Since: Mar 11

Chicago, IL

#22 Jan 26, 2013
Always flip through the bible and lift the mattress. As a kid I once lifted the mattress and found $300 stashed there! I left the room service chick $100 tip got a hug and coupons for a free stay for that :)
Reason Personified wrote:
<quoted text>Damn, I am going to have to look inside them from now on.

“Citizen_Patriot_ Voter_Atheist!”

Since: May 09

Earth,TX

#23 Jan 26, 2013
Givemeliberty wrote:
Always flip through the bible and lift the mattress. As a kid I once lifted the mattress and found $300 stashed there! I left the room service chick $100 tip got a hug and coupons for a free stay for that :)
<quoted text>
Wow! All I do ever is check to see if the shower, toilet and bed linens are clean

Since: Mar 11

Louisville, KY

#24 Jan 27, 2013
I made hundreds on the porn mags and movies I would find hidden under mattresses! Many still in the plastic and not even opened! Quite an entrepreneur when I was in middle school with those :D
Reason Personified wrote:
<quoted text>Wow! All I do ever is check to see if the shower, toilet and bed linens are clean
Siro

Australia

#25 Jan 27, 2013
Givemeliberty wrote:
That is awesome! I always check the bible in hotel rooms because people often forget money there :)
<quoted text>
Yo! gibsme dat!
Thinking

Yeovil, UK

#26 Feb 9, 2013
The bible contains more filth and depravity but is a far more challenging wank.
Givemeliberty wrote:
I made hundreds on the porn mags and movies I would find hidden under mattresses! Many still in the plastic and not even opened! Quite an entrepreneur when I was in middle school with those :D
<quoted text>

“Quantum Junctn: Use Both Lanes”

Since: Dec 06

Tulsa, Oklahoma USofA

#28 Feb 9, 2013
Givemeliberty wrote:
I made hundreds on the porn mags and movies I would find hidden under mattresses! Many still in the plastic and not even opened! Quite an entrepreneur when I was in middle school with those :D
<quoted text>
I'll remember that trick.

Back in the day, I used to know any number of folk who enjoyed the "weed" now and again (as it were).

I used to take the gideon bibles to give to those people--they loved the fine pages for rolling papers.

To use the bible as toilet paper? You have to crush it into a ball, then smooth it out-- repeat several times and it's much more friendly on the skin (and absorbs better too).

Of course, when camping, the gideon bible makes for excellent kindling.

And it also cleans glass quite well-- again, crush it first. You can even use the covers as a cushion around luggage handles that have become worn.

Since: Mar 11

United States

#29 Feb 10, 2013
Well I used a KJV to wipe with it had flakey smooth soft pages. Decent enough but the Quran is fantastic to wipe your @ss with! Seriously nothin wipes your booty clean like the words of the prophet.

Far superior to the leading bible brand.
Bob of Quantum-Faith wrote:
<quoted text>
I'll remember that trick.
Back in the day, I used to know any number of folk who enjoyed the "weed" now and again (as it were).
I used to take the gideon bibles to give to those people--they loved the fine pages for rolling papers.
To use the bible as toilet paper? You have to crush it into a ball, then smooth it out-- repeat several times and it's much more friendly on the skin (and absorbs better too).
Of course, when camping, the gideon bible makes for excellent kindling.
And it also cleans glass quite well-- again, crush it first. You can even use the covers as a cushion around luggage handles that have become worn.
Siro

Sydney, Australia

#30 Feb 10, 2013
I bought a dawkins book the other day.....
at a buck a roll and in 2 ply.
Its not worth it though, when I wipe my arse with a page it puts more crap on it than takes it off
Thinking

Yeovil, UK

#31 Feb 10, 2013
You're still not toilet trained. Sort that out and you may be less of a pariah.
Siro wrote:
I bought a dawkins book the other day.....
at a buck a roll and in 2 ply.
Its not worth it though, when I wipe my arse with a page it puts more crap on it than takes it off
Lincoln

United States

#32 Mar 22, 2013
Bob of Quantum-Faith wrote:
<quoted text>
I'll remember that trick.
Back in the day, I used to know any number of folk who enjoyed the "weed" now and again (as it were).
I used to take the gideon bibles to give to those people--they loved the fine pages for rolling papers.
To use the bible as toilet paper? You have to crush it into a ball, then smooth it out-- repeat several times and it's much more friendly on the skin (and absorbs better too).
Of course, when camping, the gideon bible makes for excellent kindling.
And it also cleans glass quite well-- again, crush it first. You can even use the covers as a cushion around luggage handles that have become worn.
wonder if these youthful activities are going to jeopardize your job washing dishes at the restaurant.
Jimmy

London, UK

#33 Mar 22, 2013
Siro wrote:
I bought a dawkins book the other day.....
at a buck a roll and in 2 ply.
Its not worth it though, when I wipe my arse with a page it puts more crap on it than takes it off
that's normal, atheism usually makes ignorant theists sh*t themselves.
Siro

Sydney, Australia

#34 Mar 23, 2013
Jimmy wrote:
<quoted text>
that's normal, atheism usually makes ignorant theists sh*t themselves.
The dawkins paper was pre-stained, after all he probably felt that you tirds would relate to it more.
.
Apart from that.....I think a worthwhile campaign should come about to have 'toilet paper' renamed 'dawkins paper' for like a dawkins book the only thing you see after you open it up is a mashed up crap picture of things.
Jimmy

London, UK

#35 Mar 23, 2013
Siro wrote:
<quoted text>
The dawkins paper was pre-stained, after all he probably felt that you tirds would relate to it more.
.
Apart from that.....I think a worthwhile campaign should come about to have 'toilet paper' renamed 'dawkins paper' for like a dawkins book the only thing you see after you open it up is a mashed up crap picture of things.
Thanks for proving to us that a book on atheism:

1. Made you sh*t yourself
2. Was a poor substitute for toilet paper

I'll let you set yourself up for another insult...

“Citizen_Patriot_ Voter_Atheist!”

Since: May 09

Earth,TX

#36 Mar 23, 2013
Siro wrote:
<quoted text>
The dawkins paper was pre-stained, after all he probably felt that you tirds would relate to it more.
.
Apart from that.....I think a worthwhile campaign should come about to have 'toilet paper' renamed 'dawkins paper' for like a dawkins book the only thing you see after you open it up is a mashed up crap picture of things.
You are it's target audience, and of course it was stained. Everything at the church jumble sales is always stained.

Speaking of target audiences, though they contain much of value, we atheist need no instruction, cheerleaders, nor messiahs in either becoming nor in staying atheist, and those books are lures for those among your ilk who are actually capable still of some independent thought processes, and for the rest of you, they are the forbidden titillation that makes you all squirrely, like you are now.

You have done something bad haven't you? Time to pray for forgiveness.

Dawkin's books, or for that matter even these topix postings used as T.P. could free a million more religitards a year. All that time spent in the john would finally become a beneficial experience for you lot. And we both know all Christain children should be able to question the Sunday school teachers as to why a god would want them to be eaten by their parents.

It would be your teenagers who would be leaving enmass, for it is they who are most resistent to the bullshit that is religion. Oh wait, they already are leaving, never mind. Carry on as you were.
Jimmy

London, UK

#37 Mar 24, 2013
Reason Personified wrote:
<quoted text>You are it's target audience, and of course it was stained. Everything at the church jumble sales is always stained.
Speaking of target audiences, though they contain much of value, we atheist need no instruction, cheerleaders, nor messiahs in either becoming nor in staying atheist, and those books are lures for those among your ilk who are actually capable still of some independent thought processes, and for the rest of you, they are the forbidden titillation that makes you all squirrely, like you are now.
You have done something bad haven't you? Time to pray for forgiveness.
Dawkin's books, or for that matter even these topix postings used as T.P. could free a million more religitards a year. All that time spent in the john would finally become a beneficial experience for you lot. And we both know all Christain children should be able to question the Sunday school teachers as to why a god would want them to be eaten by their parents.
It would be your teenagers who would be leaving enmass, for it is they who are most resistent to the bullshit that is religion. Oh wait, they already are leaving, never mind. Carry on as you were.
Religion thrives on controlling young and ignorant minds. It is the ignorant and downtrodden that lap this stuff up, finally feeling that they are "right" for once in their lives. Of course they take it too far...

“Quantum Junctn: Use Both Lanes”

Since: Dec 06

Tulsa, Oklahoma USofA

#38 Mar 24, 2013
Jimmy wrote:
<quoted text>
Religion thrives on controlling young and ignorant minds. It is the ignorant and downtrodden that lap this stuff up, finally feeling that they are "right" for once in their lives. Of course they take it too far...
Indeed it does-- the more ignorant, the better.

Why do you suppose the first "lesson" in the BuyBull is one that states gaining knowledge is to be punished?
Siro

Ringwood East, Australia

#39 Mar 25, 2013
Reason Personified wrote:
<quoted text>
Speaking of target audiences, though they contain much of value, we atheist need no instruction, cheerleaders, nor messiahs in either becoming nor in staying atheist, and those books are lures for those among your ilk who are actually capable still of some independent thought processes, and for the rest of you, they are the forbidden titillation that makes you all squirrely, like you are now.
You say you need no messiahs and yet you can help but gush on about dawkins and his pap.
No one buys or seriously reads his books except for the chronically stupid.

Thanks for sharing
Thinking

Mirfield, UK

#40 Mar 25, 2013
Wrong.

The Selfish Gene and other serious textbooks were published years before many religitards had heard of Dawkins.
Siro wrote:
<quoted text>
You say you need no messiahs and yet you can help but gush on about dawkins and his pap.
No one buys or seriously reads his books except for the chronically stupid.
Thanks for sharing

“Citizen_Patriot_ Voter_Atheist!”

Since: May 09

Earth,TX

#41 Mar 25, 2013
Siro wrote:
<quoted text>
You say you need no messiahs and yet you can help but gush on about dawkins and his pap.
No one buys or seriously reads his books except for the chronically stupid.
Thanks for sharing
As usual, you have no idea of what I posted, and again, you respond to things that you imagine to be there. You claimed that "I gushed on", how about pointing out where that happened. Also as I said, the books are for you lot, you need them as you are (in your words) "chronically stupid", and need to repeatedly read the same pages, to even begin to get a clue.

BTW, I have never read one of his books, nor have I ever seen him, either on a show or even in a photograph. Do you know why? It's because I have no questions, about my decision to free myself from theism and the clergy's influence.
Now somebody does buy his books, and the atheist that I personally know, haven't even a clue as to who he is. I heard his name right here in this forum, some of his quotes have been posted in various threads. Those I have read.

Hawkings, though? I know who he is.

“Citizen_Patriot_ Voter_Atheist!”

Since: May 09

Earth,TX

#42 Mar 25, 2013
Jimmy wrote:
<quoted text>
Religion thrives on controlling young and ignorant minds. It is the ignorant and downtrodden that lap this stuff up, finally feeling that they are "right" for once in their lives. Of course they take it too far...
All it takes is one scripture that doesn't jive with what they have been taught, to create a seeker of knowledge. True the person does have to have at least a few still functioning brain cells, but the possibility exists in each group of god bots, and that is why any bit of light, even Dawkings words as T.P. could be the catalyst that frees one such as I once was.

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