Best friend's wife
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Mr Lucky

Olympia, WA

#1 Nov 15, 2008
Bit of a quandary here. They're both very close friends of mine. She's a knockout, but of course in the circumstances, it's nice but irrelevant. But I really have to wonder sometimes. Like she calls us both Punkin. "My two punkins" she calls us. Little things, like in the living room at bedtime when I'm staying over, she cuddles her cat and asks it "Are you gonna sleep with Kenny tonight?" (me) with a sly smile. You'd have to be there.
If the three of us go out to eat, it's just as likely she'll choose the chair opposite ME instead of him. Is this taking making-an-effort-with-hub's-bu ds a bit far? He never seems the least uncomfortable with any of this, and I suppose I've kind of gotten used to it. But not really, since I'm so attracted to her. We're also embarrassingly compatible, with identical views on just about everything. It's just nuts.
NOW I'm invited to a concert with her and a few of her friends, he's not coming. Supposedly to hook me up with one of them. I confess I couldn't care less about them, what I'm more aware of is that after we drop the last one off on the way home, it's her and I alone in the car until we get back to their place. At this point, I can't help feeling that's not accidental.
Now I'm no way a saint, but I was best man at their wedding.
Anyone been in a situation like this?
RegGuy

Boston, MA

#2 Nov 15, 2008
Dude, even if she does like you, don't do anything. If anything, wait for them to break up but otherwise your other friend will be pissed off and if she doesn't break up with him, she's probably not committed to anything with you.

Since: Nov 08

Berlin, CT

#3 Nov 16, 2008
It sure appears she's decided you're going to have sex.
Hopeless

Mission Viejo, CA

#5 Dec 14, 2008
I am crazy about my best friend wife. She has 5 kids and the electricity between us is crazy. I won't do anything because it is wrong on so many levels, you should exercise the same restraint.
Curious

Grand Forks, Canada

#6 Dec 15, 2008
Swingers or she is looking for a thrill?
John

Harwich, MA

#7 Dec 15, 2008
What the hell, go for it, f*ck the shit out of her, but be prepared to lose your best friend.
just a normal dude

Omaha, NE

#8 Dec 15, 2008
Did you say that you were best man at their wedding, or an extra man?

I mean, I am all for consenting adults doing stuff, but am also for the whole transparancy" thing. Rather "full disclosure to all affected parties."

I've made the mistake of sleeping with a married woman. Although they were on their way apart when we did it (she was a former girlfriend who found me a few years later) I certainly accelerated the process. That was wrong of me, and I have always felt guilty.

SOOOO.... unless the husband is on-board with this, I would either bow out of the concert, hook-up with one of the other ladies, or take a taxi home.

Since: Dec 08

Western Chicago suburbs

#9 Dec 16, 2008
Mr Lucky wrote:
Bit of a quandary here. They're both very close friends of mine. She's a knockout, but of course in the circumstances, it's nice but irrelevant. But I really have to wonder sometimes. Like she calls us both Punkin. "My two punkins" she calls us. Little things, like in the living room at bedtime when I'm staying over, she cuddles her cat and asks it "Are you gonna sleep with Kenny tonight?" (me) with a sly smile. You'd have to be there.
If the three of us go out to eat, it's just as likely she'll choose the chair opposite ME instead of him. Is this taking making-an-effort-with-hub's-bu ds a bit far? He never seems the least uncomfortable with any of this, and I suppose I've kind of gotten used to it. But not really, since I'm so attracted to her. We're also embarrassingly compatible, with identical views on just about everything. It's just nuts. NOW I'm invited to a concert with her and a few of her friends, he's not coming. Supposedly to hook me up with one of them. I confess I couldn't care less about them, what I'm more aware of is that after we drop the last one off on the way home, it's her and I alone in the car until we get back to their place. At this point, I can't help feeling that's not accidental. Now I'm no way a saint, but I was best man at their wedding. Anyone been in a situation like this?
I did it many years ago. It came out. I lost the friend, and several mutual friends, as well. One of the dumbest things I've ever done.
Join Free
John

Harwich, MA

#10 Dec 16, 2008
Zagg wrote:
<quoted text>
I did it many years ago. It came out. I lost the friend, and several mutual friends, as well. One of the dumbest things I've ever done.
Yup, me too, my buddy's wife came on to me, and I took her up on it. Brought her home to her wide awake husband (my now former buddy) at 5 AM, and that night, my buddy showed up at my door with questions. I tried to lie my way out of it, didn't work, and I've felt guilty about it ever since. Funny thing, they got divorced, and I didn't even want the woman anymore, there was definitely a forbidden fruit turn-on about the affair in the first place.
Daryll

AOL

#11 Dec 16, 2008
Mr Lucky wrote:
Bit of a quandary here. They're both very close friends of mine. She's a knockout, but of course in the circumstances, it's nice but irrelevant. But I really have to wonder sometimes. Like she calls us both Punkin. "My two punkins" she calls us. Little things, like in the living room at bedtime when I'm staying over, she cuddles her cat and asks it "Are you gonna sleep with Kenny tonight?" (me) with a sly smile. You'd have to be there.
If the three of us go out to eat, it's just as likely she'll choose the chair opposite ME instead of him. Is this taking making-an-effort-with-hub's-bu ds a bit far? He never seems the least uncomfortable with any of this, and I suppose I've kind of gotten used to it. But not really, since I'm so attracted to her. We're also embarrassingly compatible, with identical views on just about everything. It's just nuts.
NOW I'm invited to a concert with her and a few of her friends, he's not coming. Supposedly to hook me up with one of them. I confess I couldn't care less about them, what I'm more aware of is that after we drop the last one off on the way home, it's her and I alone in the car until we get back to their place. At this point, I can't help feeling that's not accidental.
Now I'm no way a saint, but I was best man at their wedding.
Anyone been in a situation like this?
Make the choice lucky man! You dont want to one day say, dang it, I wish I did "that". Do it while you can. Most affairs are just that affairs, the spice of life. If you dont have spice in your life your life is dull. OK I wish you luck and perhaps tell us about that in here.
Oh yeah

Bartlett, IL

#12 Dec 17, 2008
They are using u ti get her hot, either hit it or get out, happened to me , that is how I know
Oh yeah

Bartlett, IL

#13 Dec 17, 2008
They may be in on it, may be Ok with him. "maybe". But do not touch it if he is not, she may be just toying with u , if she is just toying with you u still need to get out. It is one of the baddest power trips a women can use on her husbands friend,Ask me how I know!!!!
Oh yeah

Bartlett, IL

#14 Dec 17, 2008
get out get out ASAP ASAP
Mr Lucky

Seattle, WA

#15 Dec 17, 2008
Well I don't know which of you is right. You don't wanna hear how this came out. I was going to bag the whole thing with the concert until she called to make sure I was coming, of course then I was history. Concert sucked, who cares. Flirting with her friends and at drinks after, "ignoring" her so my real interest wasn't obvious. Right. Knowing glances all around. Driving back, sure enough, hand brushing mine (chills) and somehow got "lost" down a dead end street. Making out was beyond intense after almost 2 years of denial & pretending. I finally admitted I was a prize idiot for encouraging her with my lonely buddy & acting happy for them when the fact is I was always the one more interested in her. She beat on me, cried and said if I had shown any interest it would have been no contest. Just a huge f*ck up all around. Next bomb? She's preg with his baby, and I'm the first to know. So we have some big decision to make. I alrready know what it is of couse- live with it. And what, forget what happened down the dead end? I still can't sleep.
So a word to the wise folks, if you are all excited about hooking up your good buddy, better take your head out of your as* & check what that excitement is really about, or some heartache might be in your future.
just a normal dude

Omaha, NE

#16 Dec 17, 2008
Dude- you might have to be a best friend and get a new best friend. I truly feel for you. Although it sounds like this is not over.

If you don't want to slip, don't walk on slippery things.
John

Harwich, MA

#17 Dec 18, 2008
Have her get an abortion and a divorce and marry her. Or, have her get a divorce and marry her, and raise your best friend's kid. Either way, she'll be yours and you can f*ck her all the time.
Daryll

AOL

#18 Dec 19, 2008
John wrote:
Have her get an abortion and a divorce and marry her. Or, have her get a divorce and marry her, and raise your best friend's kid. Either way, she'll be yours and you can f*ck her all the time.
But isnt the excitement is because she isnt your wife/woman. Once she is "yours" I bet the thrill wont be there.
John

Harwich, MA

#19 Dec 19, 2008
Daryll wrote:
<quoted text>
But isnt the excitement is because she isnt your wife/woman. Once she is "yours" I bet the thrill wont be there.
True that. But then you can cheat on her, give her some of her own medecine.
james

Australia

#20 Dec 19, 2008
who cares about ur friend just f*ck her
All-In

Redondo Beach, CA

#21 Dec 19, 2008
Well we did it -- my wife and I, and one of our oldest, closest friends...after years of flirting between the two of them that never ceased to lead to hot fantasies in the bedroom for us, I gave the green-light for my wife and my buddy to be together -- it was the hottest thing ever, and wife and I are still reliving it and are having the hottest sex...we're all looking forward to the next time! So don't assume that wife would be 'cheating' on her husband -- he may very well be in on it...

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