Think Masturbation is Wrong? Here's The REAL Truth...

Mar 10, 2008 Full story: www.askdanandjennifer.com 45

This is how messed up my understanding of faith and sexuality was as a believer in Jesus. In order to show myself worthy and approved, in order to make sure I can present myself pure before God, self-love was not an option for a believer because it was seen as a sin against God.

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Aaron - Today is that Day

Knoxville, TN

#1 Mar 10, 2008
I dated a girl once who called masturbation "self-appreciation". I thought that was an apt description!:)

“Merry Meet My Friends”

Since: Oct 07

Ohio

#2 Mar 10, 2008
... just one more reason (among many others) to look into Paganism...where sexuality is not a sin...but a gift and a celebration.
67comet

Okinawa, Japan

#3 Mar 10, 2008
If it isn't hurting anyone, get on with your bad self .. Don't worry about fictional characters and fables ..
Curiosity killed the cat

Jupiter, FL

#4 Mar 10, 2008
Well, I for one feel that masturbation while in a relationship is quite repulsive. Do you not agree that it makes the other person feel like they are not properly "servicing" their partner??

I don't get it, I truly don't
Healthy

Quincy, MA

#5 Mar 10, 2008
Curiosity - it's very unfortunate you don't "get it". Masturbation most certainly does NOT mean your partner is failing in their ability to "service" you. Not only is it pleasurable (duh!), it helps you to become more attuned with you body - knowing what you like and becoming more comfortable with your arousal and response. Also, there are plenty of times you're not really in the mood for a love making session with your partner and are simply interested in a quick release. Maybe you're tense, experiencing cramps, having a tough time falling asleep or just plain horny and want to get off quick - whatever! Personally I would feel it was kinda odd if I found out my partner never masturbated. My husband certainly does it, and he knows I do too! We have a wonderful and fulfilling sex life and are both very pleased with how we are "serviced" (don't really like that term). In fact, we often include masturbation while having sex with each other. One thing is for certain - it is NOT repulsive! It's sad that the idea of masturbation causes you to feel repulsed - you (and your partner) are missing out.
Curiosity killed the cat

Jupiter, FL

#6 Mar 10, 2008
Healthy wrote:
Curiosity - it's very unfortunate you don't "get it". Masturbation most certainly does NOT mean your partner is failing in their ability to "service" you. Not only is it pleasurable (duh!), it helps you to become more attuned with you body - knowing what you like and becoming more comfortable with your arousal and response. Also, there are plenty of times you're not really in the mood for a love making session with your partner and are simply interested in a quick release. Maybe you're tense, experiencing cramps, having a tough time falling asleep or just plain horny and want to get off quick - whatever! Personally I would feel it was kinda odd if I found out my partner never masturbated. My husband certainly does it, and he knows I do too! We have a wonderful and fulfilling sex life and are both very pleased with how we are "serviced" (don't really like that term). In fact, we often include masturbation while having sex with each other. One thing is for certain - it is NOT repulsive! It's sad that the idea of masturbation causes you to feel repulsed - you (and your partner) are missing out.
Lets see.... "Service" or "masturbation" I think the latter of the two words rings slight repulsion.. I have no problem "getting off" as you s distastfully put it. That what being into your partner is about.. If you need to or your partner needs help "getting off" Then I would say, someone is not turning the other one on enough.. Just being near my partner arouses me into lathers of anticipation, and have noooooo problem AT ALL taking care of business between the two of us.. no props, or self pleasure needed.. thanks though for the great advice.!!
We are not missing out, trust me, I must just be one of the fortunate ones to be able to "get off" just by interacting with my partner in a sexual way, and same goes for my partner.
Horace Hogsnort

Ripon, CA

#7 Mar 10, 2008
As a charter member of PWU (Pud Whackers Unanimous) I say, SLAP THAT CHICKEN!!!
Anja

UK

#8 Mar 10, 2008
It always surprises me that in this modern day and age, people actually still take some book, all of 2000 years or so old, as determining the principles by which we should live now, whether it is masturbation or any other part of life.
Curiosity killed the cat

Jupiter, FL

#10 Mar 10, 2008
daniel wrote:
masturbation is not wrong. it's a part of everyday life. i do it all the time.
Ok. o, do u do it all the time b/c u are alone, or do you have a fullfilling costant sex life otherwise?? If you re havig sex 3-5times per week, why would someone feel the need to do this??

Since: Feb 08

Location hidden

#11 Mar 10, 2008
Healthy wrote:
Curiosity - it's very unfortunate you don't "get it". Masturbation most certainly does NOT mean your partner is failing in their ability to "service" you. Not only is it pleasurable (duh!), it helps you to become more attuned with you body - knowing what you like and becoming more comfortable with your arousal and response. Also, there are plenty of times you're not really in the mood for a love making session with your partner and are simply interested in a quick release. Maybe you're tense, experiencing cramps, having a tough time falling asleep or just plain horny and want to get off quick - whatever! Personally I would feel it was kinda odd if I found out my partner never masturbated. My husband certainly does it, and he knows I do too! We have a wonderful and fulfilling sex life and are both very pleased with how we are "serviced" (don't really like that term). In fact, we often include masturbation while having sex with each other. One thing is for certain - it is NOT repulsive! It's sad that the idea of masturbation causes you to feel repulsed - you (and your partner) are missing out.
Amen!
Healthy

Quincy, MA

#12 Mar 10, 2008
Curiosity killed the cat wrote:
<quoted text>
Lets see.... "Service" or "masturbation" I think the latter of the two words rings slight repulsion.. I have no problem "getting off" as you s distastfully put it. That what being into your partner is about.. If you need to or your partner needs help "getting off" Then I would say, someone is not turning the other one on enough.. Just being near my partner arouses me into lathers of anticipation, and have noooooo problem AT ALL taking care of business between the two of us.. no props, or self pleasure needed.. thanks though for the great advice.!!
We are not missing out, trust me, I must just be one of the fortunate ones to be able to "get off" just by interacting with my partner in a sexual way, and same goes for my partner.
I never mentioned anything about a dependence on masturbation in order to become aroused. It's unfortunate you equate masturbation to a failure of being aroused by your partner. I detect from your posts a defensiveness - an urgent need to prove how perfect your sexual relationship is by declaring masturbation is no longer necessary because all your needs are being fulfilled entirely by your partner. The problem is, masturbation is NOT a sign that your needs are not being fulfilled - it's simply one part of your sexuality. Of course it's wonderful that you're able to become aroused and "get off" by interacting with your partner. However,continuing to masturbate from time to time doesn't somehow erase the fulfillment your receive from your relationship. So again, I'm sorry this topic causes you to become so agitated. I hope eventually you become more relaxed and comfortable with your sexuality and recognize masturbation as healthy, normal and enjoyable - even as it coincides with being in a fulfilling sexual relationship! I promise, it's ok. Best of luck to you (and your partner!)

Since: Feb 08

Location hidden

#13 Mar 10, 2008
I think Healthy has said it so well, there is nothing more to say. I've been married several years to one woman and masturbation does not take away from our very wonderful sexual relationship. I've had years of a very close and great sexual life and we both masturbate separately and together. "Curiosity" you're just a little off on this point. I understand where you're coming from, but you're wrong about this.

“I love you HHC”

Since: Feb 08

Location hidden

#14 Mar 10, 2008
Curiosity killed the cat wrote:
<quoted text>
Lets see.... "Service" or "masturbation" I think the latter of the two words rings slight repulsion.. I have no problem "getting off" as you s distastfully put it. That what being into your partner is about.. If you need to or your partner needs help "getting off" Then I would say, someone is not turning the other one on enough.. Just being near my partner arouses me into lathers of anticipation, and have noooooo problem AT ALL taking care of business between the two of us.. no props, or self pleasure needed.. thanks though for the great advice.!!
We are not missing out, trust me, I must just be one of the fortunate ones to be able to "get off" just by interacting with my partner in a sexual way, and same goes for my partner.
I always thought that a 'service' was something that you gave your car, not someone that you supposedlt care about and have a relationship with!???. And have you never heard of mutual masterbation?... many couples enjoy watching eachother masterbate and even masterbating together at the same time,...this doesnt mean that they dont 'get off' with eachother through intercourse as well... each to his own but your rather puritanical veiw of masterbation suggests youre not having as much fun as you think you are!...

Since: Mar 08

Jupiter, FL

#15 Mar 10, 2008
RUBEN69 wrote:
<quoted text>
I always thought that a 'service' was something that you gave your car, not someone that you supposedlt care about and have a relationship with!???. And have you never heard of mutual masterbation?... many couples enjoy watching eachother masterbate and even masterbating together at the same time,...this doesnt mean that they dont 'get off' with eachother through intercourse as well... each to his own but your rather puritanical veiw of masterbation suggests youre not having as much fun as you think you are!...
NO... I think everyone should understand that I am not angered, or irritated by this topic, my OPINION is that masturbation is a little.. no alot barberic. It would embarrass me to "get myself off" in front of the person that I love. That's what they are there for. to me it is the ultimate selfishness.... No eed to reply, because i will not be visitig this post again.. I feel dirty just talking about it.. happy diddling to all of ya!!
Redhead

Denver, CO

#16 Mar 10, 2008
Curiosity killed the cat wrote:
<quoted text>
NO... I think everyone should understand that I am not angered, or irritated by this topic, my OPINION is that masturbation is a little.. no alot barberic. It would embarrass me to "get myself off" in front of the person that I love. That's what they are there for. to me it is the ultimate selfishness.... No eed to reply, because i will not be visitig this post again.. I feel dirty just talking about it.. happy diddling to all of ya!!
Score 1 for guilt.
blahblah

United States

#17 Mar 10, 2008
shady mutton wrote:
... just one more reason (among many others) to look into Paganism...where sexuality is not a sin...but a gift and a celebration.
or! you could not have any religion at all... thus proving your ability to make decisions for yourself without relying on a religion for life answers.
PROV1X81

Inglefield, IN

#19 Mar 10, 2008
Curiosity killed the cat wrote:
<quoted text>
Ok. o, do u do it all the time b/c u are alone, or do you have a fullfilling costant sex life otherwise?? If you re havig sex 3-5times per week, why would someone feel the need to do this??
Have you ever masturbated???
if the answer is yes, then shut up and quit being a dumbazz.

Since: Dec 07

United States

#20 Mar 10, 2008
My pastor told me that masturbation is ok if I do it while thinking about Jesus.

Since: Mar 08

Yeah right

#21 Mar 10, 2008
I personally see nothing wrong with masterbation. For women it is a sense of somewhat freeing yourself to explore your body. I am happily married and have a wonderful sex life with my fiancee. My fiancee does masterbate and so do I. It doesn't mean our sex lives are boring, we are just enhancing our sex life. Sometimes we do it alone and sometime mutually. As far as us women go, only we know exactly what it takes to please ourselves. Not only that it's a sense of freedom and relieving anything from just simply our sexual need's to relieveing menstratuib cramps. I even masterbate before my period because it makes the cramps less intense when our periods come. Plus it's a human function. No different then peeing or pooping. It is simply a part of life. I remember the very first time I masterbated, it was awesome!! Not only did I learn more about my own body and how my body responds, but I also found out I was multi-orgasmic!!! I also don't recall anywhere in the bible where it says masterbating is a sin. At least I'm not out committing adultery with another man. It's me by myself or with my finacee. And why would God give us sexual desires if he didn't want us to have sex with ourselves or other people. I was taught at a very young age that sex was dirty. Now that I am older I realize this is simply not true. Masterbation comes as a natural and bvery innocent act. As said befor as long as you are not committing adultry and do this by yourself or with your husband, I see nothing wrong with this. I notice too that a lot of christians take too much context out of the bible.
Steven

Gainesville, FL

#22 Mar 10, 2008
Alpha Omega Game wrote:
My pastor told me that masturbation is ok if I do it while thinking about Jesus.
Well, Alpha: Did your pastor tell you what he thinks about? This country needs to wake up about sex. Masturbation is normal and natural. You don't get warts, or go blind. Ole time religion wants to 'beat' everyone into following their dogma. Hell fire and damnation ruined alot of people. The most powerful religious song out there is:'Just As I Am'. What more do you need? Life has changed alot over the last 2000 years. We need to love ourselves, our bodies,our minds. Only then can you really love and/or appreciate your partners (male or female). One more thing. Masturbation was made a sin, because the 'seed' was spilled & lost. That was only because the church was trying to populate the earth, so they could collect more 'tithe' to fill their pockets. It worked. A Catholic friend said: A good Catholic knows how to pray, obey and pay. Very true in most religions that I know of. Good luck with your beliefs, but try to have an open mind when dealing with your sexuality. You might have more fun.

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