Who Is Allah?

Who Is Allah?

There are 256389 comments on the The Brussels Journal story from Aug 24, 2007, titled Who Is Allah?. In it, The Brussels Journal reports that:

“Allah is a very beautiful word for God. Shouldn't we all say that from now on we will name God Allah? [...] What does God care what we call him?”

From the desk of Soeren Kern on Fri, 2007-08-24 11:56 Europeans love to mock the salience of religion in American society. via The Brussels Journal

Join the discussion below, or Read more at The Brussels Journal.

Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152242 Oct 7, 2012
Tabari VI:110 "When Muhammad brought a revelation from Allah canceling what Satan had cast on the tongue of His Prophet, the Quraysh said,'Muhammad has repented of what he said concerning the position of our gods with Allah."

Holy screwup, Batman!
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152245 Oct 7, 2012
Qur'an 37:6 "We have decked the lower heaven with stars to protect them against all rebellious evil spirits, and provide security from every forward devil. So they cannot listen to the highest chiefs for they are pelted from every side, repulsed; they are under a perpetual torment, being driven off. Except such as they snatch away something by stealth, but then they are pursued by a flaming fire of piercing brightness."

Holy comic relief, Batman!
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152246 Oct 7, 2012
Bukhari:V6B60N332 "The Prophet said,'Last night a demon from the Jinn came to me to disturb my prayer, but Allah gave me the power to overcome him. I intended to tie him to one of the pillars of the mosque till the morning so that all of you could see him.'"

But the demon from the Jinn was just too slippery!
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152247 Oct 7, 2012
Bukhari:V9B93N650 "Some people asked the Prophet about soothsayers.'Allah's Apostle! Some of their talks come true.' The Prophet said,'That word which happens to be true is what a Jinn snatches away by stealth (from Heaven) and pours it in the ears of the soothsayer with a sound like the cackling of a hen. The soothsayer mixes it with one hundred lies.'"

Unholy hen cackles, Batman!
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152248 Oct 7, 2012
Qur'an 68:1 "I call to witness the Pen and what it writes. You are not a demented madman or possessed."

Write it 1000 times and it becomes TRUE!
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152249 Oct 7, 2012
Bukhari:V6B60N662 "Allah's Apostle said,'Some eloquent speech is as effective as magic.'"

Bukhari:V9B87N127 "The Prophet said,'I have been given the keys of eloquent speech.'"

Holy magic, Batman!
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152250 Oct 7, 2012
Bukhari:V6B60N658 "A man worked magic on Allah's Apostle until he started imagining that he had done a thing that he had not really done."

Damn! I was SURE that I'd turned off the oven before leaving for Khaybar!
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152251 Oct 7, 2012
Bukhari:V4B54N506 "When a human being is born, Satan touches him at both sides of the body with his two fingers. That is why it cries.'"

Satan only has two fingers! Who knew?

Wait a second...is that one finger per arm, or are the two fingers on one arm and the other arm is a stump?
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152253 Oct 7, 2012
Qur'an 89:1 "I swear by the dawn, and the ten nights, and the even and the odd, and the night when it departs."

Gollum: "We swears to do what you wants. We swears!"

Frodo: "There's no promise you can make that I can trust."

Gollum: "We swears to serve the Master of the Precious. We will swear on — on the Precious!(gollum gollum)"
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152254 Oct 7, 2012
Bukhari:V4B54N491 "Allah's Apostle said,'While you sleep, Satan ties three knots at the back of your head. He blows the following words at each knot,"The night is long so keep sleeping." If that person wakes up and praises Allah, then one knot is undone. When he performs ablution the second is undone. When he prays, all the knots are undone, and he gets up in the morning lively and gay, otherwise he is dull and gloomy.'"

Holy untied knots, Batman!
SeasideSoon

Hoschton, GA

#152255 Oct 7, 2012
Unemployment down? Really??

The Labor Department, based on a broad survey of employers, said 114,000 jobs were added in September.

But the unemployment rate itself is based on a separate "household survey," which showed a whopping 873,000 new jobs in September.

"This must be an anomaly," former Congressional Budget Office director Doug Holtz-Eakin said in a snap analysis of the numbers. "It is out of line with any of the other data.."

Holtz-Eakin noted the household survey is smaller, suggesting it is not as reliable. He called estimate of 873,000 new jobs "implausible."

"It is common to have large monthly changes in the employment numbers that are not consistent with other economic data. For example, employment reportedly rose by 649,000 in November of 2007, the month before the recession began," he said in a statement. "Still, this month's numbers almost certainly indicate that the unemployment rate is moving downward, even if the speed is considerably slower than the latest data indicate.""



Note 'household survey' means a random phone survey of a miniscule number of households, from from which the 873,000 jobs were extrapolated. The margin of error is 40-50%. Curious

Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152256 Oct 7, 2012
Bukhari:V1B11N582 "Allah's Apostle said,'When the Adhan [the call to prayer] is announced, Satan takes to his heels and passes wind with noise during his flight in order not to hear the Adhan.'"

Unholy noisy farts, Batman!
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152257 Oct 7, 2012
Bukhari:V7B71N643 "I heard the Prophet saying,'If anyone sees something he dislikes, he should blow three times on his left side and its evil will not harm him.'"

Bad, BAD black dog!!!
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152258 Oct 7, 2012
Qur'an 52:29 "Therefore remind: By the Grace of your Lord, you are no vulgar soothsayer, nor are you a possessed madman."

Does that make you a refined soothsayer and an unpossessed madman?

bmz

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#152259 Oct 7, 2012
Buford wrote:
<quoted text>bmz the gynecologist prophet,
Where did the zygote or the fetus of Jesus come from?
lol!

That came from his own mother. Why, Buford?
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152260 Oct 7, 2012
Tabari I:279 "It was a tree which made whoever ate from it defecate. But there must be no faeces in Paradise."

Holy shit, Batman!
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152261 Oct 7, 2012
bmz wrote:
lol!
That came from his own mother. Why, Buford?
Holy parthenogenesis, Batman!
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152263 Oct 7, 2012
Bukhari:V1B4N139 "I asked Allah's Apostle about a person who imagined they passed wind during prayer. He replied:'He should not leave his prayer unless he hears sound or smells something.'"

Holy imaginary farts, Batman!
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152264 Oct 7, 2012
Tabari I:267 "And Allah taught Adam all the names as follows: He taught him the name of everything, down to fart and little fart."

THESE THINGS MATTER!!!!
Buford

Scott Depot, WV

#152265 Oct 7, 2012
Bukhari:V1B4N137 "Allah's Apostle said,'The prayer of a person who does Hadath (passes urine, stool or wind) is not accepted till he performs ablution.'"

That is, unless he passes IMAGINARY urine, stool, or wind.

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