created by: Honesty truly | Nov 4, 2007

Human Sexuality

2,329 votes

Dominant / Submissive Sex and Play

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  • Does the idea disgust you
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  • Have you "play acted" it
  • Have you watched it on porn
  • Have you considered doing it
  • Are you too scared to do it
  • Have you tried it & hated it
  • Have you tried it & loved it
  • Do you practice it often
  • Is that your lifestyle

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Since: May 12

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#162
Oct 23, 2012
 

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Classic example of a wannabe...any sub/slave should be very causious...
Devotion, submission, and respect is a gift given by the sub and one that must be earned by the Dom.....
WasabiSabison wrote:
I Am A 29 Year Old Male Master. I Am Looking For The Following.....
#1: A Female Online Slave
#2: Some One That Knows How To Follow Orders
#3: Is Dedicated To Being A Slave ( Collard And Under Contract)
#4: Some One Who Has A Webcam
#5: Who Can Be Given Tasks And Complete Them.
If This Is You Then Message Me On Yahoo Messenger. Send Me Te Message 'What Do a you Wish Of Me Master' And We Will Talk More......
Older Master

UK

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#163
Oct 23, 2012
 

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55 yo old loves to dominate submIssive females 2979e9cf

Since: Dec 11

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#168
Oct 23, 2012
 

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WasabiSabison wrote:
<quoted text>
Then You My Friend Are A Fool.....
If You Read What I Write Instead of Make Assumptions I Have Merely Stated That Of Which Is A List Of What I’m Looking For.....
I Am No More A Wannabe Then You.....
As for Stating At The Bottom For When You Contact Me Please Send The Message What Do You Wish of Me master. That Is So I Know Who You Are From The Rest of The Everyday People That Message me So that I Might Give you Full Attention Rather Than Just Delete You As A Spammer. You Apparently Do Not Under Stand The Definition Of The Word Slave if You Did You Would Know That A Slaves Life Style Is Merely To Please And Do As Told With Out Question. It Takes A Good Master To Treat A Slave Well And With A Gentle Hand. Before You Bash Me Perhaps You Should Pull Your Head Out Of Your Butt And Know What The Hell Your talking About before You Judge Some One.....
The only thing you show that you are a Master of is the ability to cut, copy and paste. The first thing a Master is, is in control of himself; here you indicate you are completely out of control. Your use of caps for every word and the fact you have obviously misquoted the wrong posts is an indication of an anger issue.

Your definition of a slave shows you are clueless about the dynamics of M/s as well...
WasabiSabison wrote:
<quoted text>
You Apparently Do Not Under Stand The Definition Of The Word Slave if You Did You Would Know That A Slaves Life Style Is Merely To Please And Do As Told With Out Question.
A slave does not just give themselves over to just any one who calls himself a Master. It is a very long and slow process. First, it is the slave who selects the Master; who must first provide incentive to contact him and them he must prove himself worthy of another person’s submission and take time to earn immense trust before he can even consider making a demand. Second, the slave sets her own hard limits that the Dom must respect and she also establishes how much control she allows the Dom to have over her. If he continues to show he is worthy then she will allow him full control and give him the title of Master.

The way you are presenting yourself is in a very negative way and the type that gives BDSM a bad name; you come across as an angry domineering man which is completely different from a Dominant man in the lifestyle.

Since: Sep 12

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#170
Oct 23, 2012
 

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WasabiSabison wrote:
<quoted text>
You Aperently Need Some Schooling. For Every Masters Way Of Doing Things Is Their Own And Like No Others. How Master Treats Their Slave or slaves Is Diffrent From Another.....
As For My Caps Lock Is Is An OCD Issue I Am Working On....
Definition Of Slave Is For Some One To Give Full Control Of Themselfs To A Master. Yes It Some Times Can Be A Timely Process And Trust Does Take Time. How Ever. I Have Not Demanded Anything From Anyone. I Have Merely Stated What It Is That i Am looking For And How To Contact Me. So That When Someone Does Message Me I Know Who They Are Instead Of Spam.....
As For Anger Issues You Are The One That Was Quick To Judge Me Not The Other Way Around.....
As Far As My Abilities To Copy And Past They Are Quite Good. But If You Have Noticed I Am Sorta New To This Site And Not Sure How Everything Works So I Have By Mistake Posted To The Wrong Person. Sorry For Being Human. But I Will At Least Admit Im Wrong Can You?
I do not believe Jolene is wrong.

So nice of you to define "slave" in a nice little bundle like that.

If that's all a slave should do "Give full control of themselves over to "a Master"...i wonder why you feel the need to have them sign a contract? Seems so easy, so simple.

WOW. Maybe I should sign up to the WasabiSabion school for clueless subs and slaves?

Why do we even need to discuss dynamics, limits, rules, negotiations and safety? Why do a lot of you "guys" choose NOT to mention any of these things in your posts... i wonder?

So little thought put into something so very important.

Since: May 12

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#172
Oct 24, 2012
 

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As usual Jolene makes an excellent point and has tremendous insight. Jolene I couldnt agree with you more. Your profile states your collared, you must make yourself and your Master very proud. You are both insightful and well spoken.
jolene1985 wrote:
<quoted text>
The only thing you show that you are a Master of is the ability to cut, copy and paste. The first thing a Master is, is in control of himself; here you indicate you are completely out of control. Your use of caps for every word and the fact you have obviously misquoted the wrong posts is an indication of an anger issue.
Your definition of a slave shows you are clueless about the dynamics of M/s as well...
<quoted text>
A slave does not just give themselves over to just any one who calls himself a Master. It is a very long and slow process. First, it is the slave who selects the Master; who must first provide incentive to contact him and them he must prove himself worthy of another person’s submission and take time to earn immense trust before he can even consider making a demand. Second, the slave sets her own hard limits that the Dom must respect and she also establishes how much control she allows the Dom to have over her. If he continues to show he is worthy then she will allow him full control and give him the title of Master.
The way you are presenting yourself is in a very negative way and the type that gives BDSM a bad name; you come across as an angry domineering man which is completely different from a Dominant man in the lifestyle.

Since: May 12

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#173
Oct 24, 2012
 

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Points well taken Dorei...

I would also like to add for the wannabe consideration, the fact you know you have an OCD problem should lead you to be even more careful of how you present yourself. If you really understood what happens in D/s you would realize how humbling it is to receive the gift of submission and what an incrediable responsibilty it carries.

The self control and humility a Dom/Master shows is in fact part of the attraction. And lastely one cannt really call onself a Master, much like a black belt cannt be self professed, it takes training, mentoring, and learning from someone more experienced and usually that title is given by someone who is either respected or revered and thus the community can trust the process and title.

We are not here to bash anyone, only to educate and communicate for the betterment of the community.
Dorei wrote:
<quoted text>
I do not believe Jolene is wrong.
So nice of you to define "slave" in a nice little bundle like that.
If that's all a slave should do "Give full control of themselves over to "a Master"...i wonder why you feel the need to have them sign a contract? Seems so easy, so simple.
WOW. Maybe I should sign up to the WasabiSabion school for clueless subs and slaves?
Why do we even need to discuss dynamics, limits, rules, negotiations and safety? Why do a lot of you "guys" choose NOT to mention any of these things in your posts... i wonder?
So little thought put into something so very important.

Since: Oct 12

United States

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#174
Oct 28, 2012
 
What a dominant is:
Dominance is guiding another. To feel emotions imagined, joys never before thought possible and affection without measure.

Submission is a gift that must be earned, through passion and compassion:
it can be given, but never taken.

Helping your partner to let go completely. Accepting only my very best. The energy of the moment is everything.

To make love to me with a single caress.
To feel my heart beat from across the room. To know my thoughts by looking in my eyes.....
I will settle for nothing less and neither should you.

“Play with your food”

Since: Mar 12

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#175
Oct 30, 2012
 
shygrlcat wrote:
What a dominant is:
Dominance is guiding another. To feel emotions imagined, joys never before thought possible and affection without measure.
Submission is a gift that must be earned, through passion and compassion:
it can be given, but never taken.
Helping your partner to let go completely. Accepting only my very best. The energy of the moment is everything.
To make love to me with a single caress.
To feel my heart beat from across the room. To know my thoughts by looking in my eyes.....
I will settle for nothing less and neither should you.
Beautifully put. Dominance is not easy... but every good Dom wants his sub(s) to feel this way. The guys who come on Topix with bluster and false bravado, who want an animated sex toy. Only for a slave, who think Dominance is about testosterone... these men are clueless. How do you read something like this and still act like a moron?

Anyway, I don't want to get up on a soapbox, but...
Join Free
Jam

Nashua, NH

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#177
Oct 30, 2012
 
[QUOTE who="black Teen advice ;)"]I love to please guys bc it gets me off and the thought of a guys especially a white guy, pinning me to the bed sets my body on fire haha[/QUOTE] hey how old r u and have skype?
Kevin

Smithfield, RI

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#178
Oct 31, 2012
 
Peggy Suc wrote:
I love dominant/submissive sex. Only catch is I am the dominant one. Submissive is not in my nature. Only once did I meet my match, and I submitted to him completely, humiliated myself, let him use me however he wished. The bastard! But I am the bitch and I want to make the rules. Never again!
You can abuse me Peggy
Trapper

Montréal, Canada

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#179
Nov 1, 2012
 

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I the master of my sub and looking for ideas for a fmf night with her. Please send me your thoughts.
Olivia

United States

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#180
Nov 14, 2012
 
This sounds to me to be the scariest, sexiest, and most honest forms of sex. I wonder if I'm a Dom or sub. Both roles excite me.

Since: May 12

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#181
Nov 22, 2012
 
Olivia wrote:
This sounds to me to be the scariest, sexiest, and most honest forms of sex. I wonder if I'm a Dom or sub. Both roles excite me.
Suggest you find a person/s with experience RW who will let you try both roles. You will soon discover which (if any) fits you best.(Possible you are a "switch" as I am ~ switch between either role as both/neither)
GS Dom1863

Redding, CA

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#182
Nov 27, 2012
 

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I am a newly discovered Dominant in a relationship with a newly discovered submissive (both within the last few months). We are both successful, have fairly large work and home responsibilities. We fell into these roles very naturally, but slowly. We were a little tentative about our changing bedroom roles. We have a great relationship, so, about 2 months ago, we had an open discussion. We have progressed so much since then. I am very respectful, but...she is mine, and she likes it that way. I use cuffs, restraints, blindfolds, and a few other items, sometimes, nothing but my voice. I have discovered that this is not about sex or abuse, but about love, trust, control and the roles that are natural to us. We have very recently taken it out of the bedroom, we were in a restaurant about a week ago, I told her to go into the bathroom and take her panties off (By tone, she knows when it is not an option) and bring them to me. We were at a place where there were floor length tablecloths, so, we could be fairly well hidden from anyone else. During dinner, I had her pull up her skirt and rub her clit and pussy so I could watch. This was so hot for both of us, we barely made it home! However, after getting home, she had to wait; I denied her orgasm for about an hour after we got home. We did play, but after the long wait, it was a very intense orgasm. This is very new to us, is our behavior normal in this realm, or are we the odd ones?
We role play as well, cop and bad girl, Dean of Students and the wayward student, etc. I also use a whip, we both enjoy it. We did practice before hand, testing how hard was ok and not ok.
Here is the strange thing, I am definitely the Dom and she is clearly the sub, no desire to change roles. However, my respect for her has grown tremendously. The pure and complete trust she places in me is amazing. She tells me that she has a huge amount of respect for me as well for being strong, stern, but also loving and protective of her. These were unexpected benefits to this change in our relationship.
As stated earlier, due to our newness to this, I am looking for ideas, specific roles, or other avenues to explore. Any suggestions?

Since: Sep 12

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#183
Nov 28, 2012
 

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GS Dom1863 wrote:
I am a newly discovered Dominant in a relationship with a newly discovered submissive (both within the last few months). We are both successful, have fairly large work and home responsibilities. We fell into these roles very naturally, but slowly. We were a little tentative about our changing bedroom roles. We have a great relationship, so, about 2 months ago, we had an open discussion. We have progressed so much since then. I am very respectful, but...she is mine, and she likes it that way. I use cuffs, restraints, blindfolds, and a few other items, sometimes, nothing but my voice. I have discovered that this is not about sex or abuse, but about love, trust, control and the roles that are natural to us. We have very recently taken it out of the bedroom, we were in a restaurant about a week ago, I told her to go into the bathroom and take her panties off (By tone, she knows when it is not an option) and bring them to me. We were at a place where there were floor length tablecloths, so, we could be fairly well hidden from anyone else. During dinner, I had her pull up her skirt and rub her clit and pussy so I could watch. This was so hot for both of us, we barely made it home! However, after getting home, she had to wait; I denied her orgasm for about an hour after we got home. We did play, but after the long wait, it was a very intense orgasm. This is very new to us, is our behavior normal in this realm, or are we the odd ones?
We role play as well, cop and bad girl, Dean of Students and the wayward student, etc. I also use a whip, we both enjoy it. We did practice before hand, testing how hard was ok and not ok.
Here is the strange thing, I am definitely the Dom and she is clearly the sub, no desire to change roles. However, my respect for her has grown tremendously. The pure and complete trust she places in me is amazing. She tells me that she has a huge amount of respect for me as well for being strong, stern, but also loving and protective of her. These were unexpected benefits to this change in our relationship.
As stated earlier, due to our newness to this, I am looking for ideas, specific roles, or other avenues to explore. Any suggestions?
A very good post, and a refreshing change from what is usually written on this forum.

And YES, you are on the right track. Respect, trust and honesty are the most important elements for these relationships and form a solid foundation for you to continue on your journey. A submissive woman must always feel secure in order for her to give you this power over her.

Many people in this lifestyle will not post here on the open forum to answer your questions though I will suggest several books that are consistently recommended for people looking into or discovering this lifestyle. All can be found and ordered on Amazon.

For Dominants:
The Loving Dominant by John Warren and Libby Warren
Devil in the Details by LT Morrison – 3 volumes
Different Loving: A Complete Exploration of the World of Sexual Dominance and Submission by William Brame
Protocols – A Variety of Views: A Power Exchange Resource Book by Robert Rubel

You also may find this book interesting…
S&M 101 by Jay Wiseman

For Her:
Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns by Philip Miller and Molley Devon

Something for you both:
Living M/s; A Book for Masters, slaves and Their Relationships by Dan Williams

I suggest you make an account here so others will respond to your inquiries though Private Message.

Good luck and have fun.

“Play with your food”

Since: Mar 12

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#185
Nov 28, 2012
 

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Welcome back Dorei...

Since: Nov 12

Redding, CA

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#186
Nov 28, 2012
 

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Thank you Dorei!
I will read the reviews and order a few of these books. We are both very excited and enthusiastic about this new change in our relationship. We are both researching together and separately. It is very entertaining when we both have discoveries (because we are so new, is almost a constant!) and we sit down and talk about our ideas, thoughts and plans.
We have always had a very active and fulfilling sex life, but this has really added a huge spark. As I am sure you would suspect, this has had a great impact on our relationship as a whole. We have always communicated very well, but…….. this is a new depth of communication, it makes everything else even easier to talk about. There are no limits or boundaries as to what we can talk about. We are even closer than we were before.
I am very interested in ideas, thoughts on how to progress, possible ideas that we have not yet thought about, possible pitfalls to either avoid or at least be aware of.
I do believe that we are a great couple for this lifestyle. We have great communication, trust, and we kind of just fell into our roles. It is very natural for us, now we get the joy of learning!

By the way, I did creat that account! Thanks again!
lou

Vernon, Canada

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#188
Dec 24, 2012
 

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Jam wrote:
<quoted text> hey how old r u and have skype?
I'm 19 male we should hooke up I would love to be dominated
isabella

Milpitas, CA

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#189
Dec 26, 2012
 

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Hi,
Yes, I don't know you but I already like you!'
Can you put those two simple words "yes sir" in a literal way on my skin too?
You are the master i would love to be with..
Happy fun D/s 2013! not discipline, not fun =)
isabella

Milpitas, CA

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#190
Dec 26, 2012
 

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<i will teach you the meaning of 2 simple words "yes sir" and all your cravings will be satisfied>
Hi Michael,
I don't know you but I already like you!
I would love to have a Master that can put those two words in a literal way in my skin too.. freaking me and controlling me even at distance. That is a powerful Master! I am in D/s; not S/M at all.
Have a fun crazy D/s 2013! not discipline, not fun =)

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