Nicholas Brendon

[NewKelly]

Kamaleeka wrote:

Oh NewKelly, I don't know what I did to cause all of this angst you are posting about. You are too funny! I only wish the best for you, girl. I never said you ordered that school closed. Nobody thinks that you have such power.
You need to take a chill pill and quit thinking that everyone is out to get you.
Later, gator!

Kamaleeka please read my apology below this.
Your friend, NewKelly

[Kamaleeka]

NewKelly, Your 34? I thought that you were probably in your early 20's, still living with your parents. You need to move out and get on with your life, be more independent, make your own decisions, be your own person.

Does your mom still have a lot of influence over your life? It sounds like she does. You should have cut those apron strings a long time ago.

You take care of yourself, NewKelly.

Later Gator.

[NewKelly]

I don't feel like discussing my situation with
Mom with anyone at all, thank you. All I know is that she's a truly wonderful woman, and I've become a better person, lately, praying more everyday counting my blessings, and liking myself more. I don't regret stating my opinions, either, because especially in the end I truly believed in it. It's not all always being hateful, or jealous regarding a situation. That's biased.

[NewKelly]

I'm just moving on, working towards my goals
everyday, and being happier.

[NewKelly]

I just want to work through things myself, right
now, though, without anyone's help, or advice, even Kamaleeka, no offense to her, to become more independent. I hold grudges, sometimes. For example, I can't get the woman's referring to my opinion accompanied by facts as just being jealous, and hateful, out of my mind. After all, her doing so just reflected her own dirty-minded, suspicious motive, accusing me. I don't hate her, though. It just hurt my feelings, but I realize she was just protecting her staff. Besides, she also gave me valuable advice, to just recall the
good times over the bad.

[NewKelly]

That's helped, a lot, really. Besides, I acted that way in the past, so I can't really blame them for thinking that. I just don't intend to, again, that's all. Praying, and posting my feelings online,is helping me to move on, and feel better.

[NewKelly]

It just occurred to me that anyone saying if they
had parts of their life, evil, to do over again, they'd do it differently is full of it. You wouldn't
because it was worth it, to you at the time. That's not to say we can't change, but get over the opposition. You loved that feeling of power, momentarily, and you wouldn't take it back for anything. Therefore, people spying on others, thinking they're gossiping, running away from people
in the hall, reading remarks constantly on Topix,
getting off on mean remarks about someone else,
"gossiping" about like high schoolers.

[NewKelly]

Making fun of others in front of others, getting rid of them, and giggling about it like high schoolers. Doing this when you're supposed to be working on what's really important is no different
or better than someone's spying on the webpage, even on someone's "My Space" page, being deliberately rude to others in the past, because you wanted to see what would happen, because after
all you feel you hadn't done enough of it before right? Calling that facility sometimes, and hanging up, sometimes, with them doing nothing about it, because they feel sorry for you, thinking they're better than you. They're not. Forgive yourself so you can forgive them.

[NewKelly]

It's the only way to truly move on and like yourself. That's my view.

[def]

??????

[NewKelly]

I just did something else which helped me move
on. God, and Jesus, I love you so much. Thanks for all your wonderful blessings. Keep helping me to make myself a better person, like myself, but be humble, and others to keep following you, too.
Thanks, so much.

[NewKelly]

I'm just talking to myself. High or low times, in any work facility people always have a right to speak their minds about things they feel strongly about. Given the way society behaves perhaps, sometimes, the Internet is
the best place to vent.

[NewKelly]

You know in order to move on completely, I have to
be honest.In our angry way, some members of the club, and I did want the school to close down for our personal benefit. We felt we were the victims. We're not, anymore! I thought that if I posted what happened on Topix, the issues would automatically change, regarding christian schools, too. They won't. Perhaps with time, prayer, and speaking out, though, they will.

[NewKelly]

I have no more regrets about working at Orcutt
Baptist School anymore. It was a wonderful opportunity, especially when Mom called me, recommending it. I was feeling very lost at the time, and appreciated it. I loved the children, and
people I met there, too.

[NewKelly]

Regrets are poisonous after a while, too.

[NewKelly]

Who am I kidding? Today, their closing is a revelation for me. Oh don't get me wrong. The spying
has partially been because I'm nosy,I don't have a full-time job right now, except for writing but I'm
glad that me, my friends, and family can finally find true forgiveness, hopefully they all can too,
so we can all practice what we preach.

[NewKelly]

I'm not saying this is the only reason things
happen. However, sometimes, the downfall of others
is what it takes to help others find peace of mind,
and stop being the victim.

[NewKelly]

However, I still have no more regrets.