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21 - 40 of 56 Comments Last updated Dec 18, 2013

“He said What?!”

Level 5

Since: Feb 10

No Way! LOL

#27 Nov 26, 2013
Fisherman 808 wrote:
<quoted text>
Hi Shirley,
I've written in here a few times about sociopaths. Even started a thread once, I think. A lady at work told me about 'The Sociopath Next Door' by Martha Stout-
http://www.amazon.com/Sociopath-Next-Door-Mar...
That book has changed my life. Up to one in twenty five people are sociopaths- according to Martha. Lots of different "experts" have lots of different opinions on the definition and characteristics of sociopaths. I think Dr Phil is an idiot (and probably a sociopath). Sociopaths can span the range from retarded to genius. The stupid ones (male mostly) end up in prison. A lot of the really smart ones are rich businesspersons. Like Bernie Madoff and Donald Trump and Mitt Romney. I believe my mom was one. I also believe it's more that 50% hereditary. One thing I think, that Martha didn't talk about much, is that there are degrees. I definitely feel guilt and remorse and empathy. But, as much as I like animals, I find it usually easy to go hunting and fishing and kill and eat them!
I think ME is one. Depends on your definition and degree. She is also very smart. It could be possible for very smart people to think things through logically and do the right thing, like being nice to her nieces and nephews. It might not be from an inner moral compass. Religion can help people too. Sociopaths need external controls. A belief in Heaven and Hell could help one behave. Money, fame and social acceptance (what my mom had, a desire for social acceptance) can mold behavior. Many women have that strong desire for social acceptance. I also think motherly instincts can be a strong motivator and guide behaviors.
How did that book help me? My daughter says I'm nicer and have a calmer demeanor now. It makes it so I can accept people better, when I know they have no guilt, remorse or empathy, I can tell myself,'it's not their fault', they can't help it. I get taken advantage of less and can stand up for myself better.
Why just Sunday morning, in a Box store parking lot, a guy came up with a gas can and asked for two dollars to buy gas. It was real easy to say,'no'- and I didn't feel guilty! lol
Thank you Fisherman.
:-)
I am grateful for your post's and find them insightful.
I want to re-read it/them in the morrow, to better understand and form a reply.
(Tired eyes tonight, Tuesday has been a long day)

Good night Topix.

“He said What?!”

Level 5

Since: Feb 10

No Way! LOL

#28 Nov 26, 2013
60s chic wrote:
I'm sure that I'm not a sociopath. I don't deliberately or willfully hurt people and if by any chance I would ever accidentally hurt someone's feelings in some way that I'm not aware of, I will go out of my way to make up for it and/or apologize. It's true that most sociopaths are not murderers or even dangerous and thank God for that. Sociopaths just happen to be people who don't feel empathy or compassion the way their opposites do. These days, it makes me wonder what exactly is normal anymore. I'm only speculating, but it could be that the behavior of sociopaths goes back to our earliest primitive roots and may have been necessary for survival. We're all human and not perfect. People are always hurting each other for some reason or other, and many go on to later regret their mistakes. Not all sociopaths are always completely devoid of sympathy or compassion either, but a true sociopath generally is capable of feeling compassion and sympathy only for his or herself. He/she could care less about anyone else or the rest of the world for that matter. I have read that there have been many people in politics and other public area who have been or are sociopaths. Just look at the way our world is going. Greed, power, war, violence, lack of concern or care for what is crucial and/or vital to the earth and it's inhabitants and evil corporations more concerned about becoming even richer then they are, without any concern for the rest of the world. All these behaviors have wrecked havoc on civilization throughout history and society as a whole and it's still continuing. Let's hope we have a balance of what is also good in this world because that may help mankind and save him in the future.
Been remiss and almost forgot to say, Thank you for this excellent post, 60's chick.
It is very thought provoking.
Good night.
:-)

“People will think I'm crazy”

Since: Jan 07

Rome, Italy

#29 Nov 27, 2013
That stone just keeps on rolling
Bringing me some real bad news
The takers get the honey
The givers sing the blues

Since: Feb 09

Location hidden

#30 Nov 27, 2013
I didn't watch the clip the first time I made a comment here. now that I have, my impression is that the girl is an attention seeker, that this is her 15 seconds of fame, and she got exactly what she wanted by going on Dr Phils show.
those type people are annoying - but other than that id say shes probably harmless. kinda makes u feel sorry for people like that.
kinda..

“you're not the boss of me!”

Since: Jan 08

the road less traveled.....

#31 Nov 27, 2013
"According to one study, an estimated 75 percent of prisoners—according to one study—met criteria for antisocial personality disorder..."

http://psychnews.psychiatryonline.org/newsart...

Some years back I trained to facilitate a program at work, MRT,(Moral Reconation Therapy) that was aimed at addressing the sociopathic tendencies of many inmates. In the training, we had to go through the steps also and I found it be powerful...but when working with the inmates, it was obvious in most cases they were just 'performing' and really did not have the ability to be honest even with themselves.

Good discussion, I find this kind of stuff interesting

“you're not the boss of me!”

Since: Jan 08

the road less traveled.....

#32 Nov 27, 2013
Fisherman 808 wrote:
<quoted text>
Hi Shirley,
I've written in here a few times about sociopaths. Even started a thread once, I think. A lady at work told me about 'The Sociopath Next Door' by Martha Stout-
http://www.amazon.com/Sociopath-Next-Door-Mar...
That book has changed my life. Up to one in twenty five people are sociopaths- according to Martha. Lots of different "experts" have lots of different opinions on the definition and characteristics of sociopaths. I think Dr Phil is an idiot (and probably a sociopath). Sociopaths can span the range from retarded to genius. The stupid ones (male mostly) end up in prison. A lot of the really smart ones are rich businesspersons. Like Bernie Madoff and Donald Trump and Mitt Romney. I believe my mom was one. I also believe it's more that 50% hereditary. One thing I think, that Martha didn't talk about much, is that there are degrees. I definitely feel guilt and remorse and empathy. But, as much as I like animals, I find it usually easy to go hunting and fishing and kill and eat them!
I think ME is one. Depends on your definition and degree. She is also very smart. It could be possible for very smart people to think things through logically and do the right thing, like being nice to her nieces and nephews. It might not be from an inner moral compass. Religion can help people too. Sociopaths need external controls. A belief in Heaven and Hell could help one behave. Money, fame and social acceptance (what my mom had, a desire for social acceptance) can mold behavior. Many women have that strong desire for social acceptance. I also think motherly instincts can be a strong motivator and guide behaviors.
How did that book help me? My daughter says I'm nicer and have a calmer demeanor now. It makes it so I can accept people better, when I know they have no guilt, remorse or empathy, I can tell myself,'it's not their fault', they can't help it. I get taken advantage of less and can stand up for myself better.
Why just Sunday morning, in a Box store parking lot, a guy came up with a gas can and asked for two dollars to buy gas. It was real easy to say,'no'- and I didn't feel guilty! lol
ha! I knew we had this discussion before...I checked this book out of the library after talking with you about it!

“Standin' In A”

Level 8

Since: May 11

Shaft Of Light

#33 Nov 27, 2013
PFfff wrote:
I didn't watch the clip the first time I made a comment here. now that I have, my impression is that the girl is an attention seeker, that this is her 15 seconds of fame, and she got exactly what she wanted by going on Dr Phils show.
those type people are annoying - but other than that id say shes probably harmless. kinda makes u feel sorry for people like that.
kinda..
I have mixed feelings for them. As I grew up, I was always a little jealous of people that could do what ever they want. When I was 5, my 4 year old next door neighbor and I tried pulling each other around with a real long rope in a wagon (my wagon, it was nicer than his- lol). He got running as fast as he could and cut the corner and rammed the wagon into the curb. I flew out and skinned up my elbows and knees and of course, cried like a baby. He showed no guilt remorse or empathy, I could tell he did it on purpose. He ended up moving to the State Capital city and went to the best High School. Was the star quarterback, I'm sure had all the prettiest girls. I heard he ended up a State Police Trouper.
By Dr P's definition (and most mental health care professionals) to meet the criteria for a 'condition' and label (like in the DSM-IV, or is V or VI out now?), a person has to have something that negatively affects a major life function. Many sociopaths (my definition- have no, or very little, guilt, remorse or empathy)do not meet the criteria for a diagnosis, that is probably what Dr P was thinking.
So, I don't feel sorry for all of them. It can actually be a good thing in some cases.
Oh, that is why the 50/50 heredity vs environment, with their definition.
With no inner moral compass, sociopaths need external motivation to be good.(external=environment)
People can be good to gain a desire or to avoid something (external reasons).
[desire/avoid]- Money/poor (living on the street), Power/Helpless, Fame/Solitude, Sex/No Sex, Social Acceptance/Outcast, Heaven/Hell, Freedom/Jail and fear of the law, Physical Pleasure/Pain or mental anguish (alcohol and drug addicts), Adrenaline Rush/Total Boredom (risk takers), Other/Other,,,.
I hope I don't sound like I'm talking down at you? lol
It's your fault, you got me started again.
I think about this topic almost every day! lol
razz58

Flossmoor, IL

#34 Nov 27, 2013
Big Time wrote:
That stone just keeps on rolling
Bringing me some real bad news
The takers get the honey
The givers sing the blues
If that is'nt the Truth.

razz58

Flossmoor, IL

#35 Nov 27, 2013
Psychopaths and sociopaths are psychologically-wounded and unable to empathize or bond with other people or feel any sense of right or wrong. The opposite of this is to be over-empathic and obsessed with "justice" and helping other people - while neglecting and abusing yourself.

So, by being opposite....I'm left with no name.

“Standin' In A”

Level 8

Since: May 11

Shaft Of Light

#36 Nov 27, 2013
Debra27 wrote:
<quoted text>
ha! I knew we had this discussion before...I checked this book out of the library after talking with you about it!
Hi Deb.
We have something in common.
In my job, I work with a higher percentage of them too. After 30 years, I'm getting burnt out on it.
The book helped a lot though. Now I understand what I'm dealing with. When they act like a jackazz, I can smile to myself, not take it personally, and handle it in a calm professional manner. lol Instead of having my heart start pounding, turn all red and say things I regret later! That book might actually help me avoid a heart attack!
I would think it would help you too.
All police should have a good understanding of sociopaths too.
razz58

Flossmoor, IL

#37 Nov 27, 2013
bell wrote:
<quoted text>
My experience made me a little hard if you will towards life & others. It is VERY difficult for me to trust ANYONE after what I've been through... But what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger/ wiser.
Live & learn ... Forgive but NEVER forget... Especially when dealing with a sociopath.
Forgive but NEVER forget
I can only forget.....time heels most wounds.
With time comes forgiveness ....I guess
( I'm too busy watching Karma kick azz ) lol
Some things are easy to 'say'.
'I forgive you' is one.......
but
How many times has this been 'said' but not meant?
razz58

Flossmoor, IL

#41 Nov 27, 2013
ShirleyUjest wrote:
Watch this clip from The Dr. Phil Show :
http://youtu.be/IhmrhW6cwiE...
Do you think M.E.(lady in the clip) is a sociopath?
Why or why not?
Do you think you may be a sociopath?
Have a sociopaths tendencies?
Why?
Or why not
In this thread it is perfectly ok to not use your known avatar. Use what ever name you want if it will allow you to be truthful.
This thread is not for slamming, trolling or abusing another poster or to judge them.
If you do not wish to discuss your personal psyche, or the clip
then I ask that you respectfully ignore this thread and the people posting here.
Intrigued? Then lets begin...
I do not think M.E. is a sociopath.
I think she has a narcissistic personality disorder.
To some extent, I can relate to a few of her (rather common) fantasies.
But for the most part I found her vapid, delusional and weakly manipulative.
What do you think?
Ah... but they have their weaknesses.....
What would possess her to show her ugly mug and reveal how fcuked up she 'really' is...... on National TV.lol
She seems to make a point of it's more common than people think.
So that makes it ok attitude.
No conscience....sad

I was extremely disappointed.... and only took it as a warning to others.

'I can relate to a few of her (rather common) fantasies'.

What might they be?

“Standin' In A”

Level 8

Since: May 11

Shaft Of Light

#42 Nov 27, 2013
razz58 wrote:
<quoted text>
Forgive but NEVER forget
I can only forget.....time heels most wounds.
With time comes forgiveness ....I guess
( I'm too busy watching Karma kick azz ) lol
Some things are easy to 'say'.
'I forgive you' is one.......
but
How many times has this been 'said' but not meant?
Sociopaths count on others forgetting, most people do.
Most normal people don't want to believe that somebody could be such an azz, so they block out and forget.

“Proud White Woman for life!”

Level 8

Since: Apr 09

Spotted World

#43 Nov 27, 2013
60s chic wrote:
Ha, could be that Dr. Phil is a sociopath. Just kidding, but you never know, lol. After having so many guests on his show and all the money that he's raking in, he often looks like he has a blank stare on his face - just another work day for a big celebrity. Anyway, his armchair psychology seems rather logical and predictable, imo. He must even be asking himself sometimes, "Where do these people come from?" Still, they are people with problems just like anyone may be experiencing across America. For him, the more the merrier. His show will probably thrive until he's too old to do it anymore.
As for his style, it is a lot like that of Judge Judy, or even Jerry Springer for that matter, though some probably get a lot more out of a single session with Jerry.

Since: Feb 09

Location hidden

#44 Nov 27, 2013
Fisherman 808 wrote:
<quoted text>
I have mixed feelings for them. As I grew up, I was always a little jealous of people that could do what ever they want. When I was 5, my 4 year old next door neighbor and I tried pulling each other around with a real long rope in a wagon (my wagon, it was nicer than his- lol). He got running as fast as he could and cut the corner and rammed the wagon into the curb. I flew out and skinned up my elbows and knees and of course, cried like a baby. He showed no guilt remorse or empathy, I could tell he did it on purpose. He ended up moving to the State Capital city and went to the best High School. Was the star quarterback, I'm sure had all the prettiest girls. I heard he ended up a State Police Trouper.
By Dr P's definition (and most mental health care professionals) to meet the criteria for a 'condition' and label (like in the DSM-IV, or is V or VI out now?), a person has to have something that negatively affects a major life function. Many sociopaths (my definition- have no, or very little, guilt, remorse or empathy)do not meet the criteria for a diagnosis, that is probably what Dr P was thinking.
So, I don't feel sorry for all of them. It can actually be a good thing in some cases.
Oh, that is why the 50/50 heredity vs environment, with their definition.
With no inner moral compass, sociopaths need external motivation to be good.(external=environment)
People can be good to gain a desire or to avoid something (external reasons).
[desire/avoid]- Money/poor (living on the street), Power/Helpless, Fame/Solitude, Sex/No Sex, Social Acceptance/Outcast, Heaven/Hell, Freedom/Jail and fear of the law, Physical Pleasure/Pain or mental anguish (alcohol and drug addicts), Adrenaline Rush/Total Boredom (risk takers), Other/Other,,,.
I hope I don't sound like I'm talking down at you? lol
It's your fault, you got me started again.
I think about this topic almost every day! lol
no ur not talking down to me.
I always look up to the heavens when im confused. lol
lol
ya lost me awhile back... lol
but its ok.

:}

“Standin' In A”

Level 8

Since: May 11

Shaft Of Light

#45 Nov 27, 2013
PFfff wrote:
<quoted text>
no ur not talking down to me.
I always look up to the heavens when im confused. lol
lol
ya lost me awhile back... lol
but its ok.
:}
lol
That made perfect sense to me when I wrote it.
Looks a little hard to understand a couple of hours later!
What I've been working on lately is getting as many ideas across in the least number of words.
You have to admit, that had a lot of thoughts and not too many words. Right?

“People will think I'm crazy”

Since: Jan 07

Rome, Italy

#46 Nov 27, 2013
Ha, could be that Dr. Phil is a sociopath, You mean he can Start Fires with his mind,...??

Since: Feb 09

Location hidden

#47 Nov 28, 2013
Fisherman 808 wrote:
<quoted text>
lol
That made perfect sense to me when I wrote it.
Looks a little hard to understand a couple of hours later!
What I've been working on lately is getting as many ideas across in the least number of words.
You have to admit, that had a lot of thoughts and not too many words. Right?
Fisherman, if That was the least number of words. i'd hate to see what the Most amount would be. LOL

just teasing u!!

actually it was a good post, well thought out.
pay no attention to me, im a wiseguy (gal) lol

Happy Thanksgiving!!
:)

“Standin' In A”

Level 8

Since: May 11

Shaft Of Light

#48 Nov 28, 2013
PFfff wrote:
<quoted text>
Fisherman, if That was the least number of words. i'd hate to see what the Most amount would be. LOL
just teasing u!!
actually it was a good post, well thought out.
pay no attention to me, im a wiseguy (gal) lol
Happy Thanksgiving!!
:)
lol
A book wouldn't fit here!

Happy Thanksgiving to you too.

“My Bad! Just hold me. ”

Level 9

Since: Aug 07

Orion's Belt

#49 Nov 28, 2013
Indeed! To perfection.

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