Should an adult coach shower naked wi...

Since: May 09

Location hidden

#41 Aug 2, 2009
Quit coaching sports.
Rob

Paterson, NJ

#42 Aug 2, 2009
Hey Coach...ask the boy's parents and see if they agree with you. You'll probably end up with a hockey stick up your a-hole!

Quit coaching before someone's father has to beat the crap out of you.
Coach

United States

#43 Aug 2, 2009
OK I don't people fully understand sports today and I probably hurt myself by making a provacotive title and not giving ALL the info in the OP.

First, youre right, in the past athletes didn't shower with their coaches. But they do now. I know. I saw so just a few days ago! Roughly 45 athletes and 9 coaches per dorm floor (6 floors) trying to shower between 6:30-7:30 am and 10-11pm. Only 6 shower heads. You do the math! Yes there were OTHER coaches showering too! Athletes finished games at 9:30 and had lights out at 11. Coaches finished games at 9:30 and had coaches social at 11. You kinda HAD to shower! In the morning I tried to get up before the athletes' mad dash for showers at 6:30 for 7:00 breakfast. Three of five days I tried to get shower in by 6am. Once I was so tired by hectic schedule I slept thru alarm. Once I got solo shower in. Once even at that time, two kids were showering!

This past year once we had 25 minutes to get the team bus on the road and 25 athletes and one coach to shower. It was a long hot day of running and a 5 hour bus ride back home. I was running around the course around 20 times (it was flighted running, coaches often run more than runners on race day, getting splits, etc. for EVERY race!!!). I simply was NOT going to get on that hot bus sticky and smelling like dirty socks and rotten eggs!!

Im the past, sports was simple. A light practice and 20 games or 10 races per year. Now it's summer camps, summer tourneys, summer retreats, open gyms, practices/running every day.

As far as suggestions to not ever invite athletes to my house. Team bonding and social activities is one of the top reasons athletes turn out for sports! It actually translates to wins. EVERY other coach does it in my school as well as EVERY opponent coach in my league. My predecessor did it. My coach did it for us 20 YEARS AGO! You just need to have a 2nd coach there and invite every athlete.

In retrospect my questions would have been this:

1. Who would choose to shower naked and who would opt to smell ridiculously bad?

2. Who here IF they owned a hot tub AND they on a weekly basis verbally recommended hot tubbing, icing, swimming as much as possible because hot tubbing is PROVEN to increase muscle recovery and performance would
A. let athletes wear what they wanted into hot tub and let athletes and parents worry about being a slut or scandulous or provocative
B. But restrictions on what you can wear like one pieces only or only T's and shorts
C. Not let them hot tub with witness all over the place including adults even though I highly reccomend hot tubbing for performance
Coach

United States

#44 Aug 2, 2009
Rob wrote:
Hey Coach...ask the boy's parents and see if they agree with you. You'll probably end up with a hockey stick up your a-hole!
Quit coaching before someone's father has to beat the crap out of you.
Why? These are the same parents that had their PE teachers STARE at them while showering and wouldn't give them a towel until they were satisfied with how clean they are.

A am just showering with them for 3 minutes tops. Remember 90% of the time it's individual showers. So you are only undressed together for 5 seconds before shower and 20 seconds after.
Waterboy

Green Bay, WI

#45 Aug 2, 2009
Coach wrote:
<quoted text>
Why? These are the same parents that had their PE teachers STARE at them while showering and wouldn't give them a towel until they were satisfied with how clean they are.
A am just showering with them for 3 minutes tops. Remember 90% of the time it's individual showers. So you are only undressed together for 5 seconds before shower and 20 seconds after.
yah, your Bi, admit it. Forget the towel man, and keep your clothes on.
Old n Rich

United States

#46 Aug 2, 2009
Back in the 40's and 50's, everyone swimming at the YMCA pool was required to swim naked. Of course the YMCA was exclusively men and boys. So, kids in those days grew up around nudity and it was no big deal. I never knew why they had the nudity rule. Did we have homosexual "Y" managers in those days?

“Protestant, Gay, Libertarian”

Since: Apr 08

Long Island, NY

#47 Aug 2, 2009
Let me give you an analogy.

When I was on AOL, I would often talk to gay teens. Always non-sexual talk, but oftentimes about growing up gay, gay issues and things like that. I'm a nice guy. Sometimes a gay teen I was chatting with on aol would ask to visit. I ALWAYS said NO. Why ? Because I don't want there to even be the slightest basis for an accusation.

There was a teen who lived across the street from me. He would sometimes stop by to chat and socialize. I told him that I liked chatting with him and socializing but we could only do that in the street and that he was never allowed on my property. Why ? because openly gay and I do not want to present the slightest opportunity for a false accusation of any kind.

I think you're opening yourself up to a world of trouble and stand a chance of false accusations being made against you by needlessly showering with people under the age of 18 years old.

My advice is DON'T DO IT. It's not worth the hassle.

I've never had a false accusation made against me regarding anything remotely sexual and it will never happen, because I don't allow the slightest opportunity for that to happen.
Coach

United States

#48 Aug 2, 2009
Waterboy wrote:
<quoted text>
yah, your Bi, admit it. Forget the towel man, and keep your clothes on.
You never add anything to discussion. All you do is your agenda. Saying everyone is Bi.
Join Free

“Protestant, Gay, Libertarian”

Since: Apr 08

Long Island, NY

#49 Aug 2, 2009
btw, I've had sex with guys I met online and I always made sure they were over 18 before meeting them. ALL were nice guys, and there was even a guy who coincidentally lived in Patchogue with me who was one of the nicest guys I ever met. We go together fairly often and I even considered having a relationship with him, but decided against it.

But they were all over 18 years old.

Since: May 09

Location hidden

#50 Aug 2, 2009
I have a friend who is a Boyscout leader and he says that they are not allowed to be alone with any of the boys. They have a rule that there always has to be two leaders and they have to be together whenever a boy is present.

Perhaps that is your fix. Make sure you always have another coach or at least another adult present when you shower.

As far as hot tubs go. Boys testicals are outside the body so that they can stay cool. The testicals need to stay at an average of 72*F. Too much heat kills sperm cells and can lead to testical cancer. The high risk age for testical cancer is from 14 to 22. When testicals get too cold they take care of themselves by retracting closer and sometimes even inside the body.(Shrinkage) Boys should not be in hot tubs or even saunas. Really a boy shouldn't even take hot baths. Showers are ok because it isn't constant heat. If muscles need heat then hot towels on the area is your best and safest option. So really there is no logical reason you should find yourself in a hot tub with a boy.

Your other option is to get permission slips from the parents allowing them and you to be in the same space alone. Just my advice.
Waterboy

Green Bay, WI

#51 Aug 2, 2009
Coach wrote:
<quoted text>
You never add anything to discussion. All you do is your agenda. Saying everyone is Bi.
this is my last comment.

I don't care what your sexual preference is. All I care about is that you maintain your job. I think you should have a sole searching moment of time, and just think about the situation, coach.

You sound like a good guy, keep it that way. Good luck and bye.
Rob

Paterson, NJ

#52 Aug 2, 2009
Again Coach...if it's no big deal, give it a try and see how it works out for you. I think it is a HUGHE deal and so will many of the parents, regardless of what they may have experienced. As a matter of fact, parents that did experience something when they were younger will be more sensitized to it and will be the first to call the authorities.

So, is it worth it?

If you're not getting a sexual thrill from it, well, shower later and avoid the problems. If you are getting a sexual thrill out of it, well, then you should expect parents and the authorities to come looking for you and, you should expect a good old fashion beat down.

If it were my son, I wouldn't rest until you were an ex-coach and if you were looking at my kid that way, you'd have a major problem on your hands. Most fathers will feel the same way.

So, just cut the crap and save yourself some problems.
Rob

Paterson, NJ

#53 Aug 2, 2009
LetNatureHpn wrote:
I have a friend who is a Boyscout leader and he says that they are not allowed to be alone with any of the boys. They have a rule that there always has to be two leaders and they have to be together whenever a boy is present.
Perhaps that is your fix. Make sure you always have another coach or at least another adult present when you shower.
As far as hot tubs go. Boys testicals are outside the body so that they can stay cool. The testicals need to stay at an average of 72*F. Too much heat kills sperm cells and can lead to testical cancer. The high risk age for testical cancer is from 14 to 22. When testicals get too cold they take care of themselves by retracting closer and sometimes even inside the body.(Shrinkage) Boys should not be in hot tubs or even saunas. Really a boy shouldn't even take hot baths. Showers are ok because it isn't constant heat. If muscles need heat then hot towels on the area is your best and safest option. So really there is no logical reason you should find yourself in a hot tub with a boy.
Your other option is to get permission slips from the parents allowing them and you to be in the same space alone. Just my advice.
Permission slips? Sorry to tell you this but if there is anything inappropriate going on, permission slips mean nothing, Parents can not authorize the abuse of another being, including their kid. In the US, the adult is on the hook for anything that he does (or appears to have done).

My advise...don't do it. You have no business hanging around with naked underaged people..athletes or bot, boys or girls...it doesn't matter. Don't do it.

“Protestant, Gay, Libertarian”

Since: Apr 08

Long Island, NY

#54 Aug 2, 2009
Rob wrote:
<quoted text>
Permission slips? Sorry to tell you this but if there is anything inappropriate going on, permission slips mean nothing, Parents can not authorize the abuse of another being, including their kid. In the US, the adult is on the hook for anything that he does (or appears to have done).
My advise...don't do it. You have no business hanging around with naked underaged people..athletes or bot, boys or girls...it doesn't matter. Don't do it.
I agree. If we read about you in the newspapers, we're all going to say: "WE TOLD YOU SO !", and you'll have nobody to blame but yourself.

“Protestant, Gay, Libertarian”

Since: Apr 08

Long Island, NY

#55 Aug 2, 2009
LetNatureHpn wrote:
I have a friend who is a Boyscout leader and he says that they are not allowed to be alone with any of the boys. They have a rule that there always has to be two leaders and they have to be together whenever a boy is present.
Perhaps that is your fix. Make sure you always have another coach or at least another adult present when you shower.
As far as hot tubs go. Boys testicals are outside the body so that they can stay cool. The testicals need to stay at an average of 72*F. Too much heat kills sperm cells and can lead to testical cancer. The high risk age for testical cancer is from 14 to 22. When testicals get too cold they take care of themselves by retracting closer and sometimes even inside the body.(Shrinkage) Boys should not be in hot tubs or even saunas. Really a boy shouldn't even take hot baths. Showers are ok because it isn't constant heat. If muscles need heat then hot towels on the area is your best and safest option. So really there is no logical reason you should find yourself in a hot tub with a boy.
Your other option is to get permission slips from the parents allowing them and you to be in the same space alone. Just my advice.
I never heard that a hot tub can lead to testicular cancer. Do you have a source ?

Thank you.
Coach

United States

#56 Aug 2, 2009
Waterboy wrote:
<quoted text>
this is my last comment.
I don't care what your sexual preference is. All I care about is that you maintain your job. I think you should have a sole searching moment of time, and just think about the situation, coach.
You sound like a good guy, keep it that way. Good luck and bye.
Thanks for the kind words and thanks for your advice.
Player

Chicago, IL

#57 Aug 17, 2012
I was in a youth baseball program at our local park some 20 years ago. Our first and third base coaches were the older brothers of 2 of my best friends on the team. Because some of the boys never seemed to shower our head coach insisted that the base coaches make sure that we were clean before getting back on the bus. We team members never had second thoughts about showering with these guys. After all they had come up through the same program and they both going to college.
There was never any hint of any boy being molested.
intocable

United States

#58 Aug 17, 2012
one correct ansr to that question: NO
Erich

Komae, Japan

#59 Feb 6, 2013
This is all just another American paranoia thing. I'm a German sports teacher, and here it is absolutely normal that teachers shower with the students of the same sex, at the end of the class before lunch and the last class of the day. It is simply not an issue.
There are surely some boys (and some teachers) who are gay, and will enjoy looking - so what? No skin off anybody's nose. If someone wants to look, let them. I have never heard of a single incident, either at my school or at others, where 'enjoying the eye-candy' has led on to anything else.
From a European perspective, the American hang-ups about nakedness make them look like a nation of mentally unbalanced 10 year-olds.

“16 is NOT my age. ”

Since: Mar 11

KC MO

#60 Feb 7, 2013
Coach wrote:
I just started coaching a year ago. I coach high school boys basketball, coed cross country and track and field as well as select boys and girls basketball teams. I always try to not give ammunition to parents of athletes that i don't give playing time too. Not give them anything they can get mad at me for or sue me for that I did or didn't do. So I tend to think's prudent that I ATTEMPT to shower before or after the boys on my team do. But on occasion they walk in on me naked in the shower or i walk in on them.
They are 14-18 year olds. I am 33 years old. We all have the same equipment. I don't have anything that they don't. OK so I'm bigger than some of them and some of the young boys are very small and are probably interested in looking at me and the older boys. But do you think a boy and a man (and a player and a coach) should or shouldn't shower together?
Also the boys and the girls know I have a hot tub at my house since they have been over for team dinners. Recently they have been using it with me. Again, should I see my girl players in skimpy bikinis?
PS - Obviously nothing sexual is going on.
No, it's inappropriate.

Tell me when this thread is updated:

Subscribe Now Add to my Tracker

Add your comments below

Characters left: 4000

Please note by submitting this form you acknowledge that you have read the Terms of Service and the comment you are posting is in compliance with such terms. Be polite. Inappropriate posts may be removed by the moderator. Send us your feedback.

Human Sexuality Discussions

Title Updated Last By Comments
Horny girl, looking for snapchat buddy ;) (Jun '13) 2 min Allornothing666 80
Cucumber or banana? 2 min Round the Clock 46
Gay/bi K....k (Nov '13) 3 min vitalyvulpes 387,395
older man please 3 min citnn 7
What penis size do women really prefer? (Jun '09) 3 min 10inch D - Horny 3,416
gay snapchat!!! (Dec '12) 3 min gayrile 806,711
Ever upskirt a preacher's wife or pastor's wife? (Dec '13) 3 min SDMale 138
Bi/Gay Skype sex (Oct '11) 3 min Fit men 787,565
Dirty ki...k 4 min peterhaha42 109,942
Girls nude snapchat usernames (Apr '14) 5 min sneipen 108,938
More from around the web