The Book of the Bible titled "Directo...

The Book of the Bible titled "Directors."

Posted in the Druid Forum

Christmas

Englewood, CO

#1 Dec 23, 2009
Greetings from the king of gods and his son Jesus Christ.

Hello! Because of the uniqueness of my name, regardless of factors like wealth or the lack thereof, I am a social cornerstone. Many people big and small use me as a stepping stone. It doesn't hurt getting stepped on, it just took a little getting used to. I compare getting stepped on to giving presents. That way, I am always giving when I get stepped on. This brings me to 'Madonna's propers.'

In my adventures I come across a great many psychics and telepaths that anticipate my path and honor me by interacting with me. Madonna is one of those psychics. Here is a recount of one of my experiances with the goddess Madonna.

The day was a fog I don't remember it well, however, the night was a different story. It was a dream.... A text message machine fades in from black. It was a two way chat line with Madonna. She had read my book and had some ideas about the use of my "Symbolic Theory." She asked me a series of questions as the text machine skipped from window to window. One question stood out. She asked me about sin yes or no? I said no out of practical guidance. Sinning tends to get people in trouble. This is not to say that I don't sin, I'm just careful about my sins. However, I think Madonna was under the impression that I was saying that I didn't sin at all. Then suddenly, my fingers didn't work and Madonna skipped ahead of me. I then found myself listening to Madonna's lyric "My baby has a secret." So I set the record straight.

Despite the fact that I was given a holy name I'm no holy man. It was never intended for me to be a holy man. I am a beast of burden, it was not my fate to be a holy man. I'm just the church's fall guy, if you know what I mean.

Since we're on the topic of setting the record straight, the Chris-teens wanted to know if I was a giant. Being a Chris-tall-ball it was pre-destined that I would be a giant, however, leave it to the dirt behind the church to leave a trap for me if I called myself a giant. You see, in some very secret circles all the Giants are gay so to call myself a giant would be like calling myself gay - and that's the trap. Again, another example of getting stepped on this time by the church of gays. The reality is dispite the marketing spin, I'm not gay. That's one of those sins I avoid. Aman.
Prof Edward Ion Benton

Englewood, CO

#2 Dec 26, 2009
CHAPTER 2
So they gathered around the marble gate of the new Heavan to see with their own eye more exotic than gold. At birth I was given the name, Christmas Siletz Benton, I am known by other names amoung them, Professor Edward Ion Benton, Christopher Chris Benton, Christopher Edward Benton, and Christmas Smiths Clinton. I am the 'Captain of God's Royal Gaurd.' Amoung my credentials are as follows; Special Forces I faced death and lived, I emerged flying the emblem called Cyclops a name given to me by a rock, I wrote a very influential book titled "BRAZILIA!!! Cyclops Looms," I am a Pacific Coast college educated scientist amoung the colleges that I have attended are the University of California Berkeley and California Polytechnic State University San Luis Obispo, I served as Tinkerbell the fairy's bodygaurd and convinced God to let her into heavan and I would have let her stay had she remained humble, I have seated empresses amoung them the Italian Professor Fiorella Terenzi and the American Leslie Griffith, I wore Pink Floyd out at waring, here, before your eyes, I have toppled Zeus off his thrown and finally, I am a Druid.
I started out a young scientist named, Christoper Chris Benton, I did not believe in magic and I did not believe in God and I had changed my name in an attempt to escape my Christian burden. National Defence made me a War Scientist. I did not believe in God, yet I was objective so I started with the premis 'If God does exist' and I proceeded to wage war on a being in an effort to defend my space. My war forced God to reconize me, and I stood my ground in the process earning the hard fought skills qualifying me for captain of God's Royal Gaurd.
This will be known as the lost book of the Bible for inevidable it will be burried. However, it was written. I invite you to join the Royal Gaurd. Cast your spell in the name of the King of gods and his son Jesus Christ. Be mindful, your words are Biblical so be thoughful as I know Druids always are. Title your donations "CHAPTER" and the number in sequence. You don't have to number your paragraphs, however, if your donation is exceptionally long it might be a good idea. Soundoff! And be counted amoung the elite of secret society on Earth as it is in Heavan.

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