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“<3”

Level 9

Since: Jun 10

Black Rock City, NV

#370 Aug 21, 2013
_Susan_ wrote:
<quoted text>
Too bad she's no longer with us!
Heeehee. We need Mrs. Ricky sock to keep him working, too.

“Incorrupta fides, nudaque veri”

Level 9

Since: May 07

Vincit qui se vincit

#371 Aug 21, 2013
_Susan_ wrote:
<quoted text>
Too bad she's no longer with us!
Sorry to hear that and I missed the funeral! Was everyone there and all tore up over her demise?

“Incorrupta fides, nudaque veri”

Level 9

Since: May 07

Vincit qui se vincit

#372 Aug 21, 2013
-Persephone- wrote:
<quoted text>Heeehee. We need Mrs. Ricky sock to keep him working, too.
I'm already working overtime, I don't need more work! lol

“<3”

Level 9

Since: Jun 10

Black Rock City, NV

#373 Aug 21, 2013
Ricky F wrote:
<quoted text>I'm already working overtime, I don't need more work! lol
Yes you do!

Wouldn’t you really love to do this?

After a tiring day, a commuter settled down in his seat and closed his eyes.
As the train rolled out of the station, the young woman sitting next to him pulled
out her cell phone and started talking in a loud voice:
"Hi sweetheart. It's Mary. I'm on the train".
"Yes, I know it's the six thirty and not the four thirty, but I had a long meeting".
"No, honey, not with that Kevin from the accounting office. It was with the boss".
"No sweetheart, you're the only one in my life".
"Yes, I'm sure, cross my heart!"
Fifteen minutes later, she was still talking loudly.

When the man sitting next to her had enough, he leaned over and said into the phone,
"Mary, hang up the phone and come back to bed."

Mary doesn't use her cell phone in public any longer.


Level 9

Since: Jun 10

Location hidden

#374 Aug 21, 2013
Ricky F wrote:
<quoted text>Sorry to hear that and I missed the funeral! Was everyone there and all tore up over her demise?
Yes, poor Mrs Sublime, she had many admirers. lol

Level 9

Since: Jun 10

Location hidden

#375 Aug 21, 2013
-Persephone- wrote:
<quoted text>Yes you do!
Wouldn’t you really love to do this?
After a tiring day, a commuter settled down in his seat and closed his eyes.
As the train rolled out of the station, the young woman sitting next to him pulled
out her cell phone and started talking in a loud voice:
"Hi sweetheart. It's Mary. I'm on the train".
"Yes, I know it's the six thirty and not the four thirty, but I had a long meeting".
"No, honey, not with that Kevin from the accounting office. It was with the boss".
"No sweetheart, you're the only one in my life".
"Yes, I'm sure, cross my heart!"
Fifteen minutes later, she was still talking loudly.
When the man sitting next to her had enough, he leaned over and said into the phone,
"Mary, hang up the phone and come back to bed."
Mary doesn't use her cell phone in public any longer.
LOL

“ON TRAIL W / DONKEY!”

Level 5

Since: Oct 08

I HAVE BAD JOCK ITCH!

#376 Sep 9, 2013
_Susan_ wrote:
<quoted text>
Yes, poor Mrs Sublime, she had many admirers. lol
I's kinda had crush on her, Voyeur had hots for her and want to take her on Donkey ride through village!

Level 9

Since: Jun 10

Location hidden

#377 Sep 9, 2013
Voyeur wrote:
<quoted text>I's kinda had crush on her, Voyeur had hots for her and want to take her on Donkey ride through village!
I'll be sure to tell her. She's with Sublime right now.

“ON TRAIL W / DONKEY!”

Level 5

Since: Oct 08

I HAVE BAD JOCK ITCH!

#378 Oct 8, 2013
A funeral service is being held for a man who has just passed away. At the end of the service, the pall bearers are carrying the casket out when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket. They hear a faint moan! They open the casket and find that the man is actually alive! He lives for ten more years, and then dies. Once again, a ceremony is held, and at the end of it, the pallbearers are again carrying out the
casket. As they carry the casket towards the door, the wife cries out: "Watch that wall!"

“ON TRAIL W / DONKEY!”

Level 5

Since: Oct 08

I HAVE BAD JOCK ITCH!

#379 Oct 8, 2013
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?

(1) You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
-- Alan, age 10

(2) No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with.
-- Kirsten, age 10

WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

(1) Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
-- Camille, age 10

(2) No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married.
-- Freddie, age 6 (very wise for his age)

HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

(1) You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
-- Derrick, age 8

WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?

(1) Both don't want any more kids.
-- Lori, age 8

WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

(1) Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
-- Lynnette, age 8 (isn't she a treasure)

(2) On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
-- Martin, age 10 (wise beyond his years)

WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?

(1) I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.
-- Craig, age 9

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

(1) When they're rich.
-- Pam, age 7

(2) The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
-- Curt, age 7

(3) The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do.
-- Howard, age 8 (this one has very good morals)

IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

(1) It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
-- Mike Schaffer, age 4 (bless you child)

HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?

(1) There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
-- Kelvin, age 8

And the #1 Favorite is........

HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

(1) Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck.
-- David, age 10

“Incorrupta fides, nudaque veri”

Level 9

Since: May 07

Vincit qui se vincit

#380 Oct 9, 2013
Pufffff puffff couch cough cooough...pass

“<3”

Level 9

Since: Jun 10

Black Rock City, NV

#381 Oct 9, 2013
*pee ewwww* What is that smell?

-----fifteen minutes later

Huh? Sup dude?

Man, you got some M&Ms round here?

“Incorrupta fides, nudaque veri”

Level 9

Since: May 07

Vincit qui se vincit

#382 Oct 9, 2013
-Persephone- wrote:
*pee ewwww* What is that smell?
-----fifteen minutes later
Huh? Sup dude?
Man, you got some M&Ms round here?
LMAO!

You have that down pretty good! Hmmmm....

“<3”

Level 9

Since: Jun 10

Black Rock City, NV

#383 Oct 9, 2013
Ricky F wrote:
<quoted text>LMAO!
You have that down pretty good! Hmmmm....
:)

“ON TRAIL W / DONKEY!”

Level 5

Since: Oct 08

I HAVE BAD JOCK ITCH!

#384 Oct 25, 2013
A cop stops a car for traveling faster than the posted speed limit.
He asks the man his name. "Fred," he replies.

"Fred what?" the officer asks.
"Just Fred," the man responds
The officer is in a good mood and thinks he might just give the fellow a break and write him out a warning instead of a ticket.
The officer then presses him for the last name. The man tells him that he used to have a last name but lost it. The officer thinks that he has a nut case on his hands but plays along with it.

"Tell me, Fred, how did you lose your last name?"

The man replies, "It's a long story, so stay with me."

"I was born Fred Dingaling. I know -- a funny last name. The kids used to tease me all the time. So I stayed to myself, studied hard, and got good grades. When I got older I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. I went through college, medical school, internship, residency, and finally got my degree, so I was Fred Dingaling, MD.

"After a while I got bored being a doctor, so I decided to go back to school. Dentistry was my dream! Got all the way through school, got my degree, so then I was Fred Dingaling, MD, DDS.

"Got bored doing dentistry, so I started fooling around with my assistant and she gave me VD. So now I was Fred Dingaling, MD, DDS, with VD.

Well, the ADA found out about the VD, so they took away my DDS. Then I was Fred Dingaling, MD with VD.

Then the AMA found out about the ADA taking away my DDS because of the VD, so they took away my MD leaving me as Fred Dingaling with VD.

Then the VD took away my Dingaling, so now I am Just Fred."

The officer walked away in tears... laughing.

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