Why do women stop having sex after ma...

Since: Mar 08

Ichikawa, Japan

#573 Mar 21, 2008
giving up is always the easy way out, but it is kind of sad.
Joan W

AOL

#574 Mar 22, 2008
inkling wrote:
Why do women stop having sex after marriage?
Maybe it's a universal ploy... Cry "Women unite"!
The smarter ones have to help the stupider ones earn a living. Just ask EX governor Spitball.
http://www.wgrz.com/news/news_article.aspx...
The gov. probably hadn't had sex with his wife for decades and was sex starved. Look at the Clintons. He's had maybe 40 girfriends since they've been married. Politicans have to stay married to get elected and move up in politics. Many of their marriages have been long since over with but they cannot divorce. Of course, they drag the wife out there with them when they get busted. They've been separated and out of love for decades anyway and making phony political apearances the entire time, it's just another phony political appearance.
no worries

Ojai, CA

#575 Apr 1, 2008
No worries..just find another girlfriend or mistress.
no worries

Ojai, CA

#576 Apr 1, 2008
Just pretend that you care..give her a massage..write a really great love letter...help her around the house..then just go tell her you're going out golfing or another hobby and find a younger hotter female that enjoys sex.

She gets the emotional stuff without the sex she didn't want in the first place.
Married n a kid

Helsinki, Finland

#577 Apr 2, 2008
Well.. I´m a married woman and I have two kids (little one 6 months) n here´s the deal. When you find your future husband/wife you do your BEST in absolutely everything!..to have and keep the one you want. This goes to both of you, man n woman. When you finally get married (mostly you´ve been together sometime already) you kind of can relax from all that "hard work", all that trying but your love to your partner is still strong.. also this one goes for both of you!(N when you get your kids- you can forget about your life, private time, sexlife with your hubby/wife at least for next 6 months.) So, I´m wondering here.. how come it´s just the wife who stops wanting... Men, did you ever stop to think, that who would just want the sex because of partners want and desire..?!?.. Must be because all that hard work from the male stopped right there at the relaxing point- not enough romance, all the sweet talk is gone..etc etc So if you can say that woman stops wanting after marriage, then please go little bit to yourself too.. as much as you think your wife don´t want you--as much you stoped the romance,flirt n sweetness to her. Do your part and you´ll be paid as well! Don´t just think that your wife simply got tired and don´t think the reason is her ring and because she got the cake to eat! And people, don´t take your marriage that easy/simple and find another girlfriend/mistress.. If you do, you were not meant to be blessed with a good,loving wife/husband anyways!
Best luck to everybody!
MONICA

Milan, Italy

#578 Apr 3, 2008
I AM NOT A MARRIED WOMAN BUT WHAT I HAVE SEE ON THIS EARTH IS SEX TAKE 99% ,AND ANY BODY WHO'S GET MARRY AND DO NOT MAKE SEX, IT MEANS HE/SHE IS IS NOT PART OF THIS WORD.NOW SMALL GIRLS 12,15 GOING AER HAVING SEX AND IT'S VERY BAD THING AND EVEN THESE GIRLS AND BOYS DOING PORNO SEXSUAL IT A BAD THING BUT EVERY DAY THEY DO SEX TO GET MONEY.
Joefuckcy

Las Vegas, NV

#579 Apr 7, 2008
Women should should give men good sex.
Reason if she don't watchout he will
sex another women .
The other women dont get good fuck by they men
so they need sex from other men.
This women enjoy being sex by other men and make them very happy.
Either men or women need sex and this will make
they marriage last long.
just-dont-want-t o

United States

#580 May 5, 2008
ya know, I've been married a long time and I've always done my part. I give my wife a back rub on most nights and we go out to dinner more than she cooks. I was always tender and romantic, flowers, cards, etc. I always initiated sex and she always was receptive. Ok girls, here's the rub. It goes against every guys grain to do this all the time. It's hard work. I quit doing it! If she want to have sex then she can turn me on. Walk in with her nipples out and crotchless panties, bend over and beg to be taken. Guys want a porn star sometimes, it has to go both ways, stay balanced, out of balance = lousy sex. pull em down, paddle her bottom and tell her what to do, she will love it. At least sometimes. Other times it's chocolate romantic music and candles. It can't be romance all the time. Guys will resent it and women will get tired of it.
Stu

Catasauqua, PA

#581 May 7, 2008
"I'm sorry you aren't happy being married. It's not like that for everyone. Some men want a stable relationship. They want the companionship and camaraderie of being married. They like the sureness of knowing who you'll wake up with and who you'll go to bed with. Some don't like that."

Uh, no. The only men who don't get married for easy access to sex are men who want/need a green card or who want to improve their shaky financial situation. That's it.
Stu

United States

#583 May 13, 2008
"In your first few months or years, depending on your plan, it's all about making babies. Sex is still fun and important, because you want a child, and you spend lots of time trying to create one.(For some it becomes a chore."

Uh, no Tamara24. Sex IS NOT ABOUT having kids for the majority of men. We like sex. Please don't make gross generalizations like that.
Maybe they did not stop

Colorado Springs, CO

#584 May 13, 2008
Why do women stop having sex after marriage?

Hummm.
That's a bad question.

Think about it.

Thinking...

Thinking...

Thinking...

Thinking...

Are you ready?

Maybe they have have stopped only with you.
Maybe they are active elsewhere.
Black is Beautiful

Farmville, NC

#585 May 13, 2008
I'm married and my husband and I are very kinky when it comes to sex, so to say that women stop having sex after marriage is just not true for me. And the ones who do stop probably do it b/c of stress, be it from running behind kids all day, cooking, cleaning, career, etc. I have one kid and one on the way, so I completely understand if women aren't as in the mood as they use to be, but ladies you have to find a way to keep your husband satisfied and interested if you want to keep him. Some men are very patient and will wait others will not.
armlyon

Albuquerque, NM

#586 May 25, 2008
Well I don't know with me, my wife used to be a nympho before me, more so i think with different men rather than the same one. well we have been married for 5 months and have not had sex in three months, I do all those things, rub her all the time, kiss her and cuddle i am very passionate with, there is even nights i pleasure her just to have her roll over and go to sleep. I am not sure if it is me or, Do i just not turn her on? I thought about enlargment or something, when we used to do it it was great, she would finish before me and then i would, now it is nothing really do i just not attract her anymore, is it becuase i am the same guy and not anohter man? which should i fear she has another man, or will soon?
yrrtybat

Coatesville, PA

#587 Jun 9, 2008
Well, I'm not married yet but supposedly I'm about to be sentenced to a very drab and boring life. We've been engaged for six months and my fiancee and I haven't had sex for over two years.

At first, I thought there was a real problem that needed nurturing and care. Now I know it's all excuses and lies.

Some women have talked about how at first in a relationship the hormones take over and you just want each other all the time. Of course this is true. The sad thing is I love my fiancee very much and I thought I was very lucky to have someone who had a perfect personality for me and to top all off is very attractive.

However, about two years ago, she stopped suddenly wanting to have sex. She claimed that the last time together was painful for her. Okay, that sucks, and I was like okay what do we do? She refused to talk to any doctor about it, saying it was too embarassing.

After a year, she mentioned it in passing in her yearly exam and was told well you need to try some cream and refrain for a few weeks (not a problem there). Nothing changed in her desire. Another year has gone by and she has no interest in sex, kissing, being near each other, or anything at all. If I try to initiate anything, I get yelled at, so I stopped. I was told for months she was "working on it". However, nothing changes.

I tried everything. I offered counseling, since by now she's built such a wall between us that I'm sure there's no way to break it down now. I offered to let her tell me when she's ready, but I might as well expect that to be never. It is a forbidden subject. If I say anything even close to the subject, she withdraws and starts yelling.

If I say something like, "I would like to work on getting the intimacy back," it gets thrown back at me. "We aren't intimate? Holding hands isn't intimate? I guess that's all that's important to you."

Umm... after two years of being patient, that's all that's important? That's a fine and abusive tack to take.

I'm pretty sick of it and strongly considering breaking off the engagement at this point. There's no reason to think there will ever be any sex ever. I certainly am not interested in having a one night stand with her on our wedding night. Being a women she'd probably be up for it to have her nice wedding night and then any five year moratorium. I'm not having a one night stand with her to have a child, which will certainly be the end of any possible sex life.

It means nothing to her now and it'll mean nothing to her forever. It's hard to leave someone you love so much but I'm beginning to realize this is just abusive.
GDP

Sharpsburg, GA

#588 Jun 10, 2008
Tamara24 wrote:
<quoted text>Does he seem to mind that your holding out on him?
Dont sound like he minds at all. And from the sound of her attitude, it might be him thats happy for the sexless marriage. Of course he might be coming home a little late now and then!
GDP

Sharpsburg, GA

#589 Jun 10, 2008
yrrtybat wrote:
Well, I'm not married yet but supposedly I'm about to be sentenced to a very drab and boring life. We've been engaged for six months and my fiancee and I haven't had sex for over two years.
At first, I thought there was a real problem that needed nurturing and care. Now I know it's all excuses and lies.
Some women have talked about how at first in a relationship the hormones take over and you just want each other all the time. Of course this is true. The sad thing is I love my fiancee very much and I thought I was very lucky to have someone who had a perfect personality for me and to top all off is very attractive.
However, about two years ago, she stopped suddenly wanting to have sex. She claimed that the last time together was painful for her. Okay, that sucks, and I was like okay what do we do? She refused to talk to any doctor about it, saying it was too embarassing.
After a year, she mentioned it in passing in her yearly exam and was told well you need to try some cream and refrain for a few weeks (not a problem there). Nothing changed in her desire. Another year has gone by and she has no interest in sex, kissing, being near each other, or anything at all. If I try to initiate anything, I get yelled at, so I stopped. I was told for months she was "working on it". However, nothing changes.
I tried everything. I offered counseling, since by now she's built such a wall between us that I'm sure there's no way to break it down now. I offered to let her tell me when she's ready, but I might as well expect that to be never. It is a forbidden subject. If I say anything even close to the subject, she withdraws and starts yelling.
If I say something like, "I would like to work on getting the intimacy back," it gets thrown back at me. "We aren't intimate? Holding hands isn't intimate? I guess that's all that's important to you."
Umm... after two years of being patient, that's all that's important? That's a fine and abusive tack to take.
I'm pretty sick of it and strongly considering breaking off the engagement at this point. There's no reason to think there will ever be any sex ever. I certainly am not interested in having a one night stand with her on our wedding night. Being a women she'd probably be up for it to have her nice wedding night and then any five year moratorium. I'm not having a one night stand with her to have a child, which will certainly be the end of any possible sex life.
It means nothing to her now and it'll mean nothing to her forever. It's hard to leave someone you love so much but I'm beginning to realize this is just abusive.
It sounds like she left you a while ago. For some, sex is just not that important in their relationship. But she may also be gay! Its happened before.Gov of New Jersey!
GDP

Sharpsburg, GA

#590 Jun 10, 2008
olderwife wrote:
Part 2
Maybe if a man would be more touching and affectionate by holding hands, cuddling etc. and not only when they want to have sex. Try being affectionate on a normal daily basis, the sex may increase. Make your wife feel that you want HER and not just SEX.
It seems that a man needs to do all the work just to have sex. Well you kind of do if you want to restore a healthy sexual relationship with your wife by educating your self on how different the two of you are is a start. Same sex marriages don't face these same issues as much, and any relationship no matter what sex takes a lot of work on both parts. Chances are your wife has tried to explain things to you but you did not understand and just took it as an excuse of some sort.
You can give up if it is too much for you, but I can almost guarantee that no matter what long term relationship you will be in, it will result the same until you can realize the differences between a man and a woman.
The best thing to do is communicate with your wife, try to understand them. We can't just have sex because YOU want to. There is a lot more to it. You should feel lucky if your woman feels that way about sex being something so special to her. Otherwise she would be going off and having sex with whoever whenever.
Sex is not just a desire to feel good to us. It is more of an intimate connection with the one that we love.
It is sad to read about people being negative about their spouses. When it is really is just a matter of understanding your differences.
I hope this may have helped anyone.
Most men do all that and then some. The question is, why do women change when it comes to sex? They loved it in the early years and now they dont. Oh I know, Already have their man and with the dis-advantages for the men in divorce its like I dare you to leave....so they just play around andd let the old bag dry up. Men shouldnt have to work so hard for something they barely had to work for years ago. Just my opinion.
The TRUTH

Phoenix, AZ

#591 Jun 10, 2008
Wow... all I see here are men complaining and women giving lame justifications or saying it isn't true.

Looks like we need another poll: "Why can't women answer this question Honestly?!?!?"

Since: Dec 07

United States

#592 Jun 18, 2008
MaryShouldHaveAborted wrote:
Because the husband has probably grown tired of his hag, and is probably balling some other chick instead.
You are an arshole. Ball yourself dupewod.
mike

Fairborn, OH

#595 Jun 23, 2008
truthfully married people have pretty lousy sex when compared to when they are dating or when they are newlyweds. Women will have great sex with men in order to keep them. Once they have that ring in their finger they don't need to put out (game theory models explain that very well).

1/3 of women can't come according to the Kinsey report and other studies. There are a lot of women that don't like sex or that do not feel sex is a priority. If a man has had a lot of good sex before marriage than they will be incredibly frustrated. I do not know what the answer is to this dilemma. I know that in the long run couples stay together because of their children. Sex is not very frequent and the quality tends to be pretty lousy when compared to frequent and passionate intercourse during dating and the early part of a marriage.

If your work brings you joy and fulfillment. You will channel your sexual energy towards hobbies and towards work. If single men knew how lousy sex was and is in marriage many of them would probably not get married.

In the long run marriage is really about having offspring and giving them a safe and stable environment to grow. The sex is a way of nature tricking men into getting married.

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