Comments
3,181 - 3,200 of 3,400 Comments Last updated Tuesday

“Mid Summer Days”

Level 8

Since: Dec 06

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3217
Sep 18, 2013
 
Spotted Girl wrote:
Every hear about the drag queen with combat experience?
He was a decorated man.
When two egotists meet

you can be sure it'll be

'an I for an I'

:)

“We're all Bozos on this bus”

Since: Jan 07

Indianapolis, IN

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3218
Sep 18, 2013
 
I was shocked at the estimate for repairing my plaster walls. When I asked the contractor for an explanation of the cost he only said 'Lathe, clown, lathe."

“Fluffy arctic foxes”

Level 8

Since: Oct 08

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3219
Sep 18, 2013
 

Judged:

1

1

1

I try to fit into super tight jeans, but I can't pull it off.
beatlesinthebog

New Zealand

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3220
Sep 18, 2013
 

Judged:

1

NotaGoth wrote:
I try to fit into super tight jeans, but I can't pull it off.
Had a similar problem...was in the changing room moaning and bitching when to my surprise the manager screamed out "Will ya just f***ing zip it!!"

“Fluffy arctic foxes”

Level 8

Since: Oct 08

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3221
Sep 18, 2013
 

Judged:

2

1

1

beatlesinthebog wrote:
<quoted text>Had a similar problem...was in the changing room moaning and bitching when to my surprise the manager screamed out "Will ya just f***ing zip it!!"
Sew you didn't want to hurt a fly? I guess it's in your jeans, then.

:)

“Mid Summer Days”

Level 8

Since: Dec 06

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3222
Sep 19, 2013
 

Judged:

1

1

The local barber is very popular,
there is always a long queue,
but I go there early, and
that gives me a head start!

“Proud White Woman for life!”

Level 8

Since: Apr 09

Spotted World

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3223
Sep 19, 2013
 

Judged:

1

I got me some food color to add to what I eat so I can shed a few pounds. They say you can lose weight if you dye it.

“Proud White Woman for life!”

Level 8

Since: Apr 09

Spotted World

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3224
Sep 19, 2013
 

Judged:

1

1

Hear about the controversy at the orchestra? Some guy switched from playing an alto saxophone to a baritone saxophone in the middle of a song. Imagine that, having a sax change in the middle of a song!

But then I didn't go. I find that symphonies are too full of sax and violins for my taste.

“Proud White Woman for life!”

Level 8

Since: Apr 09

Spotted World

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3225
Sep 19, 2013
 

Judged:

1

Here is one that I just found in the chat of an online game that I thought was cute:

"Dear Math, I'm tired Of finding your x, accept the Fact that she's gone! Move on Dude."

Yes, Algebra does tend to have bad luck in the romantic department, since there are so many x's and n's to find.

Level 8

Since: Dec 10

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3226
Sep 19, 2013
 
An African-American lady named Betty went into a restaurant and asked "Is there any chicken on the menu?"

And the waitress replied "Nooo black Betty, it's ham or lamb."

“Fluffy arctic foxes”

Level 8

Since: Oct 08

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3227
Sep 19, 2013
 
After a huge war ensued in the science ward, I guess it's history now.

“Proud White Woman for life!”

Level 8

Since: Apr 09

Spotted World

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3228
Sep 19, 2013
 

Judged:

1

1

1

Would a stabbing in a sewer in front of witnesses be an open and sh*t case?

Level 8

Since: Dec 10

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3229
Sep 20, 2013
 

Judged:

1

1

Frogs wear open toad sandals.

“Mid Summer Days”

Level 8

Since: Dec 06

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3230
Sep 20, 2013
 

Judged:

1

'What did Robin say to Batman..
when he nearly got hit at the archery contest?

>>

"That was an arrow escape!"

“Fluffy arctic foxes”

Level 8

Since: Oct 08

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3231
Sep 22, 2013
 

Judged:

1

1

1

I never thought Tom stole things from his job as the road worker, but when I got home, all the signs were there.

Level 8

Since: Dec 10

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3232
Sep 22, 2013
 

Judged:

2

2

1

A calendar is for the week minded.

“Fluffy arctic foxes”

Level 8

Since: Oct 08

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3233
Sep 24, 2013
 

Judged:

2

1

1

Waiters are good at multiplication because they know their tables.

“We're all Bozos on this bus”

Since: Jan 07

Indianapolis, IN

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3234
Sep 25, 2013
 

Judged:

1

1

The mob's hit men are good at subtraction.

Level 8

Since: Dec 10

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3235
Sep 25, 2013
 

Judged:

1

1

1

The grocery store has a sale on this week: 2pac's of Eminem's for 50 Cent.

That's Ludacris!

“Fluffy arctic foxes”

Level 8

Since: Oct 08

Location hidden

|
Report Abuse
|
Judge it!
|
#3236
Sep 25, 2013
 

Judged:

1

1

1

The magician got so pissed off that he pulled his hare out of his hat....

Tell me when this thread is updated: (Registration is not required)

Add to my Tracker Send me an email

Type in your comments below
Name
(appears on your post)
Comments
Characters left: 4000
Type the numbers you see in the image on the right:

Please note by clicking on "Post Comment" you acknowledge that you have read the Terms of Service and the comment you are posting is in compliance with such terms. Be polite. Inappropriate posts may be removed by the moderator. Send us your feedback.

•••
•••