Lets hear it facebook/relationship

Posted in the Topix Forum

disgruntled

Huntington, WV

#1 May 17, 2013
Is it ok for your fiancÚ that you love to death and are very serious about to add a person as a friend that they have had sex with and that is/was friends with their ex who has caused a lot of problems in our relationship and then tell you they didn't add them but you have proof they did? Also they are the ones throwing a fit and I'm just hurt because of it. I feel that she should have been there for me instead of acting pissy. Lets hear your opinions please.

Level 4

Since: Mar 13

New Market, IN

#2 May 17, 2013
How long have you been together? Was the sex before or after you started dating? Bottom Line is they shouldn't have lied about adding them as a friend. Trust is a very BIG part of the relationship.
Patterns Do Not Lie

Anonymous Proxy

#3 May 17, 2013
disgruntled wrote:
Is it ok for your fianc├ę that you love to death and are very serious about to add a person as a friend that they have had sex with and that is/was friends with their ex who has caused a lot of problems in our relationship and then tell you they didn't add them but you have proof they did? Also they are the ones throwing a fit and I'm just hurt because of it. I feel that she should have been there for me instead of acting pissy. Lets hear your opinions please.
They're still having sex. Are you okay with that?
disgruntled

Huntington, WV

#4 May 17, 2013
We have been together about a year and a half but have been living together bout the same time. I agree that she should have told the truth about that but on top of it she was looking at his profile right in front of me and acted like I had no right to be hurt or upset. We live in our own little bubble and don't talk to many others and she makes me feel really loved until anything at all comes up and she acts like I never have any right to say how I feel. Every time I tell her that something makes me feel bad or hurt she usually just acts as if it's stupid or tells me its stupid. I would never do anything like that at all to her and if I did I would console her and at least tell her in sorry when someone is already hurt if you really love them I don't feel you should be like that to a person that is hurting. I just care about her so much it doesn't take a lot to hurt me. There is a reason people from your past are in your past, its because they're supposed to stay there. Even if she never see's the guy or talks to him I just still think it is super shitty to act like that. It makes me feel like shit and I told her and left for a few hours and she didn't call or even wonder where I was or anything and I feel I should have gotten an apology for it because I know I would have if I did something like that but nope not here...Nothing. I don't feel that it's being controlling or whinny I just can't stand it and its obviously not a big deal to her. I want nothing more than to be with her forever but this kinda thing pops up from time to time and every time I have to just deal with it and I feel it is total bullshit because I would never do anything like that and I am a total gentleman not a cheater or a liar at all I have never lied to her or cheated.
disgruntled

Huntington, WV

#5 May 17, 2013
I hope not!I don't think it's that but it could be eventually. Who knows I mean I could definitely see why it would look that way.Thats what I mean it's a way bigger deal than she thinks and it shouldn't be taken lightly.
disgruntled

Huntington, WV

#6 May 17, 2013
they had sex way before we met years before we have been together 2 years
disgruntled

Huntington, WV

#7 May 17, 2013
Sex is sex no matter. In my opinion if you're trying to have a healthy, respectful, serious long term relationship there should be nothing to do with in anyway, shape or form any interaction with people that have been with you in that way. I find it completely disrespectful to do things like that to someone you're supposed to love and care for and if it does happen I think you should apologize for it and genuinely be sorry and understand that it is wrong. She has to much pride for that though, she would let me walk before she would ever sit down, think about it, suck it up and upper me know I mean enough to her to do.
disgruntled

Huntington, WV

#8 May 17, 2013
If I did the same thing to her I doubt we would even be together any longer
Truth Is

Anonymous Proxy

#9 May 17, 2013
If you think she's cheating, she's definitely cheating.

If you DON'T think she's cheating, she's probably cheating ;)

Have A Nice Day :)

Level 8

Since: Mar 12

Sugar Land, TX

#10 May 17, 2013
If he didn't abuse her in anyway...then there's no reason why she shouldn't be friends with her ex.

Yes,She should have told you.

Yes,
you sound way to controlling.
disgruntled

Huntington, WV

#11 May 17, 2013
I there's there would be a dumb fuck in the crowd just wanting to talk shit. It has nothing to do with her ex if you'll read! Also sounds like you're just another heart breaking bitch that failed to see how much I said I loved her and wanted her in my life till the day in dead. Believe it or not some guys are really good guys that put in everything they can and ask for genuine advice so their relationship lasts. Girls don't value a good guy these days they just stereotype them together because alot of them are shit doesn't mean they all are and its just the same with girls. There's good in them all just because most aren't alot of people lose out on true love.
the fiance

Huntington, WV

#12 May 17, 2013
I am not cheating I work and come home I spend every second with him (not complaining) I had no intention of being friends with a man I had known before I met him on fb and nothing more .. There was not one message sent back or forth it was simply a notification that we were now friends that started this whole thing . I did get on the page of this man looking through pictures out of boredom in front of him which should show that I wasn't trying to hide anything I didn't see it as a big deal really and let it be noted that I deleted the man asap ... I got upset because I love my man with all my heart and it hurts that he has such little faith in the fact that I would never deliberately do something to make him think that I want anyone else in my life. Something as simple as a "friend" on fb shouldn't change anything... He has my password he has the phone I never log out and I hide nothing I don't feel I should have to and I refuse to live a life of secrets.. His exs have done him wrong cheated and such but i would never and i did apologize.. Not really in a timely manner but if you love me the way you say you do and i know you do trust should definitely be there because i have never done anything to make you think any different!

“Illegitimi non carborundum”

Since: Apr 10

...

#13 May 18, 2013
Disgruntled sounds very controlling, insecure and appears to be isolating the fiancee which is a red flag for the potential for abuse. Fiancee, does disgruntled ever put you down? Complain if you don't do things his way? The simple fact that he doesn't allow you the right to your privacy by having your passwords is enough for me to say RUN. You both need counseling. Him, to let go of the past and his controlling abusive ways, and her to determine why she allows it to happen. He has no trust in the relationship and a relationship without trust is headed for failure.

Level 6

Since: Mar 13

Location hidden

#14 May 18, 2013
I think it was wrong of her to be friending someone she had sex with and lie about it. Lies don't help a relationship. Never trust a liar you never know what else they have been lying about.
Fuckblackpeople

Huntington, WV

#15 May 18, 2013
DazzleDat, sounds to me like you need to get yourself a fucking life. I mean with 13,000 and some odd posts it is clear to see your loser ass does nothing but sit in the background and get involved in shit you know nothing about. It looks to me that the person asked for advice not bullshit bashing and saying they're abusive because you don't know them. You have 13,000 posts so you obviously have no relationship and therefore need to sit this one out.
Jame Gumb

Anonymous Proxy

#17 May 20, 2013
Fuckblackpeople wrote:
DazzleDat, sounds to me like you need to get yourself a fucking life. I mean with 13,000 and some odd posts it is clear to see your loser ass does nothing but sit in the background and get involved in shit you know nothing about. It looks to me that the person asked for advice not bullshit bashing and saying they're abusive because you don't know them. You have 13,000 posts so you obviously have no relationship and therefore need to sit this one out.
With an average of a out 12 posts a day, she doesn't exactly look like an addict.
You should take some remedial math classes.

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