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1 - 20 of 79 Comments Last updated Feb 18, 2013
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Jill

Memphis, TN

#1 Feb 17, 2013
After a lot of discussion my husband and I had our first threesome with his best friend last night and it was amazing. Sex was incredible and immediately afterward my husband said it was such a turn on to watch me with his friend. However, today when I approached him for sex he said he can't get over the fact that I seemed to enjoy his friend more than him and I'm now regretting doing it. How do I convince him nothing has changed between us???
Jamie

Keller, TX

#3 Feb 17, 2013
Jill wrote:
After a lot of discussion my husband and I had our first threesome with his best friend last night and it was amazing. Sex was incredible and immediately afterward my husband said it was such a turn on to watch me with his friend. However, today when I approached him for sex he said he can't get over the fact that I seemed to enjoy his friend more than him and I'm now regretting doing it. How do I convince him nothing has changed between us???
You could show him the best sexual experience of his life!
Deathpool

Los Angeles, CA

#4 Feb 17, 2013
I said to have a threesome with a girl now

Since: Feb 13

Woodstock, CT

#5 Feb 17, 2013
Feed his ego. Tell him about his d and how he was better.
Jill

Memphis, TN

#6 Feb 17, 2013
Deathpool wrote:
I said to have a threesome with a girl now
Ahhggg!!! I really don't want him to be with another woman. I know that's not fair, but I told him that in advance and he agreed. The thing that bothers me is it was his idea. Yes, I wanted it. His friend is very big and the truth is the sex was the best I've ever had. However, that doesn't change how I feel about my husband.
Jill

Memphis, TN

#7 Feb 17, 2013
Ashtonts208 wrote:
Feed his ego. Tell him about his d and how he was better.
That's just it though, I told him that and he knew I was lying. His exact words were he's never seen me so satisfied and thinks I'm always going to be thinking about his friend when we have sex.
LoveCurves

United States

#8 Feb 17, 2013
Jill wrote:
<quoted text>
That's just it though, I told him that and he knew I was lying. His exact words were he's never seen me so satisfied and thinks I'm always going to be thinking about his friend when we have sex.
Don't lie to him. Tell him it went as good as it could have possibly went. He wanted u enjoy yourself and you did. Then tell him how much u enjoyed "performing" for him with his friend. Then explain since that was his fantasy u want a fantasy. Then tell your fantasy. Whatever that is. Assure him that you are willing to continue to satisfy his fantasies, whatever they are.
Jill

Memphis, TN

#9 Feb 17, 2013
LoveCurves wrote:
<quoted text>
Don't lie to him. Tell him it went as good as it could have possibly went. He wanted u enjoy yourself and you did. Then tell him how much u enjoyed "performing" for him with his friend. Then explain since that was his fantasy u want a fantasy. Then tell your fantasy. Whatever that is. Assure him that you are willing to continue to satisfy his fantasies, whatever they are.
You sound like you've been down this path before.
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LoveCurves

United States

#10 Feb 17, 2013
Jill wrote:
<quoted text>
You sound like you've been down this path before.
Nope. I have a healthy relationship with my gf. We talk and its just common sense, to me. Jealousy doesn't help anyone...problem solving helps everyone. And think how much u 2 will love doing your fantasies together. That's a great sexual relationship. And it sounds like you are very open to ideas.
Jill

Memphis, TN

#11 Feb 17, 2013
LoveCurves wrote:
<quoted text>
Nope. I have a healthy relationship with my gf. We talk and its just common sense, to me. Jealousy doesn't help anyone...problem solving helps everyone. And think how much u 2 will love doing your fantasies together. That's a great sexual relationship. And it sounds like you are very open to ideas.
Very sound advice. Thanks.
LoveCurves

United States

#12 Feb 17, 2013
Jill wrote:
<quoted text>
Very sound advice. Thanks.
No problem. Happy to help.
achyfi

Arlington, MA

#13 Feb 17, 2013
Jill wrote:
<quoted text>
Ahhggg!!! I really don't want him to be with another woman. I know that's not fair, but I told him that in advance and he agreed. The thing that bothers me is it was his idea. Yes, I wanted it. His friend is very big and the truth is the sex was the best I've ever had. However, that doesn't change how I feel about my husband.
It might help to point out that when something is new it's always going to be interesting. That was presumably the first penis you've been involved with other than your husband's in a long time, so of course you were bound to pay attention to it.

You'll probably need to keep reassuring him a little bit, but honestly, if he's going to get insecure about his friend having a big penis he should have thought of that before inviting him into bed. The important thing to emphasize is that no matter how good the sex was, it doesn't make you want to be with your husband any less, any more than a great orgasm from masturbation would make him want to be with you any less.

Since they are friends, it might also help for your husband to talk with the other guy about how he's feeling.
SmartAlec

Austin, TX

#14 Feb 17, 2013
Jill wrote:
After a lot of discussion my husband and I had our first threesome with his best friend last night and it was amazing. Sex was incredible and immediately afterward my husband said it was such a turn on to watch me with his friend. However, today when I approached him for sex he said he can't get over the fact that I seemed to enjoy his friend more than him and I'm now regretting doing it. How do I convince him nothing has changed between us???
Jill, did this potential consequence ever occur to you while your horny hormonal juices were flowing like an open faucet BEFORE the 'Big Night'? That's why a lot of folks who have "been there - done that" highly recommend LEAVING it a fantasy (instead of acting on it). But the bloom is off the rose now! What people don't realize is that every guy is different (just like every woman is): For every ONE guy you read about on these threads who is super-turned on and energized by watching his wife take at 24-incher (yep, they seem to get bigger with every post), there are TEN guys who cannot handle it. Which group is "Normal"? Ha! While that question is open to speculation, does it really matter in your case since you now have a marriage to repair all because of one ecstatic evening with a super-hung (former?) friend??
achyfi

Arlington, MA

#15 Feb 17, 2013
SmartAlec wrote:
<quoted text>
Jill, did this potential consequence ever occur to you while your horny hormonal juices were flowing like an open faucet BEFORE the 'Big Night'? That's why a lot of folks who have "been there - done that" highly recommend LEAVING it a fantasy (instead of acting on it). But the bloom is off the rose now! What people don't realize is that every guy is different (just like every woman is): For every ONE guy you read about on these threads who is super-turned on and energized by watching his wife take at 24-incher (yep, they seem to get bigger with every post), there are TEN guys who cannot handle it. Which group is "Normal"? Ha! While that question is open to speculation, does it really matter in your case since you now have a marriage to repair all because of one ecstatic evening with a super-hung (former?) friend??
You seem to be missing the point that it was her husband who pressured her into doing this. I agree with your point but there's no reason to carp at her about it. He's the one having buyer's remorse.

Since: Nov 11

United States

#16 Feb 17, 2013
When u had the threesome , did your husband have sex with u also or did he just watch an kiss u and other stuff?? Did you allow you husband tfo penetrate u during ygour threesome?? The reason I ask is becauuse he may feel that he cannot satisfy u know. In your own words u said he was huge an also the best sex u ever had. I can see why u are getting to do it while your husband watchess . The erotic,, taboo , adrenaline rush must be off the charts. I can understand u not wanting to do a threesome with a women.it does not turn u on, so why do it?. The thing is you should ask yourselfs what type of sexual relationship u want. It has already changed an there is no going back. You are in a position of power an your husband knows it and it may be scarey. I think if he likes to be submissive it may work. But if he can not handle it , it maybe hard. If your husband would not want to do it any more would u be okay with that???

Since: Nov 12

South Africa

#18 Feb 17, 2013
Jill I do not normally do this but you really seem to get all the help you can get. Go out and buy lingirie that you know your husband might like, make him a suprise dinner(wearing a sexy dress). Talk about your first date, first night you have been with him, how he made you feel. Make sure to tell him that you appreciate him and prove to him by showing him your lingirie(that he never see before). Tell him he is still giving you the unique sexual pleasures and you don't ever want to let him go. Sit on his lap, show him how important he is to you and in bed make the sex be extra great so you both enjoy it equally. Do not mention sex with his friend again and if the convo come up, be cool and say: yah well it happened and don't make too much of it.

Since: Aug 12

Irvine, CA

#19 Feb 17, 2013
I honestly feel like you are in love with your husband and that what made the sex so fantastic was because there was the psychological aspect to the arousal. The thought of having an other man besides your husband made it better, but I think if you had to choose between them, you'd always pick your husband.
Jill

Memphis, TN

#20 Feb 18, 2013
Thanks all for your comments. The truth is my husband didn't pressure me. I was into it just as much as he was and would have no regrets if he had been okay the next day. Yes, I love him very much and have no desire to do anything that would hurt him. As an update he came back and we had a chance to talk about it and I think he's feeling better about things now. I was very honest about how much I enjoyed it but assure him I loved him and that he satisfied me. That helped. I guess I don't understand guys though, because as soon as we started fooling around he wanted me to describe how good it felt to have his friend inside me.... go figure.

Since: Nov 11

United States

#21 Feb 18, 2013
"As soon as we started to foo around he wanted me to describe how good it felt to have his friend inside me" . That should be a hint to you about what he wants.

Since: Nov 11

United States

#22 Feb 18, 2013
PS, could you please let us know if you have a threesome again. Should lay out some ground rules if u do about if your husband should be present always ? And or if it should be done occasionaly ? Or you may want to take a chance and tell him that u are in charge now??(Which may be what he wants and u want) last option is a big risk to say if it is really the way u want it??

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