Since: Sep 08

Liverpool, UK

#1 Sep 15, 2008
My girlfriend is 41 as am I, I've been married before and fairly experienced sexually, she's a virgin. Her fiance tried to rape her when she was 19 and she's never trusted a man since. We've been together 6 months and ahe feeels ready for sex with me. However no matter what we try we can't get penetration because she is so tight, can't even enter her with my hand. We've tried all sort of lubes and spent ages on foreplay.
Any ides/suggestions?
I think it's an unconsious anxiety on her part but she thinks it's physical.
my gf

Los Angeles, CA

#2 Sep 15, 2008
my girlfriend was the same way, try doggy style or different positions.

Since: Sep 08

Liverpool, UK

#3 Sep 15, 2008
We have tried allsort of positions. Her whole area is tiny. I've not been with many woman having been married25 years before but usually there is a gap between the clitoris and the vagina, she doesnt have one, her clitoris is right on the top of it. I imagine this will be amazing for her during sex though once we get there.

“safe, sane, consensual...”

Since: Jul 08

perpetual arousal

#4 Sep 15, 2008
I do recall reading about a medical condition that causes a woman to clamp down so hard that penetration is impossible - it is common in women who have been attacked in the past as I recall....let me see if I can find some info....ah, here you go:

http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/vagi...

I would talk to a gynecologist about this problem.

Since: Sep 08

Malaysia

#5 Sep 15, 2008
i really really really find it hard to believe that there are still women on earth that get to 40 and are still virgins ..
SuzieQ

Seattle, WA

#6 Sep 15, 2008
Loriboy wrote:
My girlfriend is 41 as am I, I've been married before and fairly experienced sexually, she's a virgin. Her fiance tried to rape her when she was 19 and she's never trusted a man since. We've been together 6 months and ahe feeels ready for sex with me. However no matter what we try we can't get penetration because she is so tight, can't even enter her with my hand. We've tried all sort of lubes and spent ages on foreplay.
Any ides/suggestions?
I think it's an unconsious anxiety on her part but she thinks it's physical.
My friend had the same problem at 13. A boy slid his tongue all the way in and left it in there for about an hour, and her juices made sex much easier after that.
london boy

Russia

#7 Sep 15, 2008
wow. i dont know. my gf is really tight and im kind of big but lube and lots of foreplay tends to do the trick...
Yummy

Brooklyn, NY

#8 Sep 15, 2008
use your pinky finger first, then tongue

“Because you are... A puppet.”

Since: Sep 08

Long Island

#9 Sep 15, 2008
I would definately speak to a gynecologist about this. I read a news story once where a woman was divorcing her husband and he was a gynecologist. Well he had somehow managed to sew her shut without her knowledge. She did not find out until some years later when she started dating again. She had to have an operation to fix the damage he had caused. The news story was back in the late 80's or early 90's if memory serves. The point is there could be more wrong then just nerves. Seek professional help.

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