Did you ever stop and wonder...

Did you ever stop and wonder...

Posted in the Weird Forum

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“Beyond the rude!”

Level 3

Since: Nov 11

Location hidden

#1 Dec 2, 2011
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?
Why there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
Why you don't ever see the headline: "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why "abbreviated" is such a long word?
Why Doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why you have to click on "Start" to stop 'Windows'?
Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?
Why there isn't mouse flavoured cat food?
Who tastes dog food when it has a "new & improved" flavor?
Why people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their butt when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why your Obstetrician or Gynaecologist leaves the room when you get undressed - if they are going to look up there anyway?
Why Goofy stands erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
Why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes?
Why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Why sheep don't shrink when it rains?
Why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is congress the opposite of progress?
Why they call the airport "a terminal" if flying is supposedly so safe?
Who the first first person was to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
Who the first person was that said, "See that chicken there, I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum?"

“Beyond the rude!”

Level 3

Since: Nov 11

Location hidden

#2 Dec 2, 2011
Why the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, but can't fix a hole in a boat?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
What do you call male ballerinas?
If blind people can see their dreams? Do they dream??
That if Wile E. Coyote from the Road Runner had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Why the "Alphabet Song" and "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" have the same tune?
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's on the outside of your ass?
Why it is when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
How come we put a man on the moon before realising it would be a good idea to put wheels on suitcases?
Why brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells are forever?
How important someone has to be before they can be 'assassinated' rather than just plain 'murdered'?
How come "phonetically" is spelt with a "ph"?
Why a round pizza gets delivered in a square box?
Why people pay to go up in tall buildings, and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
When you get to heaven / paradise / nirvana, are you stuck wearing whatever you were buried or cremated in forever?
Why people say they "slept like a baby", when babies normally wake up every two hours?
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are dead?
How do blind people know when they are done wiping?
What would the speed of lightning be if it didn't zigzag?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but has to check when you say the paint is wet?
Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?
Whose idea was it to put an "s" in the word "lisp"?
Are there specially reserved parking spaces for "normal" people at the Special Olympics?
If you send someone 'Styrofoam', how do you pack it?
Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?
What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
Why don't women put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans?
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
If someone with a split personality threatens to commit suicide, is it a hostage situation?
If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?
How do they get deer to cross the road only at those yellow road signs?
Why is there Braille on a drive up ATM?
How do you give an oral test in sign language?
Why are there no seeing eye cat's?

“Beyond the rude!”

Level 3

Since: Nov 11

Location hidden

#3 Dec 2, 2011
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?

Why there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why you don't ever see the headline: "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why "abbreviated" is such a long word?

Why Doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why you have to click on "Start" to stop 'Windows'?

Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?

Why there isn't mouse flavoured cat food?

Who tastes dog food when it has a "new & improved" flavor?

Why people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why your Obstetrician or Gynaecologist leaves the room when you get undressed - if they are going to look up there anyway?

Why Goofy stands erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

Why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes?

Why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

Why sheep don't shrink when it rains?

Why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is congress the opposite of progress?

Why they call the airport "a terminal" if flying is supposedly so safe?

Who the first first person was to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

“Don't harsh my mellow, man!”

Level 8

Since: Aug 08

Great State of Oklahoma!

#4 Dec 2, 2011
LOL! Funny things to ponder!

“Beyond the rude!”

Level 3

Since: Nov 11

Location hidden

#5 Dec 2, 2011
My apologies for the third post, I blame Topix for the delayed post.

“Beyond the rude!”

Level 3

Since: Nov 11

Location hidden

#6 Dec 3, 2011
Why do we have to choose a language on the phone, when our National language is only one.

“Yeah, I'm a troll”

Level 5

Since: Feb 10

But so are you.

#9 Dec 3, 2011
DSilvermane wrote:
That if Wile E. Coyote from the Road Runner had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
Deep.

Level 8

Since: Jul 10

Location hidden

#10 Dec 3, 2011
roadrunner 7 wrote:
<quoted text>
Deep.
BEEP!!! How ya been?

“Yeah, I'm a troll”

Level 5

Since: Feb 10

But so are you.

#11 Dec 3, 2011
Laci Rae wrote:
<quoted text>
BEEP!!! How ya been?
My my, if it isn't Laci!!!

Very good indeed as a point of fact. How about yourself?

Level 8

Since: Jul 10

Location hidden

#12 Dec 3, 2011
roadrunner 7 wrote:
<quoted text>
My my, if it isn't Laci!!!
Very good indeed as a point of fact. How about yourself?
Never been better myself....miss posting with you =)

Level 3

Since: Apr 10

AOL

#13 Dec 3, 2011
Laci Rae wrote:
<quoted text>
Never been better myself....miss posting with you =)
I miss too! We have happy fun! Want go out! I take to nice place! Maybe later boom boom!

“Blue collar in paradise”

Level 3

Since: Mar 10

I did NOT miss a spot

#14 Dec 3, 2011
Nevermind Hiro there. He has been buffing his own eggroll for far too long.

SNORT!

Take care Laci, great to hear from you.

Level 8

Since: Jul 10

Location hidden

#15 Jan 4, 2012
just getting round to clearing tracker.....heck boys, lets ALL go out =)

Let's all go, down to Dumas Walker
We'll get a slaw, burger, fries and a bottle of skeet
Bring it on out to my boys and me

Since: Feb 09

Location hidden

#16 Jan 5, 2012
God No! thats too much thinking!
lol
Mullah Back Girl

Medford, NY

#17 Jan 5, 2012
Did you ever stop and wonder...

....If God exists....or was religion just "made up" in order to control people and/or quell peoples fear of death?

Level 9

Since: Jul 11

Location hidden

#18 Jan 5, 2012
Ever wonder how life would be if with someone or alone?

Level 8

Since: Jul 10

Location hidden

#19 Jan 5, 2012
Mullah Back Girl wrote:
Did you ever stop and wonder...
....If God exists....or was religion just "made up" in order to control people and/or quell peoples fear of death?
Now gurl!!!! You know he's real, didnt you see Sister Act
!?!?!?

Level 8

Since: Jul 10

Location hidden

#20 Jan 5, 2012
honeymylove wrote:
Ever wonder how life would be if with someone or alone?
I did & then I did something about it...Id rather be alone for the rest of my life than be miserable...then my miracle came alone....

Level 9

Since: Jul 11

Location hidden

#21 Jan 5, 2012
Have you ever wondering when are things going to get better for you?

“Fairyland”

Level 8

Since: Dec 06

#22 Jan 5, 2012
I stop and wonder EVERY DAY..

so, just skimming the surface >>

Why am 'I' here..

are others and the world
just a figment of 'my' imagination.

IS there a GODHEAD.

Why does this world exist at all

Who ordained the GREAT PLAN

What .. if I were someone else -
a male a cat - a frog - a dog.
How different would life be.

How my dog has NO conception of 'time'
nor has she a name for ANY items she sees
daily... every time our eyes fall on an item
we have a name for that 'thing'
a bridge, a cup, a car, a road, bus, bed ....... etc etc, etc..

They have NO name for anything,
they see [I imagine] an assortment of things!

Is there a hereafter

Reincarnation:

Do we return as other life forms.

Is there life on other planets
what kind 'advanced''backward'

How different are other beings from us

Is LOVE the ultimate connection.

and ...

Why is the "LOVE" instinct so EXTRAORDINARILY strong.

Why the closeness we have with other animals

Is there life on other planets

Are we being watched by other beings
from outer space
[that is, of course, apart from Topix Trolls] lol [jk]

Why did Mozart ... Bach .. Beethoven .. the Beatles.. Bob Marley and others
write such extraordinary music/songs.

Why does a baby's smile
and the innocent eyes of a dog 'pull
at your heartstrings' EVERY time..

to mention
but .. a few.

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