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Level 8

Since: Jan 11

Location hidden

#147 Mar 7, 2013
I took too much Viagra and I can't get through the turnstile. Also, after 4 hours of erection, I need to go to the doctor and have him jab a needle into my peni_s to drain the blood out.

Since: Feb 09

Location hidden

#148 Mar 7, 2013
i called out dead once,

my boss said - sure ok, see u tomorrow.

lol

Level 8

Since: Jan 11

Location hidden

#149 Mar 7, 2013
Low Battery, beep, beep, bee...
Beau Vine

Medford, NY

#150 Mar 7, 2013
"Hello Boss...... I'm not coming to work today, someone left a dead horse carcass on my front stoop and I feel like climbing into it naked with my girlfriend......I'll try to make it in tomorrow"

“I know where you are,”

Level 8

Since: Jun 08

Right here under my thumb

#151 Mar 7, 2013
Overheard in an Indiana cornfield:

"Ummmm...yeah, dis' da' bozz? Ummm, yeah, mah goat's mama kicked me las' night an I can't do no work."

“The O.C.C”

Since: Mar 13

Location hidden

#152 Mar 7, 2013
http://youtu.be/fsI_TTLoPR8
<warning; graphic injury>

Level 8

Since: Jan 11

Location hidden

#153 Mar 8, 2013
americanchopper wrote:
http://youtu.be/fsI_TTLoPR8
<warning; graphic injury>
Put a bandaid on it, Sissy! OMG, I think he got at least 2 days off.

“This is how I see you”

Level 8

Since: Jun 11

Location hidden

#154 Mar 8, 2013
Today, I called in on strike! If my boss isn't going to work, neither am I!(but I'll still get payed)

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