BDSM Do you like it, or not? Why?

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“safe, sane, consensual...”

Since: Jul 08

perpetual arousal

#1 Jul 21, 2008
The discussions I've read so far have been fascinating. The many different opinions, insults, compliments - yet only a few have talked about BDSM.

(For those of you who do not know, BDSM stands for several things: bondage and discipline, domination and submission, sadism and masochism...you get the general idea)

“...............”

Since: Dec 07

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#2 Jul 21, 2008
Bongage and submission might be interesting but I don't think pain is a turn on. Not for me anyways.
I think that being completely dominated by the guy is hot though.

“safe, sane, consensual...”

Since: Jul 08

perpetual arousal

#3 Jul 21, 2008
P-S-S wrote:
Bongage and submission might be interesting but I don't think pain is a turn on. Not for me anyways.
I think that being completely dominated by the guy is hot though.
Some pain can be a turn on - not like the pain from a car accident, or falling down the stairs, but spanking and light whipping can be enjoyable! However, the person doing the whipping has to be familiar with the human body - there are places that could be permanently damaged if whipped hard - so the Dom has to be knowledgeable and there has to be ABSOLUTE trust, otherwise it's just frightening.
Mike

Phoenix, AZ

#5 Jul 22, 2008
frank d wrote:
I have been tied up before, hit in the face with a hard cock, being force-fed cock, and whipped from forehead to foot, titties pressed against my face. I have engaged in such with girls as well, with nearly all not minding that activity at all.
your wife beat the sh-it out of you boy, and your pis-sed off about it!cause your buddies know about it!

“Men should be submissive”

Since: Nov 07

Location hidden

#6 Jul 22, 2008
Yes, the alt lifestyle is the way to go. It is sex with imagination.

I enjoy submissive men. Even men who think they are strictly dominant love being a sub once in a while. Men who are younger than me are often quite comfortable in the submissive role. I think it frees them from the worries of what to do next regarding pleasing the woman or looking like a talented lover. It sets their mind free to truly enjoy what they are feeling.

“safe, sane, consensual...”

Since: Jul 08

perpetual arousal

#7 Jul 22, 2008
I enjoy watching submissive men in videos, and admire the strength of will it takes to be a dominant, but I couldn't be the dominant myself. It's just not in my personality.

Since: Jul 08

River Forest, IL

#8 Jul 22, 2008
Ah well, as most of you now know, I am a ProDomme. By "pro," I truly mean that I am a professional. I care about My clients greatly and they know that they can explore their unconventional sexual psyches safely under My care without judgment. It's really not about sex, believe it or not, and there have been many times where My clients/submissives have ended at least one session sobbing in My arms - not from pain but because they've finally released some horrible mental crap that has gripped them for years.

Something I would like everyone who is even remotely interested in BDSM to know: the lifestyle is VERY unlike what you see in movies. Yes, W/we have sessions but they vary GREATLY from D/s to D/s (that's Dominant/submissive) and actual sessions are only a fraction of what goes on for those of U/us who are lifestyle Dominants or submissives.

Since: Jul 08

River Forest, IL

#9 Jul 22, 2008
sorry for the duplicate post... computer weirded out on Me.
Join Free

“safe, sane, consensual...”

Since: Jul 08

perpetual arousal

#10 Jul 22, 2008
That must be a fun job, and I envy your confidence.
I only recently realized that BDSM is what I've been craving my whole life - before, I thought I was some kind of sick freak - my first boyfriend, the father of my children, would tell me I needed to see a psychologist, that there was something wrong with me. I tried for years to suppress my desires. It's only since February of this year that I've been learning that it's okay and normal to be submissive.

Since: Jul 08

River Forest, IL

#11 Jul 22, 2008
Awww, honey, there is NOTHING wrong with you!! My first slave says he's known he was submissive since he was 10 years old and spent many years trying to grasp the concept that 'submissive' doesn't mean 'weak.' And what I do is all about what you described. Our sexual selves touch just about every other part of our lives - think about it. When you feel confident and comfortable with yourself in the bedroom, that attitude is reflected just about everywhere else as well.

Good for you for accepting your submissiveness and remember that submissive, by NO means, equals weakling!

p.s. Being a true master at the art of Professional Domination is a more difficult job than people realize for those of Us who genuinely make the effort to be experts at what We do. But it is also extremely gratifying in many ways :)

“safe, sane, consensual...”

Since: Jul 08

perpetual arousal

#12 Jul 22, 2008
Mistress Kaysee wrote:
Awww, honey, there is NOTHING wrong with you!! My first slave says he's known he was submissive since he was 10 years old and spent many years trying to grasp the concept that 'submissive' doesn't mean 'weak.' And what I do is all about what you described. Our sexual selves touch just about every other part of our lives - think about it. When you feel confident and comfortable with yourself in the bedroom, that attitude is reflected just about everywhere else as well.
Good for you for accepting your submissiveness and remember that submissive, by NO means, equals weakling!
p.s. Being a true master at the art of Professional Domination is a more difficult job than people realize for those of Us who genuinely make the effort to be experts at what We do. But it is also extremely gratifying in many ways :)
Thank you for those kind words. Your right, being submissive does not mean being weak.

I remember a conversation I had with a few co-workers in April (I did not initiate the conversation). Two co-workers were trying to guess whether the rest of the employees were subs or doms. To my surprise, both workers thought I was a dom! I laughed until I cried, then pulled up my long sleeves to show off the rope marks on my wrists. The looks on their faces were so comical, I couldn't stop laughing for the rest of the day.

It's interesting, how many doms are not in control at work, while many subs are in authority positions.

Since: Jul 08

River Forest, IL

#13 Jul 22, 2008
*laughs* true but it doesn't really surprise Me. So many of My subs are sick of having to be in charge all the time and are so relieved to hand over the reins to a capable mind. I happen to be in control 24/7 but I do know that I'm rare. LOL! Actually, I'm rare purely by virtue of the fact that I'm a Dominant female :D

Anyway, has your Dom collared you? There is something truly gratifying in the experience and there are gorgeous Gorean-like collars that are extremely subtle (yet not removeable).

“safe, sane, consensual...”

Since: Jul 08

perpetual arousal

#14 Jul 22, 2008
Yes, he collared me - but we just used ribbon at this time, as finances are rather tight (we just moved to the Chicagoland area, and expenses are far higher here than they were in Wisconsin).

What do you mean by Gorean-like collars?

On a personal note, I love it when he puts the collar on me. A warm, fuzzy feeling, and the sex that follows is always amazing!

Since: Jul 08

River Forest, IL

#15 Jul 22, 2008
LOL - well, welcome to Chicago (you're in the suburbs; way more expensive than the city... I'm from St. Charles but I live downtown now)

Google gorean collars or steel collars... Like I said, you can find some beautiful, subtle (and unremoveable) collars all over the place for a WIDE variety of prices :)

“safe, sane, consensual...”

Since: Jul 08

perpetual arousal

#16 Jul 22, 2008
Mistress Kaysee wrote:
LOL - well, welcome to Chicago (you're in the suburbs; way more expensive than the city... I'm from St. Charles but I live downtown now)
Google gorean collars or steel collars... Like I said, you can find some beautiful, subtle (and unremoveable) collars all over the place for a WIDE variety of prices :)
UNREMOVABLE!!!(ooohh, shivers!!! I like!)

Since: Jul 08

River Forest, IL

#17 Jul 22, 2008
I know, right??!! My slaves LOVE it.

“Walking Attitude”

Since: Aug 07

The Q continuum

#18 Jul 22, 2008
P-S-S wrote:
Bongage and submission might be interesting but I don't think pain is a turn on. Not for me anyways.
I think that being completely dominated by the guy is hot though.
It's easy to be dominated when you're only 12..........

“safe, sane, consensual...”

Since: Jul 08

perpetual arousal

#19 Jul 22, 2008
Mistress Kaysee wrote:
I know, right??!! My slaves LOVE it.
Where can we look at some? Any websites, or stores in the Chicago area?

“safe, sane, consensual...”

Since: Jul 08

perpetual arousal

#20 Jul 22, 2008
Queue wrote:
<quoted text>
It's easy to be dominated when you're only 12..........
ROFL!

Since: Jul 08

River Forest, IL

#21 Jul 22, 2008
Hmm... most of My slaves are male so the collars I use lean toward the masculine. Here is one of My favourite sites:

http://www.houseofcollars.com/

http://www.sblades.com/In-collars.php

Also, I'm not sure what there is in the western suburbs but there are some GREAT shops here in the city!

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