Since: Jan 07

Location Shown

#1 Jan 8, 2014
DEAR ABBY: When my daughter was 20, she met a guy who one minute showered her with roses and the next would beat her up.

Does a Shallow Grave still work if 5 to 1 Ratio of lime to body Weight still work , provided the Teeth and hands are removed. Thanks for any tips on getting access to a bank account as long as the Torso hasn't been Identified,...

“Have mercy”

Level 3

Since: May 13

On a liar's soul

#2 Jan 8, 2014
Deer Abby,
Thanks for the advice on handling a cheating husband.
Just goes to show, never let a scorned woman cook your food. The sound of retching was ever so sweet.

“Standin' In A”

Level 8

Since: May 11

Shaft Of Light

#3 Jan 8, 2014
Deer Abby,
What if a guy, like, say, DILF, drank way too much beer for three days and thought he needed to let off some gas, but got way more than he bargained for?
What should he do?
Abby Auntlers

Denton, TX

#4 Jan 8, 2014
Big Time wrote:
DEAR ABBY: When my daughter was 20, she met a guy who one minute showered her with roses and the next would beat her up.
Does a Shallow Grave still work if 5 to 1 Ratio of lime to body Weight still work , provided the Teeth and hands are removed. Thanks for any tips on getting access to a bank account as long as the Torso hasn't been Identified,...
Dear BT,
Cadaver dogs can find remains covered with lime.
Not a good thing.
I advise you to find a friendly local hog farmer,
or rendering plant.
Make a donation.
Say...$100.00 for the folks in charge to
go have a nice dinner on.
Offer to stay behind and watch the
animals for an evening.
Be sure to strip the body of any thing
that might present a choking
hazard or not be digestible.
As for the bank accounts, sorry , no can help.
__________
Bad Bex wrote:
Deer Abby,
Thanks for the advice on handling a cheating husband.
Just goes to show, never let a scorned woman cook your food. The sound of retching was ever so sweet.
Dear BB,
Glad it worked out for you.
Do remember, don't get eager and add too
much "spice" to the soup.
Let it simmer over several months while you get
the deeds and life insurance paid up in your name.
__________
Fisherman 808 wrote:
Deer Abby,
What if a guy, like, say, DILF, drank way too much beer for three days and thought he needed to let off some gas, but got way more than he bargained for?
What should he do?
Dear F808,
If it was warm weather,
I would advise hosing off in the back yard.
With temp's so dangerously low now,
it sounds like your friend is sool.
Hope he wasn't s.h.itting on your couch at the time.

“Have mercy”

Level 3

Since: May 13

On a liar's soul

#5 Jan 8, 2014
LOL!

Since: Jan 07

Location Shown

#6 Jan 8, 2014
My friends and I skipped school and we filled up a cup of pee and tried to get our neighbors dog to drink it.

But he wouldn't

“ROCK ON ROCKERS!!”

Level 8

Since: Mar 11

Rockin' USA ;)

#7 Jan 8, 2014
Dear Abby...Am in LOVE w/a Sea Captain..BUT am a Landlubber..

DO WE HAVE A CHANCE OF BEING IN A HAPPY RELATIONSHIP???

HURRY..with your ANSWER..He has Shore Leave Coming Up!!!

Level 5

Since: Mar 13

Location hidden

#8 Jan 8, 2014
Deer Abby,

Should we have the right to throw that venison right on bed of truck (after accidantly striking down on highway) since the deerducktable on our insurance should well pay for that and let those state workers enjoy the rest of their lunch breaks instead of takin' that road kill call?
Abby Auntlers

Denton, TX

#9 Jan 8, 2014
Colorado Chick wrote:
Dear Abby...Am in LOVE w/a Sea Captain..BUT am a Landlubber..
DO WE HAVE A CHANCE OF BEING IN A HAPPY RELATIONSHIP???
HURRY..with your ANSWER..He has Shore Leave Coming Up!!!
Dear CC,
If he loves you too, it will work out.
Buy some sexy outfits he can relate to
and finds exciting.
Something unique like a strapless
beer barrel with holes drilled in the sides.
Stock up on lots of rum and Dramamine.
Remember most of all
http://youtu.be/QNontwT5PzA...
;}
Abby Auntlers

Denton, TX

#10 Jan 8, 2014
AIias - Trish wrote:
Deer Abby,
Should we have the right to throw that venison right on bed of truck (after accidantly striking down on highway) since the deerducktable on our insurance should well pay for that and let those state workers enjoy the rest of their lunch breaks instead of takin' that road kill call?
Deer A - T,
Whether you should or do are two different questions.
It may be in your favor to contact
an attorney to answer them.
Would seem a shame to waste fresh
fenderized venison, I say.
Happy grill-ing.
:)

Level 5

Since: Mar 13

Location hidden

#11 Jan 8, 2014
Abby Auntlers wrote:
<quoted text>
Deer A - T,
Whether you should or do are two different questions.
It may be in your favor to contact
an attorney to answer them.
Would seem a shame to waste fresh
fenderized venison, I say.
Happy grill-ing.
:)
**snicker

A lawyer ... haha

I orphaned 'bambi' look alike last year.
The next driver took that one out. It took me days to smell
the big momma, but I went and cleaned up the very little one next day.
I'd rather of eaten them. Sorry, but true.

“He said What?!”

Level 5

Since: Feb 10

No Way! LOL

#12 Jan 8, 2014
Deer Abby,
You were right in the column published 02/22/11. There is undeniable proof that dropping acid during pregnancy has long term ill effects on the fetus' mental health and social development.
Camilla

Chula Vista, CA

#13 Jan 8, 2014
Abby Auntlers wrote:
<quoted text>
Dear CC,
If he loves you too, it will work out.
Buy some sexy outfits he can relate to
and finds exciting.
Something unique like a strapless
beer barrel with holes drilled in the sides.
Stock up on lots of rum and Dramamine.
Remember most of all
http://youtu.be/QNontwT5PzA...
;}
abby auntlers;
- Dramamine

steady on the barrel; port stern starboard bow

Since: Jan 07

Location Shown

#14 Jan 10, 2014
Abby Auntlers wrote:
<quoted text>
Dear BT,
Cadaver dogs can find remains covered with lime.
Not a good thing.
I advise you to find a friendly local hog farmer,
or rendering plant.
Make a donation.
Say...$100.00 for the folks in charge to
go have a nice dinner on.
Offer to stay behind and watch the
animals for an evening.
Be sure to strip the body of any thing
that might present a choking
hazard or not be digestible.
As for the bank accounts, sorry , no can help.
__________


Thanks Abby,
a Whole mess of HooG ribs do sound good about Now, Don't Worry i traded those cards for a Pint of MD20/20, So short of some Cornbread we are set,...

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