Haven't worked much, 29 years old, ho...

Haven't worked much, 29 years old, how to get a job?

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Needing some Advice

Richlands, VA

#1 Nov 7, 2009
I have not worked much over the years. A few short term jobs, sporadically. But for the most part, all I have done is babysitting and be a homemaker (no children). My fiance and I have been together 9.5 years, he has always worked, and didn't want me to work. I have3 decided I need a job, need my independance.

My question, how do I explain my lack of work to a prospective employer? Will this greatly hinder my getting a job? Has anyone else been through this?
Balto

Norwalk, CT

#2 Nov 7, 2009
Shacking up is not the way to go. He gets the nookie and you get the shaft with no place to land.

I am bad at giving advice to dummies.

Good luck any way.

“Slappy X. Sanchez, Esq.”

Since: Jun 08

Location hidden

#3 Nov 7, 2009
What are your skills? What exactly does a 'homemaker' with no children do?

I will need more information before dispensing any advice. Please, tell me everything. I'd really like to help.
Needing some Advice

Richlands, VA

#4 Nov 7, 2009
Well Balto, in that case, don't give yourself any advice. Moving on..

Slappy Sanchez, as a homemaker, I stayed home and took care of the cleaning, cooking, budgeting, paying bills, errands. I have did some babysitting over the years, to make some extra money, but the "Real jobs" have been very few. We only had one vehicle, and he didn't want me to work outside the home. Now, we have two vehicles, and I don't want to stay at home.

I have found several jobs to apply for, but when I went to fill out the applications, and prepare a resume, I began to realize that the huge gaps in employment are going to be difficult.:(

(Side note, not "shacking up and getting the shaft, blah blah - We got together when I was 19, he has wanted to marry me, and I do not want to make it official, get into starting a family and all that yet.)
CeeCee

Shirley, NY

#5 Nov 8, 2009
Needing some Advice wrote:
Well Balto, in that case, don't give yourself any advice. Moving on..
Slappy Sanchez, as a homemaker, I stayed home and took care of the cleaning, cooking, budgeting, paying bills, errands. I have did some babysitting over the years, to make some extra money, but the "Real jobs" have been very few. We only had one vehicle, and he didn't want me to work outside the home. Now, we have two vehicles, and I don't want to stay at home.
I have found several jobs to apply for, but when I went to fill out the applications, and prepare a resume, I began to realize that the huge gaps in employment are going to be difficult.:(
(Side note, not "shacking up and getting the shaft, blah blah - We got together when I was 19, he has wanted to marry me, and I do not want to make it official, get into starting a family and all that yet.)
Go to school.
If you are with the guy 9.5 years and living together and you still are unsure about marriage, move on! You met at 19, meaning you had NOT ENOUGH time to date other people. If you are not wildly dying to marry this man, he is not the man you are meant to marry.
Move on and go to school. There are no "careers" for you at this stage without an education.
You need to reinvent yourself. Comfort is not worth losing out on what could be an amazing life.. especially if he is the insecure type that needs you to be a "homemaker" (without kids?!?! INSANE!!)
liner

Bronx, NY

#6 Nov 8, 2009
You're probably going to get more advice about your living arrangements than your working skills around here.
At any rate, education is the key to pretty much everything. Otherwise, it's probably going to be Walmart or something.
Loser

Jackson, NJ

#7 Nov 8, 2009
Shake your money maker sweetheart. That's the only asset you got.
Maria

Brooklyn, NY

#8 Nov 8, 2009
How old is your fiance? My guesses are, that if you met him while you were 19, that he's at least 5 or 6 years older than you, he's a control freak, probably Italian, and therefore as insecure and as fat as they come.

Good luck. Now get the heck out of that relationship and start acting your own age and not like a 75 yr old granny.
plotmasteram

Union City, NJ

#9 Nov 8, 2009
Maria wrote:
How old is your fiance? My guesses are, that if you met him while you were 19, that he's at least 5 or 6 years older than you, he's a control freak, probably Italian, and therefore as insecure and as fat as they come.
Good luck. Now get the heck out of that relationship and start acting your own age and not like a 75 yr old granny.
My guess is that the only way you feel good about yourself and less secure,is at somebody else's expense.
Needing Advice

Richlands, VA

#10 Nov 8, 2009
Thank you CeeCee and Liner, actually I am planning to get back into school pretty soon. But, i'm looking for a job now and while I go to school.

Loser, your name could not possibly be any more accurate! lmao

Maria, we are actually the same age, he's only a few months older.. And he's white.. Insecure? Yes, i'll give ya that. lol

Plotmasteram, too many people are like how you described! lol I see it a lot on Topix.

Ok, thanks to all who posted.. The relationship/living arrangement aside, what I need to figure out, is there a way to explain the gaps of unemployment on a resume/application? Will this likely stand in my way of getting a job? I know that without my degree I will not be getting anything as far as a longterm career, but there are several decent paying jobs around that do not require a degree.

Thanks all!
Ponderous

New Brunswick, NJ

#11 Nov 8, 2009
Usually there are very affordable adult ed classes at your local school. Take a few computer classes (word, excel) so you can start building some marketable skills if you are thinking of an office job. In the meantime, waitressing, or working at a local fast food place can help you start to build an employment history to show that you can hold a job.
Vinny

Brooklyn, NY

#12 Nov 8, 2009
So you were 19 and sitting around an apartment all day "cleaning"? Get a life, chic.
Ponderous

New Brunswick, NJ

#13 Nov 8, 2009
Vinny wrote:
So you were 19 and sitting around an apartment all day "cleaning"? Get a life, chic.
She is...that's the point. My guess is she's in an extremely controlled, if not abusive relationship and has to take baby steps to get out of it safely.

“Slappy X. Sanchez, Esq.”

Since: Jun 08

Location hidden

#14 Nov 8, 2009
Needing some Advice wrote:
Well Balto, in that case, don't give yourself any advice. Moving on..
Slappy Sanchez, as a homemaker, I stayed home and took care of the cleaning, cooking, budgeting, paying bills, errands. I have did some babysitting over the years, to make some extra money, but the "Real jobs" have been very few. We only had one vehicle, and he didn't want me to work outside the home. Now, we have two vehicles, and I don't want to stay at home.
I have found several jobs to apply for, but when I went to fill out the applications, and prepare a resume, I began to realize that the huge gaps in employment are going to be difficult.:(
(Side note, not "shacking up and getting the shaft, blah blah - We got together when I was 19, he has wanted to marry me, and I do not want to make it official, get into starting a family and all that yet.)
Most people are able to do all of those household things while still being gainfully employed. While I give you credit for trying to fix your situation now, I have to wonder how you could have let yourself get into this situation in the first place.
Ben

Phoenix, AZ

#15 Nov 8, 2009
Balto wrote:
Shacking up is not the way to go. He gets the nookie and you get the shaft with no place to land.
I am bad at giving advice to dummies.
Good luck any way.
sounds like you are choking on the shaft, while the helmet is spitting allot down your throat, you dickstain loser.
Vinny

Brooklyn, NY

#16 Nov 14, 2009
Do you swallow?
Thomas

Phoenix, AZ

#17 Nov 14, 2009
Vinny wrote:
Do you swallow?
No you do until you choke.
Ron Jeremy

Amityville, NY

#18 Nov 16, 2009
I will give you a reference I just need your name or actually the name of your first pet and the street you grew up on.
end the hate

Brooklyn, NY

#19 Nov 17, 2009
Needing some Advice wrote:
I have not worked much over the years. A few short term jobs, sporadically. But for the most part, all I have done is babysitting and be a homemaker (no children). My fiance and I have been together 9.5 years, he has always worked, and didn't want me to work. I have3 decided I need a job, need my independance.
My question, how do I explain my lack of work to a prospective employer? Will this greatly hinder my getting a job? Has anyone else been through this?
Well you can try a job dealing with kids, since you have experience with babysitting, but i do really feel bad for you that you let your fiance control your life. While he was out working and meeting people, you were cooped up in the house, probably bored. It's time to get a part time job (if you need to settle for mcdonalds, then i guess you need to) and start going back to school, and make sure you tell your man who the boss around the house is!!

Since: Aug 09

Location hidden

#20 Nov 17, 2009
What skills do you have? What did you do prior to this gap in employment.

My advice would be to try to get a job with a temp agency. Sometimes once they see what you are capable of the gap would not matter as much.

Sometimes honesty is the best policy. Don't try to lie on an employment application since that could bite you back.

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