??? LOL

“Pillars of Creation....”

Since: Jan 11

Into this world we're thrown

#569864 Aug 9, 2013
AnnieJ wrote:
<quoted text>
Ya think LW will take him??? LOL
She'll take him to the woodshed.........

“I.Spirit.Son.God”

Since: Jan 12

Location hidden

#569865 Aug 9, 2013
Satan is the one true god wrote:
<quoted text>
ask your dad aka your mom's brother....
I asking you "Satan is the one true god" You make the claim, so I asking you.

“H-o-o-o-o-o-o-ld on thar!”

Since: Sep 08

The Borderland of Sol

#569866 Aug 9, 2013
Rider on the Storm wrote:
<quoted text>
1 vote for ficton.....
What does her wallet have to do with it?
People claiming to be priests or reverends have been known to rip off valuta from disaster victims before now.

“BE BRAVE ENOUGH ”

Since: Oct 09

TO STEP IN MUD PUDDLES

#569867 Aug 9, 2013
Rider on the Storm wrote:
<quoted text>
She'll take him to the woodshed.........
I get the feeling he might like that!
Neb Senu

Upper Darby, PA

#569868 Aug 9, 2013
Imhotep wrote:
<quoted text>
Still trying to catch Hatshepsut for a date!
I found errors in the book of the dead.
Fine thank you... and you?
Wilson's Nails
Wilson runs a nail factory and decides his business needs a bit of advertising. He has a chat with a friend who works in marketing and he offers to make a TV ad for Wilson's Nails.
"Give me a week," says the friend, "and I'll be back with a tape."
A week goes by and the marketing executive comes to see Wilson. He puts a cassette in the video and presses play. A Roman soldier is busy nailing Jesus to the cross. He turns to face the camera and says with a grin "Use Wilson's Nails, they'll hold anything."
Wilson goes mad shouting: "What is the matter with you? They'll never show that on TV. Give it another try, but no more Romans crucifying Jesus!"
Another week goes by and the marketing man comes back to see Wilson with another tape. He puts it in the machine and hits play. This time the camera pans out from a Roman standing with his arms folded to show Jesus on the cross. The Roman looks up at him and says 'Wilson's Nails, they'll hold anything'.
Wilson is beside himself. "You don't understand: I don't want anything with Jesus on the cross! Now listen, I'll give you one last chance. Come back in a week with an advertisement that I can broadcast."
A week passes and Wilson waits impatiently. The marketing executive arrives and puts on the new video. A naked man with long hair, gasping for breath, is running across a field. About a dozen Roman soldiers come over the hill, hot on his trail. One of them turns to camera and says 'If only we had used Wilson's Nails!'.
Oh yeah!
Hatshepsut is hot.
Maybe she's just trying to play hard to get.

Don't give up. I'm sure that you'll eventually score with her within the next 4,000 years lol.

I've been fine.
Still in the priesthood business.
Im tired of listening to confessions though, lol. I was thinking about leaving but where am I gonna get another comfy job with full medical benefits.

You say that you found flaws in the Book Of The Dead?
Oh no!
But King Rootin Tootin and Queen Hotsie Totsie are the ones who authorized it.
Imhotep

Deltona, FL

#569869 Aug 9, 2013
It aint necessarily so wrote:
I wanted to share a recent email exchange between a close buddy of mine since high school
========
mitigated the huge Bush failures.
Somebody should come up with a hypothesis for how that happened. How does a nation go from so competent to so incompetent in a generation or two? A run of bad luck?
Anyway, how 'bout them Dodgers!
Long time no see.Doc!

How about this?

The problem with the politicians and the government is the QUALITY of the voters.

The entire government is OWNED, yes OWNED, by corporations and the super rich. All candidates are pre-selected by their puppet masters, that not only control their strings, but 90% of all the money used to put them in office.

The USA is an Oligarchy and has been for almost 30+ years beginning with Reaganomics.

At last, with the advent, of Fox News, et. al., we now can see clearly the process, and the Middle Class is not part of it in any way.

With some luck... some will do great, others will be and are desperate.

Lincoln said “a nation divided against itself cannot endure”... how long will this government endure?

George sums up our oligarchy perfectly...

http://m.youtube.com/watch...
Neb Senu

Upper Darby, PA

#569870 Aug 9, 2013
Imhotep wrote:
<quoted text>
Wilson's Nails
Wilson runs a nail factory and decides his business needs a bit of advertising. He has a chat with a friend who works in marketing and he offers to make a TV ad for Wilson's Nails.
"Give me a week," says the friend, "and I'll be back with a tape."
A week goes by and the marketing executive comes to see Wilson. He puts a cassette in the video and presses play. A Roman soldier is busy nailing Jesus to the cross. He turns to face the camera and says with a grin "Use Wilson's Nails, they'll hold anything."
Wilson goes mad shouting: "What is the matter with you? They'll never show that on TV. Give it another try, but no more Romans crucifying Jesus!"
Another week goes by and the marketing man comes back to see Wilson with another tape. He puts it in the machine and hits play. This time the camera pans out from a Roman standing with his arms folded to show Jesus on the cross. The Roman looks up at him and says 'Wilson's Nails, they'll hold anything'.
Wilson is beside himself. "You don't understand: I don't want anything with Jesus on the cross! Now listen, I'll give you one last chance. Come back in a week with an advertisement that I can broadcast."
A week passes and Wilson waits impatiently. The marketing executive arrives and puts on the new video. A naked man with long hair, gasping for breath, is running across a field. About a dozen Roman soldiers come over the hill, hot on his trail. One of them turns to camera and says 'If only we had used Wilson's Nails!'.
LOL, oh man!
That was heavy.
You do know that you just made the fundie 'Going Straight To Hell' top 10 list, don't you?

“"None shall pass"”

Since: Jul 11

There

#569871 Aug 9, 2013
Humans have been producing babies without a sex act for the last 6o years.

We surely are Gods.
Skombolis wrote:
<quoted text>
There was no sex act and it was consensual.
The entire idea of the VIRGIN birth is that Mary was a VIRGIN who despite never having sex, miraculously was able to give birth to a child.
If God can create a universe and people without a sex act, surely he would be capable of creating a single child within Mary
Later on today I will explain the difference between dog food and people food. I will give you a bit of a sneak peak. It helps to look at the pictures. But all that and more will be a little later on. Be sure to tune in
Monday I will teach you what order to close the toilet bowl lid in. It will be called "before or after?"
I am here to help you Karl:)

“ Ah see's lanlubbers Cap'n BT!”

Since: Oct 10

Location hidden

#569872 Aug 9, 2013
RiversideHick wrote:
<quoted text>
Well then, you have your answers.
One may find the answer(s) to the original question, but it usually raises even more, so no, I don't have all the answers...just a better knowledge and understanding.
Neb Senu

Upper Darby, PA

#569873 Aug 9, 2013
Imhotep wrote:
<quoted text>
Still trying to catch Hatshepsut for a date!
I found errors in the book of the dead.
Fine thank you... and you?
Wilson's Nails
Wilson runs a nail factory and decides his business needs a bit of advertising. He has a chat with a friend who works in marketing and he offers to make a TV ad for Wilson's Nails.
"Give me a week," says the friend, "and I'll be back with a tape."
A week goes by and the marketing executive comes to see Wilson. He puts a cassette in the video and presses play. A Roman soldier is busy nailing Jesus to the cross. He turns to face the camera and says with a grin "Use Wilson's Nails, they'll hold anything."
Wilson goes mad shouting: "What is the matter with you? They'll never show that on TV. Give it another try, but no more Romans crucifying Jesus!"
Another week goes by and the marketing man comes back to see Wilson with another tape. He puts it in the machine and hits play. This time the camera pans out from a Roman standing with his arms folded to show Jesus on the cross. The Roman looks up at him and says 'Wilson's Nails, they'll hold anything'.
Wilson is beside himself. "You don't understand: I don't want anything with Jesus on the cross! Now listen, I'll give you one last chance. Come back in a week with an advertisement that I can broadcast."
A week passes and Wilson waits impatiently. The marketing executive arrives and puts on the new video. A naked man with long hair, gasping for breath, is running across a field. About a dozen Roman soldiers come over the hill, hot on his trail. One of them turns to camera and says 'If only we had used Wilson's Nails!'.
Hey, I got one for you.

A fella goes out and buys a brand new car and decides that he wants it blessed.
He then consulted a catholic priest, a fundie minister and a jewish rabbi.

The catholic priest says a few 'hail marys' does the sign of the cross and then walks around the car a few times with his bucket of incense. Then he stopped, lifted his arms up into the air and looked into the heavens. Then shouted:
"It's okay to be gay".

Next the fundie preached a forty five minute sermon, along the same lines as John Hagee, and when he finished he made a plea for donations to keep his Sword Of The Lord ministry afloat.

Finally it was the jew's turn. The rabbi proceeded to the rear of the vehicle and started to bop his head back and forth while reciting from the torah. After he finished he pulled out a set of metal shears from his pocket, leaned over and snipped off a piece of the tailpipe.
Neb Senu

Upper Darby, PA

#569874 Aug 9, 2013
Imhotep wrote:
<quoted text>
You are too easy to amuse!
Enjoy ;)
The drunk in the cathedral
A drunk staggered down the main street of the town. Somehow he managed to make it up the stairs to a cathedral and into the entrance, where he crashed from pew to pew, finally making his way to a side aisle and into a confessional.
A priest had observed all this, and figured the fellow needed some help, so he entered his side of the confessional. After the priest sat there in deathly silence, he finally asked, "May I help you, my son?"
"I dunno," came the drunk's voice from behind the partition. "You got any paper on your side?"
More?
http://www.nobeliefs.com/jokes.htm
Ha ha, love it.
Thanks for the website.

“Rainbow: God's covenant ”

Since: May 07

Clearwater, FL

#569875 Aug 9, 2013
macumazahn wrote:
<quoted text>That scam's been worked before, mostly at larger disasters. Plane crashes and such.
Where's her wallet?
In Obama's hands.

“"None shall pass"”

Since: Jul 11

There

#569876 Aug 9, 2013
RiversideHick wrote:
<quoted text>
"even is"?!
HA HA HA!!!
In English talk, that should be "even are".
Stupid.
I will take my English errors over your total ignorance any day of the week.
Neb Senu

Upper Darby, PA

#569877 Aug 9, 2013
Dr shrink wrote:
<quoted text>
o ty durnj serpskij pijawka twoj Boh is karadzitz and zdechlyj milosevich
ty jobana serpskaja kurwa bez Boha
Nowhere have i said that I'm without a god.
Anyways, what are you doing back here from the moon, pipek?

“Rainbow: God's covenant ”

Since: May 07

Clearwater, FL

#569878 Aug 9, 2013
BenAdam wrote:
<quoted text>
You are still an idiot.
Do you even know what genes and DNA even is ?
Same as ever. Pity that.

Catcher1

Since: Sep 10

Fremont, CA

#569879 Aug 9, 2013
RiversideHick wrote:
<quoted text>
Give her my regards.
Tell her she's my hero.
...please
I will.

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