Why do straight women, hang out at ga...

Why do straight women, hang out at gay clubs??

Posted in the Gay/Lesbian Forum

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“I wanna be free...”

Since: Mar 08

Happyville

#1 Mar 27, 2008
I use to live by a large gay club in the city, and noticed there was always females streaming in and out of the club.
Why?
There was a lesbian club right across the street, I wonder if some gay males are annoyed by that?

“Marriage=Love+Co mmitment.....”

Since: Oct 07

Location hidden

#2 Mar 28, 2008
Because there is usually dancing, so more fun than straight clubs. But more importantly, they don't have to worry about getting hit on repeatedly by men when they just want to hang out with friends and have a good time.

“I wanna be free...”

Since: Mar 08

Happyville

#3 Mar 28, 2008
Interesting...very interesting, I'll have a much better response for you later in the day, but right now my brains tired, I've been up all night, need to shut down for a minute...More on this later though...for sure...stay tuned...
Disgusted American

Philadelphia, PA

#4 Mar 28, 2008
I know a few women (2 married)who have gone on Gay Cruises -(Man's cruise) they Loved it..had a great time, were treated like Queens by the gay men ie: attention,free drinks....got to touch sexy men constantly and vise vers..and NO one felt threatened! They're planning another trip. Thier husbands didn't mind them going on the cruise as they felt Non-threatened....needless to say their wives got to "feel up" HOT guys,they themselves got felt up, and everyone had a great time..partying,dancing,sunning ...and NO men hitting on them.
Jade

Lincoln, NE

#5 Mar 28, 2008
Last time I was in Reno, NV, my boyfriend and I were sitting at a gay bar and two beautiful women came in and sat next to us. We started talking and they were strippers and just wanted to relax, so they came to the gay bar to get away from straight guys hitting on them. They literally wanted to leave their work behind! They told us that male strippers they know often went to the lesbian bars to relax. I really wish I had that problem, that my good looks and body made me "hide" in certain bars! LOL

“Rational thoughts appreciated”

Since: Aug 07

United States

#6 Mar 28, 2008
More often than not, when I went to straight bars, the guys would grab you! I'm talking, I'm dancing with a group of friends, and some guy comes up and starts poking me from behind and grabbing at me. That really bugged me. I always figured it was just the fact it was _guys_ touching me since I'm gay, but apparently it is a prob for the straight gals as well.

Don't get me wrong, people come up and dance with me at the gay bars, but they aren't grabbing me and being rude.

“Hello from Nova Prospekt”

Since: Nov 07

Waukesha, Wisconsin

#7 Mar 28, 2008
cute guys wrote:
I use to live by a large gay club in the city, and noticed there was always females streaming in and out of the club. Why?
I don’t know, why don’t you ask them?
cute guys wrote:
There was a lesbian club right across the street, I wonder if some gay males are annoyed by that?
Generally, no. My man works at a gay bar, and everyone is welcome.

GF42

“ reality, what a concept”

Since: Nov 07

this one

#8 Mar 28, 2008
For women who aren't on the prowl to get laid, gay bars offer a safer, more welcoming, and certainly more enjoyable environment than most straight bars. As aslan55 mentioned, most straight clubs tend to be meat markets for women and straight men are not shy about wanting to test out the merchandise.
When I lived in New York, a group of us at the company I worked with had a weekly Friday night queer bar crawl. A group of about twenty, made up primarily of gay men but also included a number of straight, single and married women would hit a half dozen gay bars and clubs in the West Village every week. They came along with us because they always had a good time and didn't have to worry about their safety.
I think the reason that they're not as attracted to the lesbian bars is that they would feel that they're intruding on something they're not into. Besides, even though most of my best friends are lesbians, gay men are a heck of a lot more fun to hang out with...

“I will not go quietly.”

Since: Feb 07

Indianapolis Indiana

#9 Mar 28, 2008
From what I've seen, they tend to go out there so they can enjoy themselves, have a good time, and not have to worry about being hit on every 30 seconds. There used to be 2 Japanese couples back where I first came out that used to go in the Gay bar because it was fun and one of the few places they could go without being harassed.

“Choose wisely!”

Since: Jul 07

Los Angeles

#10 Mar 28, 2008
Because it's a completely safe non-sexual environment for them to have fun with men and they can totally be themselves.

No mystery. Straight women are safest with gay men.

Eric

“Smile...it's free!”

Since: Mar 08

Here and there!

#11 Mar 28, 2008
Everyone is welcome.

The gay bar that I go to is mostly lesbians. We have straight women in there all of the time they are not preyed upon like the meat markets for straight people.

We do have one gay bar that is not friendly to women...at all.

“Rational thoughts appreciated”

Since: Aug 07

United States

#12 Mar 28, 2008
honeysprite wrote:
Everyone is welcome.
The gay bar that I go to is mostly lesbians. We have straight women in there all of the time they are not preyed upon like the meat markets for straight people.
We do have one gay bar that is not friendly to women...at all.
There is one of those here too. It's a bear bar that _strongly_ discourages women to enter. We're talking if a female walks in, the entire bar turns to look upon you, and grumble. The bathrooms said "men" and "men (and women I guess)"

“Smile...it's free!”

Since: Mar 08

Here and there!

#13 Mar 28, 2008
alsan55 wrote:
<quoted text>
There is one of those here too. It's a bear bar that _strongly_ discourages women to enter. We're talking if a female walks in, the entire bar turns to look upon you, and grumble. The bathrooms said "men" and "men (and women I guess)"
It might be the same bar!! That is exactly what happens. If you enter they all crowd around you to make you uncomfortable.

“I wanna be free...”

Since: Mar 08

Happyville

#14 Mar 28, 2008
Your heart felt stories are making me sad....
I never knew....So it's all about respect and fun...your saying the majority of women just want to be respected and have fun....interesting....I'm learning, please tell me more...
RainbowWarrior

Roy, WA

#15 Mar 28, 2008
honeysprite wrote:
<quoted text>
It might be the same bar!! That is exactly what happens. If you enter they all crowd around you to make you uncomfortable.
There are exclusive men only bars in alot of cities. I also heard of an all womens bar in Chicago. The womyn would come right out and tell men that "you have YOUR own bar, and this one is OURS!" - I used to travel with my best friend (a str8 woman) and we would go to the bars in other cities while traveling (some thought we were a gay couple). She was a big gurl,and had a short masculine haircut, and dressed abit on the masc. side ( and often no bra). We had the best time in Nashville one time- the guys there were friendly, especially to HER!(that made me a little jealous-LOL)- But a long as we had a good time wherever we went, that was the important thing, as we wasn't looking for a hook-up or anything anyway. It was all about atmosphere. She was comfortable, I was with people I could talk to, dance with, etc. So I don't understand why more bars are so intolerant. We ALL have money to spend, and sometimes are just looking for someplace to "hang out" while in town.
RainbowWarrior

Roy, WA

#16 Mar 28, 2008
oops- I meant to say "I dont understand why some bars are not more tolerant"

“I wanna be free...”

Since: Mar 08

Happyville

#17 Mar 28, 2008
Interesting, very interesting....

I'm learning a lot about human nature on here...cause I had my own ideas of why I thought women went to gay bars...but after hearing your stories, maybe my stance has softened...more please more...this is better than any Television reality show...
Mungie

Toronto, Canada

#18 Apr 1, 2008
I'm a straight guy and gone to plenty of clubs, all straight and I agree that too many guys in them were total pigs towards the women.
More than a few of my friends were being groped by strange men as they walked to the bar or bathroom.
It's just plain disgusting and creepy behaviour. Guys like this should be tossed out on their asses and maybe even be charged for this kind of behaviour.
I would say that in most cases that women going to gay clubs is a way to get away from the extremely overbearing approach that happens with straight men crowding their space.
Then again, I know that many women who if they go into a club and don't get hit on, will take it personally. It's about ego sometimes.
As for all mens/womens club? If you accidently wandered into one you shouldn't be treated liks dirt for being there. Very uncivilized and totally uncalled for.
People acting like this are being rude and unnecessarily obusive but this happens in all kinds of clubs that cater to a specific demographic. Not just in gay or straight clubs.
However..... if you went in knowing that particular place didn't really want you there to begin with then why in god's name were you even in there?
no name

United States

#19 Apr 1, 2008
have more fun without feeling like im at the meet market i just want to have fun and not be hunted down

“I wanna be free...”

Since: Mar 08

Happyville

#20 Apr 2, 2008
I think some guys go to gay clubs, because they want to be the center of attention, and they can't do that when women are around. And I think women do the same at lesbian clubs, they want to be the center of attention, in the absence of males.

Some guys have been hurt by women, and go to gay clubs to get away from women, and some women have been hurt by men, and go to lesbian clubs to get away from men.

Some guys can only be or act 'gay' in the abscence of women, and some women can only be or 'act' lesbian in the abscence of me.

Women judge males differently than a gay guy judges or rates another gay guy,
and males judge women differently than a lesbian judges or rates another lesbian.

Sometimes guys go to gay clubs, to escape thier traditional roles as males, and sometimes women go to lesbian clubs to escape their traditional roles as women.

And sometimes niether can do that in the presence of the other, or find it more difficult to do so.

What am I trying to say, nothing really, yet a lot.

Just brainstorming, throwing ideas out there.

Ideas are like merchandise on a shelf, you walk by and shop until you find one you like, and then you grab it.

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