Do Gay Men Fall in Love With Women

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Michelle

Nottingham, UK

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#3338
Jan 12, 2013
 
Ladies just a thought but have you tried googling 'I'm a gay man and I think I'm in love with my female best friend', I did and not nearly as many posts come up. I too have a gay best friend and we love each other but we're not IN love, I think it's easy to believe something more can come of it but you should probably remember there aren't really any boundaries between you, hence the ability to get so close. If you don't care about the sex and you already spend a lot of time together, why change anything? As for the sexual advances he's also always playing with my boobs and says if he were straight he'd have sex with me. This is someone by the way who has slept with just as many girls as he has men, but he knows he's gay because the last woman he slept with was about 6 years ago! Hope that helps you put it into perspective?
CAG

El Segundo, CA

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#3339
Jan 16, 2013
 
This made me cry! I wish that everyone could be so open-minded about things as you. My best wishes for you and your partner.
Jackson wrote:
Hi,
straight, bisexual, gay...If you think about it, these are all 'social constructions' i.e.: labels created by human beings to denote who one has sex with. If anyone searches to find out the origins of these words, they first appeared after the middle ages, when the Church decided to persecute certain other religious groups by declaring that they engaged in sodomy (anal sex), and that this was contrary to Cristian faith. It is at this point that a division between human beings on the basis of sexual arousal appeared. If one looks to ancient civilisations (i.e.: Greeks, Romans, Egyptians, Chinese, Japanese, Native Americans), no words existed then, which separated us on the basis of sexual arousal. In fact, if you take the ancient Greeks as an example, most men had a wife but at the same time male lovers. In the society, they had wives in order to produce offspring, but ancient texts say that they had their male lovers for pleasure.
In today's society, people grow up with the words 'gay straight and bi' in their vocabulary from when they are in school (for instance, listening to the word 'gay' used on the playground as a swearword), and are therefore led to believe that you must either be one or the other, and that only one of the two (ie: straight) is the 'better' one. In other words, you are socially forced to take a decision as to your sexuality and classify yourself as A or B. But this approach can be too restrictive for the truenature of human sexuality. Just look at ancient civilisations, or indeed modern ones which have not been influenced in any way by the West (or the Church), such as several tribes in Asia (I do not recall their names, but if anyone is interested can find out more); in one of these tribes, I remember reading that boys from the age of puberty until they become a young adult engage in homosexual acts with older males. This is viewed as socially good, and what every young man must do; in fact you are considered abnormal if you do not. After a certain age though, when the boy is considered to have got 'all the wisdom required to become a man' from his older counterparty, the homosexual sex stops and he is now allowed to web a woman with whom he will have sex and have children.
All this to say that I believe (1) of course it is possible to love anyone truly, regardless of what you like in bed; and (2) many MANY people could feel sexual arousal for both sexes if they just let their minds free and experimented without any fear of condemnation or ridicule... Can you imagine trying to do 'sexual stuff' with a girl after many years thinking you are only attracted to men? The result is anxiety ('will I get hard and will I be able to please her?','will I make a fool of myself?')...not the best way to explore one's sexuality eh?
Anyay, this is getting very long but it's because I have read most of what has been written here and it is very interesting. By the way, I am male in a relationship with another guy.
Elaine

Marietta, GA

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#3340
Jan 17, 2013
 
ikryptoniter wrote:
see if you notice if his two middle fingers at the tips are of the same length. If they are, then he is gay. Gay guys have different finger sizes from straight guys. Much the same hand as a girl. True fact.
I don't know where people get this stuff at. I have been in the gay community for most of my adult life & my partner he's gay; I'm straight. His finger sizes are no different than straight guys.

I sat in wonder were this stuff comes from. There is such a thing as "gaydar" but you have to be in the gay community to know how to hone in on it. YES, there are SOME gay's you can tell off the bat. But people look at my partner & can't tell he's gay UNLESS "gaydar".

Since: Apr 10

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#3341
Jan 20, 2013
 
I just read this . I don't think i read this before. I have no idea what you are talking about but you are still correct i am a good listener. Racist? because i do not want to write on a site too often that is meant for writing about gay men falling in love with women? I am over my gay man fallin and i falling for him situation now a little over a year. I do not want to go back there so i should get off of here. And i was but then you came along . Which was a lot of fun and i liked it. I LOOOOVVVE having pen pals. A nd i was so happy to be that with you. If i sound negative about writing too much i am just protecting myself here thats all. It has nothing to do with what race anyone is. And if i say a little too often maybe that I do not want to meet you .I am being safe again protecting me as you are probably a wonderful man but i just do not want to meet someone i write as a pen pal. I am not open to it. And maybe i am the one missing out. HOW will i ever know . I wont but i want to leave it that way. maybe its time i go to a real pen pal site and find a real pen pal to write. But i wish you luck and please i hate to have someone feel like i am a racist. I am far from it and i will miss our nice emails. ANd NEVER did i think you were desperate. I have been called that on this site but i never thought that of you or anyone. I was just writing a lot
Vance wrote:
<quoted text>bev! you keep throwing that writing too much stuff at me. Racist people will always be around no matter where you go! I will never ever ever ever ever ever ask you out! You can be at peace now.. That a blackman wont chase you. Soo you dont have to respond if it makes you fdel beter infront of these animals on this site. I havent writen in over a month to you, your a good listener thats why I write you.. Not to sexual harrast you. I met a blackwoman out in cali. She will come to Tampa to join me. See how easy that was to tell all you mean people where I live whithout over reacting, I really liked writing you cause you made me feel speacial.dont respond back it will keep all your friends on this site happy.
Vance

United States

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#3342
Jan 20, 2013
 
bev0309 wrote:
I just read this . I don't think i read this before. I have no idea what you are talking about but you are still correct i am a good listener. Racist? because i do not want to write on a site too often that is meant for writing about gay men falling in love with women? I am over my gay man fallin and i falling for him situation now a little over a year. I do not want to go back there so i should get off of here. And i was but then you came along . Which was a lot of fun and i liked it. I LOOOOVVVE having pen pals. A nd i was so happy to be that with you. If i sound negative about writing too much i am just protecting myself here thats all. It has nothing to do with what race anyone is. And if i say a little too often maybe that I do not want to meet you .I am being safe again protecting me as you are probably a wonderful man but i just do not want to meet someone i write as a pen pal. I am not open to it. And maybe i am the one missing out. HOW will i ever know . I wont but i want to leave it that way. maybe its time i go to a real pen pal site and find a real pen pal to write. But i wish you luck and please i hate to have someone feel like i am a racist. I am far from it and i will miss our nice emails. ANd NEVER did i think you were desperate. I have been called that on this site but i never thought that of you or anyone. I was just writing a lot<quoted text>
bev, I worked with bigot blackwomen who say the samething to me for only being nice to them. I told them the samethimg I told you. Im just too nice and people take me wrong and say and do mean things to me in the end. You hurt me when you say such? Itd ok your judt being you..over protective. But my niceness has got me nothing but dissrespect from people. Please dont go. I like writing you. Ibq???you listen and you give me the hood redponse I need.
Vance

United States

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#3343
Jan 20, 2013
 
bev0309 wrote:
I just read this . I don't think i read this before. I have no idea what you are talking about but you are still correct i am a good listener. Racist? because i do not want to write on a site too often that is meant for writing about gay men falling in love with women? I am over my gay man fallin and i falling for him situation now a little over a year. I do not want to go back there so i should get off of here. And i was but then you came along . Which was a lot of fun and i liked it. I LOOOOVVVE having pen pals. A nd i was so happy to be that with you. If i sound negative about writing too much i am just protecting myself here thats all. It has nothing to do with what race anyone is. And if i say a little too often maybe that I do not want to meet you .I am being safe again protecting me as you are probably a wonderful man but i just do not want to meet someone i write as a pen pal. I am not open to it. And maybe i am the one missing out. HOW will i ever know . I wont but i want to leave it that way. maybe its time i go to a real pen pal site and find a real pen pal to write. But i wish you luck and please i hate to have someone feel like i am a racist. I am far from it and i will miss our nice emails. ANd NEVER did i think you were desperate. I have been called that on this site but i never thought that of you or anyone. I was just writing a lot<quoted text>
Find a real penpal? Ifwhat I sead about you being a racist, im sorry, your not. Ok?? I miss writing you friend.
eijei19

Buting, Philippines

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#3344
Jan 21, 2013
 
i fell for my gay friend because he seemed to be an ideal guy (he aint out yet). then i found out he had a relationship with another guy friend. the three of us are always together. it has become suffocating really when i discovered it. though both of them still pretends to be straight. i think its not worth to fight for it when you see him look at another guy with so much longing. you just realize you can never be the type he would fall inlove with. maybe you can change a bi, but not a 100% gay...
Tex

Antofagasta, Chile

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#3345
Jan 21, 2013
 
Well, I agree with Joe. There´s a lot of people out there who have tendencies and the´re not 100% gay, straigt or bi. That is why the tags are so useless when it comes to feelings. If someone have true feelings about someone else and they are able to build a relationship WITH satisfying sex, who cares about their previous experiences! I think everybody should be more open about this issue, no matter they consider themselves straight, gay, bi or whatever

Since: Apr 10

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#3346
Jan 21, 2013
 
I like pen pals since i was 5 years old ha. serious. NOTHING to do with you or how i feel. what i meant is a real pen pal site on the internet . They have those(i checked them out) and i can be a pen pal to someone as obviously that is what i want. But its finding one it takes time just like finding a soulmate .a nd i have only so much time. Of course. I will write you here . I have nothing , absolutely nothing against you .I thought and still think you are a nice guy. And even one gay man on here commented that he thought it was cool we were pen pals and got along. ITs just a few of the women? For some reason got angry. Not all just some. And i do not like pissing people off. even if i dont know them. I am not into commenting on gay men falling in love with women anymore. Happily as that means to me i am wayyy over my feelings for my ex gay friend who asked me to take it to more than friends. I used to feel i missed out and i should have taken him up on it. Anyway i may have been Just my overly cautious self again. BUt i will write you. and i will try not to say we are writing too much. I can just respond when i feel OK doing it. right? Not your worry. I told the musician i am seeing about how i fell for a gay man . He said he knew a couple like that in his 30's but does not keep in touch anymore. So he said he is aware that happens and thinks its quite normal even though he is straight. I like him a lot. BUt i fear he is too non conventional and wont take the time it takes to grow this relationship. ITs most likely a temporary thing. I hate that but people are the way they are . And someday i will meet my steady guy again. I dont know yet if its the musician or now. He used to tour with a famous rock band in his twenties. NO more. so ya think he could have settled down some?. He has. he does music for TV and writes for other perofrmers , but not enough i think in my intuitive mind. time tells as he is telling me he thinks of me every day. so i am into this right now. he did have a long term gf of 7 years once woop! ha I say again HA DANG i wish it were easier to find someone
Vance wrote:
<quoted text>Find a real penpal? Ifwhat I sead about you being a racist, im sorry, your not. Ok?? I miss writing you friend.
Vance

United States

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#3347
Jan 22, 2013
 
bev0309 wrote:
I like pen pals since i was 5 years old ha. serious. NOTHING to do with you or how i feel. what i meant is a real pen pal site on the internet . They have those(i checked them out) and i can be a pen pal to someone as obviously that is what i want. But its finding one it takes time just like finding a soulmate .a nd i have only so much time. Of course. I will write you here . I have nothing , absolutely nothing against you .I thought and still think you are a nice guy. And even one gay man on here commented that he thought it was cool we were pen pals and got along. ITs just a few of the women? For some reason got angry. Not all just some. And i do not like pissing people off. even if i dont know them. I am not into commenting on gay men falling in love with women anymore. Happily as that means to me i am wayyy over my feelings for my ex gay friend who asked me to take it to more than friends. I used to feel i missed out and i should have taken him up on it. Anyway i may have been Just my overly cautious self again. BUt i will write you. and i will try not to say we are writing too much. I can just respond when i feel OK doing it. right? Not your worry. I told the musician i am seeing about how i fell for a gay man . He said he knew a couple like that in his 30's but does not keep in touch anymore. So he said he is aware that happens and thinks its quite normal even though he is straight. I like him a lot. BUt i fear he is too non conventional and wont take the time it takes to grow this relationship. ITs most likely a temporary thing. I hate that but people are the way they are . And someday i will meet my steady guy again. I dont know yet if its the musician or now. He used to tour with a famous rock band in his twenties. NO more. so ya think he could have settled down some?. He has. he does music for TV and writes for other perofrmers , but not enough i think in my intuitive mind. time tells as he is telling me he thinks of me every day. so i am into this right now. he did have a long term gf of 7 years once woop! ha I say again HA DANG i wish it were easier to find someone <quoted text>
bev, I completely understood everything you wrote.I broke it off with the cali woman. She was a gold digger! She asked me to buy her a car to drive here to live with me. She sead .... Us black women only need yall niccas fo cash! I told her to get lost. I suck at romance. Im just going to have flings with two swedish scandinavian women who always stare and come over and watch football. These women are gym owners and they both are teaching me their language. Friends and lover.. No one gets hurt.loulou her name is 6feet looks like maria sharapova. She nevet stop watching me. This may sound strange bev sometimes I wish it was you ibq.

Since: Apr 10

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#3348
Jan 23, 2013
 
Sorry again. steer clear of women who want your money. she's sad . Well the musician was always trying to manipulate me , hes sad. Called me only when he felt like it. was ok to see a few times a month, but saying to me wow i think of you everyday . What a sicko.. I am sick with flu but it was true but after i realize he drags out everything and it was one excuse after the other.. My car is being repaired. I am composing all night with people blah blah. its all true but if he wanted to see me he would say lets meet this night. He rarely did so I ended it and called him on htat; and he said i was high maintenance? Ha thats a laugh I did want to see him once a week. i guess thats high maintenance to him. So i have a new date for sat night with someone new,. Hes saying all the right things but you know how that goes. I dont believe it till i see it. Two swedish women. when have i heard that before.? Ha a few times. never do the guys say i was with two white jewish women with big butts ha ha. anyway. I will say it don't get upset. I do not want to meet you when you say i wish it was me it freaks me out. I do not even have cat eyes. Im just a nice person who loves to email. i emailed the musician . HE hated it. He said to try to keep me interested. I will always answer dear but i am not into emails. I said i am not either but you dont ask me over enough to tell you in your friggin ear ha
Vance wrote:
<quoted text>bev, I completely understood everything you wrote.I broke it off with the cali woman. She was a gold digger! She asked me to buy her a car to drive here to live with me. She sead .... Us black women only need yall niccas fo cash! I told her to get lost. I suck at romance. Im just going to have flings with two swedish scandinavian women who always stare and come over and watch football. These women are gym owners and they both are teaching me their language. Friends and lover.. No one gets hurt.loulou her name is 6feet looks like maria sharapova. She nevet stop watching me. This may sound strange bev sometimes I wish it was you ibq.
Vance

United States

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#3349
Jan 24, 2013
 
bev0309 wrote:
Sorry again. steer clear of women who want your money. she's sad . Well the musician was always trying to manipulate me , hes sad. Called me only when he felt like it. was ok to see a few times a month, but saying to me wow i think of you everyday . What a sicko.. I am sick with flu but it was true but after i realize he drags out everything and it was one excuse after the other.. My car is being repaired. I am composing all night with people blah blah. its all true but if he wanted to see me he would say lets meet this night. He rarely did so I ended it and called him on htat; and he said i was high maintenance? Ha thats a laugh I did want to see him once a week. i guess thats high maintenance to him. So i have a new date for sat night with someone new,. Hes saying all the right things but you know how that goes. I dont believe it till i see it. Two swedish women. when have i heard that before.? Ha a few times. never do the guys say i was with two white jewish women with big butts ha ha. anyway. I will say it don't get upset. I do not want to meet you when you say i wish it was me it freaks me out. I do not even have cat eyes. Im just a nice person who loves to email. i emailed the musician . HE hated it. He said to try to keep me interested. I will always answer dear but i am not into emails. I said i am not either but you dont ask me over enough to tell you in your friggin ear ha<quoted text>
bev! Lol!! You got me smiling again, what I ment, I wish I had a woman like you to marry! Your a good listener, your healthy with a big but your funny with two personalities.. One is sexy and straight forward. The other is this submissive hot warm jewish girl looking for a soulmate, and wont settle for less. What I been telling you. I love your figure your brown eyes your brunette hair your almond eyes, you can sing and dance. Why not want you??? I do want you bev! But I wont say this again cause you know now. I dont case no one. Your everything I always wanted. Your older and sat in your ways. I feel better now its off pf my chest. I want you and need you! And im not jh ard up or lonely, I want my ibq. Im going jogging with loulou this morning. Take care
jonestly

Amsterdam, Netherlands

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#3350
Jan 24, 2013
 
Honeslty i dont know what drives gay men. also im not quite sure what to thinl of myself. i wont tell my exact story but however i will repeat the same question: do gay men fall in love with women? in addition, at first sight? I know i have 3 or 4 times even though i am only 21. Ocasioanally girla are attracted to me but ir never went further then kissing and cuddling. many people suspect im gay and i know hey have reasons to. makes me wonder if wjat they see is right, i mean gay, or that i am just a lonely introverted sucker. i am attracted to men but i never had anu kind od arouaing fewligns for a man. is that beceause i hide thoae feelings? Could i even be aware of hiding any feelings? does rhis sound like just any closet homosexual ? i dont know why, the only thing closest to being gay is wondering if i am and others thinking i am... then he mystery remains unsolved why i ever fell in love with girls some of them i dont even know. i dont talk about sx a lot like some of my friends. so is there a place like a forum where thse kind of stuff is widely discuased? Hello?
Vance

United States

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#3351
Jan 24, 2013
 
jonestly wrote:
Honeslty i dont know what drives gay men. also im not quite sure what to thinl of myself. i wont tell my exact story but however i will repeat the same question: do gay men fall in love with women? in addition, at first sight? I know i have 3 or 4 times even though i am only 21. Ocasioanally girla are attracted to me but ir never went further then kissing and cuddling. many people suspect im gay and i know hey have reasons to. makes me wonder if wjat they see is right, i mean gay, or that i am just a lonely introverted sucker. i am attracted to men but i never had anu kind od arouaing fewligns for a man. is that beceause i hide thoae feelings? Could i even be aware of hiding any feelings? does rhis sound like just any closet homosexual ? i dont know why, the only thing closest to being gay is wondering if i am and others thinking i am... then he mystery remains unsolved why i ever fell in love with girls some of them i dont even know. i dont talk about sx a lot like some of my friends. so is there a place like a forum where thse kind of stuff is widely discuased? Hello?
yes Its called the vance and bev help line.its on the gay and lesbian forum?

Since: Apr 10

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#3352
Jan 24, 2013
 
Ha i am not going. I find a pen pal who likes writing me? I am hooked at the expense of the women on this site. Ha i read what you wrote below you are too silly HA. BUt I am going to respond to him right after. If i am still on this site i think i can give some great advice for him. After all i was super infatuated and in love with a gay man . And he was with me. I find myself thinking of him ocassionally. I am sorry there are so many mean folks. I am nice like you and its tough to be nice. We take all this K and we have to be strong and not do it back. I think you can never be too nice. But there are times i felt too nice. Like to this musiican who basically tried to fool me into seeing him and it would have been sex only. Now dont get me wrong. I am not against that . I just do not like to be fooled into it. I cant blame him . He is a guy but I just wish i didnt feel so frigging manipulated by him. I had to tell him off . then he calls me too needy. HA i was just defending my pride and telling him no way i cannot be a part of ths. Thing is i will see him again at my friends party. As she and her husband have many parites and they are mostly musician and he will go to play and be around them. I will be friendly to him. I told him that in the email when i also told him stop telling me you are sorry and you think of me every day yet you dont call for two weeks and do that all over again saying you are sorry. IT got old. I guess i sort of liked him or i would just ignore him
Vance wrote:
<quoted text>bev, I worked with bigot blackwomen who say the samething to me for only being nice to them. I told them the samethimg I told you. Im just too nice and people take me wrong and say and do mean things to me in the end. You hurt me when you say such? Itd ok your judt being you..over protective. But my niceness has got me nothing but dissrespect from people. Please dont go. I like writing you. Ibq???you listen and you give me the hood redponse I need.

Since: Apr 10

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#3353
Jan 24, 2013
 
I dont think anyone really has proven why a man is gay. I just accept it. And i found(in my experience) sometimes it runs in families . So maybe part genetic. But i dont have the answers. My ex gay friends brother was also gay . He was married and only liked men. My ex pay friend(he hurt me so we no longer talk) says he is gay. he likes mens bodies better than women. But he was with women in high school and jr high he told me. But he never had complete sex with them. So he says he is gay and was with men since college. He and i fell in love without anything sexual. We just wanted to be around each other all the time. I loved him and he did me. But he get mean so it ended. I dont think my gay friend fell in love with me at first site. He said he thought i was pretty all the time but he was not interested And neither was i even though he was also good looking and nice to do things with. Over 4 years we got closer . He broke up with his bf and then asked to date me. I thought he was on the rebound and said no . I was thinking about it . He got hurt as i said no and he was really mean to me. So yes my ex gay friend fell in love with women in jr high and hgh school . He is a passionate OVERLY person and started early. My son is like you . He is 23 and still no gf. But he is not into men i know that. he is just shy and afraid to get hurt. So he waits for the right one. I tell him you need to take risks. I guess i know i am speaking only of my own life. But i do have a close gf whose son figured out he was gay about your age. He was looking at gay porn in high school and my gf was worried . Took him to therapy even. He said mom i am just gay curious thats it. But it turned out he is gay and lets everyone know now. Never was completely with a girl either but girls like him a lot and he has many girls as friends. i say life is short and just enjoy yourself the way you are. Take some risks so you can find out who you want. And what you like. Maybe you will be bi? Who knows only you. I tell my son also . Its good not to date too much but you should try it . You cant be so lazy about it. You need it to learn. i do. I hope this helps some.
jonestly wrote:
Honeslty i dont know what drives gay men. also im not quite sure what to thinl of myself. i wont tell my exact story but however i will repeat the same question: do gay men fall in love with women? in addition, at first sight? I know i have 3 or 4 times even though i am only 21. Ocasioanally girla are attracted to me but ir never went further then kissing and cuddling. many people suspect im gay and i know hey have reasons to. makes me wonder if wjat they see is right, i mean gay, or that i am just a lonely introverted sucker. i am attracted to men but i never had anu kind od arouaing fewligns for a man. is that beceause i hide thoae feelings? Could i even be aware of hiding any feelings? does rhis sound like just any closet homosexual ? i dont know why, the only thing closest to being gay is wondering if i am and others thinking i am... then he mystery remains unsolved why i ever fell in love with girls some of them i dont even know. i dont talk about sx a lot like some of my friends. so is there a place like a forum where thse kind of stuff is widely discuased? Hello?

Since: Apr 10

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#3354
Jan 24, 2013
 
Oh stop!! ha. I am dating an Egyptian man now. He said i have a single jewish male friend. very successful in life. I am afraid for you two to meet. I said do NOT even worry. Those sucesful mid aged single jew men? They like skinny asian women. they don't want us. They want something different. He laughed and said you are right Bev He looks at asIans all the time. You only say you want as you have no clue who i am ha. Remember that. and you are not with somoene nice yet. You need to smile and say i know a nice lady here and i can meet one in real life. It takes time and it does take mental work. I have been doing it lately. Like the musician( i already emailed this but i cant find it so sorry if redundant. He was was manipulating me. He would say things like i think of you every day but i am sorry i cant see you now,always a good excuse. I tired of that fast.. ha and he kept doing it flattering and not calling. sad and obvioully wanted one thing . He says no and i am high maintenance ha. I somehow wanted to get rid of him fast though, but it sounded good to just have this casual thing with him? for a while but he was so maniputlative i couldnt . i need to be honest i am not good at casual. wish i was sometimes. oh well
Vance wrote:
<quoted text>bev! Lol!! You got me smiling again, what I ment, I wish I had a woman like you to marry! Your a good listener, your healthy with a big but your funny with two personalities.. One is sexy and straight forward. The other is this submissive hot warm jewish girl looking for a soulmate, and wont settle for less. What I been telling you. I love your figure your brown eyes your brunette hair your almond eyes, you can sing and dance. Why not want you??? I do want you bev! But I wont say this again cause you know now. I dont case no one. Your everything I always wanted. Your older and sat in your ways. I feel better now its off pf my chest. I want you and need you! And im not jh ard up or lonely, I want my ibq. Im going jogging with loulou this morning. Take care

Since: Apr 10

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#3355
Jan 24, 2013
 
Johnestly I wrote already and it seems lost so sorry if it comes twice. I think overall i will tell you what i tell my son as he doesnt date and he is 23. I KNOW he is not gay not that it would even phase me . but i tell him get out there and take some risks . dont be lazy as you need to find out who you are. And dating helps you do that. being with a woman helps you see another part of you. so if you go date. maybe you will be bisexual for a while? I dont know but just do it ha. i know men fall in love iwth women. My ex gay friend fell in love with me and with women in high school but never really had sex with me or them. He then in college and beyond had gay men and so he says he is not bi , just gay. I know he fell deeply in love with me and admitted he thought of me all day. I did of him too. so its completely possible but i wouldn't date him(when he was on the rebound i thought) from his ex bf. As i know he will go back to men. He and i had to end our friendship due to his not handling it all real well. but I saw how a gay man can want a man but fall in love anyway with a woman. Think of me even more than his bf he said. also i think no one knows but there are theories many of why a man is gay. Iknow my ex gay friends brother is also gay. but i wouldnt even care , just live an nice life and find happiness. thats the best solution. Iam still working towards that. ha
jonestly wrote:
Honeslty i dont know what drives gay men. also im not quite sure what to thinl of myself. i wont tell my exact story but however i will repeat the same question: do gay men fall in love with women? in addition, at first sight? I know i have 3 or 4 times even though i am only 21. Ocasioanally girla are attracted to me but ir never went further then kissing and cuddling. many people suspect im gay and i know hey have reasons to. makes me wonder if wjat they see is right, i mean gay, or that i am just a lonely introverted sucker. i am attracted to men but i never had anu kind od arouaing fewligns for a man. is that beceause i hide thoae feelings? Could i even be aware of hiding any feelings? does rhis sound like just any closet homosexual ? i dont know why, the only thing closest to being gay is wondering if i am and others thinking i am... then he mystery remains unsolved why i ever fell in love with girls some of them i dont even know. i dont talk about sx a lot like some of my friends. so is there a place like a forum where thse kind of stuff is widely discuased? Hello?
jonestly

Amsterdam, Netherlands

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#3356
Jan 25, 2013
 
thanks bevo309 seems like im in the right place ;-). coming out of the closet is not much of a problem because my dad eveb said put od the blue he would be perfectly okay woth if id turn out to be gay. anyone wouldnt br surprised if i came out of the closet. duno if im really in any closet necause i think im beign very honest and open. but then again i dont know of it works that way; maybe id just have to try sex with all kinds of different people to find out what i (dis)like. this one time, it wasnt at band camp, but a girl was slightly younger and very into me. she harasaed me if she dared but i didnt dare to take it a astep further as i thought itd be inapproproate. one other time i visited a girl frequently and we said bothing just went physical. witthout any further acion. i was having 'a hard time' to not make her feel likr i was interested in only 'one thing'. thats what actually brougt us closer but eventially we broke up because we hadnt sustaiinable supporive ground to stand on. vut i thought of living together woth her, while ahe lives with her parents still, meanwhile i got my own appartment. she dates a lot other men now and i spnt hink pf her that often.. yeah im stil a vrigin and i had lota of chances to loose it and deflour virgin girls... whatever maybe im not intp that, maybe id have to stop making excuses. it could be that i dont have sex because im afraid of t being awkward and a huge turn off! maybe tjat same anxiety is what makes me watch porn to make myaelf believ that i DO know how naked women want te be handled!...
jonestly

Amsterdam, Netherlands

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#3357
Jan 25, 2013
 
not saying that porn is very life-like haha.

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