Offbeat Fox News

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#101 Jul 1, 2013
Big Time wrote:
<quoted text>
One more crack like that,...I'll knock hell outta you,..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v =x4AOhBaPY6MXX
But I cooked your eggs just the way you like em.

OWWWWWW! That hurt (RC Honey is knocked down landing on her face)

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#102 Jul 1, 2013
DondoDork wrote:
This just in from Dave's bar and grill:
A drunk Travis Pratt gets up from the bar and heads for the restroom. A few minutes later, a loud, bloodcurdling scream is heard. A few minutes after that, another loud scream reverberates through the bar. The bartender (Dave) goes to investigate why the drunk is screaming. "What's all the screaming about in there? You're scaring my customers!
"I'm just sitting here on the toilet and every time I try to flush, something comes up and squeezes my ballz."
With that, the bartender opens the door, looks in and says, "You idiot! You're sitting on the mop bucket!"
Tonight Dave's bar and grill will be hosting a soprano contest!
Please report back as to how that soprano contest went? TIA

“News Now”

Level 1

Since: Jun 13

Location hidden

#103 Jul 1, 2013
OH NO! This just in... Offbeat Fox News own reporter RC Honey has shower, and discovers first man hair on chin. In a desperate panic, takes razor and accidentally shaves off whole chin, in pain, she screams, leaps from her second floor window, and lands on face.

Offbeat Police and ambulance are slated to arrive any minute to save what's little left of her esteem/face.

Since: Jan 07

Location Shown

#104 Jul 1, 2013
R C Honey wrote:
<quoted text>But I cooked your eggs just the way you like em.
OWWWWWW! That hurt (RC Honey is knocked down landing on her face)

What Time is it,..



They're is a Clock on the Stove,..

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#106 Jul 1, 2013
I'm doing well Alias - Trish, I've been released and am ready to report for duty.

I will scope out the latest threads, what's popular, what's not,,, who's popular, who's not etc etc etc

Nice to see you!

First report of the evening

Why after only 20 mins is Alias - Trish have so many judge its? I mean, 20 minutes??? And already????

This reporter doesn't so much care that they're negative, it's just that someone cared enough to click their mouse that many times for her! Like I have said so many times,,, if only people could harness their power and use it for good!

This reporter is jealous! And this reporter believes that the judge its on her post are due to ONE poster, and not four.

More later!

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#107 Jul 1, 2013
This is RC Honey, and I've hit gold! Thank you to Alias - Trish, those suffering from sleep deprivation, can now rest easy to the relaxing noises of the wonders of outside sound effects.

The Sound of Crickets - 15 Minutes - Not Looped
&li st=PL4E984AEB5CB5EA69

Sleep easy, sleep well, fly into dreamland wrapped up in a cool sheet or warm blanket and drift into wonder land where anything can happen

RC Honey reporting

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#111 Jul 1, 2013
Dusty! DUSTY!! Dusty man, what's up??? What???? huh?

ewwwwwww,,, you're drolling... why? You have headphones on, what's up? What are you listening to?

What?

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#113 Jul 1, 2013
This is RC Honey

This thread, on fire AGAIN!

"Sex with a bicycle: Security camera catches man bonking a bike"

OMG what's wrong with you people??? Seriously???

Oh screw it, curiosity killed this cat, that's fricken hilarious. I admit!

Since: Jan 07

Location Shown

#114 Jul 2, 2013
She raised her little voice and testified,
I am a good girl
I've been one all my life
But her virtue was as swollen as her pride
She should've had the oscar
She must have been miscast
Her fifteen minutes went by so fast
I said, now, baby, have you got no shame?
She just looked at me, uncomprehendingly
Like cows at a passing train

Level 5

Since: Sep 12

Location hidden

#115 Jul 2, 2013
R C Honey wrote:
<quoted text>Am I David? Am I really? lol
You just keep being, that crazy cool chick, and you will be fine.:)

“News Now”

Level 1

Since: Jun 13

Location hidden

#116 Jul 3, 2013
This just in

RC Honey is running out of things to do/say, and will be taking a vacation! Due to extensive medical work to repair all the injuries she's sustained on the job of being our #1 Offbeat Fox News Reporter, she will also be checking herself into a mental facility as well after she's able to walk and show her severely damaged face in public.

She has told me that she is used to people pointing their fingers and laughing, but it is getting too much for her, as a lifetime of ridicule, and taunting has finally caught up to her.

She wants to thank you all for your support and well wishes.

This is Dusty McNuts wishing you all a pleasant day, and God speed!

Since: Jan 07

Location Shown

#117 Jul 4, 2013
If Dirt Were,...



We got the bubble headed
Bleached blonde
Comes on at five
She can tell you 'bout the plane crash
With a gleam in her eye
It's interesting when people die
Give us dirty laundry

Since: Jan 07

Location Shown

#118 Jul 4, 2013
RC gets A+ in Hotshots,...

“Maddie Mae”

Level 8

Since: Jun 11

Location hidden

#119 Jul 10, 2013
*********BREAKING NEWS**********

Who really ate all the Chocolate Moose Ice Cream?

Dork went to the freezer to pull out her favorite ice cream and it was GONE! Upon further inspection she found tiny little chocolate covered finger prints nearby. When she confronted her grandson his reply was, "grandpa ate it", after speaking with her husband his reply was, "baby Daniel must have eaten it"?

Conspiracy? They have since invoked their 5th. amendment rights and are no longer answering questions at this time!

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#120 Nov 13, 2013
Bumping this too! And will start re reporting 2morow!(if I'm not busy)

You're welcome!

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#121 Nov 13, 2013
DondoDork wrote:
*********BREAKING NEWS**********
Who really ate all the Chocolate Moose Ice Cream?
Dork went to the freezer to pull out her favorite ice cream and it was GONE! Upon further inspection she found tiny little chocolate covered finger prints nearby. When she confronted her grandson his reply was, "grandpa ate it", after speaking with her husband his reply was, "baby Daniel must have eaten it"?
Conspiracy? They have since invoked their 5th. amendment rights and are no longer answering questions at this time!
hahah AWESOME! Thank you Offbeat Fox News Affiliate!

Level 9

Since: Jan 08

Location hidden

#122 Nov 13, 2013
wver since the topix game ended I can not seem to find where to log out of topix. Help!?

Since: Jan 07

Location Shown

#123 Nov 14, 2013
Right above the posting box

You are currently logged in as (whoever you are trolling as) Not (whoever you are trolling as)? in blue Click that

“News Now”

Level 1

Since: Jun 13

Location hidden

#124 Dec 10, 2013
I am happy to report that Offbeat Fox News is out of bankruptcy and ready to go back to reporting the latest and the greatest on Offbeat. The station`s news reporter affiliates are standing by ready to give you the most current up to date news on the goings on of Offbeat. More later!

This is Dusty McNuts standing by, stay tuned

“News Now”

Level 1

Since: Jun 13

Location hidden

#125 Dec 10, 2013
This is not new, however it is news.

Reports are coming in regarding Topix top bar on your computer. Why is it upside down, and why do you have to click the arrow to have it flip right side up?

Is that so Topix can do away with computer spam? Most posters find it an inconvenience. That, AND not being able to sign out of here. Is this Hotel Topix? You can sign in, but you can never leave (aka sign out)

More later

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