Funny Quotes
First Prev
of 3
Next Last

Level 8

Since: Dec 08

Fairfield, OH

#1 Sep 22, 2013
Anybody got one they want to share?

Level 9

Since: Feb 12

Location hidden

#2 Sep 22, 2013
Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue.
David Brent

Level 8

Since: Dec 08

Fairfield, OH

#4 Sep 22, 2013
White Fire wrote:
A man's ego is like his penis the more you stroke it the bigger it gets.
Sorry Topix i could not help my self ;)

Level 8

Since: Oct 08

Location hidden

#5 Sep 23, 2013
"We're all a little weird, and life is a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutual weirdness and call it love.”
-Robert Fulghum

Level 8

Since: Dec 08

Fairfield, OH

#6 Sep 23, 2013
Santa Claus has the right idea: visit people once a year

Level 8

Since: Dec 08

Fairfield, OH

#7 Sep 23, 2013
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

Level 9

Since: Feb 12

Location hidden

#8 Sep 23, 2013
A flat Tire will occur when you are without a spare.
Corollary:
This will happen after your significant other has reminded you to get one.
Enzo's Axiom:
She will be in the car.

“..i can't STAND her....and”

Since: Jun 08

...i don't want him..WTF?.....

#9 Sep 23, 2013
"There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know."

Donald Rumsfeld

...i still don't know if he was just having sport with us....

Level 9

Since: Feb 12

Location hidden

#10 Sep 23, 2013
Old Sam wrote:
"There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know."
Donald Rumsfeld
...i still don't know if he was just having sport with us....
...or quoting a member of congress...

AIias - Trish
Level 5

Since: Mar 13

Location hidden

#11 Sep 23, 2013
Normal people make me nervous
??

Level 8

Since: Dec 08

Fairfield, OH

#12 Sep 24, 2013
Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics.

“..i can't STAND her....and”

Since: Jun 08

...i don't want him..WTF?.....

#13 Sep 24, 2013
"When I die, I hope they don't cremate me 'cuz I'll burn forever."

Harry Caray

Level 8

Since: Dec 08

Fairfield, OH

#14 Sep 25, 2013
Love your enemies. It makes them so damned mad

“..i can't STAND her....and”

Since: Jun 08

...i don't want him..WTF?.....

#15 Sep 25, 2013
...just 'cause yer paranoid doesn't mean they *aren't* out to getcha......

(don't remember who said that...but i remember laffin'.....)

Level 8

Since: Oct 08

Location hidden

#16 Sep 25, 2013
"Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience."

-Greg King

Level 8

Since: Dec 08

Fairfield, OH

#17 Sep 26, 2013
"Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else."

Level 8

Since: Oct 08

Location hidden

#18 Sep 27, 2013
"Mommy, did you eat the baby?"

-A wide-eyed three year old who was staring at her mother's belly (my friend) in amazement

AIias - Trish
Level 5

Since: Mar 13

Location hidden

#19 Sep 27, 2013
Whatever doesn't make you stronger makes you ... bitter.

Wait! That's not very funny.
:)

AIias - Trish
Level 5

Since: Mar 13

Location hidden

#20 Sep 27, 2013
You are not drunk if you lie of the floor without holding on.
~Dean Martin

“So it's not you, It's them?”

Level 9

Since: Jun 11

Location hidden

#21 Sep 27, 2013
"Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?"

George Carlin

Tell me when this thread is updated:

Subscribe Now Add to my Tracker
First Prev
of 3
Next Last

Add your comments below

Characters left: 4000

Please note by submitting this form you acknowledge that you have read the Terms of Service and the comment you are posting is in compliance with such terms. Be polite. Inappropriate posts may be removed by the moderator. Send us your feedback.

Weird Discussions

Title Updated Last By Comments
News Police arrest man nicknamed 'Butter' who dresse... 5 min wichita-rick 15
Make up your wildest Headline. (Aug '08) 14 min Spotted Girl 645
What song are you listening to right now? (Apr '08) 15 min Sharlene45 197,465
News Evolution vs. Creation (Jul '11) 21 min Blitzking 204,921
Last Post Wins! (Aug '08) 29 min Knock off purse s... 146,532
Post any FOUR words (Feb '16) 30 min Knock off purse s... 1,190
News Weird noises are coming Apple complex (Feb '16) 32 min Hellary Clitass 40
JUST SAY SOMETHING. Whatever comes to mind!! (Aug '09) 33 min Knock off purse s... 33,218
Word Association 2 (Sep '13) 46 min Bezeer 19,791
Crystal_Clears Kitchen (Refurbished) (Jan '16) 4 hr Melt down 8,832
El's Kitchen (Feb '09) 4 hr 8541 MARINE 59,796
More from around the web