DeadBeat Dad in arrears for over fif...

DeadBeat Dad in arrears for over fifty five thousand dollars

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Elaine

Fort Lauderdale, FL

#1 Oct 27, 2007
I know I am not the only person playing this cat and mouse game, the states have to work together to catch these deadbeats.My ex husbands name is lewis sanchez he works for a company in LongIand called officefurniture.net that hides that fact. but please anyone out there if you see this man contact the police he is driving on a suspended license and there is also a warrant out for his arrest from the state of florida and hopefully new york will issue there own warrant soon. lewis sanchez also known as louie, louis,luis born 12/26/1964 he is 5/7 200 lbs bald he is hispanic but looks white may still have both ears pierced.this man is a dead beat and a con artist
Carol

Brooklyn, NY

#2 Oct 28, 2007
Elaine - get a job.
Carol

Brooklyn, NY

#3 Oct 29, 2007
"Topix" - I am very surprised that you have not removed this post. I would have assumed you would have your forums carefully monitored. You should not allow a person's private information to be revealed, i.e. name and date of birth over the internet.

I am very sympathetic to the ever-growing Father's Rights movement in our country, and I am very skeptical of the sincerity of this poster.

Child Support Enforcement is under investigation at this time due to their notorious and tremendous inaccuracies in arrearages over the years. Too many errors is a red flag of fraud.

Bottom line - there is too much personal and perhaps false and damaging info here on this individual. This is an inappropriate post.
Elaine

Fort Lauderdale, FL

#4 Oct 29, 2007
CAROL, WHATS WRONG ARE YOU LIVING WITH A DEADBEAT AND NOW HE HAS TO FINALLY SUPPORT THE CHILDREN HE BROUGHT INTO THIS WORLD, IS IT TAKING AWAY FROM YOU. WELL THE CHILDREN SHOULD ALWAYS COME FIRST. THERE ARE TO MANY PARENTS IN MY POSITION AND WE HAVE TO RESORT TO PUTTING UP POSTING BECAUSE THE AGENCIES WHO ARE SUPPOSED TO BE HELPING US ARE FAILING .ALSO I WORK TWO JOBS TO SUPPORT ME AND MY FAMILY BECAUSE IF I DIDNT I WOULD BE IN JAIL FOR CHILD NEGLECT.WHEN YOU GET DIVORCED THAT DOES NOT MEAN YOU STOP FEEDING YOUR CHILDREN.MY CASE IS PUBLIC RECORD THERE IS NOTHING FALSE OR INAPPRORIATE THESE ARE THE FACTS AND I WILL DO WHAT EVER IT TAKES TO GET THERE FATHER TO HELP ME SUPPORT THEM.
Elaine

Fort Lauderdale, FL

#5 Oct 29, 2007
I ALSO WANTED TO ADD, SOMETHING MUST ALSO BE DONE ABOUT THESE COMPANYS WHO PAY PEOPLE OFF THE BOOKS.THEY NEED TO SEND OUT MORE INVESTIGATORS WHEN THEY ARE TOLD OF PLACE OF EMPLOYMENT.THESE COMPANYS THAT ARE CAUGHT SHOULD BE FINED.SEE IF I WAS ONE OF THOSE PARENTS WHO SAT HOME ALL DAY AND COLLECTED WELFARE I AM SURE THE STATE SUPPORT UNIT WOULD DO THERE JOBS AND FIND THESES DEADBEATS.WHEN THE STATE HAS TO SUPPORT THESES KIND OF FAMILYS THEN THEY DO THERE JOBS.

AND THIS IS FOR YOU CAROL ITS NOT ALWAYS A MAN WHO IS A DEADBEAT SO YOU CAN BE AS SYMPATHETIC AS YOU WANT ITS ABOUT THE RESPONSIBILTY OF BEING A PARENT.AND WHEN A COURT HAS TO ORDER A PERSON TO SUPPORT THERE OWN CHILDREN ITS A SAD THING .AND TO KEEP AVOIDING YOUR OBLIGATION IS A CRIME.
Carol

Brooklyn, NY

#6 Oct 30, 2007
Elaine – First of all, I am sorry for your plight. You are in a very difficult situation with, I assume, young children. If your ex owes you what you say he owes you, then he probably has not paid you anything for a long period of time.

Child Support Enforcement throughout our country has been overcharging non-custodial parents by “mistakenly” doubling up support and arrearage. They also have not been paying custodial parents in spite of the fact that custodial parents have paid. The incompetence of this particular agency is so egregious, that it gives the appearance of fraud.

“Deadbeat Dad” posters make the assumption that the debtor is in arrears based on this agency’s erroneous figures. The postings are also bias as they never post custodial parents who do not use their support money for their children, who repeatedly deny visitation rights to the non-custodial parent, and who claim child abuse when no abuse ever existed in order to gain custody or control of the finances.

For these reasons, I am strongly opposed to any public posting regarding personal family issues. They are also harmful to the child/children involved for obvious reason. If your husband were to make certain claims about you publicly – whether they are correct or not – is hurtful to your children.

The problems in family court are too numerous to delve into here, but these problems are compounded by our legal system’s refusal to grant joint custody to parents (except in cases of abuse) as well as to make mandatory mediation as opposed to our current system of litigation. This serves the legal system only and has developed into an industry and has little to do with our families.

I wish you and your family well, and I hope your issue with your ex will be resolved. I am sure his absence in his children’s lives is a great void for many reasons.
Mans denied to see kids

Grand Rapids, MI

#7 Oct 31, 2007
id like to share my situation, My X couldnt recieve child suppor much longer my step daughter would have turned 7 and no more aid comng but boy she saw me coming, SHE omiited me on the birth certificate put the kids names in her mothers including the first borns first and last name, and started collecteing afdc again then after not letting me see the first after a few months she brings her over to see grandmas, I havent seen her for awhile and love her and my new daugter convince her to love me and yes my 2nd, then she doesnt let me see them anymore i go to court change the names find out i owe money 43,000 they drop it down to 8,000 and i get rights to see the kids wow how fast does 8,000 go up expecially when you have to find any job you can and there not monitoring you or telling you you should learn to play accountant then we get married why be a family with kids seeing eacchother only half the time, then i have to support her shes still not working support a family and pay back at this time 33.ooo dollar it keeps going up she sees the problem and takes the easy way out get mom to buy a house for her, then the oldest kids dont bother coming to see you, and after 2 yrs of weekends with the little ones there mom tells them dont bother going to his house just as long as i have you ready your ok and ive done my job, Im only half a parent and then even less than that the kids smoke oldest pregnant two kids no husband more and more atrocities have happened at there house to much to horrrible to mention and now when instead of the state they resiede witch we moved to gets childsupport another state we used to live in overrides primary support kids dont see support for a yr i get papers from her not to see the kids at my house change of circumstances and pay all the money back its a horrible mess and im going now on to appeals court. I realy hate hearing the mothers always saying there the victim of the sysem and they have kids dads that are dead beats, SO strange when if theyed work stop divorcing or having kids withoout commitment stop looking for the greener pasteurs and milking everydime and quarter they could get from others maybe wed have more working class citizins kids would know themselves better from two parents be more disciplined and less crazy, AND fathers would stop commiting suiside int the jails having there liscences taken away not able to go out of the country and having felonie records where they cant get work. believe me there are good woman and good men and there are bad woman and bad men!! I JUST HATE THE STEREO TYPE DEAD BEAT DADS SURE THERE DEAD BEAT DADS THERE BEATEN TO DEATH BY THE WOMAN AND SYSTEM OF WELFARE AND CHILD SUPPORT AND THERE DEAD BEAT ALLRIGHT HOLDING DOWN TWO THREE JOBS AND GOING TO COURT AND NEVER SEEING THE KIDS. LETS FIGHT CASE BY CASE THE GOOD THE BAD AND THE UGLY AND FIX THE MESS THATS ALL!!
Carol

Brooklyn, NY

#8 Nov 1, 2007
Thank you for sharing your story. I know you are one of many men abused by the system and/or a greedy ex.

There are also men with 2nd families that are living in shelters to support the 1st family.

Good luck to you.
Elaine

Fort Lauderdale, FL

#9 Nov 1, 2007
too bad for the parents who make more children if they cant even support the ones they have now. boo hoo!!wake up people there are good people and bad and the ones who keep bringing life into this world have to sacrafice for them.I have supported my children working two jobs for years.I never went on welfare and yes i am fighting for my child support. yes there are deadbeat parents out in the world this is not a perfect world and those parents should be held accountable.and yes it is about the children my son had to put off college this year because we simply didnt have enough money for the tuition and books. he also has begged his dad for help and his crys fell on deaf ears.so please i have no pitty for parents like him . male or female. if you bring that child into the world then you take care of them end of story. its not the greedy ex its the selfish parent who dont want to help!!!!!
Carol

New York, NY

#10 Nov 1, 2007
I meant to say greedy and vengeful ex-wife.

You say your husband owes you $50,000. If he is a working class or middle class person - you wake up Elaine - he's probably not going to able to pay you that much money in this lifetime.

If instead he is making big bucks, then that money is coming your way - sooner or later - and I hope its as soon as possible for you and your son. Most of the time though, men that are given the label "deadbeat" are NOT financially well off. They have either been laid off a good paying job, and cannot get a "downward modification", as it is called, or they have fallen behind in making payments and arrearage built up. Some men also make the mistake of signing off on an amount that they cannot possibly pay. They are encouraged to do so by the court (which should NEVER be allowed) and also some feel too much guilt about the family breaking up. Their monthly support payments are therefore above the state percentage of what they should be paying.

I didn't say that you should not fight for child support - by posting his personal info in a public forum is not fighting for child support - it's being vengeful. You say it's all about the children - but your original post is more about you Elaine.

You say that your son had to put off college - why? He would have been entitled to financial aid since you are in dire straits financially. There are also scholarships and grants. And there are grants for single moms too - so, either you have not explored these avenues or you are just tyring to get sympathy. If your son "begged his father for help" - then you know where he is since your son spoke to him I assume by phone.

I have pity for both parents actually - but I have no patience with people who do not have compassion. He was once your lover, and he is you son's father. Give him reason to come back into your lives other than to just support you.

Of course people should be responsible for their families - you say you have worked hard - and I believe you. Perhaps he's worked hard too - but, like a lot of other working class people, he doesn't get anywhere.

I sincerely hope he comes back in your lives and helps the two of you financially. He might want very much to be with your son again. Child Support Enforcement though will only treat him as a criminal and an endentured slave. He is a father that is behind in his payments. He is in BIG trouble. He most likely will NOT come forward on his own because of it.
Elaine

Fort Lauderdale, FL

#11 Nov 1, 2007
To many bleeding heart liberals out there thats why this country is going to hell!! And i will continue to do what i have to EVEN if it means putting up more posting.I will not go back and fourth on this issue with you i know what i have to do and in my case the law is on my side and one day justice will be served and yes in some cases when you are ordered to support your own children and you run away or you work off the books and you hide your assets then yes you are a criminal.
Carol

New York, NY

#12 Nov 2, 2007
He's working off the books - as what - a neurosurgeon - how much money can most people make off the books.

Yes, the law is on your side Elaine - the law, was designed originally to keep divorced women with kids off welfare. The law today serves the legal community mostly.

A father is more than someone who shells out money. My memories of my own father have more to do with the things we did together and conversations we had than the times he paid the gas bill.

Did you encourage a relationship between your son and his father? Did they play ball together when he was growing up?... or did you deny him visitation? Children need both parents for many reasons.

If you suddenly lost your job, and couldn't come up with the rent money - you would have to move, but no one would put you in jail for not having the money. No one will call you a "deadbeat mom".

Your ex, if he doesn't have the money, is going to jail. How is that going to get you money?

Yes, the law is on your side Elaine.
Mari

Long Beach, CA

#13 Nov 14, 2007
I often think about how many more advantages my children would have had from having a proper father who pays child support and at least remember about their birthdays. My ex owes my children more than $30,000 and he has never been interested in them. Anyway, If he would, he would not have been a good example being a drug addict, a violent man etc.. how many times have you heard about stories like mine?. I have the full custody of my children but my frustration with NY Family Court has no end. We had many court dates and only once they put in handcuff and he was finally forced to pay a small amount. Many more times they did not take action having TWO warrants for his arrest. My oldest son is 6 years old and he does not even know about his existence. He is a very talented musician and needs to keep taking piano lessons but with mortgages and bills I cannot afford them. I was a victim of domestic violence and I gave my children everything they needed as far as housing, food, schools, and now a great dad!!! But what they really need is for this NY Family Court to WAKE UP and finally stop being so forgiving with this kind of biological donors. Shame on them for the lack of action!!!
stacie

AOL

#14 Nov 26, 2007
Carol you are just plain ignorant and you obviously have a deadbeat father living in your home. I don't know a single female with children that will not be upset about not receiving child support. Yes he may not make enough, Yes he may have other debt, and yes blah blah blah. Don't forget, we are the women that are taking care of the children in the first place. Yes WE may not make enough, Yes WE may have other debt, but that is not stopping us from taking care of our children. Your opinion Carol is rediculous. Can't wait until you get pregnant by that deadbeat you are with, you'll be singing another tune sweetie. Grow up!!!!!!!!
stacie

AOL

#15 Nov 26, 2007
Don't even respond to her any further, she is probably a deadbeat father herself. Get off of this post you cross dresser.
Carol

Brooklyn, NY

#16 Nov 26, 2007
I see I’ve missed quite a bit here since last I looked. I thought the forum was dead. Glad you both brought it back to life.

No, I am not married to someone who owes child support. The man I am married to did pay child support – and too much of it. Since he was self-employed, the ASSUMPTION was that he was hiding his money. His ex remarried shortly after his divorce, and denied him visitation. She wanted to live happily ever after with her new husband and the kids and forget that their father existed. But that is history thankfully.

I had no problem with his ex receiving child support nor do I have a problem with any custodial parent receiving support. If you read what I wrote, my problem is with the legal system that controls all divorced families today. The fact that you said that you are owed a certain amount of money in arrearage does NOT make it a fact, because of the realities of a system notorious to those involved for egregious errors in accounting and corruption.

I stand by original opinion - that because of the above,“deadbeat dad” postings should be discouraged and outlawed.
Carol

Brooklyn, NY

#17 Nov 26, 2007
The fact that Elaine's original post has gotten rehashed, and due to its too personal nature, I will not respond to any more posts in this forum - I will though welcome another forum regarding problems relative to family courts and custodial/non-custodial parent issues. So, if you would like to challenge my opinions on this issue, I welcome it - but, please create another forum - and without names and birth dates, etc.
downwithdeadbeat s

Bonney Lake, WA

#19 Dec 7, 2007
If you don't pay the payments, do you blame the bank for taking away your house or your car? If you don't pay your electric bill, is it the electric company's fault when your power is shut off? Do you call them and whine about how since they have more money than you do, you shouldn't have to pay your power bill?
It's not about the money...it's about a parent, ANY parent, moms AND dads, taking responsibility for the welfare of their kids. Yes, there are custodial parents out there who abuse the system...that's why there is a dispute process and men (or women) who feel they are being treated unfairly should use it. Go make your case. Keep records. If you don't want to pay or think you shouldn't have to pay...too damn bad. If you truly CAN'T pay, then go prove it. you don't even have to go to court or get a lawyer! You just have to convince administrative law judge at an informal hearing!
But don't hide like a weasel, ruin your own life by living in the shadows. Think about the future...if not the future of your kids, then at least think about your own future and how that hole you're digging just keeps getting deeper and deeper and one day, you're not going to be able to get out. Pay your support. It's the right thing to do.
Stacie

AOL

#20 Dec 12, 2007
That was very well put downwithdeadbeats!!!!!:)
donetryingimtire d

Shoreham, NY

#21 Dec 19, 2007
downwithdeadbeats wrote:
If you don't pay the payments, do you blame the bank for taking away your house or your car? If you don't pay your electric bill, is it the electric company's fault when your power is shut off? Do you call them and whine about how since they have more money than you do, you shouldn't have to pay your power bill?
It's not about the money...it's about a parent, ANY parent, moms AND dads, taking responsibility for the welfare of their kids. Yes, there are custodial parents out there who abuse the system...that's why there is a dispute process and men (or women) who feel they are being treated unfairly should use it. Go make your case. Keep records. If you don't want to pay or think you shouldn't have to pay...too damn bad. If you truly CAN'T pay, then go prove it. you don't even have to go to court or get a lawyer! You just have to convince administrative law judge at an informal hearing!
But don't hide like a weasel, ruin your own life by living in the shadows. Think about the future...if not the future of your kids, then at least think about your own future and how that hole you're digging just keeps getting deeper and deeper and one day, you're not going to be able to get out. Pay your support. It's the right thing to do.
i am tired of going back and forth to court and nothing gets done. and when he does show up and asks for his free legal aide comes up with some excuse of why he can't pay .why doesn't he just say i'm a drug addict and want to pretend like my children never existed because i'm too addicted to crack to care. my ex owes over 50,000 hasn't seen his kids in 4 years and lives 2 towns away . he had a great job and quit it so he would not have to pay , now has a job making what he needs to get his drugs and that is all he cares about , not my three childrens birthdays christmas or later on in life college, marriage and seeing them have children. he is missing out on the most beautiful children ( all boys) they will grow up to be fine young men never abuse their wives or take food from their childrens mouths ...that is what a real man does. and for you carol -the arrears get built up because they are losers and think they could get away from it but they keep digging themselves deeper and deeper and for the comment about posting personal info ...the people should know who these losers are so they don't get involved with them - so in case anyone is seeing my ex stephen sontag dob 2/6/69 run...run as fast as you can.. he will beat you, steal from you and then leave you --that is all i have to say -

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