“Incorrupta fides, nudaque veri”

Level 9

Since: May 07

Vincit qui se vincit

#13528 Oct 24, 2013
Maverick 808 wrote:
This looks like a good spot.
*hang up a poster of June*
The beavers mom?

“Incorrupta fides, nudaque veri”

Level 9

Since: May 07

Vincit qui se vincit

#13529 Oct 24, 2013
GANNY wrote:
<quoted text>
Sweety its October..
lol

Morning Ganny

“Incorrupta fides, nudaque veri”

Level 9

Since: May 07

Vincit qui se vincit

#13530 Oct 24, 2013
Sir Moos a Lot wrote:
The daymn neighborhood has gone to the pasture .
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOS .
Hey Dad what's been happening with you?

“Incorrupta fides, nudaque veri”

Level 9

Since: May 07

Vincit qui se vincit

#13531 Oct 24, 2013
lol this is one I never thought I'd hear!

http://www.myfoxdfw.com/story/23639078/man-wi...

“Insert useless statement here.”

Level 5

Since: Feb 08

Location hidden

#13532 Oct 24, 2013
Ricky F wrote:
lol this is one I never thought I'd hear!
http://www.myfoxdfw.com/story/23639078/man-wi...
Every village has an idiot. lol

“<3”

Level 9

Since: Jun 10

Black Rock City, NV

#13533 Oct 24, 2013
LOL. Good morning.

“Colorful Beyond Words”

Level 10

Since: May 11

"Always On The Go "

#13534 Oct 24, 2013
Good Morning all.

Hope each of you have a great day .

“....VETS”

Level 9

Since: Jan 08

WELCOME HOME

#13535 Oct 24, 2013
Chris - PSL wrote:
<quoted text>Every village has an idiot. lol
would Twin Peaks or the sister cities still have just one??????????

“Incorrupta fides, nudaque veri”

Level 9

Since: May 07

Vincit qui se vincit

#13536 Oct 24, 2013
lol

Since: Jul 09

Location hidden

#13537 Oct 24, 2013
Ricky F wrote:
lol this is one I never thought I'd hear!
http://www.myfoxdfw.com/story/23639078/man-wi...
Toasterphilia.

Level 9

Since: Sep 11

KENTUCKY

#13538 Oct 24, 2013
Ricky F wrote:
<quoted text>lol
Morning Ganny
Evening Ricky

Level 9

Since: Sep 11

KENTUCKY

#13539 Oct 24, 2013
Naturally Wired wrote:
<quoted text>
Toasterphilia.
LOl..

“Incorrupta fides, nudaque veri”

Level 9

Since: May 07

Vincit qui se vincit

#13540 Oct 25, 2013
Naturally Wired wrote:
<quoted text>
Toasterphilia.
Next time you go to make toast you shouldn't have to worry if Johnny's was manhandling the toaster! lol

“Incorrupta fides, nudaque veri”

Level 9

Since: May 07

Vincit qui se vincit

#13541 Oct 25, 2013
GANNY wrote:
<quoted text>
Evening Ricky
What kind of trouble are you into today? lol

“<3”

Level 9

Since: Jun 10

Black Rock City, NV

#13542 Oct 25, 2013
Ricky F wrote:
lol this is one I never thought I'd hear!
http://www.myfoxdfw.com/story/23639078/man-wi...
Toasters aren't soft and nevermind...

“ON TRAIL W / DONKEY!”

Level 5

Since: Oct 08

I HAVE BAD JOCK ITCH!

#13543 Oct 25, 2013
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

*He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.

*He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.

*He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.

*He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.

*He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS.

*He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK - He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.

*He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.

*He is not a SEX MACHINE - He is ROMANTICALLY AUTOMATED.

*He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY.

*He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED.

*He does not UNDRESS YOU WITH HIS EYES - He has an INTROSPECTIVE PORNOGRAPHIC MOMENT.

“ON TRAIL W / DONKEY!”

Level 5

Since: Oct 08

I HAVE BAD JOCK ITCH!

#13544 Oct 25, 2013
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

*She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED AMERICAN.

*She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.

*She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.

*She does not TEASE or FLIRT - She engages in ARTIFICIAL STIMULATION.

*She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.

*She has not BEEN AROUND - She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.

*She does not GET YOU EXCITED - She causes TEMPORARY BLOOD DISPLACEMENT.

*She is not KINKY - She is a CREATIVE CAREGIVER.

*She does not have a KILLER BODY - She is TERMINALLY ATTRACTIVE.

*She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.

*She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.

*She is not HORNY - She is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.

*She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.

*She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.

*She is not a SLUT - She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.

*She does not have MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS - She is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.

*She is not a TWO BIT WHORE - She is a LOW COST PROVIDER.

“ON TRAIL W / DONKEY!”

Level 5

Since: Oct 08

I HAVE BAD JOCK ITCH!

#13545 Oct 25, 2013
FBI TOP DEATHS OF THE YEAR

Every year the FBI, is asked to investigate over 36,000 Serious Crimes including Suspicious Deaths and Homicides. Every year the Homicide Investigations Unit puts out its Top Homicides of the year.

Debby Mills-Newbroughton, 99 years old, was killed as she crossed the road. She was to turn 100 the next day, but crossing the road with her daughter to go to her own birthday party her wheel chair was hit by the truck delivering her birthday cake.

Peter Stone, 42 years old, is murdered by his 8 year old daughter, who he had just sent to her room with no dinner. Young Samantha Stone felt that if she couldn't have dinner no one should, and she promptly inserted 72 rat poison tablets into her fathers coffee as he prepared dinner. The victim took one sip and promptly collapsed. Samantha Stone was given a suspended sentence as the judge felt she didn't realize what she was doing, until she tried to poison her mother using the same
method one month later.

David Danil, 17 years old, was killed by his girl friend after he attempted to have his way with her. His unwelcome advance was met with a double-barreled shotgun. Charla's (the girlfriends') father had given it to her an hour before the date started, just in case.

Javier Halos, 27 years old, was killed by his landlord for failing to pay his rent for 8 years. The landlord, Kirk Weston, clubbed the victim to death with a toilet seat after he realized just how long it had been since Mr Halos paid his rent.

Megan Fry, 44 years old, is killed by 14 state troopers after she wandered onto a live firing, fake town, simulation. Seeing all the troopers walking slowly down the street Megan Fry had jumped out in front of them and yelled Boo!. The troopers, thinking she was a pop up target, fired 67 shots between them, over 40 of them hitting the target. She just looked like a very real looking target, one of the troopers stated in his report.

Julia Smeeth, 20 years old, was killed by her brother Michael because she talked on the phone too long, Michael clubbed his sister to death with a cordless phone, then stabbed her several times with the broken arial.

Helena Simms, Wife to the famous American nuclear scientist Harold Simms was killed by her husband after she had an affair with the neighbor. Over a period of 3 months Harold substituted Helena's eye shadow with a Uranium composite that was highly radioactive, until she died of radiation poisoning. Although she suffered many symptoms, including total hair loss, skin welts, blindness, extreme nausea and even had an ear lobe drop off, the victim never attended a doctor's surgery or hospital for a check up.

Military Sergeant John Joe Winter killed his two timing wife by loading her car with rintynitrate explosive (similar to C4). The Ford Taurus she was driving was filled with 750 kgs of explosive, forming a force twice as powerful as the Oklahoma Bombing. The explosion was heard by several persons some up to 14 kilometers away. No trace of the car or the victim were ever found, only a 55 meter deep crater, and 500m of missing road.

Patty Winter, 35 years old, was killed by her neighbor in the early hours of a Sunday morning. Her neighbor, Falt Hame, for years had a mounted F4 phantom jet engine in his rear yard. He would fire the jet engine, aimed at an empty block at the back of his property. Patty Winter would constantly complain to the local sheriff's officers about the noise and the potential risk of fire. Mr Hame was served with a notice to remove the engine immediately. Not liking this he invited Miss Winter over for a cup of coffee and a chat about the whole situation. What Winter didn't know was that he had changed the position of the engine, as she walked into the yard he activated it, hitting her with a blast of 5,000 degrees, killing her instantly, and forever burning her outline into the driveway.

“ON TRAIL W / DONKEY!”

Level 5

Since: Oct 08

I HAVE BAD JOCK ITCH!

#13546 Oct 25, 2013
Conrad Middleton, 26 years old, was killed by his twin brother Brian after a disagreement over who should take the family home after their parents' passed away. Conrad had a nasal problem, and had no sense of smell. After the argument Brian stormed out of the house, then snuck back later, and turned on the 3 gas taps in the house, filling it with gas. He then left out a box of cigars, a lighter and a note saying, "Sorry for the spree, have a puff on me, Brian". Conrad promptly lit a cigar, destroying the house, and himself in the process.....

“ON TRAIL W / DONKEY!”

Level 5

Since: Oct 08

I HAVE BAD JOCK ITCH!

#13547 Oct 25, 2013
A man had just finished reading "Man Of The House" while making his commute home from work. When he reached home, he stormed into the house and walked directly up to his wife, pointing his finger in her face, he said "From now on I want you to know that I am the man of this house and my word is law!

You are to prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished eating my meal, I expect a sumptuous dessert afterward. Then, after dinner, you're going to draw my bath so I can relax. And when I'm finished with my bath, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?"

His wife replied, "My guess would be the Funeral Director."

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