What do you want to do tonight, Brain?<quoted text>
It's not just those dirty Jews, the New World Order, the Illuminati and the Masons are all in on the plot to undermines family values.
It's part of a (secret) plot to control the world population by turning our kids gay!!!!!! I read all about it on the interwebs so I know it's TRUE!
The only thing you can do to save your self is to start building a bunker and hoarding GOLD.
And BTW TOPIX is part of the plot too. THEY want you here while THEY put the MASTER PLAN in place, so STOP wasting time on TOPIX and start digging that underground shelter now!
Same thing we do every night, Pinky, try to take over the world!