The Perils of Fundamentalist Home Sch...

The Perils of Fundamentalist Home Schooling

Posted in the Atheism Forum

“Reason's Greetings!”

Since: Feb 11

Pale Blue Dot

#1 Dec 21, 2012
Looking Back at my Fundamentalist Home Schooling Past

http://reason-being.com/index.php/2012/12/20/...

"However, using homeschooling as a tool to isolate your children from the outside world is wrong. I’ll even go as far as to say it is emotional abuse. Fundamentalist groups deliberately use home schooling this way so that their children are rarely, if ever exposed to people they don’t agree with politically or religiously, or to people who they feel are “evil”(such as people in the LGBT community).

When someone like this is isolated to such an extent, the basic social skills that most of us learn at a very early age are not developed. I will not say that this was the only cause for the problems that I have now in relating to people, it’s more than likely something I was born with, but this isolation only made far worse.

Not only are social skills impaired, knowing how to deal with normal classroom life is affected, as well as things like changes that come by moving out of home. Libby Anne talks about coming to tears more times than she can remember in her attempts to adjust to living away from home after being in such an isolated environment. At least she had a solid group of people who helped her to work through the stress, in my case, it led to a nervous breakdown.

All of this, combined with a cultural disconnect from other people, led to a miserable time and downright debilitating depression. People who have never been through this don’t realize just how much everyday conversation and interactions are based on the culture around us. I love the way Libby Anne talks about this in a post on socialization:

I sometimes wonder if one reason so many home school parents cannot seem to understand the real meaning of the socialization question is that, having been socialized themselves, they cannot imagine what it would be like to not be.

They don’t understand what it feels like to be a foreigner in your own country. They don’t understand what it feels like to not be able to fit in. They don’t understand what it’s like to be robbed of the ability to be normal because they have the ability to be normal. Parents who home school may choose to be different, but their children have no such choice.

When I read this, I reflected on both my family, and all the families that I have encountered that home school, or send their kids to fundamentalist private schools, she’s right. All of them grew up in what could be considered normal families, attending public schools, usually with parents that were either non-Christian or were only casual followers of a religion. What’s even more ironic is that many of them were baby boomers who experienced the decadence of the 1970′s. They have no idea what this kind of isolation does to someone.

This isolation and this culture that is hostile to the outside world and everyone in it will cause two extremes in the people who were raised into it. Either people will be hesitant to leave, because it’s the only life and way of thinking that they know, a perpetual Stockholm syndrome, like my sister is experiencing, or it will drive people to leave it, like I did.

Most people of younger generations who were been raised into this system are fortunately going the same route I did. The hostility towards the outside world is one of the primary reasons why younger generations are leaving fundamentalism at a very fast pace, in a 2011 study by Christian polling group Barna researched most of the top reasons listed for young people leaving the churches had something to do with their broader rejection of the outside world, and isolation from it (which is the major aim of the fundamentalist home schooling movement). Whether that is their rejection of science, hostility towards outsiders, or hatred of homosexuality, this isolationism is starting to disgust the people raised into it.

I can only hope that this trend continues. "
KittenKoder

Auburn, Australia

#2 Dec 21, 2012
You hate home schooling because you and your marxist buddies dont have a chance to poison their minds thru ideology or their bodies thru your filthy sexual perversions.
Hope your next crack deal turns bad

“Reason's Greetings!”

Since: Feb 11

Pale Blue Dot

#3 Dec 21, 2012
KittenKoder wrote:
You hate home schooling because you and your marxist buddies dont have a chance to poison their minds thru ideology or their bodies thru your filthy sexual perversions.
Hope your next crack deal turns bad
Hate is a distinguishing feature of your theism. You are the example. This is characterized by your daily drive-by vitriol.
Amused

Gloucester, MA

#5 Dec 26, 2012
KittenKoder wrote:
You hate home schooling because you and your marxist buddies dont have a chance to poison their minds thru ideology or their bodies thru your filthy sexual perversions.
Hope your next crack deal turns bad
More children are subjected to "filthy sexual perversions" in churches and rectories than in public schools.
Largelanguage

Wrexham, UK

#6 Dec 30, 2012
MrDesoto1 wrote:
Looking Back at my Fundamentalist Home Schooling Past
http://reason-being.com/index.php/2012/12/20/...
"However, using homeschooling as a tool to isolate your children from the outside world is wrong. I’ll even go as far as to say it is emotional abuse. Fundamentalist groups deliberately use home schooling this way so that their children are rarely, if ever exposed to people they don’t agree with politically or religiously, or to people who they feel are “evil”(such as people in the LGBT community).
When someone like this is isolated to such an extent, the basic social skills that most of us learn at a very early age are not developed. I will not say that this was the only cause for the problems that I have now in relating to people, it’s more than likely something I was born with, but this isolation only made far worse.
Not only are social skills impaired, knowing how to deal with normal classroom life is affected, as well as things like changes that come by moving out of home. Libby Anne talks about coming to tears more times than she can remember in her attempts to adjust to living away from home after being in such an isolated environment. At least she had a solid group of people who helped her to work through the stress, in my case, it led to a nervous breakdown.
All of this, combined with a cultural disconnect from other people, led to a miserable time and downright debilitating depression. People who have never been through this don’t realize just how much everyday conversation and interactions are based on the culture around us. I love the way Libby Anne talks about this in a post on socialization:
I sometimes wonder if one reason so many home school parents cannot seem to understand the real meaning of the socialization question is that, having been socialized themselves, they cannot imagine what it would be like to not be.
They don’t understand what it feels like to be a foreigner in your own country. They don’t understand what it feels like to not be able to fit in. They don’t understand what it’s like to be robbed of the ability to be normal because they have the ability to be normal. Parents who home school may choose to be different, but
I can only hope that this trend continues. "
I myself am however against homeschooling. Although I would like to point out the visible emotional lack I see in you right now. Firstly you said your problem you have with socializing with people is innate, which comes from an emotionally immature perspective. Trust me, right now I am 59 and I have come to realise your past has more influence on you than you might actually think at first. You said secondly that people who have never been through it do not realise how damaging this is. Normally I would say you feel that way but adults know more than you might expect, since kids normally think that sort of thing, but considering your already an adult, it looks like you already have quite a deficit emotionally to not see this. Anyway, the fact that they do know what isolation is like actually makes it worse, much worse, and quite foolish.
Largelanguage

Wrexham, UK

#7 Dec 30, 2012
KittenKoder wrote:
You hate home schooling because you and your marxist buddies dont have a chance to poison their minds thru ideology or their bodies thru your filthy sexual perversions.
Hope your next crack deal turns bad
I bet you were taught to be ashamed of your sexuality. I'm placing quite a few bets on that.
Largelanguage

Wrexham, UK

#8 Dec 30, 2012
MrDesoto1 wrote:
Looking Back at my Fundamentalist Home Schooling Past
http://reason-being.com/index.php/2012/12/20/...
"However, using homeschooling as a tool to isolate your children from the outside world is wrong. I’ll even go as far as to say it is emotional abuse. Fundamentalist groups deliberately use home schooling this way so that their children are rarely, if ever exposed to people they don’t agree with politically or religiously, or to people who they feel are “evil”(such as people in the LGBT community).
When someone like this is isolated to such an extent, the basic social skills that most of us learn at a very early age are not developed. I will not say that this was the only cause for the problems that I have now in relating to people, it’s more than likely something I was born with, but this isolation only made far worse.
Not only are social skills impaired, knowing how to deal with normal classroom life is affected, as well as things like changes that come by moving out of home. Libby Anne talks about coming to tears more times than she can remember in her attempts to adjust to living away from home after being in such an isolated environment. At least she had a solid group of people who helped her to work through the stress, in my case, it led to a nervous breakdown.
All of this, combined with a cultural disconnect from other people, led to a miserable time and downright debilitating depression. People who have never been through this don’t realize just how much everyday conversation and interactions are based on the culture around us. I love the way Libby Anne talks about this in a post on socialization:
I sometimes wonder if one reason so many home school parents cannot seem to understand the real meaning of the socialization question is that, having been socialized themselves, they cannot imagine what it would be like to not be.
They don’t understand what it feels like to be a foreigner in your own country. They don’t understand what it feels like to not be able to fit in. They don’t understand what it’s like to be robbed of the ability to be normal because they have the ability to be normal. Parents who home school may choose to be different, but
I can only hope that this trend continues. "
I myself am however against homeschooling. Although I would like to point out the visible emotional lack I see in you right now. Firstly you said your problem you have with socializing with people is innate, which comes from an emotionally immature perspective. Trust me, right now I am 59 and I have come to realise your past has more influence on you than you might actually think at first. You said secondly that people who have never been through it do not realise how damaging this is. Normally I would say you feel that way but adults know more than you might expect, since kids
EdSed

Hamilton, UK

#9 Dec 30, 2012
What strikes me is that home-schooling in the USA seems to be associated with religion and fundamentalism. This doesn't seem true of the UK.

From what I have read, UK home-schooling has been very successful. Given the lack of discipline and poor motivation in many UK schools, I quite understand the inclination to consider home-schooling here.

The best time to learn a foreign language seems to be before the age of 7 or 8. This seems a point that schools aren't taking on-board. There are proposals in Scotland for all children (in state-funded schools) to start learning a foreign language at the age of 5 and a third one at the age of 10.
Largelanguage

Wrexham, UK

#10 Dec 30, 2012
EdSed wrote:
What strikes me is that home-schooling in the USA seems to be associated with religion and fundamentalism. This doesn't seem true of the UK.
From what I have read, UK home-schooling has been very successful. Given the lack of discipline and poor motivation in many UK schools, I quite understand the inclination to consider home-schooling here.
The best time to learn a foreign language seems to be before the age of 7 or 8. This seems a point that schools aren't taking on-board. There are proposals in Scotland for all children (in state-funded schools) to start learning a foreign language at the age of 5 and a third one at the age of 10.
No they aren't. Your statistics are false. You know nothing about the UK. It is usually the vulnerable soft kids who get picked on the most.

Since: Jun 07

Location hidden

#11 Dec 31, 2012
KittenKoder wrote:
You hate home schooling because you and your marxist buddies dont have a chance to poison their minds thru ideology or their bodies thru your filthy sexual perversions.
Hope your next crack deal turns bad
Its because you're a troll.
Largelanguage

Wrexham, UK

#12 Dec 31, 2012
-Skeptic- wrote:
<quoted text>
Its because you're a troll.
Its because she is a fool.
EdSed

Hamilton, UK

#13 Dec 31, 2012
Largelanguage wrote:
<quoted text>
No they aren't. Your statistics are false. You know nothing about the UK. It is usually the vulnerable soft kids who get picked on the most.
I know nothing about the UK?? Lol!

What statistics? What are you talking about? Admiuttedly I don't know much about the subject, but what evidence do you have that home-schooling in the UK is anything but a total success?

http://www.structuredhomelearning.com/...

http://www.homeschooling-ideas.com/how-to-sta...

I approach the subject with an open mind. The pit-falls are clear,(lack of opportunities for social integration and lack of shared resources), but so are the advantages,(one-on-one teaching ratio and a curriculum tailored to the child).

It seems to be of value to children with certain special needs sometimes, such as aspergers or learning difficulties.
Largelanguage

Wrexham, UK

#14 Dec 31, 2012
EdSed wrote:
<quoted text>I know nothing about the UK?? Lol!
What statistics? What are you talking about? Admiuttedly I don't know much about the subject, but what evidence do you have that home-schooling in the UK is anything but a total success?
http://www.structuredhomelearning.com/...
http://www.homeschooling-ideas.com/how-to-sta...
I approach the subject with an open mind. The pit-falls are clear,(lack of opportunities for social integration and lack of shared resources), but so are the advantages,(one-on-one teaching ratio and a curriculum tailored to the child).
It seems to be of value to children with certain special needs sometimes, such as aspergers or learning difficulties.
Yet again you prove you know nothing. You have to graduate your GCSE's legally from the goverment in order to go to college. In the UK homeschooling is not actually monitered, you only have to register. Yet again you prove you know nothing.

Since: Jun 07

Location hidden

#15 Jan 1, 2013
Largelanguage wrote:
<quoted text>
Its because she is a fool.
Sorry, that wasn't proof of god, you can f*ck off now.

Since: Jun 07

Location hidden

#16 Jan 1, 2013
Is what I meant to sake to the troll posing as Kittenkoder
Largelanguage

Wrexham, UK

#17 Jan 2, 2013
-Skeptic- wrote:
<quoted text>
Sorry, that wasn't proof of god, you can f*ck off now.
I don't even know what you're on about.
Largelanguage

Wrexham, UK

#18 Jan 2, 2013
-Skeptic- wrote:
Is what I meant to sake to the troll posing as Kittenkoder
OK.
MattFoley

Columbus, OH

#19 Mar 6, 2013
I was homeschooled by my Christian fundamentalist parents during grades K-8. Sometimes I wonder how my life would be different today if I had been sent to public school and raised in a more moderate setting.

I'm an alcoholic with kids by different moms, divorced, and living in a slum. Not saying that my troubles aren't of my own doing, but when I look around at the kids who I homeschooled with in our little community, none of them are exactly setting the world on fire. Most are divorced or have kids out of wedlock. Most have dealt with or are dealing with substance abuse issues. Most have rejected the faith altogether and are Atheists or "Functional Nihilists."

I'm not going to say that homeschooling is a horrible decision, especially in light of the rash of school shootings over the past few years.

But parents, if you go into it thinking you'll be able to shape and mold your kids into well-adjusted, high-functioning adults, just wait and see. The results might surprise you, and not in the way you hoped.

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