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“Proud White Woman for life!”

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Spotted World

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#5504
Nov 1, 2013
 
Why is America attaching religion and free speech in the courts in the name of free speech?

“Right click Left click Yay!”

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Since: Dec 10

Nehwon

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#5505
Nov 1, 2013
 
Spotted Girl wrote:
Why is America attaching religion and free speech in the courts in the name of free speech?
Some people forget why the Freedom of Religion was included in the First Amendment.

At the time, different flavors of Christianity were scared the other flavors of Christianity would be the national religion.

The same reason they ran away from Europe...

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#5506
Nov 2, 2013
 

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Sometimes I'll go to the hardware store and run around with a screwdriver, shouting "Ladies and gentlemen, this is not a drill!"

“We're all Bozos on this bus”

Since: Jan 07

Indianapolis, IN

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#5507
Nov 2, 2013
 

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If you cross a pen!s and a potato, do you get a dicktater?

“We're all Bozos on this bus”

Since: Jan 07

Indianapolis, IN

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#5508
Nov 2, 2013
 

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Hoof Arted wrote:
Sometimes I'll go to the hardware store and run around with a screwdriver, shouting "Ladies and gentlemen, this is not a drill!"
At Walmart, you can buy a monkey wrench AND bananas at the same time.

“Proud White Woman for life!”

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Spotted World

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#5509
Nov 2, 2013
 
Uh Clem wrote:
<quoted text>
At Walmart, you can buy a monkey wrench AND bananas at the same time.
But hopefully not from the same aisle.

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#5510
Nov 3, 2013
 

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"Hmmmm," I thought, when my buddy asked me what "ham" would sound like without a vowel.

“Built like a ”

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North Korean missile!.

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#5511
Nov 3, 2013
 

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Why do "Otter-Pops" contain 0% otter?

That's false advertising.

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Since: Feb 12

Danielson, CT

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#5512
Nov 3, 2013
 

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If a Jewish friend sprinkles your conversations with Yiddishisms would it be fair to consider him an oyster?...

“Proud White Woman for life!”

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Spotted World

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#5513
Nov 3, 2013
 

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I Am Enzo - The Baker wrote:
If a Jewish friend sprinkles your conversations with Yiddishisms would it be fair to consider him an oyster?...
Oy vey!

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#5514
Nov 4, 2013
 

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"I'm going to f*ck you over!" can mean two completely different things, depending on whether you're talking face to face or on a walkie-talkie.

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#5515
Nov 4, 2013
 

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Hoof Arted wrote:
"I'm going to f*ck you over!" can mean two completely different things, depending on whether you're talking face to face or on a walkie-talkie.
OMG!!! ROFLMAO

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#5516
Nov 5, 2013
 

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I started up a business selling drawing boards, but it didn't work out.

So I started selling drawing boards again.

(Think about it.)

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Bronx, NY

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#5517
Nov 5, 2013
 

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What do cannibals think of other cannibals who like talking about their inner child?

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#5518
Nov 5, 2013
 
That the other cannibal must have a wife and 8 kids.

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Bronx, NY

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#5519
Nov 5, 2013
 
Hoof Arted wrote:
That the other cannibal must have a wife and 8 kids.
How long does it take for the cannibal to pass one of them in the jungle?...

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#5520
Nov 5, 2013
 

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I Am Enzo - The Baker wrote:
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How long does it take for the cannibal to pass one of them in the jungle?...
I don't know, but I hope he remembers to put them in the 'fridge. There's nothing worse than a bunch of spoiled kids.

“We're all Bozos on this bus”

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Indianapolis, IN

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#5521
Nov 5, 2013
 
Hoof Arted wrote:
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I don't know, but I hope he remembers to put them in the 'fridge. There's nothing worse than a bunch of spoiled kids.
The new mother was admonishing her husband about spoiling their child. Upon changing his first poopy diaper, dad said he wished she'd brought that subject up sooner because it's already happened.

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Bronx, NY

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#5522
Nov 5, 2013
 
Hoof Arted wrote:
<quoted text>
I don't know, but I hope he remembers to put them in the 'fridge. There's nothing worse than a bunch of spoiled kids.
...especially when you're fed up with their parents...

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#5523
Nov 5, 2013
 
Maybe he'd bitten off more than he could chew...

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