Does liking transexuals make you gay?

“Protestant, Gay, Libertarian”

Since: Apr 08

Long Island, NY

#135 Jan 19, 2009
LOST GIRL wrote:
Hi everyone, i'm a female currently engaged to a man. I just recently discovered that he was talking to people on a transsexual dating site. I have nothing against transsexuals, for one, one of my very good friends is a transsexual. But I am completely shocked and dont know how to go about asking him about it. I'm lost. and heart broken. please someone give me some advice. does this mean hes gay? or bi-sexual?
If the person still has their "equipment" (many people prefer to live this way. I know because I lived with a person and was engaged to a person like this, and also also dated many), then I would say they are gay. I'm gay and know this from personal sexual experience. And I LOVE semi-transgendered people.

Hope this helps.

PEACE !

:)
that guy

Buffalo, NY

#137 Feb 10, 2009
i am too all about trannies, but only if they look good.i dont consider myself gay at all, the thought of being with an actual man disgusts me. then again a good lookin tranny turns me on with knowing they have the male plumbing downstairs.

Since: Jan 09

Round Lake, IL

#138 Feb 10, 2009
Tomeka wrote:
Hi I am Tomeka. I am a transexual, which some of you already know. Personally I feel that if a man likes a transexual does not make him gay. But I do not want to steal the thunder from these two videos made by a transeuxal friend of mine explaining this perfectly as she always do.
www.youtube.com/watch...
www.youtube.com/watch...
A guy liking a transsexual doesn't make him gay unless the tranny still has it's parts and the guy in question knows and still proceeds with intercourse. Of course, there is exception to every rule. One being love. There are a lot of trannys out there who look better than actual females/males.
that guy

Buffalo, NY

#139 Feb 10, 2009
i believe that it is a part of kinky desires, a chance to have a taste of the forbidden. i believe there are alot of males like this, but ashamed of it as am i. dont get me wrong i love women, i just am kinky
that guy

Buffalo, NY

#140 Feb 10, 2009
here is an article i read.........."Does Dating a Transsexual Make Me a Homosexual or Even a Transsexual?
The short answers to the above question is 'no.' Your sexual orientation is whatever you define it to be. Generally most men who date transsexuals do not define themselves as gay. The vast majority are also not perceived as gay by others, although sometimes bigoted people will try to push their opinion of who is gay on you. Dating a transsexual may mean that after discussing disclosure with your partner, either one or both of you may want to 'forewarn' your family and friends that your girlfriend is overcoming a medical problem. By and large, most good people seem perfectly willing to accept loving couples who are compatible. Interestingly, there are even couples where the male partner might not necessarily have chosen a transsexual woman, but love brought two people together for a successful relationship.

If you are a man that likes to crossdress, or secretly has girlish feelings, there is a possibility you may have repressed gender issues. Occasionally men will date transsexuals because their curiosity goes beyond attraction or they want to live vicariously through another's experiences. Whatever your situation, make certain to discuss this before entering into a relationship, because not every transsexual would be interested in dating another transgender person."

“Monogamy Rocks”

Since: Nov 08

CT

#141 Feb 10, 2009
LOST GIRL wrote:
Hi everyone, i'm a female currently engaged to a man. I just recently discovered that he was talking to people on a transsexual dating site. I have nothing against transsexuals, for one, one of my very good friends is a transsexual. But I am completely shocked and dont know how to go about asking him about it. I'm lost. and heart broken. please someone give me some advice. does this mean hes gay? or bi-sexual?
Uh, I think you are missing the bigger picture. The first issue should not be about his sexual orientation, but rather why is he on a dating site of any kind if you two are engaged. This speaks to a challenge but should not be a deal killer.

Guys who are engaged, especially for the first time, do some crazy stuff that in the moment they have no idea why they are doing it and often have feelings of self loathing why they are engaged in the activity. In some cases, they want to get a bunch of crap out of their system before the “shackles” of marriage.

Here is some advice… Confront him directly about being on “a dating site” but leave the whole transsexual thing out… for now. Just say you saw something about dating… and leave the rest out. Give him a chance to explain himself. He will either admit to it or deny it.

Hopefully, he will just admit that he is nervous about settling down and was acting weird… and apologize. He may also deny it, get angry, and storm out… probably trying to make you feel like the bad guy.

What you do not want to do is share with any friends or family that he was on a transgender site… if you need to confide with someone just say it was a dating site. Here is the reason, he will most likely want to reconcile and apologize.

Chances are your fiancé is completely straight and while there is nothing wrong with anyone who is transgendered, gay, or bi-sexual he will likely feel a great deal of shame if he knows other people that he will likely see again (your friends and family) will have this knowledge.
RealityDealer

Columbus, OH

#142 Feb 10, 2009
LOST GIRL wrote:
Hi everyone, i'm a female currently engaged to a man. I just recently discovered that he was talking to people on a transsexual dating site. I have nothing against transsexuals, for one, one of my very good friends is a transsexual. But I am completely shocked and dont know how to go about asking him about it. I'm lost. and heart broken. please someone give me some advice. does this mean hes gay? or bi-sexual?
He would arguably be BI-sexual if he is regularly having sex with pre-op transsexuals.

If he is just interested in experimenting, only had sex a few times with transsexuals, and is mainly attracted to women than that would arguably be BI-curious.

Gay would be that he only has sex with men. If he is dating and having sex with you (assuming your a woman) or women, in addition to men, than he is NOT gay.
RealityDealer

Columbus, OH

#143 Feb 10, 2009
MessyJessie wrote:
<quoted text>
A guy liking a transsexual doesn't make him gay unless the tranny still has it's parts and the guy in question knows and still proceeds with intercourse. Of course, there is exception to every rule. One being love. There are a lot of trannys out there who look better than actual females/males.
It is interesting how people go for the more extreme label of GAY and overlook bi-sexual.

GAY would be mainly having sex with men and mostly attracted to men.

A guy with a girlfriend that has some sexual adventures on the side with transsexuals would usually NOT be gay, but bi.
Join Free
RealityDealer

Columbus, OH

#144 Feb 10, 2009
Rationality on hold wrote:
<quoted text>
Uh, I think you are missing the bigger picture. The first issue should not be about his sexual orientation, but rather why is he on a dating site of any kind if you two are engaged. This speaks to a challenge but should not be a deal killer.
Guys who are engaged, especially for the first time, do some crazy stuff that in the moment they have no idea why they are doing it and often have feelings of self loathing why they are engaged in the activity. In some cases, they want to get a bunch of crap out of their system before the “shackles” of marriage.
Here is some advice… Confront him directly about being on “a dating site” but leave the whole transsexual thing out… for now. Just say you saw something about dating… and leave the rest out. Give him a chance to explain himself. He will either admit to it or deny it.
Hopefully, he will just admit that he is nervous about settling down and was acting weird… and apologize. He may also deny it, get angry, and storm out… probably trying to make you feel like the bad guy.
What you do not want to do is share with any friends or family that he was on a transgender site… if you need to confide with someone just say it was a dating site. Here is the reason, he will most likely want to reconcile and apologize.
Chances are your fiancé is completely straight and while there is nothing wrong with anyone who is transgendered, gay, or bi-sexual he will likely feel a great deal of shame if he knows other people that he will likely see again (your friends and family) will have this knowledge.
A huge problem in heterosexual relationships is when women are excessively insecure, so see dating sites or even porn as direct threats to their relationship and even get jealous.

A girlfriend/wife should allow her boyfriend/husband some privacy and some freedom.

With that said, the best policy is that both can be honest about their sexual desires and feelings.

It is the dishonesty, jealousy, control games, and insecurity that will destroy many relationships.

The girlfriend/wife would do better to engage in honest and open conversations with her boyfriend/husband so that she can achieve a better understanding of him and for her to be honest with herself too.

Since: Jan 09

Round Lake, IL

#145 Feb 11, 2009
RealityDealer wrote:
<quoted text>
It is interesting how people go for the more extreme label of GAY and overlook bi-sexual.
GAY would be mainly having sex with men and mostly attracted to men.
A guy with a girlfriend that has some sexual adventures on the side with transsexuals would usually NOT be gay, but bi.
I see you point, I do, but I don't believe the whole "bi" concept. You either are or aren't. And I do realize that men can like women AND men and sleep with both but if a man is still sleeping with other men, he is gay, regardless. But, I am one person with one opinion. I hope you can respect that.

Since: Jan 09

Round Lake, IL

#146 Feb 11, 2009
RealityDealer wrote:
<quoted text>
A huge problem in heterosexual relationships is when women are excessively insecure, so see dating sites or even porn as direct threats to their relationship and even get jealous.
A girlfriend/wife should allow her boyfriend/husband some privacy and some freedom.
With that said, the best policy is that both can be honest about their sexual desires and feelings.
It is the dishonesty, jealousy, control games, and insecurity that will destroy many relationships.
The girlfriend/wife would do better to engage in honest and open conversations with her boyfriend/husband so that she can achieve a better understanding of him and for her to be honest with herself too.
Pornographic material is okay but dating websites? Are you sure? If your mate is seeking solace or whatever outside of the relationship through dating websites or the like, then yes, there is a big problem, whether it's his fault or her fault or a combination of both. It's not jealousy and dating sites are NOT condusive to a great relationship.

“Monogamy Rocks”

Since: Nov 08

CT

#147 Feb 11, 2009
MessyJessie wrote:
<quoted text>
Pornographic material is okay but dating websites? Are you sure? If your mate is seeking solace or whatever outside of the relationship through dating websites or the like, then yes, there is a big problem, whether it's his fault or her fault or a combination of both. It's not jealousy and dating sites are NOT condusive to a great relationship.
I agree completely... A wife can certainly roll her eyes when she sees what porn sites he has visited... but a dating site speaks to a serious issue in the relationship.

Fortunately, for my wife and I, this site is as racy as we get (at least as far as internet use… the bedroom is a whole different story…LOL)

Since: Jan 09

Round Lake, IL

#148 Feb 11, 2009
Rationality on hold wrote:
<quoted text>
I agree completely... A wife can certainly roll her eyes when she sees what porn sites he has visited... but a dating site speaks to a serious issue in the relationship.
Fortunately, for my wife and I, this site is as racy as we get (at least as far as internet use… the bedroom is a whole different story…LOL)
Well with porno's, you both can fantasize together and create your own porno. Not recommended for first time daters though.

“Monogamy Rocks”

Since: Nov 08

CT

#149 Feb 11, 2009
MessyJessie wrote:
<quoted text>
Well with porno's, you both can fantasize together and create your own porno. Not recommended for first time daters though.
I agree, but my my wife and I feel that mirrors in the bedroom are better than porn (plus...LOL...makes certain that we both go to the gym 4 - 5 days a week.)
philip wales

Penshaw, UK

#150 Feb 11, 2009
a trany gave me the biggest seeing to ever,it was great at time but net morning biggest dong ever,but bloody convincing women,good kisser smelt divine,but hard rider

“Protestant, Gay, Libertarian”

Since: Apr 08

Long Island, NY

#151 Feb 11, 2009
philip wales wrote:
a trany gave me the biggest seeing to ever,it was great at time but net morning biggest dong ever,but bloody convincing women,good kisser smelt divine,but hard rider
Can you speak English intelligently so someone can understand you ?

Since: Jan 09

Round Lake, IL

#152 Feb 11, 2009
Rationality on hold wrote:
<quoted text>
I agree, but my my wife and I feel that mirrors in the bedroom are better than porn (plus...LOL...makes certain that we both go to the gym 4 - 5 days a week.)
LMAO! Oh, most certainly. ;-)

Since: Jan 09

Round Lake, IL

#153 Feb 11, 2009
Daniel P from Long Island wrote:
<quoted text>
Can you speak English intelligently so someone can understand you ?
Oh, I agree with you there.

“Monogamy Rocks”

Since: Nov 08

CT

#154 Feb 11, 2009
MessyJessie wrote:
<quoted text>
LMAO! Oh, most certainly. ;-)
Problem is... sometimes getting just the right angle can be a challenge... lots of laughs though.

Our favorite is her on the exercise ball (well…ok…my favorite…LOL.) One day at the gym last year I was watching her work out with the darn thing OMG how hot… I mentioned it in passing that evening.

Our kids were very confused on why she and I were laughing hysterically Christmas morning when I opened one as a gift.

“Monogamy Rocks”

Since: Nov 08

CT

#155 Feb 11, 2009
RealityDealer wrote:
<quoted text>
A huge problem in heterosexual relationships is when women are excessively insecure, so see dating sites or even porn as direct threats to their relationship and even get jealous.
A girlfriend/wife should allow her boyfriend/husband some privacy and some freedom.
With that said, the best policy is that both can be honest about their sexual desires and feelings.
It is the dishonesty, jealousy, control games, and insecurity that will destroy many relationships.
The girlfriend/wife would do better to engage in honest and open conversations with her boyfriend/husband so that she can achieve a better understanding of him and for her to be honest with herself too.
I agree with some of what you are saying, however, looking at porn is fantasy... which can be ok in a relationship, however, a dating site means the "possibility" of a guy looking to hook up for real, or at minimum he is window shopping...rarely a good thing.

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