Mother in Law sexual desire

[Carpe Diem]

Tangerine Man wrote:

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...Well I hope you reassured here (and it shouldn't have been for the first time!)- that EVERYTHING that passes between you and her will ALWAYS be kept in the strictest confidence - to everyone, and particularly her daughter and husband. She obviously trusts you regarding the latter because she wouldn't have revealed about her marital problems as she sounds to be a sensible, if a bit feisty woman - but its good to endorse this.I'm wondering what transpired between you two during that hotel visit as you didn't comment on this following your post of 10 Aug (#3632)as this would have been the ideal opportunity to have had a really good, deep conversation with her as well as to express your own felings about her. However, from your subsequent post (#3656)things seem to have turned rather 'frosty', and I'm wondering if she was perhaps a bit 'disenchanted' that you hadn't taken the opportunity to do this?(It could of course just be a mood thing caused by her sexual frustration and/or just an 'off' day - we all have 'em!)
As for her response to your anecdote about your 'wet dream'...perhaps she was just being tactful -'time and place for everything'etc? ie bad timing on your part, and hadn't 'picked up' her need for consolation (although it would appear you 'redeemed' yourself with that bit of massage - good move!)The way I'm reading this at the moment is that she 'sees'you as an 'intimate friend'rather than a potential lover (her comment about 'thinking about seeking some affection elsewhere' was very revealing - and maybe you should have asked her to elaborate on this but the moment has passed now.)Do try to 'pick up' such comments in future though, and use responses such as 'what to you mean about that?'/'Do you want to tell me more'?etc.You also need to be reminding her that you are always there to help her relieve her frustration to get things out of her system. But on the whole, I think you're doing well here - Keep it cool, man! Good luck.

Thanks Tangerine Man for the detailed analysis and cross references to the prior posts. I was having some similar thoughts. Just because nunyasc's mother in law is unavailable on one occasion doesn't mean that is anything more than her feelings on that particular day. I assume nunyasc's wife is available to him as a sexual partner... on some days. Other days she might not be in the mood. So what. I also agree with you that he should be the one who is always there for her, and that if he continues down that line, things may fall into place.

[Claude]

I love my mother in law Patty Conrad of Independence Missouri !
I masterbate thinking about Patty's sweet ass at least 3 times a day. I want to eat Patty's vagina every day for the rest of my life !

[Tangerine Man]

Carpe Diem wrote:

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Thanks Tangerine Man for the detailed analysis and cross references to the prior posts. I was having some similar thoughts. Just because nunyasc's mother in law is unavailable on one occasion doesn't mean that is anything more than her feelings on that particular day. I assume nunyasc's wife is available to him as a sexual partner... on some days. Other days she might not be in the mood. So what. I also agree with you that he should be the one who is always there for her, and that if he continues down that line, things may fall into place.

The other possibility of course is that he's completely misread the situation, and that to her he's just a 'listening ear' as a member of the family she feels she can talk to about her frustration (hence her comments "This is just between us" etc)and similarly, her verbal reaction (or rather, non-reaction) when he recounted his erotic dream involving her - straight from the psychiatic's chair!There were certainly no sexual overtones about the hotel visit(ie just another 'family journey' as far as wifey and MIL was concerned)and my guess is that it was like any other 'normal' stopover during a long journey and hence no comments to date would tend to confirm this.I suspect that the marital situation between 'nunyasc' and his wife is not ideal as she has been conspicuous by her absence from his narration of events - which is always a clue. Similarly the FIL.......At the end of the day 'nunyasc' may be nothing more than a confused 'dreamer'within an unhappy marriage and a pair of 'post menstrual'in-laws.Hey Ho!

[Carpe Diem]

Tangerine Man wrote:

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The other possibility of course is that he's completely misread the situation, and that to her he's just a 'listening ear' as a member of the family she feels she can talk to about her frustration (hence her comments "This is just between us" etc)and similarly, her verbal reaction (or rather, non-reaction) when he recounted his erotic dream involving her - straight from the psychiatic's chair!There were certainly no sexual overtones about the hotel visit(ie just another 'family journey' as far as wifey and MIL was concerned)and my guess is that it was like any other 'normal' stopover during a long journey and hence no comments to date would tend to confirm this.I suspect that the marital situation between 'nunyasc' and his wife is not ideal as she has been conspicuous by her absence from his narration of events - which is always a clue. Similarly the FIL.......At the end of the day 'nunyasc' may be nothing more than a confused 'dreamer'within an unhappy marriage and a pair of 'post menstrual'in-laws.Hey Ho!

Could be. Maybe MIL just wants someone to vent to, and nunysac has a less than ideal marriage. Hey, nunysac, what say you? But on the other hand, MIL's failure to leap into his arms may be just the way she is. If I tell my own wife that I had a sexual dream about her, she would not leap into my arms either - she would probably just give me a response "from the psychiatrist's chair" and go about her business. So nunysac's lack of response may have just meant "not right now".

[most interesting]

Claude wrote:

I love my mother in law Patty Conrad of Independence Missouri !
I masterbate thinking about Patty's sweet ass at least 3 times a day. I want to eat Patty's vagina every day for the rest of my life !

do u want me to tell her for you, lets see a pic.

[mugzie]

This seems obvious, but perhaps it needs to be recognized that a MIL can't exactly come out and say,'please do me.' Nor can one develop 'one size fits all' answers for every situation.

That said, it may be helpful to develop strategic guidelines, things which could be done in principle to keep moving the agenda forward – until the event happens, or impassible boundaries are encountered.

1. On every reference of secrecy, respond immediately by affirming firmly that no matter what is shared between you stays between you.

2. When a MIL shares that her love life is non-existent, assume as the appropriate moment presents next time that you have permission to raise this topic delicately. Ex: I’ve thought about what you shared last time [show GENUINE empathy for her]; has there been any progress? Let her see that she can discuss this as casually as the weather, and that she will always get a sympathetic, affirming, validating ear. This must be SO hard; you have a right to so much better; as a woman, you have a right to feel like a woman, etc.

3. If she makes touches, ALWAYS let her decide when contact ends.

The more insights contributors bring, the more effective such a list will become.

Mugzie

[ajsk13]

I envy some of you

[TN Advice]

Well as an update, shes been here two days and not really speaking to me at all. In fairness, I am kind of annoyed at her quiet and find it hard to have conversation. I really think she is nervous/intimidated by me. She is probably so inexperienced sexually at this point and guilt ridden by being attracted to me that she has completely shut down. Its actually uncomfortable when my spouse ins't around or the kids are napping.

[OneHandintheHone yJar]

Been dating my (now wife) since high school. I was a teenager at the time that I started noticing her mom. She was in her mid 40's. Her mom is now almost 60. She's single and lives alone. Hasn't been with a man since her 40's (such a shame). She is still a very sexy woman. Big Round Butt. Soft smooth skin. Beautifully shaped thighs and adorably beautiful hands. Awesome boobs too. On top of that, she has a super sexy accent and is very goofy. She is self conscious about her midsection cause she's gained a little weight there, but I think she minds much more than I do.

The 3 of us hang out all the time and have for years. She really likes me as a son in law. She's always been sorta flirtatious with me, but it is never ever spoken of. Little glances. Smacks on the butt (mutual). One time she sat on my lap sideways while I was at the computer. Her daughter (my wife) walked out of the bathroom and saw that and didn't think nothin of it. Also, when I give her a hug, I always sorta bring my hands lower and feel her booty a little. She knows it and has never minded.

A few years back, she had been experiencing some discomfort in her lower back right above her butt.(for real, she has some sciatica pain). Then one day (still a few years ago), the most awesome thing happened. I went to her house to help her setup her new plasma tv. We were alone. She complained of some pain and I told her to lay down on the floor so I could rub it out for her. She laughed, but went on her stomach. I asked her where the pain was, and she seriously pointed right on her butt. So I started to massage her butt with my right hand and put my left hand right in the middle of her buttcrack (pants on) for support. After about a minute, she said thanks and sorta got up but put her butt real far back (like doggystyle stretch position) and made it very clear that she was comfortable and even happy to have me behind her with her head down and everything. I was just amazed out how cool this was. I continued rubbing her butt and had one hand between her legs and sorta kinda rubbed her pussy through the pants but really subtly. She then stood up and I smacked her butt and said "dang mama, nice booty!". She laughed and walked away and that was the end of it. Nothing like that has happened since and we have never spoken about it.

Fast forward to today. Now lately the last couple times, she kinda blocked my hand! ah! Here is what I gather. She got scared because she thinks I'm gonna ruin my relationship with her daughter. Since lately my MIL has been sorta weird and standoffish to me, should I just give it up and forget it? Or should I let her know that I think me being attracted to her actually makes me more attracted to her daughter and that it's really a good thing for everyone, even long term (that's true btw). My wife is hot.

In a conversation a while back, my wife asked me if I thought her mom was pretty. I said yes and then I said that I love her mom's butt and have fantasized about her. She said that's a good thing because that means I will be attracted to her for a long time. She also said "Well... is this going to have a negative impact on our relationship?" I told her no it won't. But she doesn't know that I fantasize about her mom ALL the time. My wife is very conservative and I think she would not be happy if she found out that her mom and I 'did' anything. The truth is I want to do every naughty thing you can imagine with her mom and I cannot stop wishing for it, though I've tried to over the years.

Here's what I wish would happen. I tell MIL that I have the hots for her and that I want a sexual but non-romantic relationship with her and to keep it just between the 2 of us. And that it's a good thing because that means I will have the hots for her daughter for a really long time. After all, my wife really did say that, so I wouldn't be lying. Maybe that might make her mom more comfortable with us foolin around all through her 60's and maybe even longer.

[Bruce48]

TN Advice wrote:

Well as an update, shes been here two days and not really speaking to me at all. In fairness, I am kind of annoyed at her quiet and find it hard to have conversation. I really think she is nervous/intimidated by me. She is probably so inexperienced sexually at this point and guilt ridden by being attracted to me that she has completely shut down. Its actually uncomfortable when my spouse ins't around or the kids are napping.

Sure sounds like she feels guilty about what happened, rather than exicted like you were. I suggest you tell her the next moment you are sure the two of you are alone that you are sorry that she is now feeling uncomfortable around you and you hope she can put that in the past and the two of you can go back to being good friends. In her current state of mind I see things only getting worse, and she might even try to ease her feelings by telling someone. You need to relieve her stress and calm her down.

[Tom]

Donna wrote:

I am a widow and my son-in-law told me he was attracted to me about 5 years after he married my daughter. My daughter talked all the time about how her husband was a pervert and wanted sex all the time, but she believed sex was just for procreation. Since I knew my daughter wasn't providing for her husband's needs. I allowed him to get a little drunk one night and I slept with him. The next morning, when he woke up beside me, we had sex again sober.
He has been married to my daughter for 23 years now, and about two or three times a month, he comes over to help me with things around the house and we take care of each others needs. My daughter has confided in me she knows he is having an affair, and is just happy he doesn't want sex with her. Other than sex, they have a great marriage, and I feel like I am helping make their marriage work, and getting to enjoy my own sexuality.

Donna,Thank You,
I am a 63 yr man in a sexless marriage and my 71 yr old widowed mother in law are sex partners, I love my wife but i do have needs and my mother in law is there for me and me for her,i think my wife knows but likes me to help her Mom arund the house, sex with her is physically and emotionally great and keeps us healthy without me seeking out a prostitute or engaging in unsafe sex or looking for another woman, It is only sex and comforting

[Tom]

Donna,I am 63 and having sex with my 71 yr old mother in law for the same reasons,it is good mentally and physically for all concerned. Thank you Donna , I understand and pillow talk about STUFF with my mother in law is great

[Expat]

Insane stuff. Didn't realize this was so common! Glad I found this forum!

[Expat]

Mil and I were left alone one night last May while wife was at her sisters, on the eve of her wedding. Mil had come to help with the kids and we were left alone after the kids were asleep. She had complained earlier about back pain so I offered to give her a massage. Well, at 50 she is 5'2", 110lbs. soaking wet, with firm b-cup breasts and a perfectly chiseled body. Needless to say I was definitely not against putting my hands on this woman's body and giving her a massage. As I started on her upper back and neck and began working my way down toward the lumbar area I naturally became aroused and decided to test the waters a little more. Slowly I worked my way down from her lumbar area to her upper buttocks, first with my thumbs, to see her reaction, then my hands. Incredible, I now had my hands on my wife's mothers ass and was squeezing and rubbing it! She is quite conservative in her demeanor and did not give any noticeable indication of being aroused and on the other hand, she didn't lift a finger to stop me at that point. She was wearing a plain cotton housedress or nightshirt, if that's what they're called, and it had worked it's way up to where I could see her pink panties covering her vaginal area. Didn't notice wetness or anything like that, and was nervous about testing the waters any further at this point because she wasn't giving any of the classic arousal signs. I realized I was in dangerous territory. I think we both knew it, and the ending of this event was brought on by my two-year old son who woke up crying to which she jumped up, pulling the housedress down and running to him. I waited for her return after she put him back to sleep, right where we left off, on the living room rug. When she came back twenty minutes later I said, "Now where we're we ...". To which I got the response that, she was going to bed and that she thought it was time for us to say good night.
This was only the beginning. We did finally end up in an affair. I will continue later and have some advice I think may be helpful to those who do want to go down this road.

[Carpe Diem]

Expat wrote:

At 50 she is 5'2", 110lbs. soaking wet, with firm b-cup breasts and a perfectly chiseled body....
I will continue later and have some advice I think may be helpful to those who do want to go down this road.

Welcome to the group. I look forward to reading the rest of your story.

[claude]

If I get the chance I am definately making love to my mother in law til she can't walk !

[yank]

I know what you mean

[yank]

, I know what u mean....my mother in law, Debbie, is my life... She is the most beautiful thing on earth, I have loved her from day one, she is such a woman, a really girly woman, and also having lots of boots and high heels, I wanted this woman anyway I can have her...my crush for her to this day is so extreme, I wear her dresses, I love wearing her soiled panties and , I've literally had intimate sex with her shoes, and I actually get so horny, when im alone during the day she at work, I get all dressed up in her clothes, I make sweet passionate love to her pretty shoes, and end up giving myself oral sex, omg I love her shiny heels, it makes me feel so close to her, and I'm actually thinking of crushing up ten xanax, slipping them to her, wait until she passes out, then, omg, ravage , i would slip her girly shoes on and bury my penis in her and my lips on hers.....

[Expat]

Carpe Diem wrote:

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Welcome to the group. I look forward to reading the rest of your story.

Thanks, Carpe Diem!

[Abhi]

I always fantasized about my mother inlaw and many a times role-played with my wife where she played to be her mom... it has become a norm and now it's difficult for both of us to reach orgasm until we play this game.
Last, when we visited her mom it was difficult to ignore looking at her without thinking about it.. and we both my wife & I knew had that look in our eyes.. we stayed overnight and to my surprise my wife flicked a used dirty panty of her mom from the laundry basket and brought it to bed with her.. we both sniffed and licked it and had the best sex ever.
My wife teases me a lot of times when talking over the phone with her mom by putting her on speaker phone and talk about private stuff... while stroking me off... without my mother in law knowing that i can listen to her...
We are quite open minded but I do not think my wife will be okay with me actually doing her mom... I really don't know what to do.. but I relieve myself a lot of times thinking about MIL.