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United States

#34 Mar 17, 2013
That really does suck!!! Its sad that a man woud do that to his family, and you dont know what diseases he could have given to you. I think its disgusting a man screwing another man and going back to his wife. I have nothing against gays as long as their not trying to lie about being straight and screwing me.. hope everything gets better for you and your family.

Amsterdam, Netherlands

#35 Mar 17, 2013
Jenny wrote:
After 25 yrs of marriage my husband left me for a man whom he'd been cheating with behind my back for yrs.We have 2 children that have also been duped I'm more mad at myself for being so blind I didn't have a clue. I feel dirty and disguted.
Anybody else have this happen to them and how do you cope?
Thanks in advance for any real comments.
Is your husband's name Jade?
Harry Butts

United States

#36 Mar 17, 2013
Norton wrote:
<quoted text>
Is your husband's name Jade?

Little Rock, AR

#37 Mar 17, 2013
Cynthia wrote:
my husband just moved out after 30 years of marriage, three young adult kids. The reason depressed , midlife and had to solve personal problems. I confronted him at his new place, where we found evidence of an affair. yes, It is with a Gay..... we were told to no longer can live with you, I am happiest alone and had to move on, goodluck to your wonderful lives.... Bisexual, or gay, never saw a real sign .He was having this relationship for two years. Perfect father, husband and catholic active. Did he got drugged and failed into his arms or did he just let it go. Remeber all the kids are adults no more responsabilities, but me. I am so hurt... the fact is that he ignores all communication he just moved on to a new beginning. He took all his belongings all records and of course he planned all in advanced. We are sad, devastated, depressed and lonely. How do you cope with this separation or divorce??
Please need your advice.
Just remember karma is a b•tch.He will get his.

Coquitlam, Canada

#41 Nov 28, 2013
I am soooo sorry to hear you went through this. I am a gay woman, and I wouldn't give you the lame excuse that it is everyone else's fault but his (i.e. christians expecting gay people to marry, pressure). At times I knew I could marry a man and life would be easier in many ways, but I knew that was not at all fair to any man worth marrying. I thought about the OTHER person more than myself. I'd rather be single my whole like that use someone as a mask. This is what your husband did to you, and he ruined your ability to trust people. You should be mad. I can actually relate to what you have been through because (and I swear this is true, although it will sound crazy), I had a girlfriend of 5 years who was cheating on me with a mutual friend of ours who was a gay man! Then she told me she identified as a gay man in a woman's body. WTF. Then she left me for him and got her boobs chopped off, and is now making youtube videos about her transition to a man. I even had friends of mine right after this happened pretty much abandon me to support HER, telling me it must be so hard on HER to realize she is a gay man. Whaaaat? She was the one lying to me and cheating. So, I think what it boils down to is, orientation aside, cheaters and liars can really, really ruin your life. They lie, manipulate, and it's the deception that hurts so much in the end. What I am the most mad at is that this person stole my innocence and my trust. I have never cheated, and never manipulated another person. I was always in it for life. Luckily I found a good woman years later and now that laws allow it, we're married. I still have nightmares that she will leave me for a gay man and tell me she is a man inside... stuff like that really f's with your sense of reality, and it can make you look back over your entire life and it can feel like a farce. All I can suggest is do not let him "win". You were not a fool... you were fooled. And that karma is on HIM not you. I suggest finding a good support group. I found a group for people who had been cheated on, and it really helped to talk things out with people in the same space as me. Gay, straight, bisexual... it doesnt matter, there are cheaters out there and they tend to gravitate towards people like us... nice and loyal folks. They are manipulators and users, and they always try to elicit sympathy by playing the victim. I AM gay, and I have no sympathy for weak people who marry people of the wrong orientation for them to protect themselves. That is the most selfish thing I have heard of. Just be single if you dont have the balls to be honest. I am so so sorry. It's kind of weird that I am a gay woman and you are a straight woman and we were both cheated on with our partners leaving for gay men. Haha.. let them go though, I have heard the gay male scene ends up brutal anyhow, and they will BOTH be cheated on, I guarantee it. Maybe karma will give them some warts or something.

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