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#7102
Dec 13, 2013
 
JM_Brazil wrote:
<quoted text>
LOL!!
Coastal CT myself.
You been catching the normal hellish Connecticut winter weather where you are?

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#7103
Dec 13, 2013
 
The NFL is investigating game fixing on the Cleveland Browns, saying no team can actually be that bad.

“"Always Thinking"”

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Since: Nov 12

Greensburg, IN

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#7104
Dec 13, 2013
 
Hoof Arted wrote:
If our government were as strictly regulated as the cut off time for breakfast at McDonalds, there would be no problems with our economy.
Ain't it the truth!
Don't ever count on getting a Big Mac before 10 AM.

“"Always Thinking"”

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Greensburg, IN

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#7105
Dec 13, 2013
 
Oops!! I checked with GOOGLE and it's 10:30 AM
If you like wax museums , Zoos, and people watching,
go set in McDonalds until they start serving Big Macs.

“Hi!”

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Since: Jun 12

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#7106
Dec 13, 2013
 
Hoosier Hillbilly wrote:
Oops!! I checked with GOOGLE and it's 10:30 AM
If you like wax museums , Zoos, and people watching,
go set in McDonalds until they start serving Big Macs.
11:00 am on weekends! Lol

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#7107
Dec 14, 2013
 

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"Okay dad," my son said. "Show us what you got."
"Two pair," I said, slamming them down on the table.
"Well," he replied, laughing. "I've got three of a kind!"
"That's it!" I yelled. "These socks are going straight back to Wal Mart!"

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#7108
Dec 16, 2013
 
Cleveland Browns Head Coach Rob Chudzinski was stopped for speeding last night, but will not contest the charge, saying he'd take three points from anyone.
Parden Pard

Whitehall, PA

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#7109
Dec 16, 2013
 
Hoof Arted wrote:
Cleveland Browns Head Coach Rob Chudzinski was stopped for speeding last night, but will not contest the charge, saying he'd take three points from anyone.
At least,he's honest....

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#7110
Dec 17, 2013
 

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Did you hear that Lorena Bobbitt was in a car wreck?

Some dick cut her off.
hoppydankle

United States

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#7111
Dec 17, 2013
 

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This slick city man figured he'd go upstate and do some pheasant hunting.

With no regard to private property or trespassing signs, he barreled his big SUV up a little side road where he discovered a great looking field with the grass about chest high, Autumn Olive trees scattered throughout. Perfect spot!

He hadn't walked 30 feet when a big pheasant popped out of the grass and took to flight. BLAM! His first shot killed the bird and he watched it fall to the ground.

When he got to the area the grouse fell, he had to cross a fence to retrieve his quarry. He climbed over the fence, and just as he was about to pick up the bird, he heard a loud voice behind him.

A man was headed toward him and said,
"HEY! Wait just a minute! Do you know you're on private property?"

The city slicker replied, "No, sure didn't. Don't care either."

Agitated by the city slickers curt reply, the property owner said, "Well, since you're on private property, MY private property, that deems the downed pheasant is mine! But, if you don't want to get into trouble for hunting on private property, I shall make you an offer so you can keep the bird and go about your way."

The city slicker was curious about the offer and surely didn't want to get into trouble, so he inquired to the owner the nature of the offer.

The owner replied, "Well, it's kind of a game where we kick each other between the legs as hard as possible. The one who doesn't scream, cry, whimper, or make any sound whatsoever will win the pheasant."

The city slicker was over six feet tall and well built. He looked at the property owner, an old man, no more than 135 pounds. He knew he could kick the poor old man into oblivion. He took the ol man up on the offer.

"Good" The owner said. "I'll go first."

The city slicker got in a comfortable stance, his feet apart, crouching slightly.

The old man came over and judged the distance by swinging his foot from crotch to the ground. He finally got it sized up and reared his boot back and WHACK! Bullseye! Boot met gonads with thundering force and accuracy!

The city slicker gritted his teeth and tears filled his eyes. He shuddered for a few seconds an finally let out a deep breath. He was in some serious pain!

After about a minute or so of panting and walking around, gut throbbing, the city slicker finally composed himself enough to go to the property owner so he can give his big revenge kick. He scowled at the owner and snarled "YOUR TURN OLD MAN!"

Walking away, the owner said, "Ah, that's all right. You keep the pheasant. I've done killed twelve this week."
hoppydankle

United States

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#7112
Dec 17, 2013
 

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Pardon the insertion of grouse, didn't proofread thoroughly. : )

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#7113
Dec 18, 2013
 
Today is the last day to get your letters to the Post Office and be guaranteed delivery by Christmas.

In 2016.

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#7114
Dec 18, 2013
 
I'll bet Kim Jong-Un's family will be getting him some fantastic Christmas gifts this year.

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#7115
Dec 19, 2013
 

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A guy at work had his wife's name tattoo'd on his arm but got a divorce and had it removed.

He says that even though we all call him Lefty now, it was still worth it.

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#7116
Dec 19, 2013
 
Hoof Arted wrote:
I'll bet Kim Jong-Un's family will be getting him some fantastic Christmas gifts this year.
They got him a life size anatomically correct Dennis Rodman doll, oops, I mean they got him an actual Dennis Rodman. And bunkbeds.

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#7117
Dec 20, 2013
 

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"Your adorable," she texted.

"No," I replied. "YOU'RE adorable."

Now she likes me, and all I did was point out her typo.

“Hi!”

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#7118
Dec 20, 2013
 

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Hoof Arted wrote:
"Your adorable," she texted.

"No," I replied. "YOU'RE adorable."

Now she likes me, and all I did was point out her typo.
YOU'RE precious!

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#7119
Dec 21, 2013
 
Brandiiiiiiii wrote:
<quoted text>
YOU'RE precious!
No, YOU'RE precious!

“Proud White Woman for life!”

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Since: Apr 09

Spotted World

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#7120
Dec 21, 2013
 
What does a sperm cell and a lawyer have in common?

Both have a 1 in a million chance of turning into a human being.
Parden Pard

Whitehall, PA

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#7121
Dec 21, 2013
 

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Hoof Arted wrote:
<quoted text>
No, YOU'RE precious!
Everyone knows her as Brandiiii,,,,duhhhh,?

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