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“Proud White Woman for life!”

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Spotted World

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#2949
Jan 30, 2013
 

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Asphalt is not another name for hemorrhoids.

“We're all Bozos on this bus”

Since: Jan 07

Indianapolis, IN

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#2950
Jan 30, 2013
 

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We guarantee our service with a simile: You'll be happy as a pig in mud with the results.

“My dog Ali.”

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#2951
Jan 30, 2013
 

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I never cared much for MATH
but recently I see decimals have a point too.

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#2952
Jan 31, 2013
 

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Our gay neighbor thinks that whenever I mention him, I make jokes about his sexual lifestyle but that isn't true. He's always taking things the wrong way.

“Proud White Woman for life!”

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#2953
Jan 31, 2013
 

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Making jokes about the physically challenged is so lame...

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#2954
Feb 1, 2013
 

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My wife is on a diet and eats nothing but fruit. The house is FULL of that stuff. It's enough to make a mango crazy.

“I call it as I see it.”

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Retirement City

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#2955
Feb 4, 2013
 

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How about the man who created a successful cat food company? I heard he started from scratch.

“I call it as I see it.”

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#2956
Feb 4, 2013
 

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The owner of a 1968 Mercury Cougar boasts about how it's engine still purrs like a kitten.

“We're all Bozos on this bus”

Since: Jan 07

Indianapolis, IN

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#2957
Feb 6, 2013
 

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It's illegal to treat an ill eagle without a license

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#2958
Feb 6, 2013
 
I wasn't sure if I could make a joke about a flower but I think I rose to the challenge.

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#2959
Feb 7, 2013
 

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Some people go to the rest rooms to sit and think. I go there to sh-t and stink.

“Proud White Woman for life!”

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#2960
Feb 7, 2013
 

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Those who write upon these walls,
do their s*** in little balls.
Those who come to read and sit,
eat those little balls of s***.

“Proud White Woman for life!”

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#2961
Feb 7, 2013
 
Sorry, wrong thread. At least the iconer didn't string me along.

“My dog Ali.”

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#2962
Feb 7, 2013
 

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The astronaut who broke
the law of gravity
got a suspended sentence.

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#2963
Feb 7, 2013
 
I've read there is talk about putting a clock on the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Sounds like a good idea to me. What good is the inclination if you haven't got the time?

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#2964
Feb 7, 2013
 

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If you find a mouse in your drink, does it mean that someone slipped you a mickey?

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#2965
Feb 7, 2013
 
"Free tampon sample - no strings attached."

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#2966
Feb 7, 2013
 

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A good art teacher knows how to draw out your inner potential.

“We're all Bozos on this bus”

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Indianapolis, IN

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#2967
Feb 7, 2013
 

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Napoleon and Marie Antoinette were a bonapart in the rib section.

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#2968
Feb 8, 2013
 

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'Tis better to love a short person than to never have loved a tall.

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