The real reason no one can find the A...

The real reason no one can find the Ark? A rampant case of crabs.

There are 95 comments on the news.bbc.co.uk story from Nov 11, 2009, titled The real reason no one can find the Ark? A rampant case of crabs.. In it, news.bbc.co.uk reports that:

Deep under the ocean, there is a species of crab that eats trees. The crab survives by eating wood that has sunk to the ocean floor, comprising trunks and leaves swept into the sea, as well as the odd shipwreck.

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“Shaggin' Wagon.”

Since: Apr 09

Springfield, MA

#1 Nov 12, 2009
Cmon.....This will attract the ire of the bible bangers.

“Wear white at night.”

Since: Jun 09

Albuquerque, NM

#2 Nov 12, 2009
Genesis 8:1 "And God remembered Noah, and every living thing, and all the cattle that was with him in the ark."

Creeping senile dementia?
Mr Obvious

United States

#3 Nov 12, 2009
Or perhaps because it never existed?

“There is no such thing”

Since: May 08

as a reasonable person

#4 Nov 12, 2009
Noodly James wrote:
Cmon.....This will attract the ire of the bible bangers.
The real reason bible bangers are crabby is from all of the paper cuts on their nethers.

“Shaggin' Wagon.”

Since: Apr 09

Springfield, MA

#5 Nov 13, 2009
Lil Ticked wrote:
<quoted text>The real reason bible bangers are crabby is from all of the paper cuts on their nethers.
(snort)
Sheila

Texarkana, TX

#6 Nov 13, 2009
Noodly James wrote:
<quoted text>
(snort)
Somebody wake me up when we get there.
nina

Ottawa, Canada

#7 Nov 16, 2009
underwater crabs eating the ark that's supposedly inside that rock formation on the Turkish mountain?

wow, the fairy tales never cease

“a Jedi craves not these things”

Since: Sep 09

Rogers, AR

#8 Nov 17, 2009
I didn't read the crappy article. What is it about, getting wood or crabs or something?
Captain A

Phoenix, AZ

#9 Nov 17, 2009
and life on earth magically appears!!! Nope, with no GOD at all...Shazaaam!!!
MIDutch

Waterford, MI

#10 Nov 17, 2009
So, have the "creationists" actually found the big wooden boat yet? Doesn't their "science textbook" tell them EXACTLY where to look?

Heck, science can find homes, wooden cooking utensils, furniture, small wooden toys from antiquity that were "miraculously" saved without a trace of water damage from the flood while their owners were all out getting drowned and all, but the largest wooden structure ever built by man, a wooden boat the size of an aircraft carrier, somehow can't be found?

The "creationists" must not be trying very hard.
MIDutch

Waterford, MI

#11 Nov 17, 2009
Did I mention that "creationism" has been around since Noah and the kids got off of the big wooden boat and has been UNABLE to find any scientific evidence of any "kind".

4000+ years. Zero, zip, zilch, nil, nada, nothing.

nmweatherman

“l'enfer, c'est les autres”

Since: Jul 09

Location hidden

#12 Nov 17, 2009
The world's oldest known boat, built 7,000 years ago out of tarry, bitumen-covered slabs, has been found in an unlikely place: the Kuwaiti desert.
If the assessment of British and Kuwaiti archaeologists is correct, the slabs, found covered on one side with barnacles and warehoused in a stone building at a site called As-Sabiyah, would push back the date for the oldest known boat by more than 2,000 years.

According to an upcoming paper in the Proceedings of the Seminar for Arabian Studies and a paper published in the June 7 issue of the journal Science, the current oldest boat record-holder is a vessel found in an Egyptian tomb dating to 3,000 B.C. Evidence for log canoes, thought to be more like rafts than boats, goes back much further, to 8,000 B.C. The age of the entire As-Sabiyah site, including the boat remains, has been carbon-14 dated to 5,511-5,324 B.C.

Robert Carter, an archaeologist at University College London and the expedition's field director, believes that the slabs belonged to a boat because they have reed impressions on one side and barnacles on the other.

Carter said bitumen, which is still crushed with fish oil and coral and used today by some Middle Eastern boat builders, likely formed a waterproof seal around vessels constructed out of reed bundles tied together with ropes and string.

He also believes that the bitumen-covered reed boats were used to carry people and goods between Mesopotamia, As-Sabiyah (which he thinks was then a peninsula within the Tigris-Euphrates River area), and the Central Gulf region.

==========

Boat-building was well-known in the ancient world. Noah could be an allegory told by a tribal story-teller. Noah may have escaped a flood in his Iraqi-style round boat, with his family and (most of) his animals. I read a lot of the Bible, especially the Old Testament, as allegories from ancient story-tellers.

Since: Dec 06

Saint Petersburg, FL

#13 Nov 17, 2009
Captain A wrote:
and life on earth magically appears!!! Nope, with no GOD at all...Shazaaam!!!
You seem to be confused. That's not magic, it's natural process. Now that some super-powerful, eternal daddy fairy in the sky just poofed everything into existence...that's magic!
mrbananas

Amherst, MA

#14 Nov 17, 2009
the biggest problem i have with the flood is, did no one else besides Noah have a boat? their must have been fishers out a sea during the exact moment the flood began. other people could have run for boats.

heck no doubt Noah's neighbor saw Noah building a giant ark and not wanting to be outdone he decided to build his own boat, even bigger and better than Noah's. and then the whole neighbor hood got into a giant competition to see who would have the fanciest boat. The same thing happens with cars, TVs and christmas decorations, why not boats?

“a Jedi craves not these things”

Since: Sep 09

Rogers, AR

#15 Nov 17, 2009
mrbananas wrote:
the biggest problem i have with the flood is, did no one else besides Noah have a boat? their must have been fishers out a sea during the exact moment the flood began. other people could have run for boats.
heck no doubt Noah's neighbor saw Noah building a giant ark and not wanting to be outdone he decided to build his own boat, even bigger and better than Noah's. and then the whole neighbor hood got into a giant competition to see who would have the fanciest boat. The same thing happens with cars, TVs and christmas decorations, why not boats?
I am not an expert but I believe that the whole thing was really about the SIZE of Noah's Ark, because it was so huge that it withstood the rain & terrible waves which sank everything else. All of his neighbors thought he was insane and would not copy him (they made fun of him) Of course it is a BS story anyway, but I think that was the idea.

The most awesome thing about Noah is that he is the first alcoholic ever recorded in "history" and perhaps the longest living one too!:-)
The Dude

Wallasey, UK

#16 Nov 17, 2009
mrbananas wrote:
the biggest problem i have with the flood is, did no one else besides Noah have a boat? their must have been fishers out a sea during the exact moment the flood began. other people could have run for boats.
Ah yes, but there boats weren't made out of the strongest material known to man - uh, I mean god! GOPHER WOOD!!!

“a Jedi craves not these things”

Since: Sep 09

Rogers, AR

#17 Nov 17, 2009
The Dude wrote:
<quoted text>
Ah yes, but there boats weren't made out of the strongest material known to man - uh, I mean god! GOPHER WOOD!!!
True, I forgot about that. Gopher wood plus God was protecting them anyway. God pretty much just flushed everyone else down the toilet.

“Quantum Junctn: Use Both Lanes”

Since: Dec 06

Tulsa, Oklahoma USofA

#18 Nov 17, 2009
There was a lovely special on Nat Geo channel about the supposed ark last week.

It was pretty good-- the scientists were easily able to explain the junk-nonsense put forth by the creonuts.

I especially enjoyed the model-ark in a wave-tank.

Being an unpowered boat, when waves began (as would happen in a massive deluge) such boats/ships always turn sideways to the waves eventually.

As soon as that happens....*ker-plunk* under it goes...

I also was amused at the length of time Noah supposedly build this behemoth--

-- as the special demonstrated, it took an expert in hand-hewing planks 10 hours to fasten two 6 foot planks together....

...the whole ark would've taken Noah and his sons hundreds of years... or more.

What's worse?

It would've leaked like a sieve-- the bigger a boat/ship, the more it's planks flex against each other-- and leak.

One of the many limiting factors in ancient boat-building....

On and on.

Even *with* magically strong "gopher wood" Noah did not possess the technology to make it seaworthy.

I'da sunk like a stone within minutes....

“a Jedi craves not these things”

Since: Sep 09

Rogers, AR

#19 Nov 17, 2009
Bob of Quantum-Faith wrote:
There was a lovely special on Nat Geo channel about the supposed ark last week.
It was pretty good-- the scientists were easily able to explain the junk-nonsense put forth by the creonuts.
I especially enjoyed the model-ark in a wave-tank.
Being an unpowered boat, when waves began (as would happen in a massive deluge) such boats/ships always turn sideways to the waves eventually.
As soon as that happens....*ker-plunk* under it goes...
I also was amused at the length of time Noah supposedly build this behemoth--
-- as the special demonstrated, it took an expert in hand-hewing planks 10 hours to fasten two 6 foot planks together....
...the whole ark would've taken Noah and his sons hundreds of years... or more.
What's worse?
It would've leaked like a sieve-- the bigger a boat/ship, the more it's planks flex against each other-- and leak.
One of the many limiting factors in ancient boat-building....
On and on.
Even *with* magically strong "gopher wood" Noah did not possess the technology to make it seaworthy.
I'da sunk like a stone within minutes....
That's interesting, I will keep an eye out for that show. I Googled the "Gopher Wood" thing and researchers are trying to say that it may be a mis-translation in the Bible (like THAT hasn't happened before!) and instead of "Gopher" it may be a Hebrew word that means "pitched wood".

Even though I am not a member of the "big Bible Fan Club", I do dig Noah and in his defense he had plenty of time to build the Ark. He was around 600 years old when the flood started (lived to be 950). I think it actually DID take hundreds of years, LOL.
Dog

Ennezat, France

#20 Nov 18, 2009
Captain A wrote:
and life on earth magically appears!!! Nope, with no GOD at all...Shazaaam!!!
Yup. That's about it. It's not magic, though, just biology and science.

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